My Story

1. Elizabeth Smart's abduction: A harrowing nine-month ordeal begins

"I have a knife to your neck," he whispered. "Don't make a sound. Get out of bed, or I'll kill you and your family."

A nightmare begins. On June 5, 2002, 14-year-old Elizabeth Smart was abducted from her bedroom in Salt Lake City, Utah, by Brian David Mitchell. Accompanied by his wife, Wanda Barzee, Mitchell forced Elizabeth to hike to a remote campsite in the mountains. The abduction marked the beginning of a nine-month ordeal filled with physical, emotional, and sexual abuse.

The abductors. Brian David Mitchell, a self-proclaimed prophet, had carefully planned the kidnapping. He and Barzee believed they were fulfilling a divine mission to take seven wives. Elizabeth was to be the first of these wives. Mitchell used religious manipulation, threats, and violence to control Elizabeth throughout her captivity.

2. Survival instinct: Elizabeth's determination to live and return home

Whatever it takes to survive!

Will to live. Despite the horrific circumstances, Elizabeth made a conscious decision to survive her ordeal. She recognized that her captors might outlive her parents, but she could potentially outlive them. This realization became a source of hope and motivation for Elizabeth to endure the daily abuses and hardships.

Adapting to survive. Elizabeth learned to comply with her captors' demands to avoid further harm to herself or threats to her family. She adapted her behavior to minimize conflict and maximize her chances of survival. This included participating in religious rituals, wearing disguises, and following Mitchell's instructions when interacting with the public.

3. The power of faith: Finding strength in spirituality during captivity

I have learned an important lesson. Yes, God can make some good come from evil. But even He, in all His majesty, won't make the evil go away.

Spiritual resilience. Throughout her captivity, Elizabeth maintained her faith in God. She believed that her grandfather, who had passed away shortly before her abduction, was watching over her as a guardian angel. This spiritual connection provided comfort and strength during her darkest moments.

Finding meaning. Elizabeth's faith helped her make sense of her suffering and maintain hope for eventual rescue. She experienced what she believed were divine interventions, such as the miraculous appearance of water when she was severely dehydrated. These experiences reinforced her belief that she was not abandoned and that her ordeal would eventually end.

4. Manipulation and control: Brian David Mitchell's tactics of fear and intimidation

"If you ever try to run, I'm going to kill you," he would hiss into my ear, his dry breath raising the hair on my neck.

Psychological warfare. Mitchell employed various tactics to maintain control over Elizabeth:

• Constant threats of violence against her and her family
• Religious manipulation, claiming divine authority for his actions
• Isolation from the outside world
• Forced alcohol and drug consumption
• Sexual abuse and degradation

Breaking spirit and identity. Mitchell attempted to erase Elizabeth's identity by:

• Giving her a new name: Shearjashub
• Forcing her to wear robes and veils in public
• Prohibiting her from speaking to others
• Indoctrinating her with his twisted religious beliefs

5. The impact of trauma: Psychological effects of long-term captivity

I felt like I was nothing but a shell.

Psychological adaptation. Elizabeth experienced various psychological effects due to her prolonged captivity:

• Dissociation as a coping mechanism
• Constant fear and hypervigilance
• Loss of self-worth and identity
• Feelings of helplessness and despair

Stockholm Syndrome misconceptions. Despite popular belief, Elizabeth did not develop Stockholm Syndrome. She never formed emotional attachments to her captors or sympathized with their cause. Her compliance was a survival strategy, not a result of emotional bonding.

6. Failed opportunities for rescue: The challenges of identifying a kidnapped victim

I stared at him, dumbfounded. So he was going to allow me to go into the city all the time now? I almost shrugged. Stay here; go into the city; either way I couldn't run.

Public encounters. Despite being taken into public spaces, Elizabeth was not immediately recognized due to:

• Disguises, including robes, veils, and wigs
• Mitchell's ability to manipulate and deceive others
• Elizabeth's fear-induced silence when questioned by strangers or authorities

Near misses. There were several instances where Elizabeth came close to being rescued:

• A librarian in Salt Lake City called the police, suspecting Elizabeth's identity
• A man in San Diego called authorities after seeing the group
• Numerous encounters with well-meaning strangers who sensed something was wrong but didn't intervene

7. The journey to freedom: Elizabeth's return to Utah and eventual rescue

I Am Elizabeth

Return to Utah. After months in California, Elizabeth convinced Mitchell to return to Utah, hoping for a chance at rescue. The journey back was perilous, involving:

• Hitchhiking across the desert
• Close encounters with law enforcement
• Increasing paranoia and agitation from Mitchell

The rescue. On March 12, 2003, Elizabeth was finally rescued in Sandy, Utah. Key factors in her rescue included:

• Multiple police officers confronting the group
• Persistent questioning by officers who sensed something was wrong
• A gentle approach that made Elizabeth feel safe enough to reveal her identity

8. Healing and resilience: Elizabeth's path to recovery and advocacy

I never once—not for a single moment—developed a shred of affection or empathy for either one of them. There was no traumatic bonding. No emotional ties. The only thing there ever was was fear, and never anything else.

Reclaiming life. After her rescue, Elizabeth faced the challenge of rebuilding her life and identity. She focused on:

• Reconnecting with her family and friends
• Continuing her education
• Addressing the psychological impact of her trauma through therapy and support

Advocacy work. Elizabeth transformed her experience into a platform for advocacy:

• Speaking out about child abduction and sexual abuse
• Promoting safety education and prevention programs
• Supporting other survivors of trauma and abuse

Last updated: January 22, 2025