Key Takeaways
1. Recognize self-importance as the root of all suffering
"All the suffering we have ever experienced, all that we experience now, and all that we will experience in the future, come from self-importance."
Self-importance is the enemy. Our attachment to a small, separate self is the source of all our pain and problems. This self-centered mindset manifests as the "five poisons" of attachment, aggression, jealousy, arrogance, and stupidity. By continually indulging our ego, we perpetuate a cycle of suffering for ourselves and others.
Recognize the illusion. The self we cling to so tightly doesn't actually exist in any solid way. When we examine our mind and body closely, we find no permanent, unchanging essence. Our sense of self is more like a useful fiction – necessary for functioning in the world, but ultimately empty of inherent existence.
Cultivate critical intelligence. Regularly reflect on how self-importance causes harm in your life and relationships. Notice how it leads to painful emotions, destructive actions, and missed opportunities for genuine connection and happiness. This awareness is the first step in loosening the grip of ego-clinging.
2. Practice tonglen: exchanging self for other
"The short answer is that we should do everything that it is right to do, as practitioners and as members of whatever community we find ourselves part of."
Reverse your habitual tendencies. Tonglen, or "giving and taking," is a powerful meditation practice for cultivating compassion and reducing self-centeredness. As you breathe in, imagine taking on the suffering of others. As you breathe out, send them your happiness and well-being.
Start with what's accessible. Begin by practicing with those closest to you – family, friends, and community members. Gradually expand your circle of compassion to include neutral people, difficult people, and eventually all sentient beings. Remember that all beings, just like you, want to be happy and free from suffering.
Apply tonglen in daily life. Beyond formal meditation, look for opportunities to practice exchanging self and other throughout your day:
- When you're in pain, think of others experiencing similar suffering
- When you're happy, wish for others to share in that joy
- In conflicts, try to see things from the other person's perspective
- Practice random acts of kindness without expectation of reward
3. Transform adversity into the path of enlightenment
"When we examine in this way, we realize we have no choice but to triumph over our obstacles. Our heart needs to triumph, because if it doesn't, we will be back in our ordinary state of self-importance."
Embrace difficulties as opportunities. When facing challenges, resist the urge to simply wish them away. Instead, view them as valuable chances to practice patience, compassion, and wisdom. Every obstacle can become fuel for your spiritual growth if approached with the right attitude.
Apply the three methods:
- Relative bodhicitta: Use adversity to increase your compassion for others who suffer
- Absolute bodhicitta: Recognize the empty, dreamlike nature of both pleasure and pain
- Special practices: Accumulate merit, confess wrongdoings, make offerings, and invoke support
Cultivate gratitude. Try to appreciate everyone and everything that comes into your life, even (and especially) the difficult people and situations. They are your greatest teachers on the path of awakening.
4. Cultivate bodhicitta: the mind of awakening
"When we see what's in our own mind, we're seeing what's in the world's mind as well. If what we see is suffering, that insight becomes compassion for the world."
Develop two aspects of bodhicitta:
- Relative: The aspiration to attain enlightenment for the benefit of all beings
- Absolute: Direct insight into the empty nature of all phenomena
Practice the four immeasurables:
- Loving-kindness: Wishing happiness for all beings
- Compassion: Wishing to free all beings from suffering
- Sympathetic joy: Rejoicing in the happiness and good fortune of others
- Equanimity: Maintaining a balanced, impartial attitude toward all beings
Make it a way of life. Infuse every action with the intention to benefit others. Dedicate the merit of your positive deeds to the enlightenment of all beings. Gradually expand your circle of care until it encompasses the entire universe.
5. Apply the five strengths in life and at death
"These strengths summarize the key points of practice as a unity of many essential instructions for practicing the holy dharma."
The five strengths for daily practice:
- Motivation: Set a clear intention to cultivate bodhicitta
- Familiarization: Train consistently in compassion and wisdom
- Virtuous seeds: Accumulate merit through positive actions
- Remorse: Recognize and overcome self-centered tendencies
- Aspiration: Dedicate all efforts to the benefit of all beings
Apply at the time of death:
- Give away possessions without attachment
- Make aspirational prayers for future lives
- Overcome fear through understanding emptiness
- Maintain bodhicitta as your core motivation
- Rest in the nature of mind beyond concepts
Prepare now. Don't wait until your deathbed to start this practice. Familiarize yourself with these strengths throughout your life so they'll be second nature when you need them most.
6. Train in absolute and relative bodhicitta
"Absolute bodhicitta will not arise in the mind streams of beginners. But relative bodhicitta, should they train in it, will surely be born."
Absolute bodhicitta practices:
- Consider all phenomena as dreamlike illusions
- Examine the unborn nature of awareness
- Rest in the alaya (ground consciousness)
- In post-meditation, maintain the view of emptiness
Relative bodhicitta practices:
- Meditate on the equality of self and other
- Practice tonglen (giving and taking)
- Transform the three poisons into virtues
- Apply bodhicitta in all daily activities
Balance the two. While absolute bodhicitta is the ultimate goal, most practitioners need to start with relative practices to develop compassion and reduce self-clinging. As your understanding deepens, the two aspects naturally complement and reinforce each other.
7. Embrace the commitments and guidelines of mind training
"Do not dwell in misunderstanding."
Key commitments:
- Always train in the three basic principles: uphold your vows, avoid inconsiderate actions, and abandon biased opinions
- Transform your attitude while remaining natural
- Do not speak about others' faults
- Do not be contentious or wait in ambush
- Do not transfer blame or exploit others' vulnerabilities
Essential guidelines:
- Use a single practice (bodhicitta) for everything
- Be patient with both immediate and long-term results
- Maintain your practice even when distracted
- Train wholeheartedly without sporadic effort
- Liberate yourself through both analysis and meditation
Measure your progress. Look for signs of decreasing self-importance and increasing compassion in your daily life. Rely on your own honest self-assessment rather than external praise or criticism.
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Review Summary
The Intelligent Heart receives high praise from readers for its accessible explanation of lojong teachings and Buddhist principles. Reviewers appreciate the author's gentle approach to addressing self-importance and fostering compassion. Many find the book insightful, practical, and applicable to contemporary Western contexts. Some readers note its value for understanding the bodhisattva vow and practicing tonglen. While most give it 5 stars, a few critics mention outdated aspects of Buddhism and writing style. Overall, readers recommend it for its wisdom and guidance in cultivating compassion and selflessness.
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