Want

1. Fantasies Reveal Our Hidden Desires and Needs

The human imagination has few limits and our sexual desires and fantasies are no different, yet are still treated as taboo.

Inner Worlds Unveiled. Fantasies are not just random thoughts; they are a window into our deepest desires, needs, and fears. They allow us to explore aspects of ourselves that we might suppress or ignore in our daily lives. These inner worlds can be more stimulating than physical experiences, offering a space free from social constraints.

• Fantasies can reveal a desire for control, submission, or escape.
• They can highlight unmet emotional needs, such as a longing for affection or validation.
• They can also be a way to explore different identities and roles.

Beyond the Physical. Fantasies often transcend the purely physical, delving into emotional and psychological realms. They can be a way to process complex feelings, explore taboo desires, or simply escape the mundane. They are a safe space to experiment with our arousal and desire without risk of harm or criticism.

Personal and Unique. Each person's fantasies are unique, reflecting their individual experiences, values, and desires. They are not something to be judged or compared, but rather to be understood as a vital part of our inner lives. They are a way to crystallize our wants and needs, and can help us to better understand ourselves.

2. Shame and Taboo Still Constrain Female Sexuality

I found it surprising that a great number of women today continue to keep their fantasies to themselves.

Persistent Barriers. Despite progress in sexual liberation, many women still feel shame and guilt about their sexual fantasies. This is often due to societal norms, religious beliefs, and internalized patriarchal values that limit and constrain female sexuality.

• Women are often taught to prioritize others' needs over their own, leading to a suppression of their desires.
• The fear of judgment and social stigma prevents many women from openly discussing their fantasies.
• This silence perpetuates the taboo surrounding female sexuality, making it harder for women to embrace their desires.

Internalized Conflict. The conflict between societal expectations and personal desires can lead to internal discomfort and shame. Many women question the validity of their fantasies, especially if they are considered unusual or transgressive. This internal struggle can be a barrier to self-acceptance and sexual liberation.

Breaking the Silence. Openly discussing and sharing fantasies, even anonymously, can be a powerful way to challenge shame and break down taboos. By bringing these hidden desires into the light, women can find validation, connection, and a greater sense of self-acceptance.

3. Power Dynamics Play Out in Our Imaginations

My whole body, all of me – [I want to] hand it over and let it be completely possessed by someone.

Desire for Control and Submission. Fantasies often explore power dynamics, with many women fantasizing about either being in control or surrendering control. This can be a way to explore different aspects of their identity and desires.

• Some women fantasize about being dominated, perhaps as a way to escape the pressures of their daily lives.
• Others fantasize about being in control, perhaps as a way to assert their agency and power.
• These fantasies are not necessarily a reflection of real-life desires, but rather a way to explore different roles and dynamics.

Reversal of Roles. Fantasies can also be a way to reverse traditional gender roles and expectations. Women who are often expected to be passive and submissive in real life may fantasize about being dominant and assertive. This can be a way to challenge societal norms and explore different aspects of their sexuality.

Safe Exploration. Fantasies provide a safe space to explore potentially dangerous or demeaning situations within the confines of our minds. They allow us to play out scenarios that we would never want to experience in real life, but that can be sexually arousing in the context of fantasy.

4. The Allure of the Forbidden and the Off-Limits

I cannot seem to express my secret desires to my husband. It feels … embarrassing and scary.

The Thrill of the Taboo. Fantasies often involve the forbidden, the off-limits, and the transgressive. This can be a way to explore desires that are considered taboo by society, culture, or religion.

• Fantasies about same-sex relationships, infidelity, or unconventional sexual acts can be a way to challenge social norms and explore hidden desires.
• The forbidden nature of these fantasies can be a source of intense arousal.
• The risk of discovery or judgment can add an extra layer of excitement.

Challenging Conventions. Fantasies about the off-limits can also be a way to challenge the conventions of what women "ought" to desire. They can be a way to reclaim agency and explore desires that are often suppressed or ignored.

Personal Boundaries. What is considered "off-limits" is highly personal and subjective. Fantasies can be a way to explore our own boundaries and understand what truly excites us, without the constraints of social expectations.

5. The Spectrum of Kink and Fetish is Vast and Varied

I love to fantasise about cocks, the more the better...

Beyond the Mainstream. Kink and fetish are a broad spectrum of sexual interests that go beyond the mainstream. They can involve specific acts, objects, or scenarios that are considered unconventional or taboo.

• Kinks and fetishes are highly personal and can be influenced by individual experiences, culture, and imagination.
• They can range from BDSM and role-playing to specific body parts, materials, or scenarios.
• The internet has played a significant role in the visibility and acceptance of diverse sexual interests.

Challenging Norms. Kink and fetish can be a way to challenge societal norms and explore the boundaries of sexuality. They can be a way to reclaim agency and find pleasure in unexpected places.

Personal Expression. Kink and fetish are a form of personal expression and can be a way to explore different aspects of one's identity and desires. They are not something to be judged or shamed, but rather to be understood as a valid part of the human experience.

6. The Erotic Power of Being Watched and Watching

Thinking about them watching me while I pleasure myself drives me wild.

Voyeurism and Exhibitionism. Fantasies often involve the dynamic of being watched and watching others. This can be a way to explore the power of the gaze and the interplay between subject and object.

• Voyeuristic fantasies can be a way to experience arousal through observation and the thrill of the forbidden.
• Exhibitionistic fantasies can be a way to feel desired and validated by the attention of others.
• These fantasies can be a way to explore the boundaries of privacy and public display.

Control and Agency. In fantasies of being watched, the individual often retains a sense of control and agency. They are the ones who choose to be seen, and they can control how they are perceived. This can be a way to reclaim power and challenge the objectification of the female body.

The Female Gaze. Fantasies of watching others can also be a way to explore the female gaze and challenge the male-dominated perspective of sexuality. They can be a way to reclaim the power of observation and find pleasure in the act of seeing.

7. The Comfort and Safety of Tenderness and Connection

I want to be made to feel like I am utterly desired.

Beyond the Physical. Not all fantasies are about power, dominance, or transgression. Many women fantasize about tenderness, affection, and emotional connection.

• These fantasies often involve a desire for safety, comfort, and validation.
• They can be a way to explore the emotional aspects of sexuality and the importance of intimacy.
• They can also be a response to the pressures and demands of modern life, a longing for a simpler, more nurturing experience.

Emotional Intimacy. For some women, emotional intimacy is a prerequisite for sexual arousal. They may fantasize about a partner who is attentive, caring, and emotionally available. This can be a way to explore the importance of connection and vulnerability in sexual relationships.

Healing and Nurturing. Fantasies of tenderness and connection can also be a way to heal from past traumas or unmet emotional needs. They can be a way to create a safe and nurturing space where one can feel loved and accepted.

8. Exploring the Self Through Fantasies of Multiplicity

I want multiple husbands who all know and like each other. I want them to have other wives. No one owns anyone.

Beyond Monogamy. Fantasies of threesomes, moresomes, and group sex are common, reflecting a desire to explore beyond the confines of monogamy. These fantasies can be a way to challenge traditional relationship structures and explore different forms of intimacy.

• They can be a way to experience a greater variety of sexual experiences and sensations.
• They can be a way to explore different power dynamics and roles.
• They can also be a way to challenge the idea of ownership and exclusivity in relationships.

Shared Pleasure. Fantasies of multiplicity often involve a sense of shared pleasure and connection. They can be a way to explore the idea of sexual energy as a communal force, rather than a private experience.

Freedom and Exploration. These fantasies can be a way to explore sexual freedom and experiment with different forms of intimacy without the constraints of real-life relationships. They can be a way to push boundaries and discover new aspects of one's sexuality.

9. The Enduring Appeal of Specific Types and Scenarios

I’ve always had a thing for men in a position of power, but more specifically middle-aged teachers.

Personal Preferences. Fantasies often revolve around specific types of people or scenarios that are particularly arousing to the individual. These preferences can be rooted in personal history, cultural influences, or simply individual taste.

• Fantasies about specific professions, physical attributes, or personality traits are common.
• These preferences can be a way to explore different aspects of one's identity and desires.
• They can also be a way to create a sense of familiarity and comfort in the realm of fantasy.

The Power of Detail. The specific details of a fantasy can be crucial to its appeal. The way a person looks, smells, or moves can all contribute to the overall erotic experience.

Consistent Themes. While fantasies can be diverse and ever-changing, many people have recurring themes or characters that they return to again and again. These consistent elements can be a way to explore deeper desires and needs.

10. Technology and the Future of Sexual Fantasy

I can’t wait for perfectly built, fully realistic, sexually functioning male robots.

The Impact of Technology. Technology has had a profound impact on the way we experience and explore our sexuality. The internet, social media, and virtual reality have all created new avenues for sexual expression and fantasy.

• The accessibility of pornography and other forms of erotic content has expanded the range of sexual possibilities.
• Virtual reality and artificial intelligence are creating new opportunities for immersive and personalized sexual experiences.
• Technology can also be a way to connect with others who share similar sexual interests and fantasies.

Ethical Considerations. As technology continues to evolve, it is important to consider the ethical implications of its impact on sexuality. Questions about consent, objectification, and the potential for exploitation need to be addressed.

The Future of Fantasy. Technology will likely continue to play a significant role in the future of sexual fantasy. As we become more comfortable with virtual and artificial forms of intimacy, we may see a blurring of the lines between fantasy and reality.

Last updated: February 3, 2025