9 Rules of Engagement

1. Recruit Your Special Forces: Build a Supportive Inner Circle

"The people in your life have an expiration date. You will lose some through death, attrition, their own desires to do greater things, and a host of other reasons. Your ability to let go of them is as important as whom you choose to hang on to."

Cultivate a strong support system. Identify individuals who genuinely support your goals and aspirations. These are people who will stand by you in times of need, offer honest feedback, and celebrate your successes. They should be trustworthy, competent, and aligned with your values.

Actively engage with your inner circle. Regularly communicate with your special forces, seeking their advice and offering support in return. This reciprocal relationship strengthens bonds and ensures mutual growth. Be willing to let go of relationships that no longer serve your best interests, making room for new, more supportive connections.

Qualities to look for in your special forces:

• Trustworthiness
• Competence
• Shared values
• Willingness to offer honest feedback
• Ability to celebrate your successes
• Readiness to support you in times of need

2. Deal with Your Demons: Overcome Personal Challenges

"Deal with your demons. We all have a sense of what our worst habits are. We dismiss them because they seem perfectly harmless at a distance. But you must consider not just how your bad habits obstruct your way, but also how they can be detrimental to the goals and resources of the people you care about."

Identify and confront personal obstacles. Recognize your negative habits, fears, and limiting beliefs that hinder your progress. These "demons" may seem insignificant at first but can significantly impact your success and relationships if left unchecked.

Develop strategies to overcome challenges. Once identified, create actionable plans to address your personal demons. This may involve seeking professional help, adopting new habits, or reframing your mindset. Remember that overcoming these obstacles not only benefits you but also positively impacts those around you.

Steps to deal with your demons:

1. Identify negative habits and limiting beliefs
2. Assess their impact on your goals and relationships
3. Develop actionable strategies to address them
4. Seek support from your inner circle or professionals
5. Regularly evaluate progress and adjust as needed

3. Stay Ready: Maintain Physical, Mental, and Spiritual Preparedness

"Stay ready so you don't have to get ready."

Physical readiness. Engage in regular exercise and maintain a healthy lifestyle. This not only improves your physical health but also enhances your mental clarity and emotional resilience. Choose activities that challenge you and align with your personal preferences.

Mental preparedness. Continuously educate yourself and stay informed about your field and the world around you. Develop critical thinking skills and practice problem-solving. Engage in activities that stimulate your mind, such as reading, puzzles, or learning new skills.

Spiritual readiness. Nurture your inner self through practices that align with your beliefs and values. This could involve meditation, prayer, mindfulness, or connecting with nature. Spiritual readiness provides a foundation for emotional stability and purpose.

Ways to stay ready:

• Regular exercise routine
• Healthy diet and sleep habits
• Continuous learning and skill development
• Mindfulness or meditation practices
• Staying informed about your field and current events

4. Devise Your Mission: Plan and Execute with Purpose

"Success is far less likely without devising a complete mission plan—one that includes a well-thought-out game plan, lots of training, the agility to come up with a contingency on a moment's notice, and the sense to take away a lesson from the experience for future reference."

Define clear objectives. Establish specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound (SMART) goals for your personal and professional life. These objectives should align with your values and long-term vision.

Create a detailed action plan. Break down your mission into smaller, manageable tasks. Identify the resources, skills, and support needed to accomplish each step. Anticipate potential obstacles and develop contingency plans.

Execute with flexibility and learn from experience. Implement your plan with determination, but be prepared to adapt as circumstances change. Regularly assess your progress, celebrate successes, and learn from setbacks. Use these experiences to refine your approach for future missions.

Key components of a mission plan:

1. Clear, SMART objectives
2. Detailed action steps
3. Resource allocation
4. Contingency plans
5. Regular progress assessments
6. Lessons learned for future improvement

5. Wear Camo: Adapt and Strategize in Every Situation

"Dress according to what the battle lines look like."

Assess your environment. Carefully observe and analyze the situation you're in, whether it's a new job, social setting, or challenge. Identify the key players, potential obstacles, and opportunities for success.

Adapt your approach. Based on your assessment, adjust your behavior, communication style, and strategies to best fit the environment. This doesn't mean compromising your values, but rather presenting yourself in a way that maximizes your effectiveness.

Blend in when necessary, stand out when appropriate. Know when to draw attention to yourself and when to work behind the scenes. Sometimes, the most effective strategy is to quietly gather information and build relationships before making bold moves.

Strategies for wearing camo:

• Observe before acting
• Adjust communication style to your audience
• Identify and leverage your unique strengths
• Build relationships strategically
• Choose your battles wisely

6. Unleash the Power of Integrity: Lead with Honor and Ethics

"Integrity is activated by choice and you can choose to use it from this point forward whenever it is needed."

Embody your values. Define your personal code of ethics and consistently live by it, even when faced with difficult decisions or temptations. Your integrity should be evident in both your words and actions.

Build trust through consistency. Demonstrate reliability and honesty in all your interactions. When you make mistakes, own up to them and take corrective action. This builds credibility and respect among peers, subordinates, and superiors.

Lead by example. Use your integrity to inspire and influence others. When you consistently do the right thing, even when it's challenging, you set a powerful example for those around you and create a culture of ethical behavior.

Ways to unleash the power of integrity:

• Define and live by your personal code of ethics
• Be consistent in your words and actions
• Take responsibility for mistakes and learn from them
• Make ethical decisions, even when it's difficult
• Use your integrity to inspire and influence others

7. Think Like a General: Develop Strategic Leadership Skills

"Generals make generals."

Cultivate a broad perspective. Look beyond immediate challenges to see the bigger picture. Consider long-term consequences and how your decisions impact various stakeholders. Develop the ability to anticipate potential obstacles and opportunities.

Make decisive, informed decisions. Gather relevant information, consult with trusted advisors, and weigh options carefully. Once you've made a decision, commit to it fully and execute with conviction.

Develop and empower others. Recognize that your success as a leader depends on the strength of your team. Invest in developing the skills and potential of those around you. Delegate responsibilities and trust others to execute their roles effectively.

Key aspects of thinking like a general:

• Strategic planning and foresight
• Decisive decision-making
• Team development and empowerment
• Adaptability in the face of changing circumstances
• Balancing immediate needs with long-term goals

8. Own Your Moment: Embrace Recognition and Inspire Others

"If you're going to rise, you may as well shine."

Accept recognition graciously. When you achieve success or receive accolades, embrace the moment with humility and appreciation. Acknowledge the contributions of others who helped you along the way.

Use your platform to inspire. When in the spotlight, seize the opportunity to motivate and encourage others. Share insights from your journey, including challenges you've overcome and lessons learned.

Pay it forward. Look for ways to create opportunities for others to shine. Mentor up-and-coming talent, champion the achievements of your team members, and use your influence to open doors for deserving individuals.

Ways to own your moment:

• Accept recognition with grace and humility
• Share credit with those who supported you
• Use your success to inspire and motivate others
• Create opportunities for others to shine
• Continually set new goals and challenges for yourself

9. When Things Fall Apart, Believe You Have the Answer: Cultivate Emotional Resilience

"When you hit a bump in the road you've got to figure out the best way to keep it from stopping your forward motion."

Develop a growth mindset. View challenges and setbacks as opportunities for learning and growth rather than insurmountable obstacles. Believe in your ability to adapt and overcome difficulties.

Practice emotional regulation. Learn techniques to manage stress and intense emotions effectively. This may include mindfulness practices, deep breathing exercises, or seeking support from trusted confidants.

Draw on past experiences. Reflect on previous challenges you've overcome and the strengths you developed in the process. Use these memories as a source of confidence and inspiration when facing new obstacles.

Strategies for cultivating emotional resilience:

• Develop a growth mindset
• Practice stress management techniques
• Seek support from your inner circle
• Learn from past experiences
• Focus on solutions rather than problems
• Maintain perspective during difficult times

Last updated: August 31, 2024