Discourses and Selected Writings

1. Focus on what you can control: Your thoughts, judgments, and actions

"We are responsible for some things, while there are others for which we cannot be held responsible."

Master your mind. The cornerstone of Stoic philosophy is the distinction between what is within our control and what is not. We have power over our thoughts, judgments, desires, and actions. Everything else - including our body, possessions, reputation, and the actions of others - is beyond our direct control.

Redirect your energy. By focusing on what we can influence, we free ourselves from unnecessary anxiety and frustration. Instead of worrying about external events, we can channel our energy into improving our character, making virtuous choices, and responding wisely to circumstances.

Things within our control:

• Our opinions and beliefs
• Our desires and aversions
• Our voluntary actions

Things outside our control:

• Other people's actions and opinions
• Natural events and phenomena
• Past events and future outcomes

2. Align your desires with nature and reason to achieve tranquility

"Don't hope that events will turn out the way you want, welcome events in whichever way they happen: this is the path to peace."

Embrace reality. True happiness comes from aligning our desires with the natural order of the universe. By accepting things as they are, rather than wishing for them to be different, we eliminate the gap between expectation and reality - the source of much human suffering.

Cultivate rational desires. Our desires should be guided by reason and virtue, not by fleeting emotions or societal pressures. By wanting only what is truly good for us and within our power to achieve, we set ourselves up for contentment and peace of mind.

• Align your will with nature's laws
• Desire what is virtuous and reasonable
• Accept outcomes with equanimity
• Find joy in doing what is right, not in getting what you want

3. Cultivate virtue and character over external possessions or status

"I cannot call somebody 'hard-working' knowing only that they read and write. Even if 'all night long' is added, I cannot say it – not until I know the focus of all this energy."

Prioritize inner worth. True value lies in our character, not in external possessions or achievements. Virtue - comprising wisdom, justice, courage, and self-control - is the only true good and the key to a fulfilling life.

Develop excellence of character. Instead of chasing wealth, fame, or pleasure, focus on becoming a person of integrity, compassion, and wisdom. This inner development is entirely within our control and provides lasting satisfaction.

Virtues to cultivate:

• Wisdom (practical knowledge of good and evil)
• Justice (fairness in dealings with others)
• Courage (facing challenges with fortitude)
• Self-control (mastery over desires and impulses)

4. Practice self-discipline and moderation in all aspects of life

"It shows a lack of refinement to spend a lot of time exercising, eating, drinking, defecating or copulating. Tending to the body's needs should be done incidentally, as it were; the mind and its functions require the bulk of our attention."

Master your impulses. Self-discipline is crucial for living a virtuous and fulfilling life. By exercising restraint over our desires and impulses, we gain freedom from their tyranny and cultivate inner strength.

Seek the middle path. Moderation in all things - from food and drink to emotions and ambitions - leads to balance and harmony. Excess in any form often leads to suffering and loss of self-control.

• Practice temperance in eating and drinking
• Control emotional reactions
• Balance work and leisure
• Cultivate healthy habits without obsession
• Avoid extremes in thought and action

5. Embrace challenges as opportunities for growth and self-improvement

"The true man is revealed in difficult times. So when trouble comes, think of yourself as a wrestler whom God, like a trainer, has paired with a tough young buck. For what purpose? To turn you into Olympic-class material."

Welcome adversity. Difficulties and obstacles are not misfortunes, but opportunities to exercise and strengthen our virtues. By facing challenges with courage and wisdom, we grow stronger and more resilient.

Reframe hardships. Instead of complaining about problems, view them as tests of character and chances to practice philosophy. Every setback is a chance to cultivate patience, fortitude, and wisdom.

Ways to grow through challenges:

• Practice endurance in physical discomfort
• Cultivate patience when facing delays or frustrations
• Exercise courage in the face of fear or uncertainty
• Develop problem-solving skills when confronted with obstacles
• Learn humility and adaptability when plans go awry

6. Develop resilience by accepting what you cannot change

"Sickness is a problem for the body, not the mind – unless the mind decides that it is a problem. Lameness, too, is the body's problem, not the mind's."

Cultivate acceptance. Resilience comes from accepting reality as it is, not as we wish it to be. By recognizing what is beyond our control and focusing on our response, we maintain inner peace regardless of external circumstances.

Practice the art of acquiescence. Learn to willingly accept and even embrace the inevitable challenges and changes of life. This doesn't mean passive resignation, but rather an active choice to align our will with the natural order of things.

• Distinguish between what you can and cannot change
• Focus on your response rather than external events
• Find opportunities for growth in every situation
• Cultivate equanimity in the face of adversity
• Practice gratitude for what you have, rather than lamenting what you lack

7. Live according to your principles, not others' expectations

"It is just charming how people boast about qualities beyond their control. For instance, 'I am better than you because I have many estates, while you are practically starving'; or, 'I'm a consul,' 'I'm a governor,' or 'I have fine curly hair.'"

Define your own values. True freedom comes from living according to your own principles, not societal expectations or fleeting desires. Develop a clear understanding of what truly matters to you and let that guide your actions.

Ignore external judgments. Don't be swayed by the opinions or criticisms of others. Your worth is determined by your character and actions, not by how others perceive you or what possessions you have.

Steps to live authentically:

• Clarify your core values and principles
• Make decisions based on your beliefs, not others' expectations
• Practice integrity by aligning your actions with your words
• Resist peer pressure and societal norms that conflict with your values
• Cultivate inner validation rather than seeking external approval

8. Pursue wisdom and self-knowledge through continuous learning

"The beginning of philosophy is an awareness of one's own mental fitness."

Embrace lifelong learning. True wisdom comes from continuous self-examination and the pursuit of knowledge. Never stop questioning your beliefs, challenging your assumptions, and expanding your understanding.

Know thyself. Self-knowledge is the foundation of all wisdom. Regularly examine your thoughts, motivations, and actions to gain a deeper understanding of yourself and your place in the world.

• Practice daily self-reflection
• Engage in philosophical discussions and debates
• Read widely and critically
• Apply philosophical principles to daily life
• Seek out diverse perspectives and experiences

9. Cultivate meaningful relationships based on mutual respect and virtue

"Whoever chafes at the conditions dealt by fate is unskilled in the art of life; whoever bears with them nobly and makes wise use of the results is a man who deserves to be considered good."

Build virtuous connections. True friendship is based on mutual respect, shared values, and the pursuit of virtue. Cultivate relationships that support your growth and encourage you to be your best self.

Practice benevolence. Treat others with kindness and respect, recognizing our shared humanity. Even when dealing with difficult people, maintain your own integrity and compassion.

Keys to meaningful relationships:

• Seek friends who share your values and inspire growth
• Practice active listening and empathy
• Be reliable and trustworthy
• Offer support without expectation of return
• Maintain healthy boundaries
• Address conflicts with wisdom and patience

10. Find freedom in detachment from external circumstances

"He is free who lives as he wishes to live; who is neither subject to compulsion nor to hindrance, nor to force; whose movements to action are not impeded, whose desires attain their purpose, and who does not fall into that which he would avoid."

Cultivate inner freedom. True freedom comes from within, not from external circumstances. By detaching our happiness from things outside our control, we become immune to the whims of fortune and find lasting peace.

Practice voluntary discomfort. Regularly challenge yourself with small discomforts to build resilience and reduce dependence on external comforts. This prepares you to face larger challenges with equanimity.

• Periodically abstain from luxuries
• Practice gratitude for what you have
• Visualize losing possessions or status
• Find contentment in simplicity
• Develop self-sufficiency in thought and action

Last updated: January 22, 2025