Selfie

1. The Western self evolved from Ancient Greek individualism to modern perfectionism

"The story is ecology to economy to social practices to cognition," Nisbett told me. Our Western self is the son of this atomized world.

Ancient Greek origins: The Western concept of self was born in Ancient Greece, shaped by its unique geography and economy. The fragmented landscape of islands and city-states fostered a culture of individualism, competition, and personal achievement. This laid the foundation for the modern Western self, characterized by:

• Belief in personal agency and free will
• Valorization of individual accomplishments
• Pursuit of perfection and self-improvement
• Competitive nature in various aspects of life

Evolution over time: This Greek ideal of the self evolved through various historical periods, including:

• Medieval Christianity
• The Renaissance
• The Enlightenment
• Industrial Revolution
• Modern consumer capitalism

Each era added new layers to the Western concept of self, ultimately leading to our current age of perfectionism, where individuals feel constant pressure to improve and achieve in all areas of life.

2. Christianity reshaped the self as inherently sinful, requiring constant inner struggle

"From almost any page of Atlas Shrugged, a voice can be heard, from painful necessity, commanding, "To a gas chamber – go!"'

Shift in self-perception: Christianity introduced the concept of original sin, fundamentally altering how individuals viewed themselves. This new paradigm:

• Portrayed humans as inherently flawed and sinful
• Emphasized the need for constant self-examination and repentance
• Created an internal struggle between the "sinful" self and the ideal Christian self

Lasting impact: Although secularization has diminished the direct influence of Christian theology, its legacy persists in Western culture:

• The idea of a "true" inner self that must be discovered or cultivated
• A tendency towards self-criticism and feelings of inadequacy
• The belief that personal transformation requires struggle and sacrifice

This Christian-influenced view of the self set the stage for later movements that promised to "fix" or improve the inherently flawed individual.

3. The self-esteem movement promised a quick fix but led to narcissism and unrealistic expectations

"The narcissism epidemic, rising as quickly as obesity."

Origins and promises: The self-esteem movement, popularized in the late 20th century, offered a seductive solution to personal and societal problems:

• Claimed that boosting self-esteem would solve issues like crime, poverty, and underachievement
• Promoted unconditional praise and positive affirmations
• Promised that feeling good about oneself was the key to success and happiness

Unintended consequences: While well-intentioned, the movement had several negative outcomes:

• Rise in narcissistic traits among younger generations
• Inflated and unrealistic expectations of success and recognition
• Difficulty coping with failure or criticism
• Decreased empathy and consideration for others

The movement's emphasis on feeling good about oneself, regardless of actual achievements or behavior, contributed to a culture of entitlement and self-centeredness that continues to shape modern society.

4. Neoliberalism intensified individualism and competition, reshaping our sense of self

"Economics are the method," said Thatcher, "but the object is to change the soul."

Neoliberal ideology: The rise of neoliberalism in the late 20th century further intensified Western individualism:

• Emphasized free markets and minimal government intervention
• Promoted the idea of individuals as self-interested economic actors
• Encouraged competition in all areas of life, from education to healthcare

Impact on self-perception: This economic and political philosophy reshaped how individuals view themselves and their place in society:

• Increased pressure to be self-reliant and entrepreneurial
• Fostered a mindset of constant self-improvement and optimization
• Created a sense that personal worth is tied to economic success
• Led to increased anxiety and insecurity as individuals bear more risk

The neoliberal self is expected to be flexible, adaptable, and always striving for success in a competitive world, contributing to the modern pressure for perfection.

5. Social media and technology have amplified the pressure for perfection and constant self-presentation

"People could have done all sorts of things with that technology," said Professor Campbell, who co-authored Twenge's research into the narcissism 'epidemic'. "We could've filled the internet with pictures of flowers and architecture and "Mom-ies" – taking pictures of our mom every day and saying how great our mom is. But we didn't do that. Well, we did it a little bit. But selfies are what boomed."

Digital amplification: Social media and mobile technology have intensified the pressure to present a perfect image of oneself:

• Constant connectivity allows for 24/7 self-presentation and comparison
• Filters and editing tools create unrealistic standards of beauty and success
• Quantification of social approval through likes, followers, and engagement metrics

Psychological impact: This digital environment has significant effects on mental health and self-perception:

• Increased anxiety and depression, especially among younger users
• Fear of missing out (FOMO) and constant comparison to others
• Addiction to validation and attention from online audiences
• Difficulty separating online personas from authentic selves

The digital age has created a culture of constant performance and self-branding, where individuals feel pressure to curate and present idealized versions of themselves to the world.

6. The modern self is caught between conflicting ideals of authenticity and perfection

"These different selves reflect the fact that these are different social environments that we're occupying."

Conflicting demands: Modern individuals face a paradoxical challenge:

• Be authentic and true to oneself
• Constantly improve and strive for perfection in all areas of life

This tension creates significant psychological stress and confusion about one's identity.

Multiple selves: Research suggests that we don't have a single, authentic self, but rather multiple selves that emerge in different contexts:

• Work self vs. personal self
• Online self vs. offline self
• Ideal self vs. actual self

The pressure to reconcile these various selves and present a coherent, perfect identity contributes to feelings of inadequacy and impostor syndrome. Recognizing the multiplicity of the self may be key to navigating the demands of modern life without succumbing to perfectionism.

7. Understanding personality traits reveals the limits of self-transformation

"Seductive though it might be," writes Nettle, "there's no more point in me wishing myself to have a higher or lower level of extraversion than there is to wish I were, say, born in 1777."

Stability of personality: Research in personality psychology suggests that core traits are relatively stable throughout life:

• The "Big Five" traits: openness, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism
• These traits are influenced by genetic factors and early life experiences
• While some change is possible, dramatic personality transformations are rare

Implications for self-improvement: Understanding the stability of personality traits challenges popular notions of unlimited self-transformation:

• Self-help advice promising radical change may be unrealistic
• Efforts at self-improvement may be more effective when working within one's natural tendencies
• Accepting one's fundamental personality may lead to greater self-acceptance and well-being

This research suggests that rather than trying to become an entirely different person, individuals may find more success in understanding and working with their innate tendencies.

8. Embracing our limitations may be key to thriving in the age of perfectionism

"You're limited. Imperfect. And there's nothing you can do about it."

Challenging cultural myths: The age of perfectionism promotes several harmful ideas:

• You can be anything you want to be
• Unlimited potential for self-transformation
• Perfection is attainable and necessary for success

Recognizing these as myths is the first step towards a healthier self-image.

Benefits of accepting limitations: Embracing our imperfections and limitations can lead to:

• Reduced anxiety and stress
• More realistic goals and expectations
• Greater self-compassion and acceptance
• Improved relationships as we accept others' limitations as well

Strategies for thriving: To navigate the age of perfectionism:

• Focus on personal growth within your natural tendencies
• Cultivate self-compassion and realistic self-assessment
• Recognize the multiplicity of the self and the contextual nature of identity
• Limit exposure to social media and other sources of unrealistic comparison
• Seek support from others who value authenticity over perfection

By accepting our fundamental nature while still striving for growth and improvement, we can find a balance between the conflicting demands of modern life and achieve a more sustainable and fulfilling sense of self.

Last updated: January 24, 2025