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End Emotional Eating

End Emotional Eating

Using Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills to Cope with Difficult Emotions and Develop a Healthy Relationship to Food
by Jennifer Taitz PsyD 2012 256 pages
3.92
100+ ratings
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Key Takeaways

1. Recognize emotional eating as a coping mechanism, not a food problem

"Emotional eating is not about the food; it's about how you've learned to cope with your emotions."

Root cause analysis: Emotional eating is a learned behavior that develops as a way to manage difficult emotions or situations. It's not fundamentally about hunger or nutrition, but rather about seeking comfort, distraction, or relief from emotional discomfort. Understanding this distinction is crucial for addressing the real issues at hand.

Shifting perspective: By recognizing emotional eating as a coping mechanism, individuals can:

  • Focus on emotional healing rather than restrictive dieting
  • Develop compassion for themselves instead of shame or guilt
  • Explore the underlying emotional needs driving their behavior
  • Seek more effective and sustainable solutions for emotional well-being

2. Identify and understand your emotional eating triggers

"Awareness is the first step towards change – when you can recognize your triggers, you gain the power to choose a different response."

Self-awareness exercise: Keep an emotional eating journal to track:

  • Situations that lead to emotional eating
  • Specific emotions experienced before eating
  • Types of food craved or consumed
  • Level of physical hunger versus emotional urge

Common triggers: Understanding common emotional eating triggers can help identify personal patterns:

  • Stress and overwhelm
  • Boredom or loneliness
  • Sadness or depression
  • Anxiety or fear
  • Celebration or reward
  • Anger or frustration

By recognizing these patterns, individuals can develop strategies to address the root causes of their emotional eating and create more effective coping mechanisms.

3. Develop mindfulness to break the automatic eating response

"Mindfulness allows you to pause between emotion and action, creating space for conscious choice."

Mindful eating practices:

  • Take three deep breaths before eating
  • Engage all senses while eating (sight, smell, texture, taste)
  • Eat slowly and chew thoroughly
  • Check in with hunger and fullness cues throughout the meal

Breaking the automaticity: Mindfulness interrupts the habitual cycle of emotional eating by:

  • Increasing awareness of physical hunger versus emotional cravings
  • Allowing time to process emotions before turning to food
  • Enhancing enjoyment and satisfaction from meals
  • Promoting better digestion and nutrient absorption

Regular mindfulness practice, even for a few minutes daily, can strengthen the ability to respond consciously to emotional triggers rather than reacting automatically with food.

4. Practice self-compassion instead of self-criticism

"Self-compassion is not self-indulgence; it's the foundation for lasting change and emotional resilience."

Self-compassion components:

  • Self-kindness: Treat yourself with understanding and gentleness
  • Common humanity: Recognize that struggles are part of the shared human experience
  • Mindfulness: Observe thoughts and feelings without judgment

Benefits of self-compassion:

  • Reduces shame and guilt associated with emotional eating
  • Increases motivation for positive change
  • Enhances emotional regulation skills
  • Promotes overall well-being and mental health

Practicing self-compassion involves treating oneself with the same kindness and understanding one would offer a good friend. This approach fosters a supportive internal dialogue that encourages growth and healing rather than perpetuating the cycle of emotional eating.

5. Cultivate alternative coping strategies for difficult emotions

"Expanding your emotional toolkit gives you options beyond food when facing life's challenges."

Emotion-specific strategies:

  • Stress: Deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, or short walks
  • Boredom: Engage in a hobby, call a friend, or start a small project
  • Sadness: Journal, listen to uplifting music, or practice gratitude
  • Anger: Physical activity, punch a pillow, or practice assertive communication
  • Anxiety: Grounding techniques, mindfulness meditation, or seek support

Building emotional intelligence:

  • Learn to identify and name emotions accurately
  • Understand the function and message behind each emotion
  • Develop healthy ways to express and process feelings
  • Practice emotional regulation techniques regularly

By expanding the repertoire of coping strategies, individuals can choose more effective and fulfilling ways to address their emotional needs without relying on food as the primary source of comfort or distraction.

6. Build a supportive environment for sustainable change

"Your environment shapes your choices – create one that nurtures your emotional and physical well-being."

Environmental modifications:

  • Stock the kitchen with nourishing, satisfying foods
  • Remove or limit trigger foods that promote mindless eating
  • Create designated eating areas free from distractions
  • Establish regular meal and snack times to stabilize hunger cues

Social support:

  • Communicate needs and boundaries with family and friends
  • Join support groups or online communities focused on emotional healing
  • Consider working with a therapist or counselor for personalized guidance
  • Surround yourself with people who model healthy relationships with food and emotions

A supportive environment reduces the frequency of emotional eating triggers and provides resources for healthier coping mechanisms. This holistic approach addresses both internal and external factors contributing to emotional eating patterns.

7. Embrace imperfection and focus on progress, not perfection

"Perfection is the enemy of progress – celebrate small wins and learn from setbacks."

Shifting mindset:

  • Recognize that change is a process, not a destination
  • View setbacks as learning opportunities rather than failures
  • Acknowledge and celebrate small improvements and efforts

Strategies for maintaining motivation:

  • Set realistic, achievable goals
  • Track progress in non-food related areas (e.g., energy levels, mood, sleep quality)
  • Practice self-reflection to identify personal growth and insights
  • Develop a growth mindset that embraces challenges as opportunities for learning

Embracing imperfection reduces the pressure and anxiety often associated with change, making the journey towards emotional healing more sustainable and enjoyable. This approach fosters resilience and long-term success in overcoming emotional eating patterns.

8. Transform your relationship with food through intuitive eating

"Intuitive eating reconnects you with your body's wisdom, freeing you from the diet mentality."

Principles of intuitive eating:

  • Reject the diet mentality
  • Honor your hunger and fullness cues
  • Make peace with all foods
  • Challenge the food police (internal critical voice)
  • Discover the satisfaction factor in eating
  • Cope with emotions without using food
  • Respect your body
  • Exercise for enjoyment and well-being

Benefits of intuitive eating:

  • Reduces food obsession and preoccupation
  • Improves body image and self-esteem
  • Enhances overall relationship with food and eating
  • Promotes physical and mental well-being

Intuitive eating provides a framework for healing the relationship with food and body, addressing both the physical and emotional aspects of eating. This approach encourages trust in the body's natural wisdom and fosters a more peaceful and balanced approach to nourishment.

9. Address underlying emotional needs and past traumas

"Healing emotional eating often requires digging deeper into unresolved emotional wounds and unmet needs."

Identifying root causes:

  • Explore childhood experiences with food and emotions
  • Examine patterns of using food for comfort, reward, or punishment
  • Uncover any past traumas or significant life events that influence eating behaviors

Healing strategies:

  • Seek professional help from a therapist specializing in eating disorders or trauma
  • Practice self-reflection through journaling or meditation
  • Engage in body-based therapies to process stored emotions
  • Learn and practice healthy ways to meet emotional needs (e.g., connection, safety, validation)

Addressing underlying emotional issues is often crucial for long-term recovery from emotional eating. This process involves facing difficult emotions and experiences, but it paves the way for genuine healing and transformation in one's relationship with food, emotions, and self.

Last updated:

Review Summary

3.92 out of 5
Average of 100+ ratings from Goodreads and Amazon.

Readers find End Emotional Eating helpful in addressing emotional eating and general emotional regulation. Many praise the practical exercises and strategies for managing emotions and improving self-awareness. Some find the book's approach applicable beyond just eating issues. Positive reviews highlight the book's emphasis on self-acceptance and mindfulness. Critics note repetition and occasional textbook-like content. Overall, readers appreciate the book's insights on emotional awareness and developing a healthier relationship with food, though some wished for more specific focus on emotional eating.

About the Author

Jennifer Taitz, PsyD, is a clinical psychologist and director of the dialectical behavior therapy program at the American Institute for Cognitive Therapy in New York. She is certified by the Academy of Cognitive Therapy and serves on the founding board of the New York City Association for Contextual Behavior Science. Dr. Taitz specializes in helping people manage emotions and develop healthier relationships with food and themselves. Her work focuses on practical strategies to enhance joy, wellbeing, and productivity. Through her writing and clinical practice, she aims to provide accessible tools for emotional regulation and self-improvement.

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