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Skills in Existential Counselling & Psychotherapy

Skills in Existential Counselling & Psychotherapy

by Emmy Van Deurzen 2011 176 pages
4.32
100+ ratings
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Key Takeaways

1. Existential therapy focuses on human existence and personal meaning

"Existential therapy is a contemporary form of practical and applied philosophy that seeks to assist people in acquiring the wisdom to understand and live their lives with greater awareness and understanding."

Essence of existence. Existential therapy is rooted in the belief that human beings are constantly engaged in the process of becoming. It emphasizes that existence precedes essence, meaning we are not born with a predetermined nature but instead create ourselves through our choices and actions. This approach encourages clients to explore their unique way of being-in-the-world and to discover personal meaning in their lives.

Practical application. Unlike therapies that focus on symptom reduction or behavioral change, existential therapy aims to help clients confront the fundamental questions of human existence:

  • What does it mean to be alive?
  • How can I live a worthwhile life?
  • What is my purpose?
  • How do I face death and create meaning?

By grappling with these questions, clients can develop a more authentic and purposeful way of living, taking responsibility for their choices and embracing the freedom to shape their lives.

2. Phenomenology is the cornerstone of existential therapeutic practice

"Phenomenology aims to clarify the assumptions we make about the world and our part in it in order that we may see ourselves, the world and our relationship with it more accurately."

Descriptive approach. Phenomenology, as applied in existential therapy, involves a systematic exploration of the client's lived experience. This method emphasizes description over explanation, encouraging clients to articulate their experiences without immediately jumping to interpretations or judgments. The therapist's role is to facilitate this process by:

  • Asking open-ended questions
  • Encouraging detailed descriptions
  • Helping clients identify and bracket their assumptions
  • Exploring the multiple dimensions of experience (physical, social, personal, spiritual)

Uncovering meaning. Through this phenomenological exploration, clients can uncover hidden meanings and patterns in their lives. This process helps them gain a clearer understanding of their worldview, values, and the ways they create meaning. By becoming more aware of their assumptions and biases, clients can make more conscious choices about how they want to live.

3. The four dimensions of existence shape our worldview and challenges

"The four dimensions are represented in Figure 1.1 as concentric spheres. The outer layer represents the physical dimension; the layer below this covers the social dimension, followed by the inner space of the personal dimension with inside it the spiritual core."

Holistic perspective. Existential therapy recognizes four interconnected dimensions of human existence:

  1. Physical (Umwelt): Our relationship with the natural world, our body, and mortality
  2. Social (Mitwelt): Our interactions with others and our place in society
  3. Personal (Eigenwelt): Our sense of self, identity, and inner world
  4. Spiritual (Überwelt): Our values, beliefs, and search for meaning

Existential challenges. Each dimension presents unique challenges and dilemmas:

  • Physical: Confronting mortality and bodily limitations
  • Social: Balancing connection and individuality
  • Personal: Developing authenticity and self-awareness
  • Spiritual: Finding meaning and purpose in life

By exploring these dimensions, clients can gain a more comprehensive understanding of their existence and the challenges they face, leading to a more balanced and fulfilling life.

4. Authenticity and inauthenticity are central to existential living

"Authenticity cannot be standardized or normalized."

Embracing authenticity. In existential therapy, authenticity refers to living in accordance with one's true self and values, rather than conforming to societal expectations or hiding behind false personas. It involves:

  • Taking responsibility for one's choices and actions
  • Being honest with oneself and others
  • Embracing one's freedom and potential
  • Facing life's challenges with courage and openness

Recognizing inauthenticity. Inauthenticity, on the other hand, is characterized by:

  • Avoiding responsibility
  • Living according to others' expectations
  • Denying one's freedom and potential
  • Evading life's challenges and difficult emotions

The goal of existential therapy is to help clients recognize inauthentic patterns in their lives and move towards more authentic ways of being. This process often involves confronting anxiety and uncertainty, as authenticity requires facing the ambiguity and complexity of human existence.

5. Relationships and dialogue are fundamental to existential therapy

"Dialogue involves openness to alternatives, which have not yet been considered while keeping the wider picture in mind."

Therapeutic relationship. Existential therapy emphasizes the importance of the relationship between therapist and client. This relationship serves as a microcosm of the client's broader relational patterns and provides an opportunity for authentic encounter. Key aspects of the therapeutic relationship include:

  • Mutual respect and collaboration
  • Open and honest communication
  • Exploration of the client's way of being-with-others
  • Recognition of the therapist's and client's shared humanity

Dialogical approach. The therapy process is characterized by genuine dialogue, where both therapist and client engage in a mutual exploration of the client's existence. This dialogue aims to:

  • Uncover hidden assumptions and beliefs
  • Explore alternative perspectives
  • Encourage self-reflection and personal growth
  • Foster a deeper understanding of oneself and others

Through this dialogical process, clients can develop more authentic and meaningful relationships in their lives.

6. Existential therapy addresses life's paradoxes and dilemmas

"Life is a mystery to be lived, not a problem to be solved."

Embracing complexity. Existential therapy recognizes that life is inherently complex and often paradoxical. It encourages clients to embrace this complexity rather than seeking simplistic solutions. Common paradoxes explored in therapy include:

  • Freedom vs. responsibility
  • Connection vs. isolation
  • Meaning vs. meaninglessness
  • Certainty vs. uncertainty

Navigating dilemmas. Instead of providing ready-made answers, existential therapists help clients navigate life's dilemmas by:

  • Exploring multiple perspectives
  • Recognizing the tension between opposing forces
  • Developing tolerance for ambiguity
  • Finding creative ways to live with paradox

By learning to embrace life's paradoxes and navigate its dilemmas, clients can develop greater resilience and flexibility in facing life's challenges.

7. The therapist's self-awareness and personal growth are crucial

"Existential therapists are aware that they are first and foremost human beings and are therefore susceptible to human flaws, imperfections, blind spots, conflicts and dilemmas."

Therapist as human. Existential therapy recognizes that therapists are not immune to life's challenges and existential concerns. This awareness is crucial for effective therapeutic practice and involves:

  • Ongoing self-reflection and personal growth
  • Willingness to confront one's own existential anxieties
  • Recognition of personal biases and limitations
  • Commitment to authenticity in the therapeutic relationship

Continuous development. Existential therapists are encouraged to engage in:

  • Personal therapy
  • Supervision
  • Philosophical study
  • Exploration of diverse life experiences

This ongoing personal and professional development enables therapists to better understand and empathize with their clients' struggles while maintaining appropriate boundaries and ethical practice.

8. Existential approach is adaptable to various therapeutic contexts

"Existential therapy can be adapted to fit the time available."

Flexibility in practice. The existential approach can be applied in various therapeutic settings and formats, including:

  • Short-term and long-term therapy
  • Individual, couple, and group therapy
  • Online and face-to-face sessions
  • Different cultural contexts

Core principles maintained. Regardless of the specific context, existential therapists maintain core principles such as:

  • Phenomenological exploration
  • Focus on personal meaning and values
  • Emphasis on freedom and responsibility
  • Attention to the four dimensions of existence

This adaptability allows existential therapy to be integrated into diverse therapeutic practices and settings while maintaining its philosophical integrity.

9. Working with emotions is key to existential self-understanding

"Emotions are the ebb and flow of human experience, with currents and undercurrents and cross-currents."

Emotional compass. Existential therapy views emotions as essential guides to understanding one's values and relationship to the world. Key aspects of working with emotions include:

  • Recognizing emotions as signals of what matters to us
  • Exploring the full range of emotional experiences
  • Understanding emotions in the context of life's challenges and paradoxes
  • Developing emotional intelligence and resilience

Beyond categorization. Rather than labeling emotions as positive or negative, existential therapy encourages clients to:

  • Embrace the complexity of emotional experiences
  • Explore the meanings behind their emotions
  • Develop a more nuanced understanding of their emotional landscape
  • Use emotions as a guide for authentic living and decision-making

By working with emotions in this way, clients can gain deeper insights into their values, desires, and ways of being-in-the-world.

10. Existential therapy embraces life's uncertainties and possibilities

"Life is continually unfolding there can be no point at which any therapy can be said to have finished – it can only ever be enough for the time being."

Accepting uncertainty. Existential therapy recognizes that life is inherently uncertain and that we can never have complete control or knowledge. This approach encourages clients to:

  • Embrace the unknown aspects of life
  • Develop courage in the face of uncertainty
  • Find meaning and purpose within life's ambiguities
  • Recognize the ongoing nature of personal growth and change

Exploring possibilities. While acknowledging life's limitations, existential therapy also emphasizes the importance of recognizing and embracing life's possibilities. This involves:

  • Expanding one's awareness of available choices
  • Encouraging creative approaches to life's challenges
  • Fostering a sense of openness to new experiences
  • Developing the courage to pursue meaningful goals despite uncertainty

By learning to navigate the tension between uncertainty and possibility, clients can develop a more flexible and resilient approach to life, embracing both its challenges and opportunities for growth.

Last updated:

Review Summary

4.32 out of 5
Average of 100+ ratings from Goodreads and Amazon.

Skills in Existential Counselling & Psychotherapy receives mostly positive reviews, with an overall rating of 4.34/5. Readers appreciate its engaging content, philosophical depth, and practical applications for therapists. The book is praised for its exploration of existential themes and its unique British approach to existential psychology. Some readers find it repetitive and superficial in parts, while others value its exercises and examples. The book is considered a foundational text for existential therapy, offering insights into phenomenology, ontology, and the meaning of life.

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About the Author

Emmy van Deurzen, born in 1951 in The Hague, is an influential existential therapist and honorary Professor at the University of Sheffield. After moving to the UK in 1977, she founded the Society for Existential Analysis and established training programs in existential psychotherapy. Van Deurzen created The New School of Psychotherapy and Counselling in 1996, which is now located in South Hampstead, London. Her therapeutic approach is rooted in existential philosophy and focuses on helping individuals reflect on their lives, considering past, present, and future equally. She emphasizes the importance of recognizing personal strengths and limitations while facing life's challenges.

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