Bitita's Diary

1. Poverty and racial discrimination shape Carolina's early life

"I was horrified when I saw women hugging men. I thought, 'Why is it that women hug men and that men are so happy with the caresses of women?'"

Harsh realities of poverty. Carolina's childhood in Sacramento, Minas Gerais, is marked by extreme poverty and racial discrimination. As a black child born out of wedlock, she faces multiple layers of societal prejudice. Her family lives in a thatched-roof shack, struggling daily for basic necessities.

Racial dynamics. The social hierarchy places whites at the top, mixed-race mulatos in the middle, and blacks at the bottom. Carolina observes and internalizes these racial dynamics from a young age, noting how even within her own family, lighter-skinned relatives receive preferential treatment. This early exposure to racial inequality shapes her understanding of society and her place within it.

Limited opportunities. Carolina's options are severely limited by her race and social status. She witnesses the exploitation of black workers on farms and in domestic service, realizing that escaping poverty will be an uphill battle. Despite these challenges, Carolina's keen observations and questioning nature begin to develop, laying the foundation for her future as a writer and social commentator.

2. Education becomes a source of hope and empowerment

"Now I know how to read! How good it is to know how to read!"

Transformative power of literacy. At age seven, Carolina begins school, initially resistant but soon discovering the transformative power of reading. Learning to read opens up a new world of knowledge and possibilities, sparking her intellectual curiosity and providing an escape from her harsh reality.

Overcoming barriers. Despite facing discrimination and low expectations due to her race, Carolina excels in her studies. Her teacher employs clever tactics to motivate both black and white students, fostering healthy competition and challenging racial stereotypes about intelligence and ability.

Lifelong pursuit of knowledge. Carolina's love for reading and learning becomes a lifelong passion. Even after leaving formal schooling, she continues to educate herself through books, newspapers, and conversations with educated people. This self-education plays a crucial role in her development as a writer and thinker, enabling her to articulate her experiences and observations of Brazilian society.

3. The struggle for work and dignity in a prejudiced society

"I became an outraged woman. I began to travel, seeking treatment. I got well. What happiness!"

Constant job-seeking. Carolina's life is characterized by a constant search for work, moving from city to city and farm to farm. She takes on various roles, including domestic servant, nanny, and cook, often facing exploitation and unfair treatment from employers.

Discrimination in employment. Her race and health issues (leg sores) frequently lead to rejection or dismissal from jobs. Carolina observes how even when she performs well, her blackness is seen as a liability by many employers.

Dignity in work. Despite the challenges, Carolina strives to maintain her dignity and work ethic. She takes pride in her abilities and constantly seeks to improve her skills, especially as a cook. This determination eventually leads her to better employment opportunities and a sense of self-worth.

4. Health challenges and the quest for medical care

"Hidden sicknesses don't stop us from working, but visible sicknesses do."

Debilitating leg sores. Carolina suffers from painful and persistent leg sores that significantly impact her ability to work and her overall quality of life. This condition becomes a central struggle in her narrative, symbolizing the broader health challenges faced by poor Brazilians.

Seeking treatment. Her quest for medical care takes her on journeys to various cities, highlighting the inadequate healthcare available to the poor. Carolina experiences both kindness and rejection in her search for treatment, from charitable nuns to dismissive doctors.

Health and social status. Carolina's health issues intersect with her racial and economic status, often exacerbating her marginalization. She observes how visible illnesses make it even harder for the poor to find work and acceptance in society.

5. The impact of political changes on the poor

"With Getúlio, Brazil is going, with Getúlio, Brazil won't fall."

Hope in political change. Carolina witnesses the 1930 Revolution and the rise of Getúlio Vargas to power. Initially, there is great optimism among the poor that Vargas's policies will improve their lives.

Observed improvements. Carolina notes some positive changes under Vargas's rule:

• Increased employment opportunities
• Labor laws protecting workers' rights
• Greater economic stability
• A sense of national pride and progress

Persistent inequality. Despite these changes, Carolina observes that fundamental inequalities persist. The poor continue to struggle, and racial discrimination remains entrenched in society. Her experiences reveal the limitations of political changes in addressing deep-rooted social issues.

6. Perseverance in the face of adversity and family rejection

"Family … something I don't have."

Rejection by relatives. Carolina faces rejection and mistreatment from her own family members, particularly her aunt in Ribeirão Preto. This rejection is painful but also strengthens her resolve to succeed independently.

Homeless periods. Carolina experiences periods of homelessness, sleeping on streets or in shelters. These experiences reinforce her determination to achieve stability and dignity in her life.

Resilience and self-reliance. Despite numerous setbacks and hardships, Carolina maintains a remarkable resilience. She continually picks herself up after failures and rejections, relying on her own strength and abilities to survive and improve her situation.

7. Finding purpose and self-worth through writing and work

"I decided to study diligently, understanding that we should even thank someone when they want to teach us."

Developing as a writer. Throughout her struggles, Carolina finds solace and purpose in writing. She begins keeping diaries and writing poetry, using her literacy skills to document her experiences and observations of Brazilian society.

Pride in work. As Carolina improves her skills, particularly as a cook, she takes great pride in her work. This sense of accomplishment becomes a source of self-worth and motivation to continue improving her life.

Aspiration for land and independence. Carolina dreams of owning her own land to cultivate, seeing this as a path to true independence and dignity. This aspiration reflects her desire for stability and self-sufficiency after years of precarious living.

Legacy of resilience. Carolina's story, as told in her memoirs, becomes a powerful testament to human resilience in the face of extreme adversity. Her ability to maintain hope and dignity despite numerous challenges offers inspiration and insight into the lives of marginalized people in mid-20th century Brazil.

Last updated: September 17, 2024