Influence

1. Reciprocity: The powerful urge to repay what we've received

"The imposition of the rule for reciprocation upon us all may well have important survival value for human culture."

Evolutionary advantage. The rule of reciprocity – feeling obligated to return favors – has been a cornerstone of human societies for millennia. It allowed for the division of labor, exchange of diverse resources, and fostered interdependence. This deeply ingrained principle is so powerful that unasked-for favors often trigger a sense of indebtedness.

Exploited for compliance. Marketers and compliance professionals leverage this rule through various tactics:

• Free samples
• The "that's-not-all" technique (adding bonuses after initial price)
• Reciprocal concessions (starting with a larger request, then retreating)

The desire to reciprocate can lead us to agree to requests we might otherwise decline. Being aware of this tendency can help us make more conscious decisions when faced with offers or favors.

2. Commitment and Consistency: We strive to align with our past actions

"Once we have made a choice or taken a stand, we will encounter personal and interpersonal pressures to behave consistently with that commitment."

Psychological need. Humans have a strong desire to be and appear consistent in their attitudes, words, and actions. This drive stems from the personal and social value placed on consistency – it's associated with personal and intellectual strength.

Compliance tactics. This principle is often exploited through:

• Foot-in-the-door technique (starting with a small request)
• Public commitments (written statements, signatures)
• Lowballing (adding hidden costs after initial agreement)

To guard against manipulation, focus on the merit of current choices rather than blind consistency with past decisions. Ask yourself: "Knowing what I know now, if I could go back in time, would I make the same choice again?"

3. Social Proof: We look to others to guide our behavior

"We view a behavior as more correct in a given situation to the degree that we see others performing it."

Uncertainty and similarity. Social proof is most powerful in two conditions:

1. Uncertainty: When we're unsure about how to act
2. Similarity: When we observe the behavior of people like us

Real-world impact. This principle influences various aspects of our lives:

• Consumer behavior (popularity signals in advertising)
• Emergency situations (bystander effect)
• Entertainment (laugh tracks on TV shows)

To resist undue influence, be aware of artificially created social proof (like canned laughter) and remember that the actions of others may not always reflect the best course of action for you.

4. Liking: We say yes to people we like

"Few people would be surprised to learn that, as a rule, we most prefer to say yes to the requests of someone we know and like."

Factors of liking. Several elements contribute to our liking of others:

• Physical attractiveness
• Similarity (in opinions, background, lifestyle)
• Compliments
• Familiarity and cooperation
• Association with positive things

Compliance strategies. Salespeople and marketers use these factors to increase liking:

• Mirroring and matching body language
• Finding commonalities with customers
• Using flattery (even if insincere)
• Creating a sense of cooperation ("I'm on your side")

To defend against manipulation, separate your feelings about a requester from the merits of their request. Ask yourself: "If I didn't like this person, would I still want to comply with their request?"

5. Authority: We defer to experts and positions of power

"In the presence of authority pressure, we often become mindless conformers."

Automatic deference. From childhood, we're taught to obey authority figures. This tendency to comply with authorities can lead to both positive outcomes (social order) and negative consequences (blind obedience to harmful directives).

Symbols of authority. People often respond to the mere symbols of authority rather than actual expertise:

• Titles (e.g., Doctor, Professor)
• Clothing (uniforms, business attire)
• Trappings (luxury cars, expensive accessories)

To resist undue influence from authority:

1. Ask: "Is this authority truly an expert in this specific situation?"
2. Consider: "How truthful can we expect this expert to be here?"

By questioning the relevance and motives of authority figures, we can make more informed decisions.

6. Scarcity: We want what's rare or dwindling in availability

"The way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost."

Psychological reactance. Scarcity often triggers a strong emotional response, stemming from our aversion to losing freedoms or opportunities. This reaction can cloud our judgment about the true value of an item or opportunity.

Compliance tactics using scarcity:

• Limited-number offers
• Deadlines
• Exclusive information
• Competition for resources

To defend against scarcity-based manipulation:

1. Recognize the emotional arousal triggered by scarcity
2. Assess the item's true value to you, independent of its availability
3. Remember: Scarce items aren't necessarily better in quality or more suitable for your needs

7. Weapons of Influence: Automatic patterns that can be exploited

"Very often in making a decision about someone or something, we don't use all the relevant available information; we use, instead, only a single, highly representative piece of the total."

Mental shortcuts. In our complex world, we often rely on automatic decision-making patterns to cope with information overload. These shortcuts are generally beneficial but can be exploited by compliance professionals.

Key weapons of influence:

• Reciprocity
• Commitment and Consistency
• Social Proof
• Liking
• Authority
• Scarcity

To protect yourself:

1. Recognize when these principles are being used
2. Consider whether the influence attempt is genuine or manipulative
3. Respond based on the true merits of the situation, not the automatic trigger

8. Contrast Principle: How relative differences affect our perceptions

"The contrast principle is well established in the field of psychophysics and applies to all sorts of perceptions besides weight."

Perceptual bias. We tend to perceive things not in absolute terms, but in comparison to a reference point. This principle affects our judgments of physical and social stimuli.

Applications:

• Sales (showing expensive items first)
• Negotiations (starting with an extreme position)
• Self-perception (comparing ourselves to others)

Examples:

• A $100 accessory seems inexpensive after looking at $1000 suits
• Lukewarm water feels hot after cold water, cold after hot water

Being aware of this principle can help us make more objective judgments and resist manipulation in various contexts.

9. Rejection-then-Retreat: The effectiveness of concessions

"The requester's concession within the technique not only causes targets to say yes more often, it also causes them to feel more responsible for having 'dictated' the final agreement."

Reciprocal concessions. When someone makes a concession to us, we feel pressure to reciprocate. This principle is exploited in the "rejection-then-retreat" or "door-in-the-face" technique.

How it works:

1. Make a large, likely-to-be-rejected request
2. Follow with a smaller request (the one you actually want)
3. The smaller request is more likely to be accepted due to the perceived concession

This technique is effective because:

• It triggers reciprocity
• It invokes the contrast principle
• It increases the target's feeling of responsibility for the agreement

To defend against this tactic, evaluate each request on its own merits, regardless of preceding requests.

10. Psychological Reactance: Why we resist limitations on our freedom

"Whenever free choice is limited or threatened, the need to retain our freedoms makes us desire them (as well as the goods and services associated with them) significantly more than previously."

Freedom and defiance. People have a strong aversion to perceived limitations on their freedom of choice. When freedoms are threatened, we often desire them more intensely.

Implications:

• "Forbidden fruit" effect in social situations
• Censorship often increases desire for censored information
• The "Romeo and Juliet effect" in romantic relationships

To avoid reactance-based decisions:

1. Recognize when your desire stems from a threat to freedom
2. Evaluate the merits of a choice independent of restrictions
3. Consider whether the limitation is genuine or merely perceived

11. Defending Against Compliance Tactics: Recognizing and countering influence attempts

"The only protection we have against these weapons of influence is awareness of how they work and conscious resistance against their use."

Vigilance and countermeasures. While influence techniques are powerful, understanding them provides a defense against manipulation.

Strategies for resisting undue influence:

1. Recognize automatic influence triggers
2. Consider whether the influence attempt is genuine or manipulative
3. Reframe the situation if you detect an illegitimate influence attempt
4. Focus on the true merits of a proposal, not peripheral factors
5. Be willing to walk away or delay decisions when feeling pressured

Remember: The goal isn't to resist all influence (which can be positive), but to make conscious, informed decisions rather than automatic responses to triggers.

Last updated: January 22, 2025