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The Empowered Empath

The Empowered Empath

A Simple Guide on Setting Boundaries, Controlling Your Emotions, and Making Life Easier
by Judy Dyer 2019 137 pages
3.93
500+ ratings
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Key Takeaways

1. Embrace Empathy as a Gift, Not a Curse

Empathy is not something you can escape from—you either embrace it and use it the way it was intended or live a life of misery and suffering.

Reframing empathy. Empathy, the ability to feel others' emotions, is often seen as a burden, leading to feelings of sadness, sickness, and loneliness. However, it's essential to shift this perspective and recognize empathy as a gift. By learning to use empathic abilities effectively, empaths can transform their lives from misery and suffering to healthy living and empowerment.

The piano analogy. Just as a child with a natural talent for the piano needs to study music to master their craft, empaths need to develop skills to enhance their gift. Ignoring or misusing empathic abilities can lead to a dark place, while enhancing them can lead to exceptional achievements. This involves understanding interpersonal dynamics and connecting with others to learn and grow.

Divine appointments. The journey to becoming an empowered empath is not a coincidence but a divine appointment. It requires stepping into a new level of empowerment and clarity, which can be achieved by embracing empathy and using it for good. This involves recognizing the potential for growth and transformation that comes with this unique ability.

2. Understand and Manage Your Energy

A skilled empath knows how to protect themselves by being fully aware of what is taking place around them and being present so that no one is able to enter their energy field without their permission.

Energy awareness. Empaths possess a heightened understanding of energy, often sensing it more acutely than verbal communication. This ability allows them to detect lies and understand the true intentions of others, regardless of language barriers. However, this sensitivity also makes them vulnerable to negativity, which can drain their energy field.

Controlling influences. Empaths have the power to choose who and what influences their energy. Thoughts are powerful and can be picked up by others, giving empaths the ability to read minds. By being fully aware and present, empaths can protect themselves and prevent unwanted entry into their energy field.

Energy as a drug. Energy, if not protected, can become reckless and attach itself to any other energy circulating in the atmosphere. This can lead to addiction and a loss of control. Therefore, it's crucial for empaths to use their energy wisely, understanding that whatever they put out into the world will come back to them.

3. Shield Yourself from Negativity

To survive as an empath, it’s crucial to learn how to ground yourself in overstimulating situations and protect yourself against other people’s negative energy.

The dark side. While empathy is a gift, it can become a curse if not properly understood and controlled. Constantly feeling the stress and pain of others can lead to serious health problems, including headaches, back pain, digestive issues, anxiety, chronic depression, a weak immune system, and chronic fatigue. This is due to the neurological and biological makeup of empaths, which absorbs emotions on a large scale.

Social vulnerabilities. Empaths are often taken advantage of due to their compassionate nature, attracting sociopaths, narcissists, and manipulative individuals. Sociopaths, lacking emotions themselves, are drawn to the highly emotional nature of empaths, luring them in through subtle gestures and body language. This makes it difficult for empaths to make personal choices, as they constantly worry about the impact of their decisions on others.

Coping strategies. To cope with being an empath, it's essential to embrace creativity, seek independent living, and practice daily yoga. Creative expression helps eliminate negative energy, while independent living allows empaths to separate their identity from the emotions of others. Daily yoga, with its combination of postures, deep breathing, and relaxation, releases tension and blocked energy.

4. Assertiveness: Your Empathic Superpower

Assertiveness is a powerful quality to have, and even more so if you are an empath.

The need for assertiveness. Empaths, known for their kindness, often neglect their own needs, understanding the negative impact of conflict on their energy. This can lead them to avoid conflict, even when their beliefs are challenged, making them targets for manipulators. Assertiveness becomes a crucial quality, ensuring they stand up for themselves and prevent others from taking advantage.

Standing up for yourself. The average person may not understand empaths, sometimes labeling them as mentally challenged. This judgment can lead empaths to feel ashamed of their gift, keeping quiet about it. However, empaths should embrace their ability and be proud of it, educating themselves to confidently explain it to others.

Expressing needs. Because empaths are compassionate and eager to help, people often confide in them, leading to emotional drain. Letting others know what you need positively affects your energy field. It may feel uncomfortable initially, but realizing how much better it makes you feel will ease the process.

5. Emotional Mastery: Taking Control

Living as an empath is like being on a constant emotional roller coaster.

Emotional roller coaster. Life as an empath can feel like a constant emotional roller coaster, with rapid shifts in thoughts and feelings that can be overwhelming. However, it is possible to control these emotions and avoid living in a state of constant turmoil. This involves understanding the sources of these emotions and developing strategies to manage them.

Managing expectations. As an empath, you may have strong feelings and the ability to tune into others' thoughts, which can lead to overthinking and disappointment. It's important to remember that not everyone will share the same level of compassion or agree with your perspectives. Accepting this reality can make life easier and prevent unnecessary disappointment.

Restoring energy. One of the negative effects of being an empath is a constant loss of energy. Techniques such as acupuncture, mantras, and palliative care can help restore energy levels. Acupuncture balances vital energy, mantras reinforce positive self-perception, and palliative arts provide creative outlets for emotional expression.

6. Boundaries: The Foundation of Self-Care

Empaths find it difficult to set boundaries because they don’t like to upset, hurt, or offend anyone.

The importance of boundaries. Empaths often struggle to set boundaries, fearing they will upset or offend others. This can lead to people taking advantage of their kindness. Boundaries are essential for protecting empaths from being drained and ensuring they value themselves.

What are boundaries? Boundaries are invisible lines that separate individuals, defining acceptable and unacceptable behavior. They create distance between your needs, feelings, and responsibilities and those of others. Without boundaries, empaths are often taken advantage of, becoming "yes, yes people" who can never say no.

Overcoming the fear. To overcome the fear of setting boundaries, empaths must recognize it as a healthy form of self-love. It's essential to understand your own needs, as well as to remember that you are not a therapist. Setting boundaries benefits everyone, creating clarity and respect in relationships.

7. Career Choices: Aligning with Your Empathic Nature

Empaths are valuable in any profession; however, you must find a career that supports your gifts, skills, and temperament.

Thriving careers. Empaths often thrive in careers that allow them to work alone, in low-stress environments, or for smaller companies. They prefer jobs that offer flexibility, such as working from home, where they can avoid the chaos of an office and set their own schedules. Self-employment is also a popular choice, allowing them to express their creativity and intuition.

Careers to avoid. Certain careers can be particularly draining for empaths, such as sales, mainstream corporate roles, and high-stress positions like firefighters or police officers. These jobs often involve constant interaction with people, high sensory stimulation, and emotionally taxing situations that can overwhelm sensitive individuals. It's important to choose a career that aligns with your empathic nature to avoid burnout and protect your energy.

Handling disciplinary action. Being an empath can be both a strength and a challenge in leadership roles. While empathy allows you to connect with employees and understand their emotions, it can also make it difficult to take disciplinary action. Preparing beforehand, knowing HR policies, and being firm yet empathetic are key to handling these situations effectively.

8. Find Peace in a Cruel World

You become the change you want to see.

Acknowledge the cruelty. There's no denying the world can be a cruel place, filled with war, murder, and hatred. Constantly focusing on this negativity can be incredibly depressing, especially for empaths who are highly sensitive to the suffering of others. However, it's important to remember that there are also many good things happening in the world.

Become the change. Instead of getting overwhelmed by the wickedness, choose to become the change you want to see. Radiate love every day, whether to friends, family, or strangers. Perform acts of kindness, no matter how small, to make a positive impact on the world around you.

Volunteer and give back. Volunteering is a great way to show kindness and give back to your community. It allows you to focus on others and put their needs before your own, which comes naturally to empaths. Volunteering also helps to create social cohesion, bringing communities together and uniting people from different backgrounds.

Last updated:

Review Summary

3.93 out of 5
Average of 500+ ratings from Goodreads and Amazon.

The Empowered Empath receives mixed reviews, with an average rating of 3.93 out of 5. Some readers find it helpful and insightful, praising its practical advice on setting boundaries and managing empathic abilities. Others criticize it for being basic, lacking scientific backing, and potentially misleading. Critics argue that the book oversimplifies complex issues and makes generalizations about empaths. Positive reviews appreciate the book's guidance on self-care and energy management, while negative reviews point out concerns about the author's stance on medical treatments and therapy.

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About the Author

Judy Dyer is an author dedicated to helping empaths understand and harness their natural abilities. She draws from her personal experiences and extensive research to write books that explore the benefits and challenges of being an empath. Dyer's work aims to provide practical guidance and support for those who are highly sensitive to others' emotions. She encourages readers to embrace their empathic gifts while learning to set boundaries and protect their energy. Dyer welcomes interaction with her audience and invites readers to contact her via email, demonstrating her commitment to fostering a supportive community for empaths.

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