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The Blink of an Eye

The Blink of an Eye

A Memoir of Dying—and Learning How to Live Again
by Rikke Schmidt Kjærgaard 2019 239 pages
4.14
100+ ratings
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Key Takeaways

1. A Sudden Battle with Death: From New Year's Celebration to Coma

My death could not have been predicted. It came suddenly. I was my usual self the day before.

Unexpected illness strikes. On New Year's Day, Rikke Schmidt Kjærgaard, a healthy scientist and mother of three, suddenly fell critically ill. What began as flu-like symptoms rapidly escalated into a life-threatening condition. Within hours, she was rushed to the hospital, her heart stopped, and she slipped into a coma.

Bacterial infection ravages the body. Rikke was diagnosed with pneumococcal meningitis, a severe bacterial infection that attacked her brain and body. The infection caused:

  • Multiple blood clots in her brain
  • Organ failure
  • Paralysis
  • Gangrene in her extremities

Her survival chances were slim, and doctors prepared her family for the worst. This sudden transition from celebrating the new year to fighting for life underscores the fragility of health and the unpredictable nature of severe illness.

2. The Power of Family Support in Critical Illness

Peter was by my side the entire time, keeping track of my treatment and any iota of change in my condition.

Unwavering presence. Throughout Rikke's coma and lengthy hospital stay, her husband Peter remained a constant presence. He spent every waking hour by her side, advocating for her care, and bridging communication between medical staff and family.

Children's resilience. Rikke's children showed remarkable strength:

  • Johan (18) and Victoria (14) balanced school with hospital visits
  • Daniel (8) struggled to understand but remained hopeful
  • They read to their mother, shared their daily lives, and maintained a sense of normalcy

The family's dedication played a crucial role in Rikke's recovery, providing emotional support and motivation during her darkest moments. Their experience highlights the vital role of family in a patient's recovery journey and the profound impact of illness on the entire family unit.

3. Awakening from Coma: Relearning Basic Functions

There are no Hollywood moments in waking from a coma. When you imagine it, you think of someone waking up, asking, "What happened? What did I miss? What am I doing here?" But in real life, in real hospitals, waking up is a process, a fragmented jumble of impressions, lights, and sounds.

Gradual awakening. Emerging from a coma is not a sudden event but a slow, disorienting process. Rikke experienced:

  • Fragmented consciousness
  • Confusion and memory loss
  • Inability to move or communicate effectively

Relearning everything. Upon waking, Rikke had to relearn basic functions:

  • Breathing independently
  • Swallowing and eating
  • Controlling bodily functions
  • Moving her limbs

This process was physically and emotionally exhausting, requiring intense therapy and patience. Rikke's experience shatters common misconceptions about coma recovery, revealing the challenging reality of rebuilding one's ability to interact with the world.

4. Communication Breakthroughs: Blinking, Spelling, and Speaking

One blink for no. Two for yes. I guess she figured that the likely answer to most questions was no.

Innovative communication. Unable to speak or move, Rikke initially communicated through a simple blinking system: one blink for no, two for yes. This basic method allowed her to express her needs and feelings.

Progressive methods. As Rikke regained more control, her communication abilities expanded:

  • Using a spelling board to form words and sentences
  • Mouthing words for lip-reading
  • Gradually regaining speech with a speaking valve

Each breakthrough in communication was a significant milestone in Rikke's recovery, allowing her to reconnect with her family and assert her needs and personality. These steps were crucial in maintaining her sense of self and agency during her recovery.

5. The Challenging Journey of Physical Rehabilitation

Doing so required a team of specialists trained to shift my limbs gently without doing any damage. I was assigned a physiotherapist and an occupational therapist.

Intensive therapy. Rikke's physical rehabilitation was a grueling process that began even while she was in a coma. It involved:

  • Passive movement exercises to prevent muscle atrophy
  • Gradual progression to active exercises as she regained consciousness
  • Learning to sit up, stand, and eventually walk again
  • Occupational therapy to regain fine motor skills

Small victories, big impact. Every small achievement was celebrated:

  • Sitting up for a few seconds
  • Taking first steps with support
  • Regaining the ability to eat and drink independently

The rehabilitation process was physically demanding and emotionally challenging, requiring immense determination and resilience. It underscored the importance of specialized care and personalized therapy in recovering from severe neurological damage.

6. Confronting Loss: Amputated Fingers and Altered Self-Image

I looked at my impossible hands, useless black claws, and I cried with my entire body, as if every single molecule was unhappy.

Physical loss. Due to gangrene caused by her illness, Rikke had to have most of her fingers amputated. This loss was both physical and emotional:

  • Grieving for her lost abilities
  • Facing a changed body image
  • Adapting to new limitations in daily activities

Psychological adaptation. Accepting and adapting to her changed body was a significant part of Rikke's recovery:

  • Learning to use her hands in new ways
  • Overcoming self-consciousness about her appearance
  • Finding new methods to perform tasks she once took for granted

This experience highlights the profound impact of physical changes on one's sense of self and the resilience required to adapt to a new normal. It also underscores the importance of both physical and psychological support in recovering from life-altering injuries.

7. Returning Home: Rediscovering Independence and Joy in Simple Things

After 153 days, I'm home!

Homecoming challenges. Returning home after months in the hospital was both joyous and daunting for Rikke:

  • Adjusting to life without constant medical supervision
  • Relearning to navigate her home environment
  • Balancing the desire for independence with physical limitations

Rediscovering life's pleasures. Rikke found renewed appreciation for simple aspects of daily life:

  • The comfort of her own bed
  • Familiar sounds and smells of home
  • Time spent with family in a relaxed setting

This transition marked a significant milestone in Rikke's recovery, symbolizing her return to a more normal life. It also highlighted the challenges of adapting to home life after prolonged hospitalization and the importance of continued support during this transition.

8. Building a New Community: Finding Connection in Shared Experiences

We had all been there, on the other side of the tubes and wires, looking up from the bed. We had seen and felt the alarm and distress of our friends and relatives, breathed in the serious air of the doctors, the bustle of the nurses.

Unexpected bonds. Through her rehabilitation, Rikke found a new community of people who shared similar experiences:

  • Fellow patients in physical therapy
  • Neighbors who had faced serious illnesses
  • Support groups for those recovering from near-death experiences

Shared understanding. This community provided unique support:

  • A space to discuss challenges without judgment
  • Shared humor about their new limitations
  • Motivation and inspiration from others' progress

This newfound community played a crucial role in Rikke's emotional recovery, providing a sense of belonging and understanding that even well-meaning family and friends couldn't fully offer. It highlights the importance of peer support in the recovery process from life-altering illnesses.

9. Embracing Life with a Renewed Perspective

I had received a gift: the gift of appreciation, of not wasting all the everyday adventures that are right in front of us. The gift of making every single day count.

Heightened appreciation. Rikke's near-death experience fundamentally changed her outlook on life:

  • Finding joy in small, everyday moments
  • Appreciating physical abilities previously taken for granted
  • Valuing relationships and connections more deeply

New empathy and awareness. Her experience also broadened her perspective:

  • Increased empathy for others facing challenges
  • Greater awareness of accessibility issues in society
  • A desire to share her story to inspire and educate others

This renewed perspective on life represents a profound personal growth arising from Rikke's harrowing experience. It demonstrates how facing mortality can lead to a more mindful, appreciative approach to living, and a desire to contribute positively to the world based on one's unique experiences.

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Review Summary

4.14 out of 5
Average of 100+ ratings from Goodreads and Amazon.

The Blink of an Eye is a compelling memoir about Rikke Schmidt Kjærgaard's battle with bacterial meningitis. Readers found her account of being "locked in" and her subsequent recovery inspiring and eye-opening. The book offers valuable insights into the patient experience and the importance of family support during medical crises. While some readers found the writing style clipped or tedious, most praised its honesty and impact. Many were moved by Kjærgaard's resilience and her ability to find meaning in her near-death experience.

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About the Author

Rikke Schmidt Kjærgaard is a Danish scientist who survived a life-threatening bout of bacterial meningitis in 2013. Her experience of being in a coma, becoming "locked in," and slowly recovering inspired her to write this memoir. Kjærgaard's scientific background informs her detailed account of her medical journey. Despite losing most of her fingers and sight in one eye, she has made a remarkable recovery. She now uses her story to raise awareness about bacterial infections and locked-in syndrome, and to inspire others facing medical challenges. Kjærgaard's resilience and positive outlook have made her an inspirational figure.

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