Key Takeaways
1. Master the Art of Asking for More Than You Expect
"Effectiveness at the conference table depends upon overstating one's demands."
Bracket your objective. When negotiating, always ask for more than you expect to get. This technique, known as bracketing, involves making an initial proposal that is an equal distance on the other side of your objective as their proposal. For example, if you want to buy a car for $13,000 and the dealer is asking $15,000, make an opening offer of $11,000. This strategy gives you room to negotiate and increases the perceived value of your offer.
Create a win-win perception. By asking for more, you set up a climate where the other person can feel they've won in the negotiations. This approach allows you to make concessions during the negotiation while still achieving your desired outcome. Remember, the essence of Power Negotiating is to always leave the other side thinking they've won.
Benefits of asking for more:
- You might just get it
- It gives you negotiating room
- It raises the perceived value of your offer
- It prevents negotiation deadlock
- It creates a climate where the other side feels they've won
2. Understand and Leverage Negotiation Gambits
"Power Negotiators know that negotiating is more of a science than an art."
Master the gambits. Negotiation gambits are strategic moves that involve some risk but can significantly influence the outcome of a negotiation. These include techniques such as the "Vise" technique, where you respond to a proposal with "You'll have to do better than that," and then remain silent. This puts pressure on the other party to improve their offer.
Counter effectively. Understanding these gambits also means knowing how to counter them when they're used against you. For example, when faced with the "Good Guy/Bad Guy" routine, identify it openly to diffuse its effectiveness. Say, "Oh, come on—you aren't going to play Good Guy/Bad Guy with me, are you?"
Key negotiation gambits:
- The Vise technique
- Flinching at proposals
- The Reluctant Seller/Buyer
- Good Guy/Bad Guy
- Nibbling
- The Higher Authority
- The Trade-off
3. Harness the Power of Time Pressure and Information
"Eighty percent of the concessions occur in the last 20 percent of time available."
Use time strategically. Time pressure can be a powerful tool in negotiations. People become more flexible under time constraints, often making concessions they wouldn't otherwise make. However, be cautious about revealing your own deadlines, as this can be used against you.
Gather critical information. Information is power in negotiations. Always strive to know more about the other side's position, needs, and constraints than they know about yours. Ask open-ended questions, listen carefully, and don't be afraid to admit when you don't know something.
Tactics for using time and information:
- Never reveal your deadline
- Create artificial deadlines for the other side
- Use the "silent close" technique
- Probe for information with open-ended questions
- Listen more than you speak
- Research the other party thoroughly before negotiating
4. Develop Personal Power in Negotiations
"Power itself is independent of its use."
Understand power sources. Personal power in negotiations comes from various sources, including legitimate power (from titles or position), reward power, coercive power, reverent power (from consistent values), charismatic power, expertise power, situation power, and information power. Recognizing and developing these power sources can significantly enhance your negotiating position.
Project confidence. Confidence is key in negotiations. Even if you feel intimidated, act as if you have the upper hand. Remember that each side typically thinks they have the weaker position because they're aware of their own pressures but not the other side's.
Types of personal power:
- Legitimate power
- Reward power
- Coercive power
- Reverent power
- Charismatic power
- Expertise power
- Situation power
- Information power
5. Read and Use Body Language Effectively
"As much as 80 percent of the reaction that people have to what is going on in the negotiation can be non-verbal."
Observe carefully. Pay close attention to the other party's body language, including facial expressions, posture, and gestures. These non-verbal cues can reveal much about their true feelings and intentions, often contradicting their words.
Control your own signals. Be aware of your own body language and use it strategically. Maintain open postures, make appropriate eye contact, and use mirroring techniques to build rapport. Remember that people believe what they see more readily than what they hear.
Key body language signals:
- Eye contact and blink rate
- Hand gestures and positions
- Posture and body orientation
- Facial expressions
- Personal space (proxemics)
6. Cultivate the Characteristics of a Power Negotiator
"Negotiating is always a two-way affair."
Develop key traits. Power Negotiators possess certain characteristics that set them apart. These include the courage to probe for more information, patience to outlast the other negotiator, integrity to press for win-win solutions, and the willingness to be a good listener.
Adopt winning attitudes. Successful negotiators have specific attitudes that contribute to their success. These include the willingness to live with ambiguity, resilience in the face of setbacks, a competitive spirit, and the ability to not be conflict-averse.
Characteristics of Power Negotiators:
- Courage to ask tough questions
- Patience to outlast opponents
- Integrity in seeking win-win solutions
- Excellent listening skills
- Comfort with ambiguity
- Resilience and competitiveness
- Ability to handle conflict
7. Navigate Cultural Differences in International Negotiations
"Americans focus on getting the contract signed."
Understand cultural nuances. When negotiating internationally, be aware of cultural differences in negotiation styles, communication patterns, and business practices. For example, while Americans tend to be direct and focus on getting the deal done quickly, many other cultures prioritize building relationships before discussing business.
Adapt your approach. Flexibility is key in international negotiations. Be prepared to adjust your tactics based on the cultural context. This might mean spending more time on small talk, being more or less direct in your communication, or adapting to different concepts of time and deadlines.
Key cultural considerations:
- High-context vs. low-context communication styles
- Importance of relationship-building
- Attitudes towards time and deadlines
- Decision-making processes
- Use of silence in negotiations
- Attitudes towards contracts and agreements
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Review Summary
Secrets of Power Negotiating receives mostly positive reviews for its practical negotiation techniques and strategies. Readers appreciate the actionable advice, real-world examples, and clear explanations of negotiation tactics. Many find it helpful for both business and personal situations. Some criticize the author's tone and occasionally unethical suggestions. The book is praised for its comprehensive coverage of negotiation topics, including cross-cultural considerations and personality types. While some find it repetitive or overly long, most readers consider it a valuable resource for improving negotiation skills.
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