I've Been Thinking . . .Reflections, Prayers, and Meditations for a Meaningful Life

1. Embrace Your Power to Choose and Recreate Your Life

“I am not what happened to me. I am what I choose to become.”

Your life is yours. You have the power to shape your life through your choices, imagination, will, and determination. Life is not a linear path, and everyone faces mistakes, pain, and regret, regardless of background. The good news is that each day offers a chance to begin anew.

Live in the present. Spending time dwelling on the past or fantasizing about the future keeps you stuck and out of touch with reality. Choosing to live authentically in the present moment, without self-judgment, allows you to direct your energy towards what truly matters: your relationships, purpose, and mission. As Ralph Waldo Emerson is often quoted, "What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us."

Re-creation is possible. Life often upends carefully made plans, forcing you to redesign your path. Examples abound of people overcoming addiction, leaving abusive situations, or rising from poverty. This requires courage to face the unknown, think creatively, be flexible, and be willing to start over. Realizing you can change and influence your life is transformative.

2. Cultivate Inner Strength and Fortitude Through Faith

Strong unwavering faith is built out of small acts along the path of your life.

Faith is the root. Intestinal fortitude – internal strength and endurance – stems from strong, unwavering faith. This faith comes from your personal beliefs and knowing there's a power greater than yourself at work. It's this foundation that helps you remain calm and centered when life shakes you.

Steadiness in chaos. People with fortitude exude a stable energy, walking through life with integrity. They don't resort to anger, name-calling, or bullying, even when faced with negativity and division in the world. Cultivating this inner strength allows you to respond from a place of power, faith, and love, rather than weakness.

Focus inward. In turbulent times, it's crucial to turn away from the hysterical negativity and focus on renewing your own faith and strengthening your fortitude. This inner work allows you to stay centered and focused on blessings, providing the strength to persevere no matter what challenges arise.

3. Find Clarity and Peace by Pausing and Reflecting

“Realize deeply that the present moment is all you ever have.”

Press the pause button. In our fast-paced world, it takes courage to pause and take a breath. Pausing allows for reflection, helping you clarify what is truly important in your life and ensuring your actions align with your values. It's an opportunity to step back from the noise and gain perspective.

Improve communication. The power of the pause can transform our interactions and national discourse. It allows us to shift from criticism to compassion, from name-calling to appreciation, from dishonesty to openness, and from screaming to speaking. Pausing gives us space to check our intentions and choose the high road.

Time for self. Great thinkers and leaders throughout history have withdrawn to reflect and journey within. Creating empty space in your day for thinking, dreaming, and just being calm is critical for mental health, creativity, and self-awareness. Being present in your own life is a powerful gift to yourself and others.

4. Connection and Community Are Essential, Don't Go It Alone

“No one heals himself by wounding another.”

We belong to each other. Despite divisions, we all share a fundamental desire to belong, be seen, and matter. Recognizing this shared humanity is the path to peace and acceptance. Understanding the experiences of others, especially those different from us, is crucial in our diverse and globally connected world.

Listen deeply. Taking the time to stop, be quiet, and truly listen to others reveals commonality beneath facades. While experiences differ, hearts and desires are often similar. Listening without judgment fosters connection and trust, whether in personal relationships or on a larger societal stage.

Asking for help is strength. The illusion of "going it alone" is isolating, overwhelming, and unsustainable. Asking for help, whether for a cause or personal support, requires strength and vulnerability. Learning to ask for and receive help from family, friends, and community opens hearts and minds, making us stronger together.

5. Let Go of Perfection and Embrace the Messiness of Life

“Perfection doesn’t make you feel perfect. It makes you feel inadequate.”

Perfection is an illusion. Chasing the idea of a perfect life – perfect looks, careers, families – is a waste of time and a guaranteed recipe for feeling inadequate. Human beings are inherently imperfect, and that's okay. Comparing yourself to unrealistic ideals leads to frustration and self-loathing.

Life is messy. A full and meaningful life is not a straight shot but a labyrinth filled with victories, mistakes, ups, downs, and surprises. It's messy, and that messiness is where learning and gaining experience happen. Accepting this reality brings relief and allows you to focus on living the life you are in right now.

Forgive yourself and others. Letting go of the need for perfection involves forgiving yourself for your imperfections and mistakes, and extending that same grace to others. This process of forgiveness is letting go of resentment and the need to feel like a victim, lightening the load of negativity you carry.

6. Lead with Love, Kindness, and Compassion

“Love is the strongest force the world possesses and yet it is the humblest imaginable.”

Love is the greatest gift. Loving and being loved is paramount. While grand gestures are nice, real, hardworking love is patient, kind, supportive, gentle, accepting, caring, listening, present, forgiving, and understanding. It's often found in small, everyday acts.

Kindness is strength. Kindness is not weakness; it requires significant strength and patience. In a world characterized by meanness and negativity, a social kindness movement is needed. Treating others with kindness, recognizing that everyone is fighting a hard battle, fosters a more caring and compassionate environment.

Care is muscular. Caregiving, whether professional or personal, is a tough, important principle for healthy families, communities, and countries. It takes courage and passion to care deeply about something or someone. Leading with love and care, even when others judge, is the most powerful way to make a difference.

7. Nurture Your Mind and Prioritize Mental Well-being

“The mind is everything. What you think you become.”

Care for your mind. Your mind is a magnificent, unique asset that will be with you your entire life. Just as you care for your physical health, you must prioritize your mental health. This includes exercising, meditating, sleeping, eating right, and continuously learning.

Challenge negative thoughts. The mind can be a powerful ally or a formidable opponent. Train your mind to work for you by becoming aware of negative thoughts and consciously redirecting them into positive statements. This shifts you from a place of doubt to a place of power, reducing fear and anxiety.

Mental health is universal. Everyone has mental health issues because everyone has a mind that needs care. Talking openly about struggles like grief, trauma, anxiety, or depression helps lift the shame and stigma. Seeking professional help or simply having someone listen is a sign of strength, not weakness.

8. Own Your Story and Discover Your Unique Purpose

“You never know how your story might inspire another.”

You are the hero. Stop giving others starring roles in your life story. Recognize your own agency, the hard work you've done, and the difficult decisions you've navigated. Own your journey, including the hurdles and mistakes, and tell it in a way that makes you feel proud.

Everyone has a mission. Each person is meant for a distinct purpose, a calling to make the world more caring, conscious, and compassionate. This purpose is not external; it lives within you. Don't wait for someone else to lead; you are the one you've been waiting for.

Speak your truth. Sharing your authentic story, including your vulnerabilities and strengths, can inspire others. Use your voice clearly and confidently on behalf of issues and people you care about. Your experiences are unique, and your mission is yours alone to rise to.

9. Practice Gratitude and Express Thanks Daily

“If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, it will be enough.”

Gratitude brings happiness. Making a conscious daily effort to be grateful scientifically leads to being happier and more hopeful. A daily gratitude practice, like listing what you're thankful for, reboots your spirit and changes your perspective on life, turning bad days into good ones.

Thank you matters. Saying "Thank you" is a powerful act that makes a huge impact. It shows you see and value the other person and their actions. Expressing gratitude, whether through words, notes, or small gestures, is a sign of care and makes people feel noticed and appreciated.

Recognize the love around you. Don't be so busy searching for a specific kind of love that you miss the love that already surrounds you every day – the patient, kind, supportive love from family and friends. Acknowledging and experiencing this real love is a gift.

10. Seek Guidance Through Faith, Prayer, and Listening

“Prayer is talking to God. Meditation is letting God talk to you.”

Ask for faith and guidance. When facing uncertainty or difficult decisions, ask for more faith and guidance. This can be done through prayer, talking to God about your thoughts and feelings, and through meditation, quieting your mind to listen for divine wisdom and direction.

Discernment brings peace. Making big decisions is tough, but processes like the Jesuits' Process of Discernment can provide a framework. This involves identifying the issue, praying for openness, gathering information, discussing with trusted people, reflecting on desires, and trusting in God's help. Living with the decision helps confirm if it brings peace.

Listen for wisdom. Guidance comes not only from within but also from others. Seek wise counsel from people who have navigated challenges and lived to tell about it. Listening to their perspectives, whether through conversation, reading, or observing, can provide clarity and help you move forward.

Last updated: May 28, 2025