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Practicing Peace in Times of War

Practicing Peace in Times of War

by Pema Chödrön 2006 113 pages
4.37
1k+ ratings
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Key Takeaways

1. Recognize the seeds of war in our hearts

War begins when we harden our hearts, and we harden them easily—in minor ways and then in quite serious, major ways, such as hatred and prejudice—whenever we feel uncomfortable.

The root of conflict. War and peace originate within each individual's heart and mind. When we feel threatened or uncomfortable, we tend to harden our hearts, creating a chain reaction of negativity. This hardening can manifest in small ways, like getting irritated by minor annoyances, or escalate into more serious forms of hatred and prejudice.

Breaking the cycle. Recognizing this pattern is the first step towards change. By understanding that our reactions to discomfort are the seeds of larger conflicts, we can begin to interrupt the cycle. This awareness allows us to:

  • Identify moments when we're starting to harden our hearts
  • Pause and reflect before reacting
  • Choose a more compassionate response

2. Practice peace through personal transformation

If you could have a bird's-eye perspective on the Earth and could look down at all the conflicts that are happening, all you'd see are two sides of a story where both sides think they're right.

Individual responsibility. Achieving peace, whether personal or global, requires each person to take responsibility for their own thoughts and actions. This transformation begins with recognizing our own biases and prejudices, and working to soften our hardened perspectives.

Practical steps:

  • Cultivate self-awareness of your reactions and judgments
  • Practice empathy by trying to understand opposing viewpoints
  • Engage in regular self-reflection to identify areas for personal growth
  • Commit to non-violent communication and conflict resolution

3. Cultivate patience to overcome aggression

Patience is an enormously supportive and even magical practice. It's a way of completely shifting the fundamental human habit of trying to resolve things by either going to the right or the left, labeling things "good" or labeling them "bad."

The power of patience. Patience is a transformative tool in overcoming aggression and promoting peace. It allows us to step back from our immediate reactions and create space for a more thoughtful response.

Practicing patience:

  • When triggered, pause and take a deep breath before reacting
  • Observe your emotions without immediately acting on them
  • Allow uncomfortable feelings to exist without trying to fix or change them
  • Recognize that discomfort is temporary and will pass

4. Embrace insecurity as a path to growth

When an old culture is dying, the new culture is created by those people who are not afraid to be insecure.

Transformative potential of uncertainty. Insecurity and uncertainty, often perceived as negative experiences, can actually be powerful catalysts for personal and societal growth. By learning to embrace these feelings, we open ourselves to new possibilities and ways of being.

Harnessing insecurity:

  • Recognize insecurity as a natural part of growth and change
  • Use moments of uncertainty as opportunities for self-reflection
  • Cultivate curiosity about the unknown rather than fear
  • Practice staying present with uncomfortable feelings without trying to escape them

5. Develop compassionate abiding with difficult emotions

Compassionate abiding provides a way to no longer invest our reactions with so much absolute truth.

Sitting with discomfort. Compassionate abiding is the practice of staying present with difficult emotions without getting caught up in them. This approach allows us to experience our feelings fully without being controlled by them.

Steps for compassionate abiding:

  1. Identify the emotion you're experiencing
  2. Breathe into the feeling, inviting it in rather than pushing it away
  3. Observe the sensation in your body without judgment
  4. Recognize the impermanence of the emotion
  5. Extend compassion to yourself and others who may be experiencing similar feelings

6. Transform pain into a catalyst for awakening

According to the Buddhist teachings, difficulty is inevitable in human life. For one thing, we cannot escape the reality of death. But there are also the realities of aging, of illness, of not getting what we want, and of getting what we don't want.

Embracing life's challenges. Pain and difficulty are inevitable aspects of human existence. However, these experiences can be powerful teachers and catalysts for spiritual growth when approached with the right mindset.

Using pain as a teacher:

  • Recognize suffering as a universal human experience
  • Look for lessons and opportunities for growth in difficult situations
  • Cultivate empathy for others by acknowledging shared struggles
  • Use challenging experiences to deepen your spiritual practice and self-understanding

7. Choose to feed the right wolf within us

The one that wins will be the one I choose to feed.

The power of choice. Within each of us, there are conflicting tendencies towards both kindness and aggression. The quality we nurture through our thoughts and actions is the one that will ultimately prevail.

Nurturing positive qualities:

  • Consciously choose to cultivate kindness, compassion, and understanding
  • Practice mindfulness to become aware of your thoughts and reactions
  • Regularly engage in activities that promote peace and well-being
  • Surround yourself with positive influences and like-minded individuals

8. Use pausing as a tool for mindfulness and change

Pausing is very helpful in this process. It creates a momentary contrast between being completely self-absorbed and being awake and present.

The transformative pause. Taking brief moments throughout the day to pause and become present can significantly impact our mental state and behavior. These pauses create space for more conscious choices and reactions.

Implementing the pause:

  • Set reminders throughout the day to take three conscious breaths
  • Use daily activities (e.g., opening a door, answering the phone) as cues to pause
  • During conflicts or intense emotions, pause before responding
  • Practice short meditation sessions to strengthen your ability to be present

9. Access natural intelligence, warmth, and openness

Natural intelligence, natural warmth, and natural openness. When I say that the potential for goodness exists in all beings, that is acknowledging that everyone, everywhere, all over the globe, has these qualities and can call on them to help themselves and others.

Innate positive qualities. Every human being possesses natural intelligence, warmth, and openness. These qualities are always accessible, even if they're sometimes obscured by habitual patterns or strong emotions.

Cultivating innate goodness:

  • Practice self-reflection to become more aware of your inherent wisdom
  • Engage in loving-kindness meditation to nurture your natural warmth
  • Approach situations with curiosity to tap into your innate openness
  • Recognize these qualities in others to foster connection and understanding

Last updated:

Review Summary

4.37 out of 5
Average of 1k+ ratings from Goodreads and Amazon.

Practicing Peace in Times of War is highly praised for its concise yet profound wisdom on cultivating inner peace and compassion. Readers appreciate Chödrön's accessible Buddhist teachings, practical advice on dealing with difficult emotions, and emphasis on personal transformation as a path to global peace. Many find the book's small size deceptive, as it contains powerful insights applicable to daily life. While some reviewers note repetition or disagree with certain points, most find the book deeply impactful and recommend it for its timeless relevance.

Your rating:

About the Author

Ani Pema Chödrön, born Deirdre Blomfield-Brown, is an American Buddhist nun in the Tibetan tradition. She became a novice nun in 1974 and received full ordination in 1981. Chödrön studied with Lama Chime Rinpoche and Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche, whom she considered her root guru. She has served as director of Karma Dzong in Boulder, Colorado, and Gampo Abbey in Nova Scotia. Chödrön is known for her teachings and writings that make Buddhist concepts accessible to Western audiences. She continues to teach in North America and spends time in solitary retreat under the guidance of Venerable Dzigar Kongtrul Rinpoche.

Other books by Pema Chödrön

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