The First Six Weeks

1. The first six weeks are crucial for establishing parenting routines

Nothing can prepare you for the sleep deprivation, the tears, the love and the confusion.

Foundational period: The first six weeks after birth are both challenging and rewarding. This time sets the stage for your parenting journey and your baby's development. New parents often feel overwhelmed, but it's important to remember that everyone goes through this adjustment period.

Key focus areas:

• Feeding (breast or bottle)
• Sleep patterns
• Bonding and attachment
• Basic care routines (diaper changes, bathing)

Support system: Utilize help from partners, family, and professionals. Don't hesitate to ask for assistance or advice when needed. Remember, there's no perfect way to parent, and you're learning alongside your baby.

2. Consistent bath, bottle, and bed routine promotes better sleep

The bath, bottle and bed (BBB) routine that I invented gets the dad or partner to bath the baby at 10 pm, dress him, wrap him and give him a bottle of formula.

Establish consistency: The BBB routine helps set your baby's internal clock and promotes longer sleep stretches. Start this routine from the first night home and maintain it consistently.

Key components:

• Bath at 10 pm (initially)
• Followed by feeding (breast or bottle)
• Wrapping/swaddling
• Putting to bed

As your baby grows, gradually move the bath time earlier, aiming for a 6-7 pm bedtime by 3-4 months. This routine allows both parents to be involved and gives the mother a chance for uninterrupted sleep.

3. Breastfeeding takes time to establish but offers numerous benefits

Feed your baby, wrap your baby, hold your baby, keep him close. These are the keys of early parenting and attachment.

Patience and persistence: Breastfeeding is a learned skill for both mother and baby. It can take up to six weeks to establish a good breastfeeding routine. Don't be discouraged if it doesn't come easily at first.

Benefits of breastfeeding:

• Perfect nutrition for your baby
• Enhances bonding
• Provides antibodies to boost immunity
• Convenient and cost-effective

Seek support: If you're struggling with breastfeeding, don't hesitate to seek help from lactation consultants or experienced midwives. Remember, fed is best, so if breastfeeding isn't working out, formula is a perfectly acceptable alternative.

4. Crying is normal and not always a sign of distress

Crying is a normal part of the baby's development. Some babies cry a lot, and even though you are aware that babies cry before you have one, there is nothing more disturbing than your baby crying at length, and when you are unable to stop or settle him.

Understanding baby cries: Crying is your baby's primary form of communication. It doesn't always indicate distress or pain. Babies cry for various reasons, including hunger, tiredness, discomfort, or simply needing attention.

Common causes of crying:

• Hunger
• Wet or dirty diaper
• Tiredness
• Overstimulation
• Colic or reflux

Coping strategies: Stay calm and work through possible causes systematically. Remember, it's okay to put your baby down in a safe place and take a short break if you're feeling overwhelmed. Seek help if crying is excessive or you're struggling to cope.

5. Babies develop at their own pace; floor time is essential

A baby needs around 1000 hours of floor time before walking.

Individual development: Every baby develops at their own pace. Avoid comparing your baby to others or worrying about developmental milestones. Instead, focus on providing a nurturing environment that supports natural growth and exploration.

Benefits of floor time:

• Strengthens muscles
• Develops spatial awareness
• Encourages exploration and curiosity
• Supports natural progression of motor skills

Limit use of equipment: Avoid overuse of swings, bouncers, and other devices that restrict movement. These can interfere with natural development and delay important milestones like crawling and walking.

6. Postpartum emotions are complex; seek help when needed

Having help during your antenatal and postnatal period has such a profound effect on your parenting: you are doing the right thing not only for yourself but also your baby.

Emotional rollercoaster: The postpartum period brings a wide range of emotions, from joy and excitement to anxiety and sadness. It's normal to experience mood swings and occasional feelings of being overwhelmed.

Signs to watch for:

• Persistent sadness or anxiety
• Difficulty bonding with your baby
• Thoughts of harming yourself or your baby
• Inability to care for yourself or your baby

Seek support: Don't hesitate to reach out for help if you're struggling. Talk to your partner, family, friends, or healthcare providers. Professional support, including therapy or medication, can be crucial in managing postpartum depression or anxiety.

7. Attachment parenting builds lifelong emotional security

Attachment takes place not only through breastfeeding; the attachment is as strong for women who bottle-feed their babies. The most important thing is a happy mother; that is what drives the attachment and creates a lifelong bond of love and security between mother and child.

Building bonds: Attachment parenting focuses on creating strong emotional connections between parent and child. This approach lays the foundation for lifelong emotional security and healthy relationships.

Key elements of attachment parenting:

• Responsive feeding (breast or bottle)
• Physical closeness and touch
• Sensitive and prompt response to baby's cues
• Positive and loving communication

Remember, attachment is about quality of interaction, not specific parenting methods. A happy, responsive parent is the key to secure attachment, regardless of feeding method or other parenting choices.

8. Immunization and SIDS prevention are critical for infant health

Immunisation is the most significant public health intervention in the last 200 years, providing a safe and efficient way to prevent the spread of many diseases that cause hospitalisation, serious ongoing health conditions and sometimes death.

Protect your baby: Immunizations and SIDS prevention measures are crucial for safeguarding your baby's health and well-being. Stay informed and follow current medical recommendations.

Key SIDS prevention strategies:

• Always place baby on back to sleep
• Use a firm sleep surface
• Keep soft objects out of the crib
• Avoid overheating
• No smoking around baby

Immunization benefits:

• Prevents serious diseases
• Protects vulnerable populations
• Contributes to community immunity

Discuss any concerns about vaccines with your healthcare provider to make informed decisions.

9. Grandparents play a vital role in supporting new parents

Not only will having your parents and/or your parents-in-law around help you understand and respect what they have done for you and your partner, but also you may be amazed by their unconditional love and their ability to multitask by keeping you all fed, the house clean and the washing done.

Multigenerational support: Grandparents can provide invaluable support to new parents, offering practical help, emotional support, and a wealth of experience.

Ways grandparents can help:

• Assisting with household chores
• Providing childcare
• Offering emotional support and advice
• Sharing family traditions and stories

Managing relationships: Clear communication is key to maintaining positive relationships with grandparents. Establish boundaries and express appreciation for their help. Remember, parenting styles may differ across generations, so be prepared to discuss and compromise when necessary.

10. Adapting to siblings requires patience and understanding

All this is normal. But there are a few basic steps to follow to help the little one—and you—cope better with the situation.

Big changes: The arrival of a new baby can be challenging for older siblings. It's normal for them to experience a range of emotions, from excitement to jealousy and confusion.

Strategies for helping siblings adjust:

• Involve the older child in baby care
• Maintain routines and one-on-one time
• Acknowledge their feelings
• Emphasize their special role as a big brother/sister

Patience is key: Remember that adjustment takes time. Continue to show love and attention to all your children, and be patient as everyone adapts to the new family dynamic.

Last updated: August 8, 2024