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Calm Christmas and a Happy New Year

Calm Christmas and a Happy New Year

A little book of festive joy
by Beth Kempton 2019 240 pages
4.08
1.3K ratings
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Key Takeaways

1. Embrace the Five Stories of Christmas to Discover Your Ideal Celebration

Christmas is at once almost universally recognized and intensely individual.

The Five Stories of Christmas help us understand our personal connections to the holiday:

  1. The Story of Faith: Religious aspects and spiritual traditions
  2. The Story of Magic: Santa Claus, reindeer, and childhood wonder
  3. The Story of Connection: Gatherings, feasts, and shared experiences
  4. The Story of Abundance: Gift-giving, decorations, and commercial aspects
  5. The Story of Heritage: Family traditions and cultural customs

By identifying which stories resonate most with you, you can create a Christmas celebration that aligns with your values and brings you joy. Use the Christmas Constellation exercise to plot your connection to each story and compare with loved ones to find common ground and understanding.

2. Plan a Calm Christmas by Setting Intentions and Boundaries

Simplicity, generosity, delight, and belonging are the true touchstones of festive joy.

Set clear intentions for your ideal Christmas experience:

  • Reflect on what kind of celebration would be most nourishing given your current circumstances
  • Consider how you want to feel at the end of the holiday season
  • Establish boundaries to help achieve your desired experience

Practical planning tips:

  • Create a budget and stick to it
  • Reduce unnecessary gift-giving obligations
  • Simplify gatherings and spread out social events
  • Delegate tasks and ask for help when needed
  • Leave room for spontaneity and quiet moments

By thoughtfully planning and setting boundaries, you can create a calmer, more enjoyable Christmas that aligns with your values and energy levels.

3. Nourish Mind, Body, and Spirit During Winter's Natural Rhythms

Winter is surprisingly kind in many ways, but mostly because it expects so little of us.

Align with nature's rhythms to nurture yourself during the winter season:

  • Recognize the natural tendency to slow down and rest
  • Create cozy spaces for relaxation and reflection
  • Engage in gentle, nourishing activities

Winter wellness practices:

  • Take brisk walks in nature to invigorate body and mind
  • Prepare warming, nutritious meals with seasonal ingredients
  • Practice mindfulness through meditation or journaling
  • Maintain sleep routines and prioritize rest
  • Engage in creative pursuits or hobbies that bring joy

By honoring winter's invitation to slow down and turn inward, you can emerge from the season feeling refreshed and rejuvenated, rather than depleted and stressed.

4. Practice Mindful Gifting and Gathering for Meaningful Connections

When we give with genuine generosity and compassion, we generate joy for the recipient and ourselves.

Mindful gifting focuses on three key questions:

  1. Is it mindful? (Considerate of the recipient's circumstances and preferences)
  2. Is it meaningful? (Strengthens your bond or enhances their life)
  3. Is it memorable? (Unique, surprising, or connected to shared experiences)

Tips for meaningful gatherings:

  • Create sacred time for one-on-one connections with loved ones
  • Share the load of hosting and meal preparation
  • Establish a quiet corner for moments of respite
  • Plan activities that encourage connection and shared experiences
  • Be flexible and let go of perfection

By approaching gift-giving and gatherings with intention and care, you can create lasting memories and deepen relationships during the holiday season.

5. Honor Melancholy and Create Space for Joy Amidst Holiday Challenges

We cannot know the precise nature of someone else's emotional experience at this time of year—the shadow of loss, the beating heart of sorrow, the searing pain of loneliness, the dull ache of wishing things were different—but we can be mindful of what it might feel like, based on our own experience, careful observation, and empathy.

Acknowledge and support those experiencing difficulties during the holidays:

  • Recognize that loneliness, grief, and sadness are common experiences
  • Offer compassion and understanding to yourself and others
  • Create space for both melancholy and joy

Strategies for coping and supporting others:

  • Reach out to friends and family, even with small gestures
  • Practice self-care through nutrition, exercise, and rest
  • Volunteer or engage in acts of kindness
  • Adjust expectations and traditions as needed
  • Seek professional support if struggling with intense emotions

By honoring the full range of emotions that arise during the holiday season, we can create a more inclusive and compassionate celebration that allows for both joy and reflection.

6. Savor the "Hush" Between Christmas and New Year for Reflection

The Hush is a precious time. We face so much change in the course of an average year, in the wider world and in our own lives.

Embrace the quiet period between Christmas and New Year's Day:

  • Use this time for rest, reflection, and rejuvenation
  • Create space for processing the events of the past year
  • Allow yourself to dream and plan for the future

Ideas for savoring the Hush:

  • Take a day in nature to reconnect with the natural world
  • Engage in a digital detox to reduce stimulation
  • Spend time journaling or creative pursuits
  • Declutter your physical space to create mental clarity
  • Connect with loved ones in low-key, relaxed settings

By intentionally using this unique time of year, you can set the stage for a more mindful and purposeful transition into the New Year.

7. Envision Your Future with Gentle New Year Planning

Dream, scheme, and ease yourself in. Assess the amount of energy you have for the coming year, and pledge to remain open to new ideas.

Approach New Year planning with gentleness and flexibility:

  • Avoid the pressure to completely reinvent yourself
  • Focus on gradual, meaningful change aligned with your values
  • Allow time for ideas to percolate and evolve

Steps for gentle visioning:

  1. Acknowledge your dreams and aspirations
  2. Identify your current position in the Dream Development Process
  3. Set loose plans that align with your natural rhythms and energy levels
  4. Create nourishing rituals rather than rigid resolutions
  5. Revisit and adjust your plans as the year progresses

By taking a more organic approach to New Year planning, you can create sustainable change and growth that honors your unique needs and circumstances.

Last updated:

FAQ

1. What is "Calm Christmas and a Happy New Year" by Beth Kempton about?

  • Gentle guide to Christmas: The book offers a holistic, nurturing approach to the festive season, focusing on well-being, self-care, and joy rather than perfection or commercialism.
  • Personal stories and research: Kempton weaves together her own experiences, stories from people around the world, and research into the history and psychology of Christmas.
  • Flexible, inclusive perspective: The book acknowledges that there is no single way to celebrate Christmas, embracing diverse traditions, beliefs, and family structures.
  • Practical tools and reflection: It provides practical advice, journaling prompts, and frameworks to help readers create a meaningful, calm, and restorative holiday season.

2. Why should I read "Calm Christmas and a Happy New Year" by Beth Kempton?

  • Reduce festive stress: The book addresses the common stress, exhaustion, and overwhelm associated with the holidays, offering strategies to avoid them.
  • Find personal meaning: It helps readers reconnect with what truly matters to them at Christmas, encouraging the creation of new, authentic traditions.
  • Support for all circumstances: Whether you love Christmas, struggle with it, or feel lonely or sad during the season, the book offers compassion and practical support.
  • Year-round relevance: Kempton positions the book as a guide for life, not just Christmas, with lessons and rituals that can be applied throughout the year.

3. What are the key takeaways from "Calm Christmas and a Happy New Year"?

  • No one-size-fits-all Christmas: Every person’s Christmas is unique, shaped by their own stories, values, and circumstances.
  • Five Stories of Christmas: Understanding your connection to Faith, Magic, Connection, Abundance, and Heritage can help you design a celebration that fits you.
  • Intentional planning and boundaries: Thoughtful preparation, setting intentions, and saying no to unnecessary obligations are essential for a calm holiday.
  • Self-care and reflection: Prioritizing rest, nourishment, and emotional well-being is vital, as is using the post-Christmas period for reflection and gentle planning for the year ahead.

4. How does Beth Kempton define a "calm Christmas" in her book?

  • Letting go of perfection: A calm Christmas is not about executing a flawless holiday but about embracing imperfection and flexibility.
  • Honoring personal needs: It means shaping the season around what you and your loved ones truly need and value, rather than inherited or commercial expectations.
  • Creating space for rest: The book emphasizes the importance of rest, reflection, and rejuvenation, especially between Christmas and New Year.
  • Focusing on connection and joy: A calm Christmas centers on meaningful connections, simple pleasures, and moments of genuine joy.

5. What are the "Five Stories of Christmas" in "Calm Christmas and a Happy New Year" and why are they important?

  • Story of Faith: Relates to religious or spiritual aspects of Christmas, such as the Nativity and carols.
  • Story of Magic: Encompasses the wonder and enchantment of the season, including Santa Claus and childhood traditions.
  • Story of Connection: Focuses on gathering, feasting, and the importance of relationships and togetherness.
  • Story of Abundance: Involves gift-giving, festive shopping, and the commercial side of Christmas, both its joys and pitfalls.
  • Story of Heritage: Reflects family traditions, cultural rituals, and personal or ancestral customs.
  • Framework for understanding: Recognizing which stories resonate most helps you identify sources of joy and stress, and guides you in crafting a meaningful celebration.

6. What is the "Christmas Constellation" method in Beth Kempton's book, and how can it help me?

  • Personalized planning tool: The Christmas Constellation is a chart where you rate the importance of each of the Five Stories of Christmas to you.
  • Clarifies priorities: By visualizing your scores, you can see which aspects of Christmas matter most and which you can let go of.
  • Facilitates communication: Comparing your constellation with those of loved ones helps identify shared values and potential sources of conflict or compromise.
  • Annual ritual: Kempton suggests revisiting your constellation each year, as your needs and circumstances may change.

7. How does "Calm Christmas and a Happy New Year" by Beth Kempton address holiday stress and overwhelm?

  • Encourages thoughtful planning: The book advocates for setting intentions, creating budgets, and spreading out preparations to avoid last-minute panic.
  • Promotes boundaries: It suggests saying no to unnecessary obligations, reducing gift lists, and simplifying gatherings.
  • Focuses on self-care: Kempton emphasizes the importance of rest, nourishment, and maintaining routines during the busy season.
  • Offers practical exercises: The book includes journaling prompts, stress-mapping tables, and mindfulness techniques to help manage triggers and maintain calm.

8. What advice does Beth Kempton give about mindful gifting in "Calm Christmas and a Happy New Year"?

  • Question the need to give: She encourages releasing people from unnecessary social gifting contracts to reduce stress and waste.
  • Mindful, meaningful, memorable: Gifts should be chosen with attention to the recipient’s needs, be meaningful, and create lasting memories.
  • Consider environmental impact: The book suggests reducing, reusing, and creatively wrapping gifts to minimize waste.
  • Gifting yourself: Kempton also advocates for giving yourself a thoughtful gift, whether it’s time, rest, or something you truly desire.

9. How does "Calm Christmas and a Happy New Year" help readers deal with sadness, loneliness, or grief during the holidays?

  • Normalizes difficult emotions: The book acknowledges that Christmas can be a time of sadness, loss, or loneliness for many, not just joy.
  • Practical coping strategies: It offers tips for self-care, reaching out for support, and honoring absent loved ones or changed circumstances.
  • Encourages compassion: Kempton provides advice for supporting others who may be struggling, including extending invitations and being sensitive to their needs.
  • Permission for difference: Readers are encouraged to create a different kind of Christmas if needed, focusing on what feels healing or meaningful.

10. What does Beth Kempton recommend for the period between Christmas and New Year, known as "the Hush"?

  • Embrace the pause: She describes this time as a liminal, restorative period ideal for rest, reflection, and gentle activities.
  • Savor simple pleasures: Suggestions include spending time in nature, digital detox, creative projects, and connecting with loved ones in relaxed ways.
  • Reflect on the year: The book provides prompts for reviewing what worked and what didn’t during Christmas, and for mapping the past year’s experiences.
  • Prepare for the future: Use this time to set intentions and gently plan for the year ahead, rather than rushing into resolutions.

11. How does "Calm Christmas and a Happy New Year" by Beth Kempton guide readers in setting intentions and planning for the New Year?

  • Rejects harsh resolutions: Kempton advises against rigid New Year’s resolutions, favoring gentle visioning and nurturing rituals.
  • Dream Development Process: She introduces a six-step process for acknowledging dreams, assessing progress, and aligning actions with natural rhythms and seasons.
  • Focus on authenticity: The book encourages readers to pursue dreams that are truly meaningful to them, not just what they think they should want.
  • Leave space for magic: Planning includes intentionally leaving open time for unexpected opportunities and self-care.

12. What are the best quotes from "Calm Christmas and a Happy New Year" by Beth Kempton, and what do they mean?

  • “This book is for life, not just for Christmas.” – The lessons and practices are meant to enrich your whole life, not just the holiday season.
  • “Christmas is at once almost universally recognized and intensely individual.” – While many celebrate Christmas, each person’s experience and meaning is unique.
  • “Letting go of the notion of the perfect Christmas is not about lowering your expectations, but changing them.” – True joy comes from embracing imperfection and authenticity.
  • “Simplicity, generosity, delight, and belonging are the true touchstones of festive joy.” – The heart of Christmas lies in simple pleasures and genuine connection, not extravagance.
  • “All of life is a story… This is the story of your life, my friend. Live it fully. Write it well.” – The book encourages readers to be the authors of their own meaningful, joyful lives, at Christmas and beyond.

Review Summary

4.08 out of 5
Average of 1.3K ratings from Goodreads and Amazon.

Calm Christmas and a Happy New Year receives praise for its guidance on creating a less stressful holiday season. Readers appreciate the book's focus on mindfulness, self-reflection, and reconnecting with what truly matters during Christmas. Many find the journal prompts and questions helpful for personal growth. Some readers mention the book's impact on coping with loss or changing family dynamics. While a few expected more festive content, most reviewers found the book's approach to simplifying and finding meaning in the holiday season valuable and inspiring.

Your rating:
4.46
33 ratings

About the Author

Beth Kempton is a bestselling self-help author and Japanologist with two degrees in Japanese. She has spent years living and working in Japan, studying various traditional arts and crafts. Beth Kempton's books have been translated into 24 languages, and she specializes in uncovering life lessons from Japanese culture and philosophy. A qualified yoga teacher and Reiki Master, Beth lives in Devon, England, with her two daughters. She is known for her books on Japanese wisdom, including "Wabi Sabi" and her upcoming work "Kokoro: Japanese wisdom for a life well-lived." Beth's writing focuses on personal growth, mindfulness, and applying Japanese concepts to everyday life.

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