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How to Make Friends with the Dark

How to Make Friends with the Dark

by Kathleen Glasgow 2019 421 pages
4.07
35k+ ratings
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Plot Summary

Secrets Hidden in Plain Sight

Bills reveal hidden financial struggles

Tiger Tolliver, a sixteen-year-old girl, discovers a stack of unpaid bills in her shared dresser with her mother, June. This discovery hints at the financial struggles they face, despite June's efforts to maintain normalcy. June, a Bookmobile librarian, is Tiger's entire world, and the thought of losing her is terrifying. As Tiger tries to wake her mother from a headache-induced slumber, she is reminded of their close-knit relationship and the precariousness of their situation. The absence of coffee disrupts their morning routine, heightening Tiger's anxiety about their financial state. Despite the tension, June's warmth and humor momentarily ease Tiger's worries, reinforcing their bond. However, the looming threat of unpaid bills and the fragility of their lives linger, setting the stage for the upheaval to come.

The Unraveling of Normalcy

A dance invitation sparks conflict

Tiger's life takes a turn when she receives an invitation to the Memorial Days Dance from Kai Henderson, a boy she's secretly admired. The prospect of attending excites her but also brings tension with her overprotective mother. June's reluctance to let Tiger attend without her input leads to a heated argument, leaving Tiger feeling suffocated by her mother's control. Despite the conflict, Tiger is determined to assert her independence and experience a normal teenage milestone. The dance becomes a symbol of freedom and a chance to step out of her mother's shadow. However, the argument leaves a lingering sense of guilt and unease, as Tiger grapples with the fear of losing her mother and the desire to carve out her own identity.

A World Shattered by Loss

Tragedy strikes, leaving Tiger alone

The unthinkable happens when June suddenly dies from a brain aneurysm, leaving Tiger devastated and alone. The loss is a seismic shift in Tiger's world, plunging her into a darkness she never imagined. The hospital scene is surreal, with Tiger struggling to comprehend the finality of her mother's death. Surrounded by well-meaning adults, including her friend Cake's mother, Rhonda, Tiger feels isolated in her grief. The reality of her mother's absence is overwhelming, and the weight of unspoken words and unresolved conflicts haunts her. As Tiger navigates the immediate aftermath, she is thrust into the foster care system, a world of uncertainty and fear. The loss of her mother is compounded by the loss of her home and the life she once knew, leaving Tiger to grapple with the enormity of her grief and the daunting task of finding a new path forward.

The Weight of Unspoken Words

Guilt and regret consume Tiger

In the wake of her mother's death, Tiger is consumed by guilt over their last argument. The harsh words exchanged haunt her, as she grapples with the fear that her mother died thinking she was unloved. The weight of unspoken words and unresolved conflicts becomes a heavy burden, amplifying her grief. Tiger's mind is a whirlwind of memories and regrets, as she struggles to reconcile the love she felt for her mother with the anger and frustration that marked their last interactions. The realization that she can never make amends or hear her mother's voice again is a crushing blow, leaving Tiger feeling lost and untethered. As she navigates the foster care system, the absence of her mother's guidance and support is keenly felt, deepening her sense of isolation and despair.

A Glimpse of Hope Amidst Chaos

A sister offers a new beginning

Amidst the chaos of her new reality, Tiger learns of a half-sister, Shayna, who is willing to become her guardian. This revelation offers a glimmer of hope, a chance for a new beginning and a connection to family she never knew existed. The prospect of meeting Shayna is both exciting and terrifying, as Tiger grapples with the uncertainty of their relationship and the potential for disappointment. The idea of family is complicated by the knowledge of her father's incarceration, adding another layer of complexity to her situation. Despite the challenges, the possibility of a sisterly bond offers Tiger a lifeline, a chance to rebuild her life and find a sense of belonging. As she prepares to meet Shayna, Tiger is filled with a mix of hope and apprehension, unsure of what the future holds but determined to embrace the opportunity for connection and healing.

The Search for Belonging

Navigating the foster system's challenges

As Tiger navigates the foster care system, she encounters a series of challenges and uncertainties. Each new placement brings its own set of rules and dynamics, leaving Tiger feeling like a perpetual outsider. The search for belonging becomes a central theme, as Tiger grapples with the loss of her mother and the need to find a new home. The foster system is a world of transience and instability, where connections are fleeting and trust is hard-won. Despite the difficulties, Tiger's resilience and determination shine through, as she seeks to carve out a space for herself in a world that feels foreign and unwelcoming. The journey is fraught with setbacks and heartache, but it is also marked by moments of kindness and connection, offering glimpses of hope and the possibility of finding a place to call home.

A Desperate Cry for Help

Tiger's world spirals into chaos

After a tumultuous encounter with her sister Shayna's abusive boyfriend, Ray, Tiger finds herself fleeing her home in fear. The confrontation leaves her feeling abandoned and desperate, leading her to wander aimlessly into the desert. Overwhelmed by the weight of her grief and the chaos of her life, Tiger contemplates giving up entirely. However, a chance encounter with Lupe Hidalgo, a fellow grief group member, offers a moment of connection and understanding. Despite the darkness surrounding her, Tiger finds a sliver of hope in Lupe's presence, reminding her that she is not entirely alone in her struggles.

The Weight of Consequences

Tiger faces the aftermath of reckless actions

In a moment of desperation, Tiger and Lupe steal the Jellymobile and embark on a reckless joyride, resulting in a crash that lands them in juvenile detention. The consequences of her actions weigh heavily on Tiger as she navigates the unfamiliar and intimidating environment of the detention center. Stripped of her freedom and surrounded by other troubled youths, Tiger grapples with feelings of guilt and shame. The experience forces her to confront the reality of her situation and the impact of her choices, setting the stage for a journey of self-discovery and redemption.

A Glimmer of Hope Emerges

A chance for redemption and healing

After her release from juvenile detention, Tiger is placed in a group home where she begins to find stability and support. Under the guidance of Teddy, the compassionate house leader, Tiger learns valuable life skills and begins to rebuild her sense of self-worth. The structured environment and the camaraderie of the other girls provide a sense of belonging that Tiger has been missing. As she starts to heal from her past traumas, Tiger discovers the strength within herself to face the challenges ahead, offering a glimpse of hope for a brighter future.

Facing the Shadows of Past

Confronting family secrets and seeking closure

Tiger's journey takes a pivotal turn when she reconnects with her estranged father, Dusty, who is incarcerated. Through their conversations, Tiger learns more about her family's history and the circumstances that shaped her mother's life. This newfound understanding helps Tiger come to terms with her mother's death and the secrets that were kept from her. As she pieces together the fragments of her past, Tiger gains a deeper appreciation for her mother's struggles and the sacrifices she made, allowing her to find closure and peace.

A New Path Forward

Building a future with newfound family

With the support of her sister Shayna, who is committed to sobriety and building a stable life, Tiger begins to envision a future filled with possibilities. Together, they plan a move to Tucson, where they can start fresh and create a new home. The prospect of a new beginning brings a sense of excitement and anticipation, as Tiger embraces the opportunity to redefine her life on her own terms. The bond between the sisters strengthens as they navigate the challenges of their new reality, united by their shared experiences and determination to succeed.

Embracing the Unknown Future

Finding strength in vulnerability and hope

As Tiger prepares to embark on this new chapter, she reflects on the journey that brought her here. The lessons learned from her grief, the friendships forged in adversity, and the love of her sister have all contributed to her growth and resilience. While the future remains uncertain, Tiger is ready to face it with courage and hope. She understands that life will continue to present challenges, but she is no longer afraid to confront them. With a renewed sense of purpose and a heart open to the possibilities, Tiger steps forward into the unknown, ready to make friends with the dark.

Characters

Tiger Tolliver

Resilient, introspective, and evolving

Tiger is a young girl grappling with the sudden loss of her mother and the upheaval it brings to her life. Her journey through grief and self-discovery is marked by moments of despair and resilience. As she navigates the complexities of her new reality, Tiger learns to confront her fears and embrace the unknown. Her relationships with her sister Shayna and newfound friends provide the support and guidance she needs to heal and grow, ultimately leading her to a place of hope and possibility.

June Tolliver

Loving, protective, and secretive

June is Tiger's mother, whose sudden death leaves a profound impact on her daughter. As a single mother, June was fiercely protective of Tiger, often to the point of being overbearing. Her love for Tiger was evident, but her reluctance to share details about their financial struggles and Tiger's father created tension in their relationship. June's secrets, including the existence of a half-sister, add complexity to Tiger's grief, as she grapples with the realization that she didn't fully know her mother. Despite the challenges, June's love and guidance remain a guiding force for Tiger, even in her absence.

Shayna Lee Franklin

Determined, flawed, and loving

Shayna is Tiger's half-sister, who steps in as her guardian after their mother's death. Despite her own struggles with addiction and an abusive relationship, Shayna is committed to providing a stable and loving home for Tiger. Her journey toward sobriety and self-improvement is driven by her desire to be a better sister and role model. Shayna's resilience and determination to overcome her past mistakes serve as an inspiration to Tiger, strengthening their bond and paving the way for a brighter future together.

Cake

Loyal, supportive, and musical

Cake is Tiger's best friend, offering unwavering support and companionship in the wake of June's death. As a talented musician, Cake provides a sense of normalcy and comfort for Tiger, reminding her of the life she once had. Cake's presence is a lifeline for Tiger, as she navigates the complexities of grief and the foster care system. Her loyalty and understanding offer Tiger a sense of stability and connection, even as everything else in her life feels uncertain.

Lupe Hidalgo

Bold, rebellious, and compassionate

Lupe is a fellow member of Tiger's grief group, known for her tough exterior and sharp wit. Beneath her bravado lies a deep well of pain and vulnerability, stemming from the loss of her brother to suicide. Lupe's friendship with Tiger is marked by moments of honesty and mutual understanding, as they both navigate the challenges of grief and adolescence. Her presence in Tiger's life offers a sense of camaraderie and support, reminding Tiger that she is not alone in her struggles.

Thaddeus

Supportive, insightful, and determined

Thaddeus is a friend and confidant to Tiger, offering guidance and understanding as she navigates the complexities of her new reality. His own experiences with the foster care system and family challenges provide valuable insights for Tiger, helping her to see the possibilities for her future. Thaddeus's determination to create a better life for himself and his siblings serves as a source of inspiration for Tiger, encouraging her to embrace her own potential and pursue her dreams.

Karen

Pragmatic, experienced, and supportive

Karen is the social worker assigned to Tiger's case, guiding her through the complexities of the foster care system. Her pragmatic approach and experience offer a sense of stability for Tiger, as she navigates the challenges of finding a new home and family. Karen's support is instrumental in helping Tiger understand her options and make informed decisions about her future.

Plot Devices

Grief and Loss

Exploration of profound emotional impact

The themes of grief and loss are central to the narrative, driving Tiger's journey and shaping her experiences. The sudden death of her mother leaves Tiger grappling with a profound sense of loss and the weight of unresolved conflicts. The exploration of grief is nuanced and multifaceted, capturing the complexity of emotions that accompany such a significant loss. The narrative delves into the impact of grief on Tiger's identity and relationships, as she seeks to find a new path forward in a world that feels foreign and unwelcoming.

Family and Belonging

Search for connection and identity

The search for family and belonging is a key plot device, as Tiger navigates the foster care system and discovers the existence of a half-sister. The concept of family is explored in various forms, from the bond between Tiger and her mother to the potential for connection with Shayna. The narrative examines the complexities of family dynamics and the longing for a sense of belonging, as Tiger seeks to rebuild her life and find a place to call home.

Secrets and Revelations

Unveiling hidden truths and complexities

The revelation of secrets, including the existence of a half-sister and the truth about Tiger's father, adds layers of complexity to the narrative. These revelations challenge Tiger's understanding of her family and her identity, forcing her to confront the unknown and navigate the uncertainties of her new reality. The uncovering of hidden truths serves as a catalyst for Tiger's journey, driving her search for answers and a sense of belonging in a world that feels unfamiliar and unpredictable.

Redemption and Growth

Journey toward self-discovery and renewal

Tiger's journey is marked by moments of redemption and growth, as she confronts her past mistakes and learns to embrace her potential. The narrative explores the themes of forgiveness and self-discovery, highlighting the importance of resilience and hope in the face of adversity. Through her experiences, Tiger learns to find strength in vulnerability and embrace the unknown future with courage and determination.

Analysis

Exploration of grief and resilience

"How to Make Friends with the Dark" by Kathleen Glasgow is a poignant exploration of grief, resilience, and the search for belonging. Through Tiger's journey, the narrative delves into the complexities of loss and the emotional turmoil that accompanies it. The book highlights the importance of family, both biological and chosen, in navigating life's challenges and finding a sense of identity. The themes of redemption and growth underscore the resilience of the human spirit, as Tiger learns to confront her fears and embrace the unknown. Glasgow's storytelling captures the raw emotions of grief and the transformative power of hope, offering readers a compelling and heartfelt narrative that resonates with the universal experience of loss and healing.

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FAQ

Synopsis & Basic Details

What is How to Make Friends with the Dark about?

  • Teen grapples with loss: The story follows sixteen-year-old Tiger Tolliver as she navigates the sudden death of her mother, June, and the subsequent upheaval in her life.
  • Navigating grief and change: Tiger is forced to confront her grief, her identity, and the complexities of the foster care system, all while trying to find a new sense of belonging.
  • Seeking connection and hope: The narrative explores Tiger's journey as she grapples with loss, seeks connection with others, and ultimately finds a path toward healing and hope.

Why should I read How to Make Friends with the Dark?

  • Raw emotional depth: The novel offers a raw and honest portrayal of grief, capturing the complex emotions and challenges of loss with unflinching honesty.
  • Compelling character journey: Readers will be drawn to Tiger's journey of self-discovery, as she navigates the foster care system and seeks to rebuild her life.
  • Exploration of resilience: The story highlights the power of resilience and the human capacity to find hope and connection even in the darkest of times, making it a moving and inspiring read.

What is the background of How to Make Friends with the Dark?

  • Contemporary setting: The story is set in a contemporary time, focusing on the emotional and psychological impact of loss on a teenager in a modern context.
  • Focus on social issues: The novel touches on the foster care system, highlighting the challenges faced by children who have lost their parents and are navigating the complexities of the system.
  • Exploration of grief: The background is primarily focused on the emotional and psychological landscape of grief, rather than a specific historical or political context.

What are the most memorable quotes in How to Make Friends with the Dark?

  • "We are we and us is us": This quote encapsulates the close bond between Tiger and her mother, highlighting their self-sufficient and insular relationship.
  • "You have to make friends with the dark": This quote, which serves as the title, reflects the central theme of the novel, emphasizing the need to confront and accept grief in order to move forward.
  • "I'm drowning": This quote, repeated throughout the story, captures Tiger's overwhelming sense of loss and her struggle to stay afloat amidst the chaos of her life.

What writing style, narrative choices, and literary techniques does Kathleen Glasgow use?

  • First-person perspective: The story is told from Tiger's first-person point of view, allowing readers to intimately experience her thoughts, emotions, and struggles.
  • Lyrical and evocative prose: Glasgow employs a lyrical and evocative writing style, using vivid imagery and sensory details to create a powerful and emotional reading experience.
  • Non-linear timeline: The narrative shifts between the present and the past, using flashbacks and memories to reveal the complexities of Tiger's relationships and her journey through grief.

Hidden Details & Subtle Connections

What are some minor details that add significant meaning?

  • The red kitchen: The description of the red kitchen, with its red appliances and utensils, symbolizes the intensity and passion of Tiger's relationship with her mother, as well as the chaos and disruption that follows her death.
  • The dress: The ivory lace dress, initially a source of conflict between Tiger and her mother, becomes a symbol of grief and remembrance, as Tiger refuses to take it off after her mother's death.
  • The Jellymobile: The old ice cream truck, a symbol of Tiger and her mother's unique bond and their shared summer business, represents the life Tiger has lost and the memories she cherishes.

What are some subtle foreshadowing and callbacks?

  • The "well-oiled machine": The phrase "a well-oiled, good-looking, and good-smelling machine," used to describe Tiger and her mother's routine, foreshadows the disruption and chaos that will follow June's death.
  • The Amsterdam movie: The reference to the movie about a girl and boy with cancer who go to Amsterdam to have sex foreshadows Tiger's own desire for a first kiss and the complexities of her relationship with Kai.
  • The "plush" feeling: Cake's description of kissing as "plush" foreshadows Tiger's first kiss with Kai, which is described as having that same quality, highlighting the importance of physical connection in her life.

What are some unexpected character connections?

  • Mae-Lynn and Tiger: The connection between Tiger and Mae-Lynn, two seemingly different girls who are both on the fringes of the social hierarchy, reveals a shared understanding of grief and isolation.
  • Thaddeus and Tiger: The bond between Tiger and Thaddeus, both navigating the foster care system and the complexities of their pasts, highlights the importance of finding connection and support in unexpected places.
  • Randy Gonzalez and June: The revelation that June frequently visited Randy Gonzalez's ranch, and that he knew her well, adds a layer of depth to her character and reveals a hidden aspect of her life.

Who are the most significant supporting characters?

  • Cake: As Tiger's best friend, Cake provides unwavering support and a sense of normalcy, serving as a lifeline for Tiger as she navigates her grief and the foster care system.
  • Thaddeus: As a fellow foster kid, Thaddeus offers Tiger a unique perspective and understanding, guiding her through the complexities of her new reality and offering a sense of camaraderie.
  • Lupe Hidalgo: As a fellow member of the grief group, Lupe provides Tiger with a sense of connection and understanding, sharing her own experiences with loss and offering a different perspective on grief.

Psychological, Emotional, & Relational Analysis

What are some unspoken motivations of the characters?

  • June's overprotectiveness: June's overprotectiveness of Tiger stems from her own past traumas and her desire to shield her daughter from the pain and uncertainty she experienced.
  • Tiger's desire for independence: Tiger's desire for independence is driven by her need to assert her own identity and break free from her mother's control, even as she grapples with the fear of losing her.
  • Shayna's need for redemption: Shayna's willingness to become Tiger's guardian is motivated by her desire to atone for her past mistakes and find a sense of purpose in helping her sister.

What psychological complexities do the characters exhibit?

  • Tiger's grief and guilt: Tiger exhibits a complex mix of grief, guilt, and anger, as she struggles to come to terms with her mother's death and her own role in their last argument.
  • Shayna's addiction and trauma: Shayna's struggles with addiction and her past abusive relationship reveal the psychological toll of trauma and the challenges of recovery.
  • Lupe's anger and vulnerability: Lupe's tough exterior masks a deep well of pain and vulnerability, stemming from the loss of her brother and her own struggles with grief.

What are the major emotional turning points?

  • June's death: The sudden death of June is the major emotional turning point, plunging Tiger into a world of grief and uncertainty and setting the stage for her journey of self-discovery.
  • The first kiss: Tiger's first kiss with Kai is a moment of intense emotion and vulnerability, highlighting her desire for connection and her longing for a normal teenage experience.
  • The discovery of her father: The revelation of her father's identity and his incarceration is a turning point, forcing Tiger to confront the complexities of her family history and her own identity.

How do relationship dynamics evolve?

  • Tiger and June: The relationship between Tiger and June evolves from a close-knit bond to a complex mix of love, frustration, and unspoken words, highlighting the challenges of mother-daughter relationships.
  • Tiger and Shayna: The relationship between Tiger and Shayna evolves from a tentative connection to a strong sisterly bond, as they navigate the challenges of their new reality and learn to rely on each other.
  • Tiger and Cake: The friendship between Tiger and Cake is tested by the challenges of grief and change, but ultimately endures, highlighting the importance of loyalty and support in times of adversity.

Interpretation & Debate

Which parts of the story remain ambiguous or open-ended?

  • The identity of Tiger's father: While Tiger learns his name and that he is incarcerated, the full details of his relationship with June and his motivations remain somewhat ambiguous.
  • The nature of the afterlife: The novel leaves the question of what happens after death open-ended, with Tiger grappling with her own beliefs and the possibility of her mother's presence.
  • The long-term impact of trauma: The novel does not offer a neat resolution to the characters' traumas, leaving the long-term impact of grief and abuse open to interpretation.

What are some debatable, controversial scenes or moments in How to Make Friends with the Dark?

  • Tiger's actions towards Ellen: Tiger's violent reaction to Ellen's taunts is a controversial moment, raising questions about the appropriateness of violence as a response to grief and bullying.
  • Tiger's relationship with Kai: Tiger's relationship with Kai, which is marked by both intense emotion and disappointment, raises questions about the complexities of teenage love and the challenges of navigating first relationships.
  • Shayna's parenting: Shayna's parenting style, which is marked by both love and her own struggles with addiction and trauma, raises questions about the complexities of family and the challenges of raising a child while dealing with personal issues.

How to Make Friends with the Dark Ending Explained: How It Ends & What It Means

  • Tiger's journey of self-discovery: The ending of the novel emphasizes Tiger's journey of self-discovery, as she learns to navigate her grief and embrace her potential.
  • The importance of connection: The ending highlights the importance of connection and support, as Tiger finds solace in her relationships with her sister, her friends, and her community.
  • Embracing the unknown: The ending leaves the future open-ended, but it also emphasizes Tiger's newfound strength and resilience, as she steps forward into the unknown with courage and hope.

Review Summary

4.07 out of 5
Average of 35k+ ratings from Goodreads and Amazon.

How to Make Friends with the Dark received mostly positive reviews, with readers praising its raw and emotional portrayal of grief. Many found the main character, Tiger, relatable and appreciated the realistic depiction of teenagers. The book's exploration of foster care and complex family relationships resonated with readers. Some criticized the pacing and length, feeling it dragged in parts. Overall, reviewers found it a powerful and moving story about loss, resilience, and learning to cope with darkness.

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About the Author

Kathleen Glasgow is a bestselling author known for her young adult novels that tackle difficult topics like mental health, addiction, and grief. Her debut novel, Girl in Pieces, gained international recognition and established her as a prominent voice in contemporary YA literature. Glasgow's writing style is praised for its emotional depth and raw honesty. She has a strong social media presence, engaging with readers on platforms like TikTok and Instagram. Her works include The Glass Girl, You'd Be Home Now, and The Agathas series, co-authored with Liz Lawson. Glasgow's books consistently explore the complexities of teenage life and offer hope amidst challenging circumstances.

Other books by Kathleen Glasgow

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