The Only Pirate at the Party

1. Embrace Your Uniqueness: The Pirate Attitude

The reason people said I would never succeed is the very reason I did succeed: because I am different.

Finding strength in difference. Lindsey Stirling's journey began with a learning disability that led to wearing an eye patch, which she transformed into a pirate persona. This embrace of her "weirdness" became a source of strength and a defining characteristic of her success. It's a reminder that what makes you different can be your greatest asset.

Rejecting limitations. The "pirate attitude" is about not taking orders or asking permission, especially when someone tells you that you're not good enough or your dreams are too lofty. It's about doing it anyway, defying expectations, and charting your own course. This mindset is crucial for anyone pursuing unconventional paths.

Authenticity over conformity. Stirling's story encourages readers to embrace their individuality rather than trying to fit in. It's about recognizing that being the "only pirate" can be hard, but it's also what makes you stand out and ultimately succeed.

2. Childhood Shapes Identity: Finding Your Stage

I was a natural-born drama queen, and my kindergarten classroom set the stage for one of my earliest impromptu performances.

Early performances. Stirling's natural inclination towards performance was evident from a young age, with her kindergarten classroom becoming the stage for her earliest impromptu performances. This highlights the importance of recognizing and nurturing innate talents and passions early on.

The power of imagination. Whether it was dressing up in costumes or turning a swing set into a pirate ship, Stirling's childhood was filled with imaginative play. This creativity fueled her artistic development and helped her overcome challenges, like wearing an eye patch.

Finding your stage. From kindergarten classrooms to amusement parks, Stirling's childhood experiences shaped her identity and set the stage for her future career. It's a reminder that every experience, even seemingly insignificant ones, can contribute to your personal and artistic growth.

3. Imagination and Resourcefulness: Turning Deprivation into Opportunity

I guess deep down I couldn’t relate that well to anyone who kept their toys in glass cases.

Making the most of limited resources. Stirling's family wasn't wealthy, but her parents fostered creativity and resourcefulness. This led to imaginative play with neighborhood friends, creating lemonade stands, and finding ways to earn money, even if it meant ironing shirts for a dollar each.

Imagination as a catalyst. Dawnee Ray, a childhood friend, played a significant role in sparking Stirling's imagination. Their shared experiences of deprivation led to creative moneymaking schemes and a unique perspective on the world.

Finding opportunity in limitations. Instead of complaining about what they didn't have, Stirling and her friends found ways to create their own opportunities. This entrepreneurial spirit and ability to turn limitations into advantages were crucial for their personal and artistic development.

4. Older Sisters: A Complex Relationship of Rivalry and Admiration

Although we weren’t the best of friends growing up, we did come together out of necessity on occasion.

Rivalry and support. Stirling's relationship with her older sister, Jennifer, was marked by both rivalry and admiration. While they often clashed, they also came together in moments of need, like covering up a hole in a bedroom door.

Secret admiration. Despite their differences, Stirling secretly admired Jennifer's running abilities and her determination to finish the state race, even after suffering a severe hyperventilation episode. This highlights the complex dynamics of sibling relationships, where rivalry can coexist with deep respect.

Teamwork and acceptance. Although they weren't always the best of friends, Stirling and Jennifer found ways to support each other, even if it was just to avoid getting in trouble. This underscores the importance of family bonds and the enduring power of sibling relationships.

5. Parental Sacrifices: The Unseen Foundation of Success

Looking back, I realize I should have felt shame for other reasons—like being embarrassed of a man who continued to drive a broken car so my sisters and I could go to our music lessons each week, and so that I could participate in a group like MYS.

Quiet sacrifices. Stirling's parents made numerous quiet sacrifices to support her musical aspirations, from driving a broken car to working in the high school cafeteria. These sacrifices often went unnoticed, but they formed the foundation of her success.

Appreciating the unseen. As Stirling got older, she began to recognize and appreciate the sacrifices her parents had made. This realization shifted her perspective and instilled a sense of gratitude for their unwavering support.

Karma and reward. Stirling's story suggests that acts of sacrifice and support often come full circle. Her parents' investment in her music eventually led to opportunities that benefited the entire family, like free admission to Disneyland.

6. The Inappropriate is Often the Path to Authenticity

I’ve always lived in fast-forward, and as a child I practiced my violin incessantly until I could play whatever song I was working on at warp speed.

Breaking the mold. Stirling's journey involved challenging conventional expectations and embracing the "inappropriate." This included playing the violin to rock music, dancing while playing, and going on tour with a rock band at a young age.

Finding your voice. Despite facing criticism and rejection, Stirling remained true to her artistic vision. This unwavering commitment to her unique style ultimately led to her success as a dancing violinist.

Embracing the unexpected. Stirling's story encourages readers to embrace the "inappropriate" and to challenge conventional norms. It's about finding your own voice and pursuing your passions, even if they don't fit neatly into established categories.

7. Faith as a Guiding Force: Navigating Life's Challenges

God loves you, and He knows you. That will give you strength.

Finding strength in faith. Stirling's Mormon faith played a significant role in her life, providing her with strength and guidance during challenging times, like her mission in New York. It was a source of comfort and a framework for making sense of the world.

Service and selflessness. Her mission forced her to find strength in her own testimony and to learn the importance of selfless service. This experience shaped her character and instilled a desire to help others, even when faced with rejection and adversity.

Balancing faith and art. Stirling's story highlights the challenges of navigating the entertainment industry while maintaining strong religious beliefs. It's about finding a way to integrate faith into your art and to use your platform to inspire others.

8. The Power of Collaboration: Finding Strength in Community

I was trying so hard to help other people, and someone ended up helping me.

Unexpected support. During her mission, Stirling found herself struggling and discouraged. It was a simple act of kindness from a stranger that gave her the strength to continue. This highlights the importance of human connection and the power of unexpected support.

Finding strength in community. From her roommates in college to her bandmates on tour, Stirling found strength and support in community. These relationships provided her with a sense of belonging and helped her overcome challenges.

The importance of mentorship. McKay Stevens, a fellow musician, played a significant role in Stirling's artistic development. He provided her with opportunities to perform and encouraged her to pursue her unique vision.

9. Eating Disorders: A Battle for Control and Self-Worth

Food was the one thing I could control, and now it’s controlling me.

The insidious nature of eating disorders. Stirling's struggle with anorexia highlights the insidious nature of eating disorders, which often begin as seemingly harmless attempts to control one's diet but can quickly spiral out of control.

The underlying issues. Eating disorders are often rooted in deeper issues of self-worth and control. For Stirling, her eating disorder became a way to cope with feelings of inadequacy and a desire to be perfect.

The path to recovery. Recovery from an eating disorder is a long and challenging process that requires professional help, self-compassion, and a strong support system. Stirling's story offers hope and encouragement to those struggling with similar issues.

10. Rejection as Redirection: Finding Purpose in Failure

I had to start over from scratch, which turned out to be one of the biggest blessings in my music career.

The sting of rejection. Stirling's experience on America's Got Talent was a public humiliation that left her feeling betrayed and discouraged. However, this rejection ultimately led her to a more authentic and fulfilling path.

Finding purpose in failure. Instead of giving up, Stirling used her rejection as an opportunity to redefine her goals and to pursue her music on her own terms. This resilience and determination are crucial for anyone pursuing a creative career.

The value of independence. By starting over from scratch, Stirling gained control over her music and her image. This independence allowed her to create a unique brand and to connect with her fans on a deeper level.

11. The Importance of Mentors: Learning from Those Who Inspire

I inherited the desire to have a life full of adventures that I could tell stories about. And I wanted to shake everyone’s hand along the way.

Learning from role models. Stirling's father, with his storytelling and adventurous spirit, served as an early role model. He instilled in her a love of life and a desire to connect with others.

Finding inspiration in the community. From her music teachers to fellow performers, Stirling found inspiration and guidance in her community. These mentors helped her develop her skills and navigate the challenges of the music industry.

The power of positive influence. Devin Graham, a cinematographer, played a significant role in Stirling's early success on YouTube. He provided her with opportunities to showcase her talent and taught her how to build a successful online presence.

12. The Enduring Value of Kindness and Connection

Thanks, Dawnee, for teaching me how to work hard and be kind; and for showing me how to properly pose for the camera—belly out, hand limp.

Kindness as a guiding principle. Dawnee Ray, a childhood friend, taught Stirling the importance of kindness and hard work. This lesson has remained with her throughout her career and has shaped her interactions with others.

The power of human connection. From her fans to her tour crew, Stirling values the relationships she has built with others. These connections provide her with support, inspiration, and a sense of belonging.

Finding joy in the journey. Despite the challenges and setbacks she has faced, Stirling's story is ultimately one of joy and resilience. It's about finding happiness in the journey and cherishing the connections you make along the way.

Last updated: April 3, 2025