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Words That Change Minds

Words That Change Minds

The 14 Patterns for Mastering the Language of Influence
by Shelle Rose Charvet 2019 406 pages
3.69
1k+ ratings
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Key Takeaways

1. The LAB Profile: Decoding Motivation and Behavior

"To get people to go somewhere with you, you need to meet them where they are... and not just pretend that they are already where you want them to be."

The Language and Behavior Profile (LAB Profile) is a powerful tool for understanding, predicting, and influencing human behavior. It consists of 14 categories that reveal how people get motivated, process information, and make decisions in specific contexts. By identifying these patterns, you can tailor your communication to match others' thinking styles, improving rapport and effectiveness in various situations.

Key components of the LAB Profile include:

  • Motivation Patterns: How people get triggered into action
  • Productivity Patterns: How people handle information and tasks
  • Context sensitivity: Recognizing that patterns may change in different situations

The LAB Profile offers practical applications in areas such as:

  • Recruitment and team building
  • Sales and marketing
  • Coaching and personal development
  • Negotiation and conflict resolution
  • Organizational change management

2. Proactive vs. Reactive: Understanding Action Orientation

"People who have a Proactive Pattern initiate. They tend to act with little or no consideration, to jump into situations without thinking or analyzing."

Action orientation determines how quickly someone moves from thought to action. Proactive individuals tend to initiate action quickly, often without extensive analysis. They excel in environments requiring swift decision-making and execution. Reactive individuals, on the other hand, prefer to think and analyze before acting, making them valuable in roles requiring careful consideration.

Distribution in work context:

  • Mainly Proactive: 15-20%
  • Equally Proactive & Reactive: 60-65%
  • Mainly Reactive: 15-20%

To effectively communicate with and motivate both types:

  • For Proactive: Use phrases like "go for it," "just do it," "take charge"
  • For Reactive: Use phrases like "let's think about it," "consider this," "analyze the options"

3. Toward vs. Away From: Identifying Motivational Direction

"People with a Toward pattern in a given Context are focused on their goal. They think in terms of what they want, goals to be achieved."

Motivational direction reveals whether someone is driven by pursuing goals (Toward) or avoiding problems (Away From). Toward-oriented individuals are energized by achieving objectives and may overlook potential obstacles. Away From individuals are motivated by solving problems and avoiding negative outcomes, making them excellent troubleshooters.

Key characteristics:

  • Toward: Focus on goals, achievements, and desired outcomes
  • Away From: Concentrate on problems, prevention, and potential issues

To influence effectively:

  • For Toward: Emphasize benefits, achievements, and positive outcomes
  • For Away From: Highlight problem-solving, risk mitigation, and avoiding negative consequences

Understanding this pattern helps in designing marketing campaigns, setting personal goals, and motivating team members.

4. Internal vs. External: Recognizing Decision-Making Processes

"People with an Internal Pattern in a Context provide their own motivation from within themselves. They decide about the quality of their work."

Decision-making processes vary between those who rely on internal standards (Internal) and those who seek external feedback (External). Internal individuals trust their own judgment and may resist outside direction. External individuals value others' opinions and need regular feedback to stay motivated.

Distribution in work context:

  • Mainly Internal: 40%
  • Equally Internal & External: 20%
  • Mainly External: 40%

Effective communication strategies:

  • For Internal: Use phrases like "you might consider," "it's up to you," "what do you think?"
  • For External: Provide frequent feedback, use phrases like "others will notice," "you'll get good feedback"

Understanding this pattern is crucial in management, sales, and personal relationships, as it influences how people respond to guidance and criticism.

5. Options vs. Procedures: Uncovering Problem-Solving Approaches

"People with an Options Pattern in a given Context are motivated by opportunities and possibilities to do something in a different way."

Problem-solving approaches differ between those who prefer exploring multiple possibilities (Options) and those who favor following established procedures (Procedures). Options individuals thrive on creating new systems and breaking rules, while Procedures individuals excel at following and completing step-by-step processes.

Key characteristics:

  • Options: Enjoy developing alternatives, may struggle with completing tasks
  • Procedures: Prefer clear guidelines, may resist deviation from established methods

To communicate effectively:

  • For Options: Emphasize possibilities, choices, and alternative approaches
  • For Procedures: Provide clear, step-by-step instructions and established methods

This pattern is particularly important in job design, team composition, and organizational change management.

6. Sameness vs. Difference: Grasping Attitudes Toward Change

"People with a Difference Pattern love change; they thrive on it and want it to be constant and major."

Attitudes toward change range from those who prefer stability (Sameness) to those who crave constant change (Difference). Understanding this pattern is crucial for managing organizational change, personal relationships, and marketing strategies.

Change preferences:

  • Sameness: Resist change, prefer stability
  • Sameness with Exception: Accept gradual, evolutionary change
  • Difference: Thrive on frequent, revolutionary change

Distribution in work context:

  • Sameness: 5%
  • Sameness with Exception: 65%
  • Difference: 20%
  • Sameness with Exception and Difference: 10%

To effectively communicate and implement change:

  • For Sameness: Emphasize continuity and similarity to previous experiences
  • For Sameness with Exception: Focus on gradual improvements and evolution
  • For Difference: Highlight novelty, uniqueness, and revolutionary aspects

7. Convincer Patterns: Revealing How People Get Convinced

"After a person has gathered the information in a specific sensory Channel, they will need to treat it in some way in order to become convinced about it."

Convincer patterns determine how individuals process information to become convinced. This includes both the Convincer Channel (how they gather information) and the Convincer Mode (how they process that information).

Convincer Channels:

  • See: Need visual evidence
  • Hear: Require verbal explanations
  • Read: Must read information
  • Do: Need hands-on experience

Convincer Modes:

  • Number of Examples: Need a specific number of instances
  • Automatic: Make quick decisions based on limited information
  • Consistent: Never fully convinced, need ongoing proof
  • Period of Time: Require a certain duration to be convinced

Understanding these patterns is crucial in sales, education, and persuasion. To convince effectively, match both the channel and mode of your audience.

8. Applying LAB Profile in Recruitment and Team Building

"To profile a position, you will need to understand what the specific tasks are and the responsibilities that the person will hold."

Effective recruitment and team building rely on matching candidates' LAB Profile patterns with job requirements and team dynamics. By profiling both the position and potential candidates, organizations can improve hiring decisions and team performance.

Steps for using LAB Profile in recruitment:

  1. Analyze the job requirements and create a LAB Profile for the position
  2. Design job advertisements using appropriate Influencing Language
  3. Screen candidates using LAB Profile questions during interviews
  4. Compare candidates' profiles with the job profile for best fit

Benefits of LAB Profile in team building:

  • Identify complementary strengths and potential conflicts
  • Assign tasks based on individual motivational patterns
  • Improve communication and collaboration within the team
  • Design targeted development plans for team members

9. Enhancing Communication and Negotiation with LAB Profile

"The key to using the LAB Profile® in negotiating situations is to take the necessary preparation time to figure out your counterparts' (and your clients', if you are representing them) main Patterns."

Effective communication and negotiation can be significantly improved by understanding and adapting to others' LAB Profile patterns. This approach allows you to present information and proposals in ways that resonate with your audience's thinking and decision-making styles.

Key strategies for using LAB Profile in communication and negotiation:

  1. Identify the main patterns of all parties involved
  2. Adapt your language and presentation style to match these patterns
  3. Frame proposals and arguments in terms that align with others' motivational directions
  4. Address potential objections based on Away From patterns
  5. Use appropriate Convincer strategies to build agreement

Benefits of this approach:

  • Improved rapport and understanding between parties
  • Reduced conflicts and misunderstandings
  • More effective persuasion and influence
  • Faster resolution of negotiations and disputes

10. LAB Profile in Sales, Marketing, and Customer Service

"To sell to people who have an Internal Pattern, you need to give them information and let them decide."

Sales, marketing, and customer service can be dramatically improved by applying LAB Profile insights. Understanding customers' motivational and decision-making patterns allows for more targeted and effective communication.

Applications in sales and marketing:

  • Tailoring marketing messages to match target audience patterns
  • Designing sales processes that align with customers' decision-making styles
  • Crafting product descriptions that resonate with specific motivational directions

Customer service improvements:

  • Adapting communication style to match individual customer patterns
  • Resolving conflicts by understanding and addressing underlying motivations
  • Enhancing customer satisfaction by meeting both stated and unstated needs

Key strategies:

  1. Conduct LAB Profile market research to understand target audience patterns
  2. Design marketing campaigns and sales scripts using appropriate Influencing Language
  3. Train sales and customer service teams in LAB Profile techniques
  4. Continuously refine approaches based on customer feedback and results

11. Leveraging LAB Profile for Personal and Professional Growth

"Knowing your own Pattern can help you understand and predict what is happening in your life."

Personal and professional development can be significantly enhanced by understanding your own LAB Profile patterns. This self-awareness allows you to leverage your strengths, address potential weaknesses, and adapt your approach in various situations.

Benefits of applying LAB Profile to personal growth:

  • Improved self-understanding and motivation
  • Enhanced communication skills in various contexts
  • Better decision-making aligned with personal values and goals
  • Increased adaptability in different professional and social situations

Strategies for leveraging LAB Profile:

  1. Identify your own patterns in different contexts (work, relationships, learning)
  2. Recognize how your patterns may differ from others and potential areas of conflict
  3. Develop flexibility in your approach to match different situations and people
  4. Set goals and design action plans that align with your motivational patterns
  5. Seek out complementary patterns in team members and partners to enhance overall effectiveness

By mastering the LAB Profile, individuals can unlock their potential for growth, improve their relationships, and achieve greater success in both personal and professional endeavors.

Last updated:

Review Summary

3.69 out of 5
Average of 1k+ ratings from Goodreads and Amazon.

Words That Change Minds receives mixed reviews, with an average rating of 3.69/5. Many readers find it insightful for understanding communication patterns and motivations, praising its practical applications in business and personal contexts. The book introduces the LAB (Language and Behavior) Profile, detailing 13 traits that influence behavior and communication. Some readers appreciate the structured approach and examples provided, while others find it dry and textbook-like. Critics note repetitive content and a lack of scientific validation for some concepts.

Your rating:

About the Author

Shelle Rose Charvet is an international expert on Influencing Language and bestselling author. Her book "Words That Change Minds" has been translated into 15 languages. With over 35 years of experience, Shelle Rose Charvet specializes in advanced techniques for enhancing rapport, trust, and influence. Her methods focus on subconscious communication processes and are used in over 30 countries to improve negotiations, sales, and conflict resolution. Charvet founded the Institute for Influence and has developed programs specifically for women managers and leaders. Her expertise lies in understanding the hidden drivers of human behavior and applying this knowledge to various professional contexts.

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