Stop Doing That Sh*t

1. You Are Hardwired to Self-Sabotage

"You self-sabotage because of something else entirely . . . Your sabotage is completely a function of the three saboteurs."

Unconscious Self-Destruction. Self-sabotage is not a conscious choice but a deeply ingrained subconscious mechanism. We repeatedly undermine our own progress without fully understanding why, creating a cycle of struggle and temporary recovery.

Self-Sabotage Manifestations:

• Destroying relationships at the point of intimacy
• Undermining career success just before a breakthrough
• Repeating destructive financial patterns
• Abandoning health goals after initial progress

Survival Mechanism. This behavior stems from our primal need for safety and predictability. By maintaining familiar patterns, even if they are harmful, we create a sense of control and certainty in an unpredictable world.

2. Your Life is a Product of Subconscious Conclusions

"The past is the template upon which our entire future is based; therefore, it's little wonder we live such lives of limitation and frustration."

Unconscious Programming. Our lives are fundamentally shaped by conclusions we made during our formative years, often without our conscious awareness. These conclusions act as invisible scripts that guide our decisions, behaviors, and experiences.

Origin of Conclusions:

• Early childhood experiences
• Interactions with family and environment
• Survival mechanisms developed in response to challenges
• Unprocessed emotional experiences

Perpetual Cycle. We continuously seek to validate these subconscious conclusions, creating a self-fulfilling prophecy that maintains our current life circumstances, regardless of our conscious desires for change.

3. The Magic Little Sponge: How Your Experiences Shape You

"You were born as a magic little sponge, open and willing and ready to absorb everything the world was presenting you with."

Childhood Absorption. We start life as malleable, open beings capable of absorbing experiences without judgment. Over time, our experiences harden into fixed beliefs and patterns that limit our potential.

Sponge Characteristics:

• Initially open and adaptable
• Absorbs experiences without filtering
• Gradually hardens with accumulated experiences
• Traps early emotional imprints

Conditioning Process. Our environment, family conversations, and early experiences slowly shape our worldview, creating a set of unconscious rules that govern our interactions and perceptions.

4. The Three Saboteurs: Conclusions About Yourself, Others, and Life

"Either you'll own it or it will own you. There's no in-between."

Fundamental Conclusions. We develop three core, often negative conclusions that dramatically influence our life trajectory:

• Conclusion about ourselves
• Conclusion about other people
• Conclusion about life itself

Impact of Saboteurs:

• Drive our automatic behaviors
• Create self-limiting patterns
• Shape our perception of possibilities
• Determine our interaction with the world

Unconscious Validation. We continuously seek to prove these conclusions true, even when they work against our best interests, creating a persistent cycle of self-fulfilling prophecies.

5. Your Point of Experience: The Starting Point of Your Life

"Every day is NOT a new day, because you are always starting from the burden of some of the earliest points of your childhood."

Familiar Starting Point. We begin each day from a familiar, subconscious location defined by our three saboteurs. This point of experience acts as an invisible anchor, pulling us back to predictable patterns.

Characteristics of Point of Experience:

• Feels like a default setting
• Provides a sense of safety
• Limits potential and exploration
• Resists fundamental change

Survival Mechanism. This point serves as a protective mechanism, keeping us within a familiar range of experiences to maintain psychological safety, even at the cost of personal growth.

6. Acceptance is the Gateway to Transformation

"Acceptance is the gateway to real change. It's also something you need to give some real thinking to."

True Acceptance. Genuine acceptance means acknowledging our patterns without judgment, creating space for transformation. It's not about agreeing with or liking our current state, but recognizing it without emotional charge.

Acceptance Strategies:

• Observe patterns without resistance
• Remove emotional reaction
• Recognize subconscious mechanisms
• Create space for new possibilities

Liberation through Observation. By witnessing our patterns without trying to change them immediately, we create the psychological space needed for genuine transformation.

7. Redirecting Your Life from the Future, Not the Past

"You never change things by fighting the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obsolete."

Future-Oriented Living. Instead of being driven by past experiences, we can design our lives by imagining and working backward from a desired future state. This approach allows for genuine innovation and transformation.

Redirection Principles:

• Visualize a new life model
• Work backward from desired outcomes
• Create systems that support new behaviors
• Detach from past limiting beliefs

Imagination as a Tool. By using imagination to design our future, we can create pathways that transcend our current limitations and break free from repetitive patterns.

8. Breaking Free from the Cycle of Self-Sabotage

"We rewrite our dreams or stuff them away in the darkness to avoid having them shattered."

Cycle Interruption. Breaking the self-sabotage cycle requires conscious awareness, strategic redirection, and a commitment to authentic self-expression.

Liberation Strategies:

• Recognize unconscious patterns
• Develop new identity-based approaches
• Create supportive environments
• Practice radical self-acceptance

Transformative Action. True change comes from understanding our subconscious mechanisms and deliberately creating new neural pathways through consistent, intentional action.

9. Understanding Your Unconscious Patterns

"Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate."

Pattern Recognition. Identifying our unconscious patterns requires deep self-reflection, honesty, and a willingness to examine our most ingrained behaviors without judgment.

Exploration Techniques:

• Journal self-observations
• Track recurring emotional and behavioral patterns
• Seek external perspectives
• Practice mindful self-examination

Awareness as Liberation. By bringing unconscious patterns into conscious awareness, we create the possibility of choice and transformation.

10. The Power of Authentic Self-Expression

"You are a human being. Yet you live as if you have some kind of limit or scarcity of being."

Unlimited Potential. Authentic self-expression involves recognizing our inherent capacity for growth, creativity, and transformation beyond our conditioned limitations.

Expression Principles:

• Embrace continuous personal evolution
• Release attachment to fixed identities
• Cultivate curiosity and openness
• Live from a place of abundance

Transcending Limitations. By committing to genuine self-expression, we can break free from restrictive patterns and live more fully, creatively, and authentically.

Last updated: January 23, 2025