Dinner Table Tension

Ben De Backer sits at dinner with their parents, feeling the weight of a secret. Their parents' questions about school and grades are laced with expectations and subtle pressure. Ben tries to keep the peace, deflecting with half-truths and small talk, but inside, anxiety churns. The family's dynamic is tense, with Ben's mother fussing over small things and their father enforcing strict rules. Ben's mind is elsewhere, rehearsing the words they want to say: "I am nonbinary." The fear of rejection and the hope for acceptance battle inside Ben, setting the stage for a pivotal night.

The Night of Truth

After a restless evening, Ben finally gathers the courage to come out to their parents as nonbinary. The moment is raw and vulnerable, but the response is devastating. Their father reacts with disbelief and anger, their mother with silence and religious guilt. The conversation quickly escalates, and Ben is told to leave the house. The door closes behind them, and Ben is left outside, alone, in the cold, with nowhere to go. The sense of betrayal and heartbreak is immediate and overwhelming, marking the end of one chapter and the uncertain beginning of another.

Kicked Out, Alone

With nowhere else to turn, Ben calls their estranged older sister, Hannah, from a pay phone. It's been a decade since they last spoke, but Hannah answers and, without hesitation, drives to pick Ben up. The reunion is awkward but necessary. Ben is taken in by Hannah and her husband, Thomas, and given a place to stay. The trauma of being kicked out lingers, and Ben struggles with feelings of abandonment, shame, and fear about the future. The first night in Hannah's guest room is sleepless, haunted by memories and uncertainty.

Hannah's Open Door

Hannah welcomes Ben into her home, offering support but also grappling with her own guilt for having left Ben behind years ago. Thomas is kind and practical, helping Ben enroll in a new school. The adjustment is difficult—Ben is wary, withdrawn, and unsure of their place in this new family dynamic. Hannah tries to bridge the gap, asking about pronouns and offering practical help, but both siblings are haunted by the past. The sense of safety is fragile, but it's a start.

New Home, New Rules

Ben begins to settle into Hannah and Thomas's home, navigating new routines and expectations. They are enrolled at North Wake High, where Thomas teaches chemistry. Ben chooses to remain closeted at school, fearing further rejection. The process of starting over is overwhelming—new clothes, new classes, and the constant anxiety of being misgendered. Therapy is suggested, and Ben reluctantly agrees to see Dr. Taylor, a local psychiatrist who specializes in LGBTQ+ youth. The journey toward healing is slow and uncertain.

Starting Over at School

North Wake High is bright and modern, but Ben feels like an outsider. They keep to themselves, avoiding attention and struggling with the loss of their old life. In the office, Ben meets Nathan Allan, a charismatic and friendly student who is assigned to show Ben around. Nathan's warmth is both comforting and intimidating. Ben is cautious, unsure if they can trust anyone with their truth. The first days are filled with awkward introductions, missed connections, and the ever-present fear of being found out.

Nathan's Outstretched Hand

Nathan persists in befriending Ben, inviting them to join his group of friends, Meleika and Sophie. Despite Ben's reluctance, Nathan's kindness begins to break through their defenses. The group's easy camaraderie is a stark contrast to Ben's loneliness. Nathan's genuine interest in Ben's art and well-being provides a lifeline. Slowly, Ben starts to open up, finding moments of peace in the art room and in Nathan's company. The seeds of trust and something deeper are planted.

Therapy and Trust

Sessions with Dr. Taylor become a safe space for Ben to process trauma, anxiety, and identity. Dr. Taylor encourages Ben to explore their feelings about family, gender, and belonging. The therapy is challenging, forcing Ben to confront painful memories and the complexity of their relationship with Hannah. Medication is introduced to help with anxiety and depression. Ben's journey is marked by setbacks—panic attacks, insomnia, and self-doubt—but also by small victories, like painting their nails and finding comfort in chosen family.

Panic and Paint

The art room, and Mrs. Liu's encouragement, offer Ben a sanctuary. Painting and drawing become outlets for emotion and self-expression. Ben's talent flourishes, culminating in a series of works that reflect their inner turmoil and hope. A panic attack at a party underscores the ongoing struggle with anxiety, but Nathan's support helps Ben through it. The act of creating art, and sharing it with others, becomes a form of healing and a way to reclaim agency.

Finding Chosen Family

Ben's circle expands to include not just Nathan, Meleika, and Sophie, but also Mariam, an online friend and nonbinary mentor. Mariam's videos and messages provide validation and guidance. The group at school becomes a surrogate family, offering acceptance and understanding that Ben never found at home. Therapy, friendship, and art intertwine, helping Ben build resilience and a sense of belonging. The idea of "chosen family" becomes central to Ben's recovery.

The Art of Healing

Mrs. Liu organizes a student art show, and Ben is encouraged to display their work—including a portrait of Nathan. The show is both a triumph and a test. Ben's parents show up uninvited, reigniting old wounds and sparking a public confrontation. Hannah intervenes, and the family's unresolved pain spills into the open. Despite the chaos, Ben's art is celebrated, and Nathan's support is unwavering. The experience forces Ben to confront the past and make choices about forgiveness and self-worth.

Parents Return, Wounds Reopen

Ben's parents reach out, expressing regret and asking Ben to come home. A tense meeting reveals that their understanding is superficial and conditional—they want Ben to return, but only on their terms. The encounter is emotionally exhausting, reopening old wounds and forcing Ben to assert boundaries. Hannah's anger and guilt resurface, leading to a cathartic confrontation between the siblings. Therapy helps them process the fallout, and Ben ultimately decides to cut ties with their parents for their own well-being.

The Power of Saying No

For the first time, Ben says no to their parents, refusing to return to a home that cannot accept them as they are. This act of self-advocacy is both liberating and terrifying. Ben's relationship with Hannah deepens as they share their respective traumas and begin to forgive each other. The process of healing is ongoing, but Ben learns that self-acceptance sometimes means letting go of those who cannot love you unconditionally.

Coming Out, Again

With Mariam's encouragement, Ben decides to come out to Nathan as nonbinary. The moment is fraught with fear, but Nathan responds with love, support, and a promise to learn and do better. The relief is palpable—Ben is finally seen and accepted for who they are by someone they care about deeply. The act of coming out, again and again, becomes a testament to Ben's courage and the power of vulnerability.

Love in Yellow

Ben and Nathan's friendship deepens into romance, marked by mutual respect, affection, and growth. Nathan becomes Ben's "person," and together they navigate the challenges of young love, identity, and the looming reality of graduation and separation. Their relationship is a source of joy and stability, a bright spot in Ben's journey. The color yellow—warm, hopeful, and vibrant—becomes a symbol of their love and the future they are building together.

Forgiveness and Forward

After a difficult confrontation, Ben and Hannah share their truths and forgive each other. Hannah reveals her own trauma and regrets, and Ben acknowledges the pain of being left behind. The siblings find common ground, recognizing that healing is a process and that they are stronger together. The past cannot be changed, but the future is theirs to shape.

Becoming Your Own Person

As graduation approaches, Ben steps into their own power. They participate in therapy, support groups, and Mariam's advocacy work. The idea of "chosen family" is solidified, and Ben learns to celebrate their identity without shame. The journey is ongoing, but Ben is no longer defined by rejection or fear. They are an artist, a friend, a sibling, and a person worthy of love.

Wishing All the Best

The story closes with Ben looking toward the future—college, advocacy, and love. The lessons learned are clear: acceptance, resilience, and the importance of being true to oneself. Ben's journey is not over, but they are surrounded by people who see and support them. The final wish, echoed by Nathan and Mariam, is simple but profound: "I wish you all the best."

Characters

Ben De Backer

Ben is a nonbinary teenager whose journey is defined by the search for identity, belonging, and love. Sensitive, artistic, and deeply introspective, Ben struggles with anxiety, depression, and the trauma of familial rejection. Their relationship with their parents is fraught, while their bond with Hannah is complicated by years of separation and guilt. Ben's development is marked by gradual self-acceptance, the courage to come out, and the willingness to build a chosen family. Through art, therapy, and friendship, Ben learns to advocate for themselves and embrace their truth.

Hannah Waller

Hannah is Ben's older sister, estranged for a decade but ultimately a lifeline when Ben is kicked out. She is practical, nurturing, and fiercely protective, but haunted by guilt for leaving Ben behind. Hannah's own trauma—escaping an abusive home and surviving her own struggles—shapes her relationship with Ben. Their reconciliation is hard-won, built on honesty, forgiveness, and mutual support. Hannah's journey is one of redemption and learning to be the sibling Ben needs.

Nathan Allan

Nathan is Ben's first real friend at North Wake High and eventually their romantic partner. Outgoing, empathetic, and loyal, Nathan is a source of warmth and stability. He is quick to offer support, whether through humor, art appreciation, or simply being present. Nathan's own journey includes coming to terms with his bisexuality and learning to support Ben's nonbinary identity. His relationship with Ben is a model of healthy, affirming young love.

Thomas Waller

Thomas is Hannah's husband and a chemistry teacher at North Wake. He is calm, reliable, and quietly compassionate, helping Ben navigate school and new routines. Thomas's presence provides a sense of normalcy and safety, and he is instrumental in Ben's adjustment to their new life. His support is unwavering, and he models the kind of allyship that is both practical and heartfelt.

Dr. Bridgette Taylor

Dr. Taylor is Ben's psychiatrist, specializing in LGBTQ+ youth. She provides a safe space for Ben to process trauma, anxiety, and identity. Her approach is patient, validating, and empowering, guiding Ben through the complexities of healing and self-acceptance. Dr. Taylor's role is pivotal in helping Ben build resilience and learn to advocate for themselves.

Mariam Haidari

Mariam is a nonbinary vlogger and Ben's online friend and mentor. Wise, funny, and deeply empathetic, Mariam provides validation, advice, and a model of queer joy. Their friendship with Ben is a lifeline, offering perspective and encouragement. Mariam's presence underscores the importance of community and representation for queer youth.

Meleika Lewis

Meleika is part of Nathan's friend group and quickly becomes one of Ben's closest friends. Outspoken, funny, and supportive, she brings energy and acceptance to the group. Meleika's friendship helps Ben feel seen and included, and her willingness to learn and adapt is a testament to true allyship.

Sophie Yeun

Sophie is another member of the friend group, known for her artistic flair and gentle humor. She is observant, kind, and always ready to offer support or a listening ear. Sophie's acceptance of Ben, especially after coming out, reinforces the theme of chosen family and the power of friendship.

Brenda and Mr. De Backer (Ben's Parents)

Ben's parents are complex figures—loving in their own way but unable to accept Ben's nonbinary identity. Their reactions range from denial and anger to guilt and superficial attempts at reconciliation. Their inability to change forces Ben to set boundaries and ultimately choose self-preservation over familial approval. Their presence in the story is a catalyst for Ben's growth and the exploration of forgiveness and autonomy.

Mrs. Liu

Mrs. Liu is Ben's art teacher and a quiet champion of their talent. She provides a safe space for creativity and self-expression, encouraging Ben to share their work and believe in their abilities. Mrs. Liu's support is instrumental in Ben's healing and self-acceptance.

Plot Devices

Coming Out as a Repeated Act

The narrative emphasizes that coming out is not a single event but a series of moments, each with its own risks and rewards. Ben comes out to parents, to Hannah, to Nathan, and to friends, each time facing new fears and hopes. This device highlights the ongoing nature of queer identity and the courage required to live authentically.

Chosen Family vs. Biological Family

The contrast between Ben's biological family and their chosen family is central. While their parents reject and misunderstand them, Hannah, Thomas, Nathan, and friends offer unconditional support. This juxtaposition explores the idea that family is defined by love and acceptance, not just blood.

Art as Healing and Expression

Ben's art is both a refuge and a means of communication. Through painting and drawing, Ben processes trauma, expresses identity, and connects with others. The art show serves as a narrative climax, symbolizing Ben's journey toward self-acceptance and visibility.

Therapy and Mental Health

Therapy sessions with Dr. Taylor provide insight into Ben's internal struggles and the process of healing. The narrative does not shy away from anxiety, depression, and panic attacks, portraying mental health as a complex, ongoing journey. Medication, support groups, and self-advocacy are woven into the story.

Symbolism of Color and Space

Colors—especially yellow—are used symbolically to represent hope, warmth, and love (notably in Ben's portrait of Nathan). Physical spaces like the art room, the roof, and the therapy office serve as sanctuaries where Ben can be themselves. These motifs reinforce the themes of safety, joy, and self-discovery.

Parallel Journeys and Forgiveness

Ben and Hannah's parallel journeys—both escaping a toxic home, both seeking forgiveness—mirror each other. Their reconciliation is a key plot device, showing that healing requires honesty, vulnerability, and mutual effort.

Analysis

I Wish You All the Best is a quietly revolutionary novel that centers the experience of a nonbinary teen navigating rejection, trauma, and the search for belonging. Mason Deaver crafts a narrative that is both deeply personal and universally resonant, exploring the complexities of identity, mental health, and the power of chosen family. The book's greatest strength lies in its authenticity—Ben's journey is messy, nonlinear, and marked by both pain and joy. The story challenges the notion that acceptance is easy or guaranteed, instead showing that healing is a process built on small acts of courage, self-advocacy, and the support of others. Through art, therapy, and love, Ben learns to define themselves on their own terms, offering hope to readers who may feel unseen or misunderstood. The novel's message is clear: you are worthy of love, you are not alone, and, whatever happens, you deserve all the best.

Last updated: July 15, 2025