Lily Dale

1. Lily Dale: A Unique Community Built on Talking to the Dead

For more than a hundred years, people of the Dale have believed they can talk with the dead.

A Spiritualist outpost. Lily Dale, New York, is the world's largest community of Spiritualists, founded in 1879. This small village, nestled by a lake, is home to a few hundred residents who cling to the belief that communication with the deceased is possible and accessible to anyone. During the summer season, its population swells with visitors seeking readings and workshops.

Historical roots. Spiritualism began in 1848 with the Fox sisters and their rapping sounds, which they claimed were from a spirit. Despite later confessions of fraud, the movement gained millions of followers, especially after major tragedies like World War I and the 1918 flu pandemic fueled a desire for contact with lost loved ones. Lily Dale became a central hub for this faith.

Enduring belief. Despite widespread skepticism and historical exposures of fraud, the core belief persists in Lily Dale: "There is no death and there are no dead." Residents believe the soul lives on and can communicate, offering comfort and proof of an afterlife. This conviction remains strong within the community.

2. Skepticism Meets the Supernatural in Lily Dale

Compared to most people in Lily Dale, I was a raging skeptic. Compared to most of my colleagues, I was a soft-headed sap.

Initial journalistic stance. The author, a religion reporter, arrived in Lily Dale with a professional skepticism, viewing the community's claims as absurd but intriguing. Her goal was to understand why people believed and how these beliefs affected their lives, rather than to debunk or convert. She was open to the possibility of cosmic workings but doubted direct communication with the dead.

Challenging assumptions. The author's ambivalence placed her between the fervent believers of Lily Dale and her more cynical journalistic peers. She admired the Spiritualists' "pluck" in holding onto their miraculous claims in a scientific age. Her personal history, including a childhood religious experience and later education away from faith, left her uncommonly open to exploring bizarre religious practices.

Seeking the story. The author's primary questions were: Do they really believe it? How does it affect their lives? A third, personal question lingered: How would such belief change me? This curiosity, stemming from a muffled longing for "Big God ideas," drove her three-year investigation into the mysteries of Lily Dale.

3. Mediums: Channels, Guessers, or Something More?

Skeptics often say mediums get their messages by picking up nonverbal cues and unconscious hints. I don’t think so.

Modern mediumship. Today's Lily Dale mediums operate in well-lit parlors, eschewing the trances, spirit cabinets, and physical manifestations of the past. They speak in normal voices, relying on inner visions, feelings, or voices perceived mentally. Public message services involve mediums scanning crowds and offering messages, often using vague language or common themes.

Debate over authenticity. The community itself debates the skill and authenticity of its mediums. While some pass rigorous tests to be registered, others are seen as politically favored or simply not genuinely connected to the spirit world. Critics point to "cold reading" techniques, while mediums insist they are merely "telephones" for spirits.

Beyond simple fraud. The author observed that many mediums seemed genuinely vague or awkward in normal conversation, suggesting their insights might not come from clever social observation. While acknowledging historical and present-day fraud, the author, like William James, considered the possibility that even amidst fakery, there might be "something real" happening, perhaps a tapping into unknown forms of consciousness.

4. Grief, Loss, and the Search for Connection

What hasn’t changed is Lily Dale’s attraction for the bereaved.

Comfort for the grieving. Lily Dale draws many people seeking solace after the death of loved ones, especially parents who have lost children or spouses. They come hoping for a sign, a message, or proof that their loved ones are still present and happy. The pain of their grief, whether fresh or long-held, is palpable.

Messages of reassurance. Mediums often provide messages aimed at comforting the bereaved, assuring them that their loved ones are "in spirit," happy, and aware of their lives on the earth plane. Examples include:

• A mother told her son was "here" and approved of her life choices.
• A widow receiving specific, personal details about her late husband's habits and wishes.
• Spirits bringing tokens or familiar scents to identify themselves.

Grief's enduring power. Despite the Spiritualist belief that "there is no death," grief remains a powerful emotion in Lily Dale. Even strong believers like Bonnie Mikula experienced crushing sorrow after losing her partner, demonstrating that visions and voices, while comforting, are not a substitute for the physical presence of a loved one.

5. Personal Encounters That Challenged Doubt

No one else could have known those things, Carol said.

Specific, unexplainable details. The author recounts several instances where mediums provided information that seemed impossible to know through normal means. Carol Lucas, a skeptical widow, was deeply moved when two different mediums independently mentioned her husband's near-death experience months before his actual death, a detail she had forgotten.

Beyond coincidence. Pat Naulty, a professor grieving her son, was stunned when a visiting medium mentioned her deceased mother by name and spoke of her approval of Pat's career, followed by a description of her son, John, including his height and a baseball cap. Later, another medium confirmed details of a private ceremony Pat held for John, including a song and eulogy, which no one else knew about.

Defying rationalization. These specific, verifiable details, seemingly unknown to the sitters or easily obtainable, began to chip away at the author's rational explanations. While some messages were vague or incorrect, these precise hits, particularly those corroborated by multiple mediums or unknown to the sitter, became harder to dismiss as mere guesswork or cold reading.

6. The Blend of the Mundane and the Mystical

Much of Lily Dale makes me roll my eyes, but I am not alone.

Everyday absurdity. Lily Dale is a place where the extraordinary coexists with the utterly ordinary and sometimes absurd. Alongside claims of spirit communication, energy vortexes, and angelic encounters, there are mundane realities like peeling paint, muddy streets, community gossip, and debates over real estate. This blend can be jarring for visitors.

Tatty charm. The community's lack of polish and commercial slickness, while off-putting to some, gave the author a sense of ease. It felt "freer," less bound by conventional rules and expectations. This unvarnished quality contrasted sharply with the grand claims of spiritual power, creating a unique atmosphere.

Shared skepticism. Interestingly, residents themselves often possess a degree of skepticism, particularly regarding the claims of others. They have "eye-rolling thresholds" and debate the authenticity of various phenomena, from floating trumpets to spirit paintings. This internal critique adds another layer to the community's complex reality, suggesting not everyone accepts every claim blindly.

7. The Power of Belief, Even Amidst Contradiction

If you don’t have the faith, it doesn’t matter what happens. You won’t be convinced.

Faith's resilience. The author observes that belief in Lily Dale persists despite historical fraud, inconsistent messages, and lack of scientific proof. Skeptics find what they expect (nonsense), and believers find affirmation. For many, the experience is less about irrefutable proof and more about playing with intriguing notions or finding comfort.

Beyond facts. The author notes that religious belief often transcends factual verification. Like the Taiwanese cult awaiting God on television, believers can reinterpret events to fit their faith. In Lily Dale, inconsistencies are explained away (mediums have off days, spirits are confused, free will changes the future), and the focus remains on the positive impact of the belief itself.

The heart of faith. The author finds that the most compelling aspect of belief is not the certainty it proclaims, but the underlying doubt and the personal meaning derived. When believers reveal their struggles and uncertainties, their faith seems more authentic and powerful. The question becomes not "Is it true?" but "How does this belief sustain and transform them?"

8. Beyond the Rational Mind: Intuition and Energy

James thought the brain might be a "temporary and partial transmitter of cosmic consciousness into individual consciousness."

Alternative ways of knowing. The book explores ideas that challenge purely rational understanding, drawing on figures like William James and Carl Jung. Concepts discussed include:

• Cosmic consciousness: A larger awareness potentially accessible to individuals.
• Intuition/PSI: Knowledge gained through non-sensory means.
• Energy: A pervasive force that mediums and healers interact with.
• Synchronicity: Meaningful coincidences suggesting an underlying order.

Experiences defying logic. The author encounters numerous stories of phenomena that don't fit a rational worldview, such as:

• Precognitive dreams and sudden "knowings."
• Feeling the presence of spirits or sensing their emotions.
• Objects moving or lights flickering without physical cause.
• Healings attributed to channeling energy.

The limits of rationality. The author grapples with the idea that her own rational mind might be a barrier to experiencing these phenomena. Some suggest that letting go of skepticism and focusing on feeling or intuition is necessary to perceive the "thin place" where the spiritual and physical worlds meet.

9. The Author's Unexpected Transformation

What began as a quick story turned into something bigger. I would spend three years of my life plumbing the mysteries of Lily Dale. I never intended for any of it to change me. But it did.

A shift in perspective. The author's prolonged immersion in Lily Dale, initially for a journalistic project, led to an unforeseen personal transformation. Despite her skepticism, the cumulative effect of stories, encounters, and the community's unique atmosphere began to alter her worldview.

Easing up. A turning point came when the author, frustrated by research obstacles, playfully adopted the idea that spirit guides were helping her. This led to a noticeable easing of her anxiety and a surprising improvement in her ability to get interviews and information. This experience, whether due to genuine spiritual aid or a shift in her own mindset, demonstrated the power of adopting a different belief system.

Redefining self. Encounters with mediums, particularly Lauren Thibodeau's message about men from her past, forced the author to re-examine her own life narrative. Challenging her long-held identity as a "victim of love," the message suggested a different, more positive reality, prompting introspection and a potential shift in self-perception.

10. The "White Crow": Evidence That Defied Explanation

You only have to see one white crow to know that not all crows are black, wrote William James.

Seeking undeniable proof. Like William James, who sought a single instance of psychic phenomena that couldn't be explained away, the author looked for her "white crow" in Lily Dale – a piece of evidence so compelling it would force her to reconsider her rational framework.

Sherry Lee's reading. The author's reading with medium Sherry Lee Calkins provided this pivotal experience. Despite some inaccuracies and vague statements, Sherry Lee provided several specific, verifiable facts about the author's deceased grandfather and her husband's past near-death experiences that the author was certain the medium could not have known through normal means.

Beyond coincidence or fraud. These specific hits, particularly those about details unknown to the author herself, defied easy rationalization as guesswork, cold reading, or prior research. While the author didn't fully embrace the explanation that spirits provided the information, these instances served as undeniable data points that challenged her purely materialistic view of reality.

11. The Ongoing Tension Between Faith and Doubt

The truths of Lily Dale had only partially convinced me, I guess, because it didn’t take much to send me scurrying back to consensus reality.

Oscillating between belief and skepticism. The author's journey was not a linear progression from doubt to faith, but rather an oscillation. Moments of profound impact and seemingly undeniable evidence were often followed by encounters with absurdity, inconsistency, or practices that triggered her skepticism anew, such as the table tipping or materialization class.

The comfort of consensus reality. Despite glimpses of a potentially more wondrous universe, the author found herself repeatedly retreating to the familiar, predictable world of verifiable facts and shared understanding. This suggests that embracing the mysteries of Lily Dale requires not just evidence, but a willingness to let go of the security of rational consensus.

Lingering questions. The book concludes with the author still grappling with the implications of her experiences. While not fully converted to Spiritualism, she is left with lingering questions about the nature of reality, consciousness, and the potential for connection beyond the physical world. The journey changed her, leaving her more open to possibility, even as doubt remains a constant companion.

Last updated: June 12, 2025