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Working With Emotional Intelligence

Working With Emotional Intelligence

by Daniel Goleman 2011 400 pages
3.83
5k+ ratings
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Key Takeaways

1. Emotional Intelligence: The New Yardstick for Professional Success

The rules for work are changing. We're being judged by a new yardstick: not just by how smart we are, or by our training and expertise, but also by how well we handle ourselves and each other.

Paradigm shift in success metrics. Emotional intelligence (EI) has emerged as a critical factor in professional success, often outweighing traditional measures like IQ and technical expertise. This shift reflects the growing recognition that in today's complex work environment, the ability to navigate emotions—both our own and others'—is paramount.

EI components and their impact. Emotional intelligence comprises five key elements: self-awareness, self-regulation, motivation, empathy, and social skills. These competencies contribute significantly to job performance across various fields, from sales and leadership to healthcare and education. Research consistently shows that individuals with high EI are more likely to be top performers, adapt well to change, and foster positive work environments.

  • EI accounts for 67% of abilities required for superior performance in leaders
  • EI is twice as important as IQ and technical skills in determining excellence
  • High EI correlates with increased productivity, job satisfaction, and organizational commitment

2. Self-Awareness: The Foundation of Emotional Competence

Understanding someone's point of view or perspective—knowing why they feel as they do—does not inevitably mean embracing it.

Recognizing and understanding emotions. Self-awareness is the cornerstone of emotional intelligence, involving the ability to recognize and understand one's own emotions, strengths, weaknesses, values, and motivations. This insight forms the basis for all other emotional competencies and is crucial for effective decision-making and personal growth.

Tools for enhancing self-awareness. Developing self-awareness requires consistent effort and reflection. Techniques such as mindfulness meditation, journaling, and seeking feedback from others can significantly improve one's ability to tune into their emotional state and its impact on behavior.

  • Regular self-reflection exercises
  • 360-degree feedback assessments
  • Personality and emotional intelligence tests
  • Mindfulness and meditation practices

3. Self-Regulation: Mastering Your Emotions for Peak Performance

The ability to handle feelings so that they are appropriate is an ability that builds on self-awareness.

Emotional control for professional success. Self-regulation involves managing disruptive emotions and impulses effectively. In the workplace, this translates to maintaining composure under pressure, adapting to change, and making thoughtful decisions even in stressful situations. Professionals with strong self-regulation skills are more likely to build trust, handle conflicts constructively, and maintain high performance standards.

Strategies for improving self-regulation. Developing better emotional control requires practice and the cultivation of specific habits. Key strategies include:

  • Identifying emotional triggers and developing response plans
  • Practicing stress-management techniques (e.g., deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation)
  • Cultivating a growth mindset to view challenges as opportunities
  • Regularly engaging in physical exercise to reduce stress and improve mood
  • Developing healthy sleep habits to enhance emotional resilience

4. Motivation: The Drive That Fuels Achievement

People with high levels of motivation are driven to achieve beyond expectations—their own and everyone else's.

Internal drive for excellence. Motivation in the context of emotional intelligence refers to the intrinsic drive to achieve goals, persevere in the face of setbacks, and maintain optimism. Highly motivated individuals are passionate about their work, seek challenges, and consistently strive for improvement.

Cultivating intrinsic motivation. To enhance motivation, professionals can:

  • Set clear, challenging, yet attainable goals
  • Find ways to align personal values with work objectives
  • Celebrate small victories and milestones
  • Seek feedback and use it constructively
  • Develop a personal mission statement to guide career decisions
  • Cultivate a sense of purpose beyond financial rewards

5. Empathy: Understanding and Leveraging Others' Emotions

Empathy is our social radar.

The power of perspective-taking. Empathy involves the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. In the workplace, empathetic individuals excel at reading social cues, understanding diverse perspectives, and responding appropriately to others' emotional states. This skill is crucial for effective leadership, teamwork, and customer relations.

Developing empathy. Enhancing empathic abilities can be achieved through:

  • Active listening: Focusing fully on the speaker without interrupting or judging
  • Practicing perspective-taking exercises
  • Exposure to diverse cultures and viewpoints
  • Volunteering or engaging in community service
  • Utilizing emotional intelligence training programs
  • Seeking feedback on interpersonal interactions

6. Social Skills: The Art of Managing Relationships

The single most important factor in maximizing the excellence of a group's product is the degree to which the members are able to create a state of internal harmony.

Building and maintaining relationships. Social skills encompass a range of abilities that enable individuals to interact effectively with others, including communication, conflict resolution, leadership, and collaboration. These skills are essential for building strong teams, navigating office politics, and creating a positive work environment.

Enhancing social competence. To improve social skills, professionals can:

  • Practice clear and assertive communication
  • Develop conflict resolution techniques
  • Engage in team-building activities
  • Seek leadership opportunities, even in small projects
  • Network actively within and outside the organization
  • Cultivate emotional intelligence in everyday interactions

7. Emotional Intelligence in Organizations: A Competitive Edge

The paradox of work is that the best way to get job security is to abandon the quest for it and focus on becoming more valuable to customers.

EI as an organizational asset. Organizations with high collective emotional intelligence tend to outperform their competitors. They foster environments of trust, creativity, and collaboration, leading to increased innovation, customer satisfaction, and employee retention.

Implementing EI in organizational culture. To leverage emotional intelligence at an organizational level:

  • Incorporate EI assessments in hiring and promotion processes
  • Provide emotional intelligence training for all employees
  • Encourage open communication and feedback
  • Recognize and reward emotionally intelligent behaviors
  • Foster a culture of empathy and understanding
  • Align organizational values with emotionally intelligent practices

8. Developing Emotional Competencies: A Lifelong Journey

Unlike IQ, which changes little after our teen years, emotional intelligence seems to be largely learned, and it continues to develop as we go through life and learn from our experiences.

Continuous growth and adaptation. Emotional intelligence is not fixed; it can be developed and enhanced throughout one's life and career. This ongoing development is crucial in adapting to changing work environments and personal circumstances.

Strategies for lifelong EI development. To continually improve emotional intelligence:

  • Seek regular feedback on emotional competencies
  • Engage in ongoing self-reflection and self-assessment
  • Participate in mentoring relationships, both as mentor and mentee
  • Attend workshops and seminars focused on EI skills
  • Practice mindfulness and emotional awareness daily
  • Apply EI principles in personal and professional contexts
  • Read widely on emotional intelligence and related topics

Last updated:

Review Summary

3.83 out of 5
Average of 5k+ ratings from Goodreads and Amazon.

Working with Emotional Intelligence received mixed reviews. Many praised its insights on the importance of emotional competencies in the workplace, citing practical examples and valuable lessons. However, some found it repetitive, overly long, and lacking in new information compared to Goleman's previous work. Critics pointed out potential bias in the research methodology. Despite these criticisms, readers generally agreed on the relevance of emotional intelligence in professional settings, particularly for leadership roles. The book's emphasis on soft skills and their impact on career success resonated with many readers.

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About the Author

Daniel Goleman is a renowned psychologist and author who has significantly influenced education, relationships, and business practices through his work on emotional intelligence. His book "Emotional Intelligence" became a bestseller and has been translated into 40 languages. Goleman's ideas on emotional intelligence have been described as revolutionary and paradigm-shifting by publications like The Harvard Business Review. He has been ranked among the most influential business thinkers by The Wall Street Journal. Goleman's more recent works focus on the importance of attention and leadership, expanding on his theories of emotional intelligence and their applications in various aspects of life and business.

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