Understanding the Highly Sensitive Child

1. Highly Sensitive Children Process Information More Deeply

A highly sensitive child has a very sensitive nervous system. That means they process information from the senses more deeply and more thoroughly than a non-highly sensitive child.

Heightened awareness. Highly sensitive children notice subtle details that others might miss. This keen observation extends to their environment, people's emotions, and sensory input. They're constantly processing information, which can be both a gift and a challenge.

Deep thinking. These children don't just notice more; they think more deeply about what they observe. They ponder questions that might seem beyond their years, analyzing situations from multiple angles. This can lead to impressive insights but also mental exhaustion.

• Common traits of highly sensitive children:
  • Notice tiny details in their surroundings
  • Pick up on others' emotions easily
  • Ask profound questions
  • Spend a lot of time in thought

2. Intense Experiences Define the Highly Sensitive Child's World

Think, for a moment, of life as a film. For a non-highly sensitive child, life is a film on the television set – colourful and noisy but not intensely so. For a sensitive child, life is a film on a cinema screen.

Amplified sensations. Highly sensitive children experience the world with heightened intensity. Colors seem brighter, sounds louder, and textures more pronounced. This intensity applies to both positive and negative experiences, creating a world of vivid highs and challenging lows.

Emotional depth. These children feel emotions deeply, often experiencing multiple feelings simultaneously. A simple event like a trip to the café can be a rollercoaster of sensations and emotions. This emotional intensity can be overwhelming but also leads to profound empathy and rich inner experiences.

• Examples of intense experiences:
  • Overpowering joy from a beautiful sunset
  • Acute distress from loud noises or crowded spaces
  • Deep empathy for others' pain
  • Lingering effects from emotional events

3. Overstimulation and Overwhelm are Common Challenges

Full-scale overload is about a specific situation – like Arthur at the party. It's fairly easy to spot.

Sensory overload. Highly sensitive children can quickly become overwhelmed by stimuli that others find manageable. This overload can manifest as emotional outbursts, withdrawal, or physical symptoms like headaches or stomachaches.

The "too much" effect. These children often find many aspects of daily life to be "too" something – too loud, too bright, too scratchy. While they can cope with some level of discomfort, there's a tipping point where it becomes unbearable. Parents and caregivers need to be attuned to these thresholds.

• Signs of overstimulation:
  • Emotional meltdowns
  • Withdrawal or zoning out
  • Complaints about physical discomfort
  • Difficulty transitioning between activities
  • Resistance to seemingly normal situations

4. Highly Sensitive Children Have Unique and Profound Needs

All the highly sensitive child wants is to feel okay in themselves – that they're doing okay, that they're not a bad person, that their way of being is just fine.

Need for self-worth. Highly sensitive children are often deeply affected by criticism and may struggle with feelings of inadequacy. They need consistent reassurance and support to build a strong sense of self-worth.

Craving calm. These children have a fundamental need for calm environments and experiences. They require regular opportunities to decompress and process their intense experiences. Creating safe, quiet spaces and incorporating calming activities into their routine is crucial.

• Key needs of highly sensitive children:
  • Validation of their experiences and feelings
  • Regular quiet time for processing and recharging
  • Gentle guidance and patience
  • Understanding and acceptance of their sensitivity
  • Opportunities for creative expression

5. Caution and Careful Observation are Hallmarks of Sensitivity

Arthur isn't cowardly. He's cautious. And who's to say that's wrong? After all, which child is most likely to have an accident at the playground: 'Dive In' Kathryn or 'Be Cautious' Arthur?

Thoughtful approach. Highly sensitive children often take more time to observe and consider new situations before engaging. This isn't shyness or fear, but a careful assessment of the environment and potential outcomes.

Safety consciousness. These children are naturally more attuned to potential dangers, which can be a valuable trait. Their caution can prevent accidents and help them make more informed decisions. However, it's important to balance this with encouragement to try new things.

• Benefits of a cautious approach:
  • More thorough risk assessment
  • Fewer impulsive decisions
  • Deeper understanding of situations
  • Increased safety awareness

6. Creativity and Deep Thinking Flourish in Sensitive Children

Many highly sensitive child are highly creative in some way. That can mean being interested in the arts – music, theatre, literature, sculpture, painting, architecture and so on. And it can also mean being creative thinkers: little entrepreneurs, little trend-setters.

Artistic inclination. Highly sensitive children often have a natural affinity for creative pursuits. Their deep processing and intense experiences provide rich material for artistic expression, whether through visual arts, music, writing, or other forms.

Innovative thinking. Beyond traditional arts, these children often excel in creative problem-solving and imaginative thinking. Their ability to notice subtle details and make unique connections can lead to innovative ideas and solutions.

• Ways to nurture creativity in sensitive children:
  • Provide diverse artistic materials and experiences
  • Encourage exploration of different creative outlets
  • Value and celebrate their unique ideas
  • Create time and space for unstructured creative play
  • Expose them to various forms of art and creative expression

7. Being Different: The Reality of High Sensitivity in a Fast-Paced World

The highly sensitive child is different.

Unique perspective. Highly sensitive children experience the world in a fundamentally different way from their peers. This uniqueness can be both a source of strength and a challenge, particularly in environments that don't accommodate or value sensitivity.

Navigating a less sensitive world. As these children grow, they must learn to navigate a world that often moves at a faster pace and with less consideration for sensitivities. This requires developing coping strategies and self-advocacy skills, as well as finding environments and relationships that support their needs.

• Strategies for embracing sensitivity:
  • Educate others about high sensitivity
  • Find and connect with other sensitive individuals
  • Identify and leverage the strengths of sensitivity
  • Develop personalized coping strategies for challenging situations
  • Advocate for accommodations when needed

Last updated: October 8, 2024