Facebook Pixel
Searching...
简体中文
EnglishEnglish
EspañolSpanish
简体中文Chinese
FrançaisFrench
DeutschGerman
日本語Japanese
PortuguêsPortuguese
ItalianoItalian
한국어Korean
РусскийRussian
NederlandsDutch
العربيةArabic
PolskiPolish
हिन्दीHindi
Tiếng ViệtVietnamese
SvenskaSwedish
ΕλληνικάGreek
TürkçeTurkish
ไทยThai
ČeštinaCzech
RomânăRomanian
MagyarHungarian
УкраїнськаUkrainian
Bahasa IndonesiaIndonesian
DanskDanish
SuomiFinnish
БългарскиBulgarian
עבריתHebrew
NorskNorwegian
HrvatskiCroatian
CatalàCatalan
SlovenčinaSlovak
LietuviųLithuanian
SlovenščinaSlovenian
СрпскиSerbian
EestiEstonian
LatviešuLatvian
فارسیPersian
മലയാളംMalayalam
தமிழ்Tamil
اردوUrdu
The Art of People

The Art of People

11 Simple People Skills That Will Get You Everything You Want
作者 Dave Kerpen 2016 288 页数
3.39
1k+ 评分

重点摘要

1. 了解自己与他人:人际交往技能的基础

自我意识是人际交往艺术的基本构建块。只有在深刻理解自己的基础上,才能理解和影响他人。

认识自己。 首先可以通过性格评估工具,如九型人格,来深入了解自己的动机、优势和潜在的陷阱。这种自我认知为理解他人奠定了基础。

有效解读他人。 注意非语言信号:

  • 面部表情
  • 身体语言
  • 语调
  • 眼神交流
  • 个人空间

通过提升解读这些信号的能力,你将更深入地理解他人的想法、感受和意图,从而更有效地沟通和建立联系。

2. 掌握倾听的艺术:建立联系的关键

倾听、倾听,再倾听更多。

积极倾听至关重要。 这不仅仅是听到言语,而是需要全身心的投入和理解。可以练习以下技巧:

  • 全神贯注
  • 保持眼神交流
  • 使用鼓励性的身体语言
  • 避免打断
  • 提问以澄清

镜像与验证。 重复你所听到的内容,以显示理解和同理心。这种被称为“镜像”的技巧使说话者感到被倾听和重视,从而加深你们之间的联系。

3. 真诚连接:脆弱与验证

哭泣是赢家的特权。

接受脆弱。 分享个人故事和情感,甚至到流泪的程度,可以创造强大的联系。这展现了真实感,使他人能够在更深层次上产生共鸣。

验证他人的感受。 当有人分享他们的想法或情感时:

  • 认可他们的观点
  • 表达同理心
  • 避免评判或立即解决问题

这种方法建立了信任,增强了个人和职业关系。

4. 通过给予影响他人:慷慨的力量

你永远得不到你不去请求的东西。

实践慷慨。 定期提供帮助、介绍人脉或分享有价值的信息,而不期待立即回报。这建立了良好的关系和愿意回报的人脉网络。

明确你的需求。 虽然给予很重要,但在需要时不要害怕提出明确、具体的请求。人们通常愿意提供帮助,但他们需要知道你的需求。

  • 直接但礼貌
  • 解释背景和重要性
  • 无论结果如何都要表达感激

5. 以愿景和责任感引领

团队中没有“我”,但领导中有“我”。

设定清晰的愿景。 作为领导者,专注于:

  1. 传达整体愿景
  2. 确保合适的人在合适的角色中
  3. 提供必要的资源

培养责任感。 实施团队成员相互负责的系统,而不仅仅依赖自我责任。这种方法提高了动力和结果。

以身作则。 展示你期望团队成员具备的行为和态度。你的行动在塑造组织文化和绩效方面比言语更有说服力。

6. 有效解决冲突:耐心与视角

让冷静的头脑占上风。

管理情绪。 当冲突发生时,避免立即反应。给自己和他人一些时间冷静下来,再尝试解决问题。

寻求理解。 以好奇心而非防御心态接近冲突。试着从对方的角度看待问题。

专注于解决方案。 在处理冲突时:

  • 冷静地陈述问题
  • 倾听所有相关方
  • 一起头脑风暴潜在解决方案
  • 达成共识,明确前进的方向
  • 跟进以确保问题得到解决

7. 激励并让人快乐:感激的艺术

让每一天都充满甜蜜。

真诚表达感激。 定期认可和庆祝他人的努力和成就。可以通过以下方式进行:

  • 口头表扬
  • 手写感谢信
  • 公开表彰
  • 小而用心的礼物

惊喜与愉悦。 偶尔在表达感激时超越常规。创造特别的时刻或活动,让人们感到被重视和重要。

保持一致。 让感激成为一种习惯,而不仅仅是一次性的事件。持续的认可建立了积极的文化,激励持续的表现。

8. 利用社交媒体进行个人品牌和网络建设

你在网上的形象就是你生活中的形象。

在线保持真实。 你的数字形象应反映真实的自我。在各个平台上持续分享你的想法、经历和专业知识。

策划有价值的内容。 定期分享能够教育、娱乐或激励你网络的内容。这使你成为一个有价值的资源,并让你始终处于人们的视野中。

有意义地互动。 不要仅仅广播;与他人的内容互动,回应评论,在线建立真实的关系。

9. 终极悖论:善待他人是成功之道

终极悖论是,获得工作和生活中一切想要的秘密在于善待他人,而不是试图获取一切。

关注他人。 通过优先考虑他人的需求和福祉,你创造了一个真正想要帮助你成功的人脉网络。

建立长期关系。 避免短期思维或操控。投资于真实的、互利的关系,这些关系可以持续一生。

保持耐心。 通过建立关系获得成功可能需要更长的时间,但从长远来看,这种方式更可持续且更令人满足。

最后更新日期:

FAQ

What's "The Art of People" about?

  • Focus on People Skills: "The Art of People" by Dave Kerpen is about mastering people skills to achieve personal and professional success. It emphasizes the importance of understanding and connecting with others.
  • Practical Advice: The book provides practical advice and actionable steps to improve interpersonal relationships, communication, and influence.
  • Comprehensive Guide: It covers a wide range of topics, including networking, reading people, influencing others, and resolving conflicts.
  • Blueprint for Success: Kerpen shares a blueprint for success that hinges on building strong, authentic relationships with the people around you.

Why should I read "The Art of People"?

  • Improve Relationships: The book offers valuable insights into improving both personal and professional relationships through better communication and understanding.
  • Actionable Tips: It provides actionable tips and strategies that can be implemented immediately to see positive changes in interactions with others.
  • Real-Life Examples: Kerpen uses real-life examples and stories to illustrate the effectiveness of the techniques he discusses, making the concepts relatable and easy to understand.
  • Comprehensive Coverage: It covers a wide range of people skills, making it a comprehensive guide for anyone looking to enhance their interpersonal abilities.

What are the key takeaways of "The Art of People"?

  • People Matter: Success and happiness are deeply connected to the relationships you build with others.
  • Listening is Crucial: Active listening and understanding others' perspectives are fundamental to effective communication and influence.
  • Authenticity and Transparency: Being genuine and transparent in interactions builds trust and strengthens relationships.
  • Influence through Help: Helping others and showing genuine interest in their needs can lead to mutual benefits and influence.

How does Dave Kerpen suggest improving networking skills?

  • Wear Orange Shoes: Kerpen suggests creating a signature style, like wearing orange shoes, to stand out and attract people to you at networking events.
  • Use LinkedIn Effectively: He advises optimizing your LinkedIn profile and using it to connect with professionals who can help you achieve your goals.
  • Create an Advisory Board: Forming a personal advisory board can provide guidance, support, and valuable connections.
  • Ask "How Can I Help You?": This question shows genuine interest in others and can open doors to meaningful relationships.

What is the Enneagram Assessment mentioned in "The Art of People"?

  • Personality Assessment Tool: The Enneagram is a personality assessment tool used to understand oneself and others better.
  • Nine Personality Types: It categorizes people into nine major types, each with its strengths and potential pitfalls.
  • Self-Awareness: The assessment helps individuals gain self-awareness, which is crucial for improving interpersonal relationships.
  • Application in Communication: Understanding your Enneagram type can guide how you communicate and interact with others effectively.

How does "The Art of People" address conflict resolution?

  • Validation and Empathy: Kerpen emphasizes the importance of validating others' feelings and showing empathy to resolve conflicts.
  • Structured Approach: He provides a structured approach to conflict resolution, including setting appointments to discuss issues and using mirroring techniques.
  • Letting Go: In some cases, letting go of control and focusing on self-care can be the best way to resolve unsolvable conflicts.
  • Cooler Heads Prevail: Waiting for emotions to settle before addressing conflicts can lead to more productive and rational discussions.

What are some of the best quotes from "The Art of People" and what do they mean?

  • "People Matter": This quote underscores the book's central theme that relationships are key to success and happiness.
  • "Listening is a magnetic and strange thing, a creative force": It highlights the power of listening in building connections and understanding others.
  • "The secret to getting everything you want at work and in life is treating people well": This quote encapsulates the book's message that kindness and empathy lead to success.
  • "You can’t achieve happiness or success in a vacuum": It emphasizes the importance of building strong relationships for personal and professional fulfillment.

How does Dave Kerpen suggest using social media for personal branding?

  • Be Authentic: Kerpen advises being authentic and transparent online, as who you are online should reflect who you are in life.
  • Curate Content: Instead of creating all content, curate and share valuable content that resonates with your audience.
  • Engage with Others: Actively engage with your audience by responding to comments and messages to build relationships.
  • Use Quotes: Sharing inspirational quotes can be an effective way to connect with and inspire your audience.

What is the "Platinum Rule" in "The Art of People"?

  • Beyond the Golden Rule: The Platinum Rule suggests doing unto others as they would want done to them, rather than as you would want done to you.
  • Understanding Others' Perspectives: It requires understanding and considering others' perspectives and preferences in interactions.
  • More Effective Communication: This approach leads to more effective communication and stronger relationships.
  • Empathy and Flexibility: It emphasizes empathy and flexibility in dealing with others, adapting to their needs and desires.

How does "The Art of People" suggest handling negative feedback?

  • Private Criticism: Kerpen advises giving criticism privately to avoid embarrassment and maintain respect.
  • Praise Sandwich: Use a praise sandwich approach—start with positive feedback, deliver the criticism, and end with more positive feedback.
  • Focus on Solutions: Offer constructive solutions and work together to address the issues.
  • Emphasize Growth: Frame feedback as an opportunity for growth and improvement rather than a personal attack.

What role does gratitude play in "The Art of People"?

  • Mood Enhancer: Practicing gratitude can instantly improve your mood and outlook, making you more positive and approachable.
  • Daily Practice: Kerpen suggests incorporating gratitude into daily routines, such as writing thank you cards or reflecting on things you're grateful for.
  • Builds Relationships: Expressing gratitude strengthens relationships by making others feel appreciated and valued.
  • Contagious Positivity: Gratitude can create a ripple effect, spreading positivity and goodwill to those around you.

How can "The Art of People" help in professional development?

  • Enhance Communication Skills: The book provides tools and techniques to improve communication, a critical skill in any profession.
  • Build a Strong Network: It offers strategies for effective networking and relationship-building, essential for career growth.
  • Leadership Development: Kerpen's insights into leadership can help individuals become more effective and inspiring leaders.
  • Conflict Resolution: The book's conflict resolution strategies can lead to a more harmonious and productive work environment.

评论

3.39 满分 5
平均评分来自 1k+ 来自Goodreads和亚马逊的评分.

《人际交往的艺术》收到了褒贬不一的评价。一些读者认为这本书富有洞察力且实用,赞扬其对人际交往技巧的现代解读和易于实施的建议。另一些人则批评其缺乏原创性,内容肤浅,过于侧重于作者的个人经历。批评者认为,书中的许多建议都是常识,或者是从其他来源重新整理而来。尽管一些读者欣赏书中的现实案例和可操作的步骤,但也有人觉得这本书缺乏深度和科学依据。总体而言,关于其在改善人际关系和实现成功方面的价值和有效性,意见分歧。

Your rating:

关于作者

戴夫·凯尔彭是一位企业家、作家和演讲者,以其在社交媒体营销和人际交往技巧方面的专业知识而闻名。他是社交媒体软件公司Likeable Local的创始人兼首席执行官,同时也是Likeable Media的联合创始人。凯尔彭撰写了多本关于商业和社交媒体的畅销书,包括《受欢迎的社交媒体》和《人际交往的艺术》。他经常为《Inc.》和《福布斯》等出版物撰稿,并曾在CNBC和福克斯新闻上亮相。凯尔彭的理念强调真实性、倾听以及在个人和职业关系中建立真诚联系的重要性。

0:00
-0:00
1x
Dan
Andrew
Michelle
Lauren
Select Speed
1.0×
+
200 words per minute
Create a free account to unlock:
Requests: Request new book summaries
Bookmarks: Save your favorite books
History: Revisit books later
Ratings: Rate books & see your ratings
Try Full Access for 7 Days
Listen, bookmark, and more
Compare Features Free Pro
📖 Read Summaries
All summaries are free to read in 40 languages
🎧 Listen to Summaries
Listen to unlimited summaries in 40 languages
❤️ Unlimited Bookmarks
Free users are limited to 10
📜 Unlimited History
Free users are limited to 10
Risk-Free Timeline
Today: Get Instant Access
Listen to full summaries of 73,530 books. That's 12,000+ hours of audio!
Day 4: Trial Reminder
We'll send you a notification that your trial is ending soon.
Day 7: Your subscription begins
You'll be charged on Mar 1,
cancel anytime before.
Consume 2.8x More Books
2.8x more books Listening Reading
Our users love us
50,000+ readers
"...I can 10x the number of books I can read..."
"...exceptionally accurate, engaging, and beautifully presented..."
"...better than any amazon review when I'm making a book-buying decision..."
Save 62%
Yearly
$119.88 $44.99/year
$3.75/mo
Monthly
$9.99/mo
Try Free & Unlock
7 days free, then $44.99/year. Cancel anytime.
Settings
Appearance
Black Friday Sale 🎉
$20 off Lifetime Access
$79.99 $59.99
Upgrade Now →