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BIRD BY BIRD

BIRD BY BIRD

Some Instructions on Writing and Life
by Anne Lamott 1994 256 pages
4.24
100k+ ratings
Writing
Memoir
Self Help
Listen

Key Takeaways

1. Writing is about telling the truth and observing life

The very first thing I tell my new students on the first day of a workshop is that good writing is about telling the truth.

Observe and record. Writing is fundamentally about keen observation and honest expression. It requires a willingness to look closely at the world around you and within you, and to communicate what you see and feel with authenticity. This process involves:

  • Paying attention to details in everyday life
  • Listening to conversations and capturing dialogue
  • Noticing sensory experiences and emotions
  • Reflecting on memories and personal experiences

Truth in fiction and non-fiction. Even when writing fiction, the goal is to reveal emotional truths about the human experience. In non-fiction, it's about presenting facts and experiences in a way that resonates with readers. Both require a commitment to honesty and a rejection of artifice or pretense.

2. Short assignments and shitty first drafts are keys to productivity

Almost all good writing begins with terrible first efforts. You need to start somewhere. Start by getting something—anything—down on paper.

Embrace imperfection. The concept of "shitty first drafts" liberates writers from the paralysis of perfectionism. By giving yourself permission to write poorly at first, you overcome the intimidating blank page and generate raw material to work with.

Break it down. Short assignments make the writing process less daunting:

  • Focus on one small scene or description at a time
  • Set achievable daily word count goals (e.g., 300 words)
  • Use a "one-inch picture frame" approach to limit scope

This approach builds momentum and confidence, gradually accumulating into larger works. Remember, you can always revise and improve later; the crucial first step is getting words on the page.

3. Perfectionism is the enemy of creativity

Perfectionism is the voice of the oppressor, the enemy of the people. It will keep you cramped and insane your whole life, and it is the main obstacle between you and a shitty first draft.

Let go of control. Perfectionism stems from fear - fear of failure, criticism, or not meeting impossibly high standards. Recognizing this fear is the first step to overcoming it. Instead of striving for perfection, aim for progress and authenticity.

Embrace the mess. Creativity thrives in an environment of freedom and experimentation:

  • Allow yourself to make mistakes
  • Explore unconventional ideas without self-censorship
  • Focus on quantity over quality in early drafts
  • View imperfections as opportunities for discovery and growth

Remember that even accomplished writers produce flawed first drafts. The magic often happens in the revision process, but you need raw material to revise.

4. Writer's block can be overcome through persistence and routine

I wish I had a secret I could let you in on, some formula my father passed on to me in a whisper just before he died, some code word that has enabled me to sit at my desk and land flights of creative inspiration like an air-traffic controller. But I don't.

Establish a routine. Consistent writing habits are more reliable than waiting for inspiration:

  • Set a regular writing time and stick to it
  • Create a dedicated writing space
  • Start with small, manageable goals (e.g., 15 minutes a day)

Push through resistance. Writer's block is often a symptom of fear or self-doubt. Instead of waiting for the block to lift, write through it:

  • Use prompts or exercises to jumpstart creativity
  • Write about the block itself or any random topic
  • Focus on quantity rather than quality to build momentum

Remember that writing is a skill that improves with practice. Even on difficult days, the act of sitting down to write maintains the habit and often leads to unexpected breakthroughs.

5. Develop your unique voice by writing authentically

You can't write out of someone else's big dark place; you can only write out of your own.

Find your truth. Your unique voice emerges when you write from your own experiences, perspectives, and emotions. This authenticity resonates with readers and sets your writing apart.

Avoid imitation. While it's natural to be influenced by writers you admire, consciously imitating their style can lead to inauthentic writing:

  • Use influences as inspiration, not templates
  • Experiment with different styles to find what feels natural
  • Trust your instincts and personal perspective

Embrace vulnerability. Authenticity often requires revealing parts of yourself that feel uncomfortable or exposed. This vulnerability is what creates a genuine connection with readers and gives your writing power.

6. Good characters are flawed, relatable, and have something at stake

We like certain characters because they are good or decent—they internalize some decency in the world that makes them able to take a risk or make a sacrifice for someone else.

Create multidimensional characters. Compelling characters have:

  • Strengths and weaknesses
  • Internal conflicts and external challenges
  • Desires and fears that drive their actions

Raise the stakes. Give your characters something important to lose or gain. This creates tension and investment for the reader.

Allow for growth. Characters should evolve throughout the story, learning from their experiences and mistakes. This development makes them feel more real and relatable to readers.

Remember that even villains or antagonists should have depth and understandable motivations. The most interesting characters are rarely all good or all bad, but complex mixtures of both.

7. Publication is not the end goal; the process of writing is the reward

Writing involves seeing people suffer and, as Robert Stone once put it, finding some meaning therein.

Focus on the journey. While publication can be a worthy goal, it shouldn't be the primary motivation for writing. The true value lies in:

  • Personal growth and self-discovery
  • Developing your craft and skills
  • Exploring ideas and emotions through writing
  • Connecting with readers and fellow writers

Find intrinsic motivation. Write because you have something to say, not just to be published:

  • Explore themes that matter to you
  • Use writing as a tool for understanding the world
  • Find joy in the act of creation itself

Remember that even successful published authors face rejection and disappointment. Building a fulfilling writing practice that exists independently of external validation is crucial for long-term satisfaction and resilience.

8. Writing groups and feedback are essential for growth

If you find that you start a number of stories or pieces that you don't ever bother finishing, that you lose interest or faith in them along the way, it may be that there is nothing at their center about which you care passionately.

Seek constructive feedback. Sharing your work with others can:

  • Provide fresh perspectives on your writing
  • Help identify strengths and areas for improvement
  • Offer encouragement and motivation

Choose feedback partners wisely. Look for readers who:

  • Understand and appreciate your genre or style
  • Can provide honest but supportive criticism
  • Have writing experience or knowledge themselves

Learn to give feedback. Critiquing others' work can improve your own writing by:

  • Sharpening your analytical skills
  • Exposing you to different writing styles and techniques
  • Helping you recognize common pitfalls

Remember that feedback is subjective. Use it as a tool for improvement, but ultimately trust your own instincts and vision for your work.

9. Use personal experiences and emotions as material for writing

Write about your childhood, I tell them. Plug your nose and jump in, and write down all your memories as truthfully as you can.

Mine your life. Your personal experiences are a rich source of material:

  • Childhood memories and family dynamics
  • Moments of triumph, failure, or transformation
  • Intense emotional experiences (love, loss, fear, joy)

Transform experiences into art. Use your personal stories as starting points, but shape them into compelling narratives:

  • Find universal themes in specific experiences
  • Use sensory details to bring scenes to life
  • Explore different perspectives on past events

Practice emotional honesty. Don't shy away from difficult or uncomfortable emotions in your writing. This vulnerability often creates the most powerful and relatable work.

Remember that while drawing from personal experiences, you can still fictionalize or alter details to protect privacy or serve the needs of your story.

10. Give generously through your writing to connect with readers

You are going to have to give and give and give, or there's no reason for you to be writing. You have to give from the deepest part of yourself, and you are going to have to go on giving, and the giving is going to have to be its own reward.

Write with purpose. Approach writing as an act of generosity:

  • Share insights and experiences that might help others
  • Offer comfort, understanding, or new perspectives
  • Create characters and stories that resonate emotionally

Connect authentically. Genuine connection comes from:

  • Writing with honesty and vulnerability
  • Addressing universal human experiences and emotions
  • Respecting your readers' intelligence and experiences

Find fulfillment in the process. The act of giving through writing can be deeply rewarding:

  • It can help you process your own experiences
  • It creates a sense of purpose and meaning
  • It fosters empathy and understanding

Remember that your unique voice and perspective are valuable gifts to offer the world. By writing generously and authentically, you create the potential for meaningful connections with readers, regardless of publication or commercial success.

Last updated:

Review Summary

4.24 out of 5
Average of 100k+ ratings from Goodreads and Amazon.

Bird by Bird is widely praised as an insightful, humorous guide to writing and life. Many readers appreciate Lamott's candid advice, personal anecdotes, and encouragement to aspiring writers. The book offers practical tips on overcoming writer's block, dealing with criticism, and developing characters. While some find it dated or self-indulgent, most reviewers consider it an inspiring, comforting resource for writers at all levels. Lamott's conversational style and relatable experiences resonate with many, making it a beloved classic in the writing community.

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About the Author

Anne Lamott is an American author known for her novels and non-fiction works. Based in the San Francisco Bay Area, she writes largely autobiographical pieces infused with self-deprecating humor. Her works cover topics like alcoholism, single motherhood, and Christianity. Lamott's appeal stems from her humor, insightful observations, and outspoken views on politics and faith. A graduate of Drew College Preparatory School, she is the daughter of writer Kenneth Lamott, who inspired her first novel. Lamott's life and work were the subject of a 1999 documentary by Freida Lee Mock.

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