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Refuse to Choose!

Refuse to Choose!

Use All of Your Interests, Passions, and Hobbies to Create the Life and Career of Your Dreams
by Barbara Sher 2006 288 pages
3.97
4k+ ratings
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Key Takeaways

1. Embrace your Scanner identity: You're not flawed, you're multitalented

You are the owner of a remarkable, multitalented brain trying to do its work in a world that doesn't understand who you are and doesn't know why you behave as you do.

Scanners are unique. They possess an exceptional gift: the ability to be interested in and pursue multiple fields simultaneously. This trait, often misunderstood as a lack of focus or commitment, is actually a powerful asset in today's rapidly changing world. Scanners have:

  • Broad knowledge across various disciplines
  • Quick learning abilities and adaptability
  • Creative problem-solving skills due to diverse perspectives

Society's misconception. The pressure to specialize and choose a single career path has led many Scanners to feel inadequate or flawed. However, this is a recent cultural shift, and throughout history, polymaths and Renaissance individuals were highly valued. Embracing your Scanner identity means:

  • Recognizing your diverse interests as strengths, not weaknesses
  • Rejecting the notion that you must limit yourself to one field
  • Cultivating your multiple talents and using them to your advantage

2. Understand your Rewards and Durations to navigate Scanner tendencies

When you lose interest in something, you must always consider the possibility that you've gotten what you came for; you have completed your mission.

Rewards drive interests. Scanners are motivated by specific rewards in their pursuits. These can vary from person to person but often include:

  • Learning and discovery
  • Problem-solving
  • Creative expression
  • Mastery of skills
  • Social connection

Durations vary. The time a Scanner spends on a particular interest depends on how long it takes to achieve their desired reward. This explains why Scanners often move on from projects or interests that others perceive as unfinished. Understanding your personal Rewards and Durations helps:

  • Alleviate guilt about not "finishing" projects
  • Plan more effectively for future pursuits
  • Recognize when you've achieved your goals, even if they differ from external expectations

3. Overcome Scanner panic by reframing time and setting achievable goals

You have no life-or-death decisions to make.

Reframe time perspective. Scanners often feel overwhelmed by the seemingly infinite number of interests they want to pursue and the limited time available. To combat this:

  • Use a long-term wall calendar to visualize future opportunities
  • Break down large goals into smaller, manageable tasks
  • Recognize that you don't have to do everything at once

Set realistic goals. Instead of trying to master everything immediately, focus on:

  • Quarterly or annual goals for different interests
  • Rotating priorities to give attention to various projects
  • Celebrating small achievements and progress in multiple areas

Reduce panic through action. Taking concrete steps, no matter how small, can alleviate anxiety about unfulfilled potential. Implement strategies like:

  • The Backward Planning Flowchart to break down goals into actionable steps
  • Creating accountability through Success Teams or mentors
  • Using the "start small, start now" approach to overcome inertia

4. Break free from commitment phobia by redefining success

Scanners must commit to everything that interests them.

Redefine commitment. For Scanners, commitment doesn't mean dedicating a lifetime to a single pursuit. Instead, it means:

  • Fully engaging with each interest for its natural duration
  • Allowing yourself to move on when you've achieved your desired reward
  • Recognizing that success can come from multiple, diverse experiences

Embrace flexibility. Rather than forcing yourself into a traditional career path, consider:

  • The LTTL (Learn, Try, Teach, Leave) approach to projects and jobs
  • Umbrella careers that allow for diverse experiences within a broader field
  • Creating your own unique career path that accommodates multiple interests

Value growth over permanence. Success for a Scanner often looks different from traditional metrics. Focus on:

  • Personal growth and learning from each experience
  • The unique insights and skills gained from diverse pursuits
  • How your varied experiences contribute to a rich, fulfilling life

5. Manage multiple interests with effective time and project management

If you're a Scanner, you'll find that the only useful and lasting way I've found to reduce fear is to reduce the danger that's causing it.

Implement structure. While Scanners thrive on variety, some level of organization is crucial for productivity. Consider:

  • The School Day Model: Allocating specific time blocks for different interests
  • The Avocation Station: Creating dedicated spaces for each project
  • The Scanner Planner: A customized scheduling tool for multiple pursuits

Utilize Scanner-specific tools. Adapt traditional organizational methods to fit your unique needs:

  • Scanner Daybook: A central place to capture ideas and progress across projects
  • Three-Ring Binders or Project Boxes: Organized storage for multiple ongoing interests
  • Kitchen Timer: For focused work sessions on different projects

Balance exploration and progress. Find ways to satisfy your curiosity while still moving forward:

  • Set up "taster" sessions for new interests without full commitment
  • Use the Rotating Priorities Board to give attention to various projects
  • Implement the "start small, start now" approach for new ideas

6. Finish projects strategically, focusing on personal growth over external expectations

I'm convinced you're not supposed to finish 99 percent of the projects you start under the influence of the Good Feeling. But you should start them anyway.

Redefine "finishing." For Scanners, completion often means achieving a personal goal or satisfying curiosity, not necessarily producing a final product. Embrace this by:

  • Celebrating the learning and growth from each project
  • Using the Scanner's Finish to wrap up projects when you've gotten what you needed
  • Creating a Life's Work Bookshelf to display and appreciate your diverse accomplishments

Focus on personal satisfaction. Instead of judging your projects by external standards:

  • Set your own criteria for what constitutes a "finished" project
  • Recognize the value in partial completion or exploration
  • Use your experiences to inform and enrich future pursuits

Strategically complete key projects. While not every project needs to be finished, choose some to carry through to completion:

  • Select projects that align with long-term goals or potential career paths
  • Use accountability partners or deadlines to motivate follow-through
  • Celebrate and showcase completed projects to build confidence and credibility

7. Identify your Scanner type to tailor your approach to work and life

Scanners aren't all alike.

Recognize Scanner diversity. Understanding your specific Scanner type can help you design a more fulfilling life and career. Common types include:

  • Cyclical Scanners: Return to the same interests repeatedly
    • Double Agents: Torn between two major interests
    • Sybils: Juggle many recurring interests
    • Plate Spinners: Thrive on managing multiple projects simultaneously
  • Sequential Scanners: Move from one interest to the next, rarely looking back
    • Serial Specialists: Dive deep into one area before moving to the next
    • Serial Masters: Seek to master skills in various fields
    • Jack-of-All-Trades: Enjoy learning and applying diverse skills
    • Wanderers: Explore widely without a specific end goal
    • Samplers: Seek to experience a little of everything
    • High-Speed Indecisives: Rapidly move between interests

Tailor your approach. Once you identify your Scanner type, you can:

  • Choose appropriate Life Design Models that suit your natural tendencies
  • Select careers that complement your Scanner style
  • Implement tools and strategies specific to your type of Scanner

8. Leverage your Scanner traits for unique career opportunities

There are many reasons Scanners finish before anyone expects them to, but they all have the same pattern: While the interesting part was there to keep them, Scanners stayed. When it was gone, they left.

Identify Scanner strengths. Scanners possess unique qualities that can be highly valuable in the workplace:

  • Rapid learning and adaptability
  • Broad knowledge base for creative problem-solving
  • Ability to see connections across diverse fields
  • Enthusiasm for new challenges and experiences

Explore Scanner-friendly careers. Consider roles that value versatility and quick thinking:

  • Consultants or troubleshooters
  • Researchers or information brokers
  • Journalists or writers covering diverse topics
  • Entrepreneurs or project managers
  • Motivational speakers or teachers

Create your own path. Many Scanners find success by:

  • Developing Umbrella Careers that encompass multiple interests
  • Creating businesses that leverage their diverse skills
  • Pursuing portfolio careers with multiple part-time or freelance roles
  • Alternating between different careers or fields over time

9. Design a life that accommodates your diverse interests and talents

You must explore the workings of who you are, not who you believe you ought to be.

Embrace your unique rhythm. Design your life to match your natural tendencies:

  • Use Life Design Models like the School Day Model or the Repertoire Model
  • Implement tools like the Rotating Priorities Board or Quarterly Creative Projects
  • Create physical spaces that support multiple interests, like Avocation Stations

Balance structure and flexibility. Find ways to satisfy your need for variety while maintaining progress:

  • Use the Good Enough Job to support your diverse pursuits
  • Implement the Alternating Current Model to switch between different modes of work
  • Create your own Private Museum or Annual Show-and-Tell Party to celebrate your diverse accomplishments

Cultivate a supportive environment. Surround yourself with people and resources that nurture your Scanner nature:

  • Join or create Scanner support groups or Success Teams
  • Attend Soirees or organize learning events that cater to diverse interests
  • Educate friends and family about your Scanner identity to gain understanding and support

By embracing your Scanner identity and implementing these strategies, you can create a fulfilling life that honors your multifaceted nature and allows you to thrive in a world that increasingly values versatility and adaptability.

Last updated:

FAQ

What's Refuse to Choose! about?

  • Focus on Scanners: Refuse to Choose! by Barbara Sher is about individuals known as "Scanners," who have diverse interests and struggle to commit to a single career or passion.
  • Embracing Multitalented Minds: The book encourages Scanners to embrace their multifaceted nature instead of conforming to societal expectations of specialization.
  • Practical Guidance: It provides tools and strategies for Scanners to manage their interests and create fulfilling lives without feeling pressured to choose just one path.

Why should I read Refuse to Choose!?

  • Understanding Yourself: If you feel overwhelmed by your many interests, this book helps you understand and accept your unique identity as a Scanner.
  • Empowerment: It empowers readers to stop feeling guilty about their diverse passions and instead celebrate their ability to explore multiple avenues.
  • Actionable Strategies: The book offers practical advice, such as the Scanner Daybook and the Backward Planning Flowchart, to help you take steps toward fulfilling your dreams.

What are the key takeaways of Refuse to Choose!?

  • You Are Not Alone: Many people share the Scanner experience, and recognizing this can alleviate feelings of inadequacy or confusion.
  • Stop Apologizing for Your Nature: Embrace your curiosity and diverse interests as strengths rather than weaknesses.
  • Create Your Own Path: Scanners can design their own careers and lives that incorporate their many passions.

What is a Scanner, according to Refuse to Choose!?

  • Definition of a Scanner: A Scanner is someone with a wide range of interests who feels compelled to explore many different fields rather than focusing on just one.
  • Not a Flaw: Being a Scanner is not a flaw or a sign of immaturity; it is a unique way of thinking and being.
  • Genetically Wired: Scanners are described as being "genetically wired to be interested in many things," which is a gift rather than a disability.

What is the Scanner Daybook mentioned in Refuse to Choose!?

  • Purpose of the Daybook: The Scanner Daybook is a tool for Scanners to capture their ideas, interests, and projects without the pressure of having to finish them.
  • Encourages Exploration: It allows Scanners to explore their thoughts freely, helping them to respect their ideas and creativity.
  • No Pressure to Complete: The Daybook is not about completing projects but about enjoying the process of exploration and discovery.

How can I overcome Scanner Panic as described in Refuse to Choose!?

  • Recognize Your Fears: Understand that feelings of panic often stem from the fear of not using your potential or being overwhelmed by choices.
  • Use a Calendar: Sher suggests using a wall calendar to visualize your interests and projects over time, which can help reduce feelings of panic.
  • Take Small Steps: Break down your goals into smaller, manageable tasks to make them feel less daunting and more achievable.

What is the Backward Planning Flowchart in Refuse to Choose!?

  • Planning Tool: The Backward Planning Flowchart is a method for Scanners to outline the steps needed to achieve a goal by starting from the desired outcome and working backward.
  • Identifying Steps: It helps identify what needs to be done first and what resources are required, making the process of achieving goals clearer.
  • Encourages Action: This tool nudges Scanners into action by breaking down overwhelming tasks into smaller, actionable steps.

What are the different types of Scanners mentioned in Refuse to Choose!?

  • Cyclical Scanners: These Scanners have a few major interests they return to repeatedly, such as the Double Agent, who is torn between two main passions.
  • Sybil Scanners: This type has many interests but often feels overwhelmed and confused, leading to inaction.
  • Plate Spinner Scanners: They can juggle multiple projects simultaneously but may struggle to focus on any one project long enough to see it through.

What is the Telecommuting Model in Refuse to Choose!?

  • Work from Anywhere: The Telecommuting Model allows Scanners to work remotely, giving them the flexibility to pursue other interests simultaneously.
  • Design Your Life: By telecommuting, individuals can design their lives to include both work and personal passions, creating a balance that suits their unique needs.
  • Real-Life Example: The book shares Carmen's story, who successfully negotiated a telecommuting arrangement to continue her career while pursuing her passion for working with big cats.

What is the Good Enough Job concept in Refuse to Choose!?

  • Financial Stability: The Good Enough Job is a position that provides financial security without consuming all your time and energy.
  • Freedom to Explore: This type of job doesn’t have to be fulfilling or exciting; it simply needs to be tolerable, allowing Scanners to pursue their interests outside of work.
  • Real-Life Examples: Sher shares stories of individuals who have found satisfaction in Good Enough Jobs while actively engaging in their true interests.

What is the LTTL (Learn, Try, Teach, Leave) System in Refuse to Choose!?

  • Structured Learning Approach: The LTTL System encourages Scanners to learn a new skill, try it out, teach it to others, and then move on.
  • Encourages Exploration: By teaching what you’ve learned, you reinforce your knowledge and help others while keeping the experience fresh and engaging.
  • Practical Application: The book provides examples of individuals who have successfully used this system in various fields, demonstrating its versatility and effectiveness.

What are the best quotes from Refuse to Choose! and what do they mean?

  • “Give me the chance to do my very best!”: This quote emphasizes the importance of pursuing one’s passions and striving for excellence, encouraging Scanners to embrace their diverse interests.
  • “You never know what will come of this new adventure.”: It highlights the unpredictability of exploration and the potential for unexpected rewards, reassuring Scanners that their wanderings are valuable.
  • “Life is too short to do anything twice.”: This statement reflects the mindset of many Scanners, encouraging them to embrace new experiences rather than getting stuck in routines.

Review Summary

3.97 out of 5
Average of 4k+ ratings from Goodreads and Amazon.

Refuse to Choose! resonates with many readers who struggle to focus on one career or interest. Reviewers appreciate Sher's validation of their diverse passions and her practical advice for managing multiple projects. The book's strengths include its motivational tone and strategies for embracing a multi-faceted life. Some critics find the writing repetitive and the career suggestions unrealistic. Overall, readers value the permission to pursue varied interests and the tools provided for organizing their pursuits, though opinions differ on the book's practicality and depth of research.

Your rating:

About the Author

Barbara Sher is a renowned speaker, career coach, and best-selling author of seven books on goal achievement. Her works have sold millions of copies worldwide and been translated into numerous languages. Sher has appeared on major television shows like Oprah and 60 Minutes, and her public television specials air regularly in the United States. She lectures globally at universities, Fortune 100 companies, and professional conferences. Sher's latest book, Refuse to Choose, targets "scanners" - individuals with multiple interests struggling to choose a single life direction. Her approach involves developing step-by-step programs to help people achieve their goals and embrace their diverse passions.

Other books by Barbara Sher

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