Jerks at Work

1. Identify and neutralize the seven types of workplace jerks

Most of us have worked with someone who had an outsized effect on our emotional well-being.

Understanding jerks is key. Workplace jerks come in various forms, each with distinct behaviors and motivations. The seven main types are:

1. Kiss Up/Kick Downers
2. Credit Stealers
3. Bulldozers
4. Free Riders
5. Micromanagers
6. Neglectful Bosses
7. Gaslighters

Recognizing patterns is crucial. By identifying these types, you can develop targeted strategies to deal with them effectively. Each jerk type requires a different approach, from confrontation to building alliances or setting clear boundaries.

Prevention is better than cure. Learning to spot early warning signs can help you avoid becoming a victim or unwitting enabler of workplace jerks. This knowledge empowers you to create a more positive and productive work environment for yourself and your colleagues.

2. Kiss Up/Kick Downers: Beware of those who climb by stepping on others

Kiss up/kick downers have a singular goal in mind: to climb to the top by any means necessary.

Spot the pattern. Kiss Up/Kick Downers treat superiors with charm and respect while undermining peers and subordinates. They excel at:

• Reading social situations
• Finding commonalities with powerful people
• Asserting power early in new groups

Protect yourself and others. To counter Kiss Up/Kick Downers:

• Find well-connected allies who can provide perspective
• Document instances of mistreatment
• Create physical and psychological distance
• Approach supervisors strategically, focusing on patterns of behavior

Build a strong network. Developing broad connections across the organization can help insulate you from the negative effects of Kiss Up/Kick Downers and provide support when needed.

3. Credit Stealers: Protect your ideas from wolves in sheep's clothing

Credit stealers are wolves in sheep's clothing—they are our teammates and mentors who look out only for themselves.

Guard your innovations. Credit Stealers often start small, testing the waters before moving on to bigger thefts. They may:

• Overclaim credit in group settings
• Underclaim credit to appear humble
• Take advantage of ambiguity in team contributions

Establish your voice. To protect yourself:

• Speak up early and often in meetings
• Cultivate "advice ties" – people others go to for guidance
• Focus on solutions, not just problems
• Recognize and echo others' contributions

Create clear processes. Implement systems to track individual contributions, especially in team settings. This can include:

• Regular "fairness checks"
• Documenting who contributed what
• Rewarding the process, not just outcomes

4. Bulldozers: Stand firm against those who dominate decisions

Bulldozers are seasoned, well-connected employees who aren't afraid to flex their muscles to get what they want.

Recognize bulldozing tactics. Bulldozers often:

• Assert power early and often
• Make teams reliant on their expertise
• Exploit conflicts between managers
• Target weak or conflict-averse bosses

Stand your ground. To counter bulldozers:

• Speak up early in meetings and hold your ground
• Document talking time to show imbalances
• Use the bulldozer to solve the problem by involving them in policy changes
• Form alliances with coworkers to present a united front

Implement protective measures. To prevent bulldozing:

• Rotate important roles to prevent monopolization
• Set clear decision-making procedures before discussions begin
• Designate a timekeeper for meetings
• Control the bulldozer's spotlight by giving them specific, time-limited roles

5. Free Riders: Recognize and address workplace slackers

Free riders are experts at doing nothing and getting rewarded for it.

Spot the freeloaders. Free Riders often:

• Take on work that appears important but requires little effort
• Thrive in teams with conscientious members who pick up slack
• Become early "superstars" and then coast on past success
• Perform well only when the boss is watching

Create accountability. To address free riding:

• Conduct regular "fairness checks" to track individual contributions
• Encourage healthy social comparisons within teams
• Reward the process of work, not just outcomes
• Confront free riders privately, focusing on their strengths and team goals

Prevent systemic issues. Some workplace cultures inadvertently encourage free riding. Counter this by:

• Avoiding over-rewarding individuals without ongoing performance checks
• Ensuring bosses stay connected to their teams
• Creating clear expectations for ongoing contributions, especially for high-status team members

6. Micromanagers: Reclaim control from overbearing bosses

Micromanagers are impatient taskmasters who disrespect your personal space and time.

Understand the root causes. Micromanagers often:

• Believe more monitoring equals better performance
• Lack proper management training
• Are driven by fear of failure or losing control
• Have too many reporting layers in the organization

Communicate effectively. To address micromanagement:

• Have a conversation about big-picture goals and how your work fits in
• Set mutually agreed-upon expectations
• Avoid broad generalizations when discussing their behavior
• Schedule regular check-ins to maintain alignment

Set clear boundaries. Establish:

• Clear work hours, especially for remote or flexible work
• Priorities for tasks and feedback
• A system for delegating appropriate tasks to alleviate their workload

7. Neglectful Bosses: Navigate the challenges of absent leadership

Neglectful bosses hate being out of the loop. But for lots of reasons (micromanaging is one), they often are.

Recognize the cycle. Neglectful bosses often follow a pattern:

1. Long periods of neglect
2. Anxiety buildup from being out of the loop
3. Sudden surge of control to alleviate anxiety

Take initiative. To manage a neglectful boss:

• Use "need-nudging" to clearly communicate your needs within a reasonable timeframe
• Create a shared calendar for your boss to easily schedule meetings
• Offer to take on some of their work to free up their time
• Find other experts to supplement your boss's guidance

Build independence. While addressing neglect:

• Develop a strong network of "advice ties" within the organization
• Prioritize your tasks and clearly communicate these priorities to your boss
• Take initiative on projects while keeping your boss informed of progress

8. Gaslighters: Defend yourself against psychological manipulation

Gaslighters lie with the intent of deceiving on a grand scale.

Recognize gaslighting tactics. Gaslighters often:

• Isolate victims by making them feel special or destroying their self-worth
• Start with small lies and escalate over time
• Make victims question their reality and memories
• Cover their tracks and build alliances with powerful people

Protect yourself. To counter gaslighting:

• Document events and conversations in real-time
• Slowly rebuild your social network, starting with close colleagues
• Find a "social referent" – a well-connected person who can validate your experiences
• Approach others asking for feedback, not directly accusing the gaslighter

Escape safely. When leaving a gaslighting situation:

• Build evidence quietly over time
• Avoid direct confrontation until you have a solid exit strategy
• Seek support from HR or higher management with documented evidence
• Be prepared for the gaslighter to retaliate or spread misinformation

9. Become an effective ally against workplace jerks

The antidote to jerks at work is friends at work.

Recognize ally types. There are four main types of workplace allies:

1. Virtue Signalers (all talk, no action)
2. Dramatic Saviors (well-intentioned but counterproductive)
3. Actionless Observers (avoid involvement)
4. Effective Allies (provide meaningful support)

Be an effective ally. To support colleagues dealing with workplace jerks:

• Offer private support and advice
• Help document incidents and patterns of behavior
• Connect victims with appropriate resources or higher-ups
• Advocate for systemic changes to prevent future issues

Create a supportive culture. Encourage a workplace where:

• People feel comfortable speaking up about issues
• There are clear processes for addressing workplace conflicts
• Allies are recognized and valued for their support
• Jerk behavior is consistently addressed and not tolerated

10. Implement strategies to create a healthier work environment

Expect to feel more empowered and less anxious. Gone will be the days where you tiptoe around your jerk, coming to the office only when they're gone, or climbing the stairs to avoid seeing them in the elevator.

Foster open communication. Encourage:

• Regular team meetings to discuss workflow and interpersonal dynamics
• Anonymous feedback systems to surface issues early
• Clear processes for conflict resolution

Implement structural changes. Consider:

• Rotating leadership roles to prevent power concentration
• Creating clear accountability measures for all team members
• Establishing mentorship programs to support new employees

Lead by example. As a leader or colleague:

• Address jerk behavior promptly and consistently
• Recognize and reward collaborative, supportive behavior
• Seek feedback on your own behavior and be open to change

By implementing these strategies, you can create a more positive, productive, and jerk-resistant workplace. Remember, change often starts with individual actions, so be the catalyst for a better work environment.

Last updated: November 20, 2024