The Four Agreements

1. Become Aware of Your Self-Limiting Beliefs

We have the need to justify everything, to explain and understand everything, in order to feel safe.

The human mind is domesticated. From birth, we are programmed with beliefs, rules, and agreements that shape our perception of reality. This "Book of Law" governs our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors, often limiting our potential and happiness. Many of these beliefs are fear-based and self-limiting, creating a "dream of hell" in our minds.

Awareness is the first step to freedom. To break free from these limiting beliefs, we must first become aware of them. This involves:

• Recognizing the "Judge" and "Victim" in our minds
• Identifying the agreements we've made with ourselves and others
• Questioning the validity of our beliefs and assumptions
• Observing how these beliefs affect our emotions and actions

By developing this awareness, we create the opportunity to challenge and change our self-imposed limitations, opening the door to personal transformation and freedom.

2. Be Impeccable with Your Word

Your word is the power that you have to create.

Words have immense power. They shape our reality, influence our emotions, and affect those around us. Being impeccable with your word means using the power of speech with integrity and intention. This agreement encourages us to:

• Speak with truthfulness and kindness
• Avoid gossip, criticism, and self-deprecation
• Use words to uplift and empower ourselves and others
• Align our speech with our true intentions and values

The impact of impeccable speech is profound. By practicing this agreement, we:

• Build trust and stronger relationships
• Reduce internal conflicts and self-doubt
• Create a positive self-image and boost self-esteem
• Manifest our desires more effectively through clear communication

Remember, every word is a seed planted in our minds and the minds of others. Choose your words wisely and cultivate a garden of positivity and growth.

3. Don't Take Anything Personally

Nothing other people do is because of you. It is because of themselves.

Others' actions reflect their reality, not yours. When we take things personally, we make the assumption that everything is about us. In reality, people's behaviors, opinions, and actions are shaped by their own beliefs, fears, and experiences. Understanding this can liberate us from unnecessary suffering.

Emotional freedom comes from detachment. By not taking things personally, we:

• Reduce emotional reactivity and stress
• Maintain our inner peace regardless of external circumstances
• Develop stronger self-esteem and self-confidence
• Improve relationships by reducing conflicts and misunderstandings

Practice observing others' actions and words without immediately relating them to yourself. Remember that their behavior is a projection of their own dream and has little to do with you. This shift in perspective can dramatically reduce emotional suffering and increase personal freedom.

4. Don't Make Assumptions

We have the tendency to make assumptions about everything. The problem with making assumptions is that we believe they are the truth.

Assumptions create misunderstandings and drama. Our minds are programmed to fill in gaps of information, often leading to incorrect conclusions. These assumptions can cause unnecessary conflicts, anxiety, and misinterpretations in our relationships and daily life.

To break this habit:

• Practice clear communication
• Ask questions when you're unsure
• Verify information before acting on it
• Be open to different perspectives and possibilities

Clarity leads to better relationships and decisions. By avoiding assumptions, we:

• Reduce conflicts and misunderstandings
• Make more informed decisions
• Improve our relationships through open communication
• Reduce anxiety and stress caused by imagined scenarios

Remember, it's always better to ask and clarify than to assume and potentially create problems based on false information.

5. Always Do Your Best

Under any circumstance, always do your best, no more and no less.

Your best is dynamic and context-dependent. This agreement acknowledges that our capacity varies from moment to moment based on our physical, emotional, and mental state. Doing your best doesn't mean being perfect; it means giving your all given your current circumstances.

Benefits of always doing your best:

• Eliminates self-judgment and regret
• Increases self-satisfaction and motivation
• Improves overall performance and results
• Reduces stress and pressure

Consistency is key. By consistently applying this principle:

• You develop discipline and resilience
• Your "best" improves over time
• You learn to balance effort and self-care
• You cultivate self-acceptance and reduce perfectionism

Remember, your best will vary day to day. The goal is to give your all in each moment, accepting that sometimes your best will be extraordinary, and other times it may be just getting through the day.

6. Break Free from Domestication

Every human is a magician, and we can either put a spell on someone with our word or we can release someone from a spell.

Societal conditioning limits our potential. From birth, we are domesticated by our families, education systems, and society at large. This process, while necessary for social cohesion, often suppresses our true nature and instills limiting beliefs.

Steps to break free from domestication:

1. Recognize the "parasite" of societal programming
2. Question long-held beliefs and assumptions
3. Reclaim your authentic self and desires
4. Practice new, empowering agreements

Freedom comes from conscious choice. By breaking free from domestication:

• We rediscover our innate creativity and joy
• We make choices aligned with our true selves
• We experience greater authenticity in relationships
• We unlock our full potential and live more fulfilling lives

Remember, breaking free is a process. Be patient with yourself as you unlearn old patterns and embrace your authentic nature.

7. Embrace Personal Freedom

The freedom we are looking for is the freedom to be ourselves, to express ourselves.

True freedom is internal. Many people associate freedom with external circumstances, but real freedom comes from within. It's the ability to be authentically yourself, express your true nature, and live according to your values.

Key aspects of personal freedom:

• Self-acceptance and self-love
• Emotional independence from others' opinions
• Ability to make choices aligned with your values
• Freedom from self-limiting beliefs and fears

Cultivating freedom is a practice. To embrace personal freedom:

• Practice self-awareness and mindfulness
• Challenge and release limiting beliefs
• Set healthy boundaries in relationships
• Make choices based on your authentic desires, not external pressures

As you cultivate inner freedom, you'll find that your external life begins to align more closely with your true self, leading to greater fulfillment and happiness.

8. Practice Forgiveness and Self-Love

We have to forgive ourselves for all the stupid things we have done in our lives. I cannot accept myself if I don't forgive myself.

Forgiveness is the path to healing. Holding onto resentment, guilt, and self-judgment creates emotional wounds that prevent us from experiencing love and joy. Forgiveness, both of ourselves and others, is crucial for emotional healing and personal growth.

Steps to practice forgiveness and self-love:

1. Acknowledge past hurts and mistakes
2. Understand that everyone, including yourself, is doing their best given their level of awareness
3. Choose to release negative emotions and judgments
4. Practice self-compassion and understanding

Self-love transforms your reality. By cultivating forgiveness and self-love:

• You heal emotional wounds and reduce suffering
• You improve your relationships with others
• You increase your capacity for joy and happiness
• You align more closely with your authentic self

Remember, forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. It doesn't mean condoning harmful actions, but rather freeing yourself from the burden of negative emotions.

9. Live in the Present Moment

If you live in a past dream, you don't enjoy what is happening right now because you will always wish it to be different than it is.

The present is all we truly have. Many of us spend our lives dwelling on the past or worrying about the future, missing the beauty and opportunities of the present moment. Living in the now allows us to fully experience life and make the most of each moment.

Benefits of present-moment awareness:

• Reduced anxiety and stress
• Increased joy and appreciation for life
• Improved focus and productivity
• Enhanced relationships and connections

Mindfulness is the key. To cultivate present-moment awareness:

• Practice meditation and mindfulness exercises
• Engage fully in your current activities
• Let go of regrets about the past and worries about the future
• Appreciate the small moments and simple pleasures of life

By anchoring yourself in the present, you'll find greater peace, clarity, and fulfillment in your daily life.

10. Face Your Fears and Transform Your Life

The angel of death can teach us to live every day as if it is the last day of our lives, as if there may be no tomorrow.

Confronting fear leads to liberation. Many of our limitations and sufferings stem from fear – fear of failure, rejection, or even success. By facing these fears head-on, we can break through our self-imposed barriers and live more fully.

Strategies for facing fears:

• Identify and acknowledge your fears
• Challenge the validity of fear-based beliefs
• Take small, consistent steps outside your comfort zone
• Use visualization and positive affirmations to build courage

Transformation comes from action. By confronting your fears:

• You expand your comfort zone and capabilities
• You discover hidden strengths and talents
• You increase your self-confidence and resilience
• You open yourself to new opportunities and experiences

Remember, courage isn't the absence of fear, but the willingness to act despite it. Each time you face a fear, you grow stronger and more capable of creating the life you desire.

Last updated: July 19, 2024