The Way of Men

1. The Way of Men is the Way of the Gang

The Way of Men is the way of the gang.

Primal masculinity is rooted in the small, tight-knit groups that men have formed throughout history for survival, hunting, and warfare. These gangs represent the most basic unit of male social organization, where men establish hierarchies, develop bonds, and define what it means to be a man among men. In this context, masculinity is less about individual achievements and more about how men relate to and prove themselves to other men within the group.

Key aspects of gang dynamics:

• Establishing a perimeter (us vs. them mentality)
• Developing a shared identity and culture
• Creating and enforcing social hierarchies
• Competing for status within the group
• Cooperating for mutual survival and success

The gang model explains why men often feel most alive and fulfilled when working together in small teams, whether in sports, military units, or other male-dominated environments. It also sheds light on why many men struggle to find meaning in modern society, where such primal group dynamics are often lacking or discouraged.

2. Strength, Courage, Mastery, and Honor: The Tactical Virtues

Strength, Courage, Mastery, and Honor are the alpha virtues of men all over the world.

The four tactical virtues form the core of masculinity across cultures and throughout history. They are the qualities that men have consistently valued and sought to embody in their pursuit of being "good at being a man."

1. Strength: Physical power and the ability to exert one's will.
2. Courage: The willingness to face danger and take risks.
3. Mastery: Competence and skill in valuable areas.
4. Honor: Loyalty to the group and concern for one's reputation among other men.

These virtues are considered "tactical" because they directly relate to men's historical roles as hunters, warriors, and protectors. They are the qualities that would have been most valuable in a survival situation or conflict. While the specific expression of these virtues may vary across cultures, their fundamental importance to masculinity remains constant.

3. Being a Good Man vs. Being Good at Being a Man

There is a difference between being a good man and being good at being a man.

This crucial distinction separates moral virtue from masculine competence. Being a good man is about ethics, morality, and behaving in ways that benefit society as a whole. Being good at being a man is about embodying the tactical virtues and fulfilling the traditional male role effectively.

Key differences:

• A good man: Focuses on moral behavior, kindness, honesty, etc.
• Good at being a man: Emphasizes strength, courage, mastery, and honor

While these two concepts can overlap, they are not identical. A man can be morally upright but lack the qualities traditionally associated with masculinity. Conversely, a man can excel at traditional masculine virtues while behaving in ways that might be considered morally questionable.

This distinction helps explain why men often admire or respect "bad men" who demonstrate exceptional strength, courage, or mastery, even if they don't approve of their actions morally. It also highlights the tension many modern men feel between societal expectations of moral goodness and their innate drive to prove themselves as men among men.

4. The Perimeter: Men's Primal Role as Protectors

It has always been the job of men to draw the perimeter, to establish a safe space, to separate us from them and create a circle of trust.

The concept of the perimeter is fundamental to understanding men's historical role and the source of many masculine behaviors. Throughout human history, men have been responsible for protecting the group from external threats, whether those threats came from nature, animals, or other groups of humans.

Key aspects of the perimeter:

• Defining who is "us" and who is "them"
• Establishing and defending boundaries
• Creating a safe space for the group to thrive
• Requiring constant vigilance and readiness

This primal role as protectors has shaped men's psychology and social dynamics. It explains why men tend to form tight-knit groups, why they are often more comfortable with hierarchical structures, and why they place such high value on strength, courage, and loyalty.

The perimeter concept also helps explain why many men feel lost or purposeless in modern society, where physical protection is less necessary and often outsourced to specialized professionals like police or military personnel. The primal drive to protect and defend remains, even when there is no clear threat to guard against.

5. The Crisis of Masculinity in Modern Civilization

If there is a "crisis of masculinity," this is it, and the problem is as old as civilization itself.

The tension between civilization and masculinity has existed since the earliest human societies. As civilizations develop, they inevitably require men to restrain their more primal masculine impulses for the sake of social order and cooperation on a larger scale.

Key factors contributing to the crisis:

• Reduced need for physical strength and protection
• Increased emphasis on cooperation over competition
• Blurring of gender roles and expectations
• Loss of clear rites of passage into manhood
• Decline of male-only spaces and institutions

This ongoing crisis has led to a situation where many men feel disconnected from their masculine nature, unsure of their role in society, and lacking clear ways to prove their worth as men. The problem is exacerbated in modern times by rapid technological and social changes that have further diminished traditional male roles.

The challenge lies in finding a balance between the benefits of civilization and the need for men to express and fulfill their masculine nature in healthy and constructive ways.

6. The Bonobo Masturbation Society: A Critique of Modern Male Passivity

What the modern world offers average men is a thousand and one ways to safely spank our monkey brains into oblivion.

The author's scathing critique of modern society compares it to the behavior of bonobo apes, known for their peaceful but highly sexualized social structure. In this analogy, modern men have become passive, conflict-averse, and overly focused on shallow pleasures and distractions.

Characteristics of the "bonobo masturbation society:"

• Emphasis on comfort and safety over challenge and risk
• Replacement of real experiences with virtual or vicarious ones
• Obsession with entertainment and shallow pleasures
• Lack of meaningful male bonding and competition
• Diminished importance of traditional masculine virtues

This state of affairs is seen as deeply unfulfilling for men, who are left without clear ways to prove their worth or experience the kind of vital, meaningful existence that their ancestors knew. The abundance of easy pleasures and distractions serves to keep men docile and compliant, rather than encouraging them to strive for greatness or challenge the status quo.

The author argues that this situation is not only detrimental to individual men but also to society as a whole, as it leads to a lack of strong, capable men who can face real challenges and protect their communities when necessary.

7. Starting the World: Reasserting Masculine Values in a Changing World

In the chaos that follows disappointment, gangs of men can restart the world.

The author's call to action suggests that the current global system is unsustainable and that its inevitable collapse will create opportunities for men to reassert traditional masculine values and ways of organizing society.

Key ideas for "starting the world:"

• Embrace localism over globalism
• Form small, tight-knit groups of like-minded men
• Cultivate the tactical virtues of strength, courage, mastery, and honor
• Reject passive consumerism in favor of active creation and problem-solving
• Prepare for potential societal breakdowns and power vacuums

This vision is not about returning to a mythical past, but about creating new forms of male organization and identity that balance the benefits of modern knowledge with the primal needs of masculine nature. The author sees the potential breakdown of current systems not as a disaster to be feared, but as an opportunity for men to reclaim their vital role in shaping the world.

The challenge for modern men is to find ways to embody these masculine virtues and create meaningful male communities within the constraints of current society, while also preparing for a potential future where such qualities may become not just personally fulfilling, but essential for survival and prosperity.

Last updated: January 23, 2025