Key Takeaways
1. Traditional Networking Is Ineffective and Time-Consuming
"Networking events are like nightclubs, because most people there are just looking for a professional one-night stand."
Time-wasting rituals. Traditional networking events often lead to superficial connections and wasted time. Attendees typically focus on their personal agendas, whether it's signing up new clients or creating awareness for their business. This "every person for themselves" mentality results in shallow interactions and rarely leads to meaningful professional relationships.
Misaligned expectations. Many professionals attend these events with unrealistic expectations of instant gratification, using poor metrics like the number of business cards collected or potential leads engaged. This approach overlooks the importance of building long-term, mutually beneficial relationships. Moreover, the most successful and desirable connections are often absent from these events, as they are too busy managing their thriving businesses.
Inefficient use of resources. Attending numerous networking events can consume a significant amount of time and energy that could be better spent on servicing existing clients or developing more strategic relationships. The return on investment for traditional networking is often poor, with countless hours spent for minimal meaningful results.
2. Shift Focus from Collecting Contacts to Creating Value
"Networking: any activity that increases the value of your network and/or the value you contribute to it."
Redefine networking. Instead of focusing on accumulating contacts, shift your perspective to creating and providing value within your professional network. This approach involves identifying ways to help others succeed and solve their problems, rather than solely seeking personal gain.
Adopt a long-term mindset. Building meaningful relationships takes time and patience. Focus on developing connections that can lead to mutually beneficial partnerships over the long term, rather than seeking immediate results or transactions.
Become a connector. Strive to become a valuable resource by connecting people within your network who can benefit from each other's expertise or services. This approach positions you as a trusted advisor and increases your value to others in your professional circle.
3. Become the Ultimate Tiebreaker and Resource for Clients
"If I was already adding this kind of value to my clients' portfolios and their businesses, how much more could I create if I actually made it a priority by weaving it into my suite of services and bolstering my value proposition?"
Differentiate yourself. In today's competitive business landscape, it's crucial to set yourself apart from competitors. One powerful way to do this is by becoming an invaluable resource for your clients beyond your core services.
Expand your value proposition. Actively seek ways to add value to your clients' businesses by:
- Referring potential clients or opportunities to them
- Connecting them with other high-quality professionals in your network
- Providing resources and solutions outside your primary area of expertise
Build loyalty and retention. By consistently going above and beyond for your clients, you create a strong incentive for them to remain loyal to your services. This approach can effectively eliminate competition and position you as an indispensable partner in their success.
4. Identify and Nurture High-Quality Professional Relationships
"The success that comes out of any professional group correlates directly with how similar the quality and intentions are of the professionals within that group."
Selective networking. Focus on developing relationships with professionals who share your values, work ethic, and approach to business. Look for individuals who are genuinely interested in mutual growth and collaboration rather than those solely focused on personal gain.
Vetting process. Develop a system for evaluating potential connections based on:
- The quality of their business and reputation
- Their ability and willingness to help others
- Alignment with your ideal client profile
- Shared values and business philosophy
Nurture key relationships. Invest time and effort in deepening connections with the most valuable members of your network. Regularly engage with them, offer support, and seek ways to collaborate or add value to their businesses.
5. Host Strategic, Curated Networking Events
"Used effectively, events—the ones you host, and the ones you attend—can become a major factor in your success."
Create exclusive gatherings. Organize small, curated events that bring together high-quality professionals from your network. These events should focus on fostering meaningful connections and providing value to attendees.
Design purposeful interactions. Structure your events to facilitate:
- Introductions between complementary professionals
- Sharing of expertise and insights
- Opportunities for collaboration and mutual support
Follow-up and facilitation. Take an active role in following up after events to ensure valuable connections are maintained and potential collaborations are realized. This approach solidifies your position as a valuable connector and resource.
6. Leverage Technology to Maintain Meaningful Connections
"Even if you're good at staying in touch with all of your important clients and contacts, it's unlikely your fellow networkers are as organized."
Utilize relationship management tools. Implement systems and technologies to help you stay organized and maintain regular contact with your network. Some useful tools include:
- SaneBox for email management and follow-ups
- Contactually for scheduling regular check-ins
- Newsle for tracking news and updates about your contacts
Create online communities. Establish dedicated online spaces for your network to interact, share information, and stay connected between in-person events. This can include private groups on platforms like LinkedIn, Facebook, or a custom-built community site.
Automate strategically. Use automation to streamline routine tasks, such as scheduling follow-ups or sharing relevant content, while maintaining a personal touch in your interactions.
7. Create Opportunities for Reciprocity and Business Growth
"If you spend all of your time focused on helping everyone else, what's in it for you? Well, to be blunt: A hell of a lot!"
Facilitate easy reciprocation. Make it simple for your network to help you by:
- Clearly communicating your ideal client profile and business goals
- Providing email templates for introductions
- Sharing "triggering events" that indicate potential opportunities
Demonstrate expertise. Create and share valuable content through blogs, newsletters, or speaking engagements to establish credibility and keep your network informed about your expertise.
Host client appreciation events. Organize events that add value for existing clients while also creating opportunities to meet potential new clients. These events should:
- Provide enjoyable experiences for attendees
- Offer valuable insights or information related to your field
- Allow for natural relationship-building without overt sales pitches
By focusing on creating value for others and strategically positioning yourself as a valuable resource and connector, you can build a powerful network that naturally generates opportunities for business growth and success.
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FAQ
1. What is "Networking Is Not Working" by Derek Coburn about?
- Reimagining Networking: The book challenges traditional networking methods, arguing that large events and business card exchanges are ineffective for building meaningful professional relationships.
- Un-Networking Approach: Coburn introduces the concept of "un-networking," focusing on creating value-driven, curated groups of professionals who help each other succeed.
- Practical Blueprint: The book provides a step-by-step guide to building a high-quality network, emphasizing quality over quantity and long-term relationship building.
- Personal Experience: Drawing from his own journey as a financial advisor, Coburn shares how shifting his networking strategy led to significant business growth and more fulfilling connections.
2. Why should I read "Networking Is Not Working" by Derek Coburn?
- Breaks Ineffective Habits: If you’re frustrated with traditional networking events and not seeing results, this book offers a proven alternative.
- Actionable Strategies: Coburn provides practical, real-world tactics for building a network that actually delivers value to you and your clients.
- Focus on Value Creation: The book teaches you how to become indispensable to your clients and peers by helping them solve problems and make connections.
- Applicable to Many Professions: Whether you’re a business owner, professional, or connector, the advice is relevant for anyone looking to deepen and leverage their network.
3. What are the key takeaways from "Networking Is Not Working" by Derek Coburn?
- Traditional Networking Fails: Large events and random business card exchanges rarely lead to meaningful or profitable relationships.
- Value-Driven Connections: Focus on increasing the value you provide to your network and the value your network provides to you.
- Curated Groups Work Best: Building a small, carefully selected group of like-minded professionals leads to more opportunities and better relationships.
- Reciprocity and Follow-Up: Ongoing engagement, follow-up, and making it easy for others to help you are essential for sustained networking success.
4. How does Derek Coburn define "networking" in "Networking Is Not Working"?
- Value-Centric Definition: Coburn defines networking as "any activity that increases the value of your network and/or the value you contribute to it."
- Beyond Transactions: It’s not about collecting business cards or immediate gains, but about building long-term, mutually beneficial relationships.
- Focus on Contribution: The emphasis is on what you can do for others, not just what you can get from them.
- Quality Over Quantity: The right connections, not the most connections, are what matter.
5. Why does Derek Coburn believe traditional networking is ineffective?
- Misaligned Agendas: Most attendees at large events are focused on their own needs, leading to shallow, transactional interactions.
- Lack of Follow-Through: Even promising connections often fizzle out due to poor follow-up and lack of genuine interest.
- Time Wasted: The return on investment for time spent at traditional events is low compared to more targeted approaches.
- Networking "Nightclubs": Coburn likens these events to nightclubs, where most people are looking for quick wins rather than lasting relationships.
6. What is the "un-networking" approach advocated in "Networking Is Not Working"?
- Curated Groups: Form small, handpicked groups of high-quality professionals who share your values and are committed to helping each other.
- Ultimate Tiebreaker & Resource: Become indispensable by referring clients to your clients and being a go-to resource for solutions beyond your own expertise.
- Facilitated Connections: Actively connect people within your group, focusing on mutual benefit and trust.
- Long-Term Mindset: Prioritize building deep, ongoing relationships over short-term gains or immediate sales.
7. What is the CONECTOR process in "Networking Is Not Working" and how does it work?
- Acronym for Strategy: CONECTOR stands for Clients, Opening doors, Nucleate, Events, Community, and Triggering Ongoing Reciprocity.
- Clients: Start by identifying and deeply understanding your best clients and their needs.
- Opening Doors: Expand your network by connecting with top professionals who can add value to your clients.
- Nucleate: Become the central hub of your group, carefully curating members and facilitating introductions.
- Events, Community, Reciprocity: Host meaningful events, foster a sense of community, and create systems that encourage ongoing mutual support and referrals.
8. How does Derek Coburn recommend identifying and engaging your best clients in "Networking Is Not Working"?
- Deep Discovery: Learn about your clients’ businesses, personal lives, and what makes them tick beyond surface-level details.
- Triggering Events: Identify "trigger phrases" and events that signal when your services or connections could be valuable to them.
- Client Interviews: Conduct interviews to clarify their ideal clients, challenges, and how you can help them grow.
- Selective Investment: Focus your time and resources on clients who value your advice and share your passions, ensuring mutual benefit.
9. What are the key steps to building a high-quality network according to "Networking Is Not Working"?
- Start with Clients: Begin by serving your best clients and understanding their needs and networks.
- Expand Strategically: Use client recommendations, your existing network, and targeted outreach (e.g., LinkedIn, Twitter) to find top professionals in various fields.
- Vetting Process: Assess potential members for business quality, willingness to help, and alignment with your values.
- Curate and Connect: Form a group of 20-30 remarkable professionals, facilitate introductions, and host regular, meaningful events to deepen relationships.
10. How does "Networking Is Not Working" suggest using events and follow-up to strengthen your network?
- Host Curated Events: Organize small, private lunches or dinners where each attendee shares their story, needs, and how others can help.
- Facilitate Connections: Take detailed notes, manage introductions, and ensure everyone gets value from the event.
- Follow-Up Systems: Use tools like SaneBox and Contactually to track follow-ups and keep relationships active.
- Online Communities: Create dedicated online spaces (e.g., LinkedIn or Facebook groups) for ongoing engagement and support among group members.
11. How does Derek Coburn recommend triggering ongoing reciprocity and referrals in "Networking Is Not Working"?
- Make It Easy: Provide templates and clear instructions so your network can easily introduce you to others.
- Share Triggering Events: Educate your group on the situations and phrases that indicate someone could use your services.
- Host Value-Driven Events: Organize client appreciation events, wine tastings, or awards that encourage clients to bring guests and expand your reach.
- Never Be Pushy: Avoid directly asking for referrals; instead, focus on adding value and letting reciprocity happen organically.
12. What are the best quotes from "Networking Is Not Working" by Derek Coburn and what do they mean?
- "Networking: any activity that increases the value of your network and/or the value you contribute to it." – Redefines networking as a value-driven, not transactional, activity.
- "The difference between a master networker and someone who knows how to swap business cards is this: more wins." – Emphasizes that true networking is about creating ongoing, mutual benefits.
- "Never put your reputation on the line with clients by introducing them to people you don't know much about." – Stresses the importance of trust and careful curation in your network.
- "If you spend all of your time focused on helping everyone else, what’s in it for you? Well, to be blunt: A hell of a lot! If you make it easy for people to help you." – Highlights the power of selfless value creation and the importance of enabling reciprocity.
- "By focusing on your Clients, Opening doors, Nucleating, effectively using Events, fostering Community and Triggering Ongoing Reciprocity, you’ll be able to build an engaged core group of people who do more than network and generate dubious leads." – Summarizes the CONECTOR process and its transformative impact on networking.
Review Summary
Networking Is Not Working receives mixed reviews, with an average rating of 3.56/5. Positive reviewers praise its focus on building meaningful relationships and providing value, while critics find it too specific to high-level financial advising. Some readers appreciate the practical strategies and CONECTOR framework, while others feel the advice is unrealistic for beginners. The book challenges traditional networking approaches, suggesting personalized events and targeted connections. Overall, it's seen as helpful for established professionals looking to expand their network, but less applicable for those starting from scratch.
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