So You've Been Publicly Shamed

1. Public shaming has made a comeback in the digital age

After a lull of almost 180 years (public punishments were phased out in 1837 in the United Kingdom and in 1839 in the United States), it was back in a big way.

Historical context: Public shaming was once a common form of punishment, used to enforce social norms and punish transgressors. It fell out of favor in the 19th century, seen as too cruel and ineffective. However, the rise of social media has brought about a resurgence of public shaming, now amplified by the global reach and permanence of the internet.

Modern manifestations:

• Online call-out culture
• Viral social media posts exposing perceived wrongdoings
• Cancel culture targeting public figures and ordinary individuals
• Doxxing and harassment campaigns

The digital age has given everyone the power to shame others, often with little consideration for context or proportionality. This new form of public shaming can have far-reaching consequences for its targets, affecting their personal and professional lives long after the initial incident.

2. Social media has amplified the power and reach of public shaming

We were at the start of a great renaissance of public shaming. After a lull of almost 180 years (public punishments were phased out in 1837 in the United Kingdom and in 1839 in the United States), it was back in a big way.

Viral nature: Social media platforms allow information to spread rapidly, reaching millions of people within hours. This amplification effect can turn a minor mistake or misunderstanding into a global spectacle.

Permanence: Unlike historical forms of public shaming, online shaming leaves a permanent digital record that can haunt individuals for years.

Mob mentality: The anonymity and distance provided by social media can lead to a mob mentality, where individuals pile on without fully considering the consequences of their actions.

Key factors contributing to the amplification:

• Ease of sharing and reposting content
• Algorithmic promotion of engaging (often outrageous) content
• Echo chambers reinforcing and escalating outrage
• Lack of context in short-form social media posts

3. The consequences of online shaming can be devastating and long-lasting

"I had a great career and I loved my job and it was taken away from me and there was a lot of glory in that. Everybody else was very happy about that. I cried out my body weight in the first twenty-four hours. It was incredibly traumatic. You don't sleep. You wake up in the middle of the night forgetting where you are."

Personal toll: Online shaming can lead to severe emotional distress, anxiety, depression, and even suicidal thoughts. Victims often experience a profound sense of isolation and helplessness.

Professional impact: Many individuals lose their jobs and struggle to find new employment due to the persistent online record of their shaming.

Long-term consequences:

• Difficulty in personal relationships
• Ongoing anxiety about being recognized or re-shamed
• Financial hardship due to job loss or difficulty finding work
• Loss of reputation and social standing
• Psychological trauma requiring therapy or counseling

The disproportionate nature of online shaming means that a single mistake or misunderstanding can have life-altering consequences, far outweighing the original transgression.

4. Shame is a powerful emotion with deep psychological impacts

"Universal among the violent criminals was the fact that they were keeping a secret," Gilligan wrote. "A central secret. And that secret was that they felt ashamed—deeply ashamed, chronically ashamed, acutely ashamed."

Psychological effects: Shame is a profound emotion that can have severe impacts on mental health and behavior. It can lead to feelings of worthlessness, isolation, and a desire to hide or disappear.

Link to violence: Research by psychiatrist James Gilligan found a strong connection between chronic shame and violent behavior. Individuals who feel deeply ashamed may lash out as a way to regain a sense of power and self-worth.

Key insights on shame:

• Can lead to self-destructive behaviors
• May cause individuals to withdraw from social interactions
• Can be a barrier to seeking help or admitting mistakes
• Often rooted in childhood experiences or trauma
• Can be perpetuated by societal norms and expectations

Understanding the profound impact of shame is crucial for developing more effective and humane approaches to justice and social correction.

5. The justice system often employs shaming tactics, sometimes to harmful effect

"You need to figure out something that's so esoteric the expert can't possibly know about it. Maybe it's something that's not relevant to the case, but it has to be something they cannot know the answer to. They'll be incapable of saying they don't know. So they'll gradually walk down the garden to the place where they look really stupid."

Courtroom tactics: Lawyers often use shaming techniques to discredit witnesses or defendants. These tactics can be psychologically damaging and may not serve the interests of justice.

Systemic issues: The use of shaming in the justice system can perpetuate cycles of violence and criminality, rather than promoting rehabilitation and reintegration.

Problematic practices in the justice system:

• Public humiliation as punishment
• Degrading treatment of prisoners
• Use of shame in interrogation techniques
• Stigmatization of ex-offenders

The reliance on shaming in the justice system raises questions about the effectiveness and ethics of these approaches, particularly in light of research on the psychological impacts of shame.

6. There are alternatives to shaming that may be more effective for rehabilitation

"If shaming worked, if prison worked, then it would work," Jim said to me. "But it doesn't work."

Restorative justice: Approaches that focus on healing and repairing harm, rather than punishment and shame, can be more effective in reducing recidivism and promoting positive change.

Therapeutic communities: Programs that treat offenders with respect and provide opportunities for growth and learning have shown promise in rehabilitation efforts.

Key elements of alternative approaches:

• Emphasis on education and skill-building
• Addressing underlying trauma and mental health issues
• Promoting empathy and understanding
• Providing opportunities for meaningful work and contribution
• Focusing on reintegration into society

These alternative approaches challenge the traditional punitive model of justice, suggesting that treating individuals with dignity and providing opportunities for growth can lead to better outcomes for both offenders and society.

7. We must critically examine our role in online shaming culture

I'd been dismayed by the cruelty of the people who tore Jonah apart as he tried to apologize. But they weren't the mob. We were the mob.

Self-reflection: It's crucial to examine our own participation in online shaming, recognizing that even well-intentioned actions can contribute to harmful outcomes.

Motivation analysis: Understanding why we engage in shaming behavior – whether for justice, social status, or a sense of belonging – can help us make more conscious choices.

Questions to consider:

• Are we contributing to a culture of fear and silence?
• Are our actions proportional to the perceived offense?
• Are we considering the full context and potential consequences?
• Are we allowing for the possibility of growth, learning, and redemption?

By critically examining our role in shaming culture, we can work towards creating a more compassionate and nuanced online environment.

8. Empathy and forgiveness are crucial in a world quick to judge and shame

"As soon as the victim steps out of the pact by refusing to feel ashamed," he said, "the whole thing crumbles."

Power of empathy: Cultivating empathy can help us resist the urge to shame others and respond more compassionately to perceived transgressions.

Importance of forgiveness: Embracing forgiveness – both for others and ourselves – can break cycles of shame and promote healing.

Strategies for promoting empathy and forgiveness:

• Seeking to understand others' perspectives and experiences
• Recognizing our own fallibility and capacity for mistakes
• Allowing for growth and change in others
• Practicing self-compassion when we fall short
• Promoting a culture that values learning from mistakes over punishment

By prioritizing empathy and forgiveness, we can create a society that is more resilient, compassionate, and capable of addressing complex social issues without resorting to harmful shaming practices.

Last updated: January 22, 2025