A World Waiting to Be Born

1. Civility is consciously motivated organizational behavior, ethical and submissive to a Higher Power

"Civility is consciously motivated organizational behavior that is ethical in submission to a Higher Power."

Redefining civility. This definition goes beyond mere politeness, emphasizing the importance of consciousness, ethics, and spiritual alignment in our interactions within organizations. It requires individuals to be aware of their actions, consider their ethical implications, and align them with a higher purpose or moral standard.

Cornerstones of civility:

• Consciousness of self, others, and the organization
• Ethical behavior guided by moral principles
• Submission to a Higher Power or greater good
• Willingness to bear necessary suffering and discomfort
• Ability to distinguish between necessary and unnecessary conflict

Civility, in this context, becomes a powerful tool for creating healthier, more effective organizations and societies. It challenges individuals to rise above self-interest and consider the broader impact of their actions on the community and the world at large.

2. Narcissism is the principal precursor of incivility in personal and professional relationships

"Narcissists are incapable of I-Thou relationships."

Understanding narcissism. Narcissism, characterized by an excessive focus on self and lack of empathy for others, is a major obstacle to civil behavior. In both personal and professional settings, narcissistic individuals struggle to form genuine, mutually respectful relationships.

Types of narcissistic relationships:

• I-It: Treating others as objects to be used
• I-Them: Viewing others as enemies or threats
• I-I: Inability to recognize others as separate beings

The impact of narcissism on organizations can be devastating, leading to:

• Poor communication and collaboration
• Lack of trust and teamwork
• Ineffective leadership and decision-making
• Toxic work environments and high turnover

Recognizing and addressing narcissistic tendencies in ourselves and others is crucial for fostering civil behavior and creating healthier, more productive relationships and organizations.

3. Vocation is a calling from God, often in conflict with financial security and societal expectations

"The place God calls you to is the place where your deep gladness and the world's deep hunger meet."

Defining vocation. Vocation goes beyond mere occupation, representing a divine calling that aligns an individual's talents and passions with the world's needs. This concept challenges the conventional focus on financial success and societal expectations, urging individuals to seek deeper meaning and purpose in their work.

Key aspects of vocation:

• Personal fulfillment and joy in one's work
• Meeting a genuine need in the world
• Potential conflict with financial security or societal norms
• Requires discernment and courage to pursue

Embracing one's true vocation often involves difficult choices and sacrifices. It may mean leaving a well-paying job for a more fulfilling but less lucrative career, or challenging societal expectations to pursue an unconventional path. The pursuit of vocation requires individuals to trust in a higher purpose and find the courage to align their lives with their deepest values and beliefs.

4. Effective leaders must balance spiritual and political power, resisting temptations of authority

"To exercise temporal power with civility is to undertake a role of great glory, and it can only be undertaken with genuine humility."

Leadership challenges. Effective leadership requires a delicate balance between spiritual power (influence through character and values) and political power (influence through position and authority). Leaders face constant temptations to abuse their authority for personal gain or ego gratification.

Three temptations of leadership:

1. Security: Using power for personal comfort and safety
2. Spiritual flashiness: Seeking admiration and adulation
3. Rulership: Desiring power for its own sake

Civil leaders must:

• Cultivate humility and servant leadership
• Resist the urge to cling to power or position
• Empower others and share authority
• Maintain ethical integrity in decision-making
• Seek guidance from a Higher Power or moral compass

By resisting these temptations and maintaining a balance between spiritual and political power, leaders can create more civil, effective, and ethical organizations that serve the greater good.

5. Healthy organizations embrace tension and conflict, avoiding adversarialism and pseudoconsensus

"Tension is conflict. It is extremely important for us to understand that conflict in human affairs is healthy and normal."

Embracing healthy conflict. Contrary to popular belief, tension and conflict are not inherently negative in organizations. In fact, they are essential for growth, innovation, and problem-solving. The key is to manage conflict constructively rather than avoiding it or allowing it to escalate into destructive adversarialism.

Balancing act for organizations:

• Avoid unnecessary adversarialism: Resist the urge to immediately take sides or engage in blame
• Prevent pseudoconsensus: Don't suppress or ignore real issues for the sake of false harmony
• Create safe spaces for open dialogue and disagreement
• Develop skills in conflict resolution and collaborative problem-solving
• Foster a culture that values diverse perspectives and constructive debate

Healthy organizations "walk the tightrope" by acknowledging and addressing tensions openly, while maintaining respect and civility. This approach leads to more creative solutions, stronger relationships, and ultimately, more effective and resilient organizations.

6. Community building is the most effective vehicle for teaching and practicing civility

"Community building is the vehicle, par excellence, for both the teaching and the learning of civility."

Power of community. The process of building and maintaining community provides a unique and powerful context for individuals to learn and practice civil behavior. It challenges participants to move beyond superficial politeness and engage in authentic, respectful communication and collaboration.

Stages of community building:

1. Pseudocommunity: Superficial politeness and avoidance of conflict
2. Chaos: Emergence of differences and attempts to "fix" others
3. Emptiness: Letting go of expectations, prejudices, and need for control
4. True community: Authentic communication, respect for differences, and collective wisdom

Benefits of community building in organizations:

• Increased empathy and understanding among members
• More effective communication and problem-solving
• Greater creativity and innovation
• Improved morale and job satisfaction
• Enhanced ability to navigate complex ethical issues

By engaging in community building processes, organizations can create environments where civility is not just taught, but lived and experienced on a daily basis.

7. Empowerment and collaboration are key to civil leadership and organizational success

"The only civil reason to seek power is to lose it, to give it away."

Redefining power. Civil leadership involves a fundamental shift in how we view and use power. Instead of hoarding authority, truly effective leaders seek to empower others and foster collaboration. This approach not only leads to more civil organizations but also to greater innovation, engagement, and overall success.

Principles of civil leadership:

• Servant leadership: Prioritizing the needs of others and the organization
• Empowerment: Developing and trusting others to take on responsibility
• Collaboration: Fostering teamwork and shared decision-making
• Transparency: Open communication and sharing of information
• Continuous learning: Encouraging growth and development at all levels

Strategies for implementation:

• Develop participatory and consensual decision-making processes
• Create mentoring and coaching programs
• Implement flat or horizontal organizational structures
• Encourage cross-functional teams and projects
• Recognize and reward collaborative behaviors

By embracing these principles, leaders can create more civil, dynamic, and successful organizations that are better equipped to navigate the complexities of the modern business world.

Last updated: August 18, 2024