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The Willpower Instinct

The Willpower Instinct

How Self-Control Works, Why It Matters, and What You Can Do to Get More of It
作者 Kelly McGonigal 2011 275 页数
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重点摘要

1. 意志力是一种生物本能,而非单纯的美德

意志力本能令人惊叹:得益于大脑的辛勤工作和身体的协作,你的选择可以由长远目标驱动,而非恐慌或即时满足的需求。

进化适应。 意志力作为一种生存机制进化而来,帮助人类延迟满足、群体合作并追求长远目标。负责自我控制的前额叶皮层随着人类面对日益复杂的社会挑战而不断扩展。

生物基础。 自我控制依赖于“暂停与计划”反应,这是一种与“战斗或逃跑”压力反应截然不同的生理状态。其特征包括:

  • 心率变异性增加
  • 血压降低
  • 呼吸减缓
  • 肌肉放松

意志力的三种力量。 意志力本能表现为三种不同的能力:

  1. “我能做”的力量:完成必要任务的能力
  2. “我不会做”的力量:抵抗诱惑的能力
  3. “我想要”的力量:牢记长远目标的能力

2. 自我控制如同肌肉,可以被锻炼强化

如果我们每天都试图跑一场意志力马拉松,最终只会彻底崩溃。挑战在于像聪明的运动员一样训练,既要突破极限,也要合理掌控节奏。

有限资源模型。 自我控制似乎依赖于有限的心理能量储备。随着一天中意志力的消耗,这种资源逐渐枯竭,后续的自控行为变得更加困难。

训练效果。 意志力如同肌肉,经过规律锻炼可以增强。研究表明,练习小规模的自控行为(如改善姿势或记录开销)能提升其他无关领域的自控能力。

恢复至关重要。 正如肌肉需要休息才能变强,意志力也需要时间恢复。补充意志力的策略包括:

  • 充足睡眠
  • 放松技巧练习
  • 参与愉快活动
  • 保持健康饮食

3. 压力是意志力的最大敌人

我们常误以为压力是完成任务的唯一动力,甚至会刻意制造压力——比如拖到最后一刻,或自责懒惰失控——以此激励自己。

生理不兼容。 压力反应(战斗或逃跑)与意志力反应(暂停与计划)在生理上相互排斥。压力激素如皮质醇会削弱前额叶皮层的控制能力。

压力引发的渴望。 处于压力状态时,大脑更倾向于寻求即时奖励和满足,导致对以下事物的渴望增强:

  • 安慰食物
  • 酒精和毒品
  • 冲动购物
  • 拖延行为

打破恶性循环。 提升意志力的关键在于有效管理压力。经验证的减压方法包括:

  • 规律运动
  • 正念冥想
  • 深呼吸练习
  • 社交支持
  • 亲近自然

4. 道德许可削弱自我控制努力

当我们内心有冲突的欲望时,做好事往往成为放纵坏习惯的借口。

许可效应。 当我们做了美德行为或取得进展时,常会觉得有理由放纵与目标无关的恶习。这种现象称为道德许可,可能破坏我们的长远目标。

常见表现。 道德许可在多种情境中出现:

  • 节食者运动后奖励自己不健康食物
  • 环保消费者买了绿色产品后觉得可以做出不环保选择
  • 人们在确认自己无偏见后更容易表达偏见观点

克服许可陷阱。 避免陷入道德许可的策略:

  • 关注承诺而非进展
  • 时刻提醒自己核心价值观和长远目标
  • 将美德行为视为身份的一部分,而非偶尔的善举

5. 大脑的奖赏系统常将“渴望”误认为“幸福”

进化并不关心幸福本身,而是利用幸福的承诺驱使我们不断挣扎求生。

多巴胺的作用。 神经递质多巴胺负责产生“渴望”的感觉,而非直接带来愉悦。该系统进化用于激励我们追求生存所需的奖励。

现代环境错配。 当今环境中,奖赏系统可能误导我们:

  • 持续接触诱惑(如垃圾食品、社交媒体)触发多巴胺释放
  • 奖赏的承诺往往超过实际获得时的满足感
  • 这种错配可能导致成瘾行为和长期不满

管理欲望的策略:

  • 有意识地观察渴望而不立即行动
  • 与诱惑保持距离
  • 关注消费的真实体验,而非仅仅期待
  • 培养与长远目标一致的真正满足感来源

6. 压制思想和情绪往往适得其反

讽刺的是,宽恕而非内疚,才更能提升责任感。

反弹效应。 试图压制不想要的思想或情绪,往往会使其频率和强度增加。这种现象称为反弹效应,适用于多种情境:

  • 节食者越想避开禁忌食物越难以忘怀
  • 焦虑者越想不担心反而越焦虑
  • 成瘾者越想忽视渴望反而越强烈

接受作为替代。 与其压制,不如接受并观察思想和情绪而不加评判:

  • 正念技巧有助于减弱不想要思想的力量
  • 接受渴望而不行动,能让其自然消退
  • 自我慈悲胜过自我批评,有助于更好自控

实用方法:

  • 采用“冲浪渴望”技巧应对欲望
  • 练习正念冥想提升对思想的觉察
  • 面对挫折时运用自我慈悲

7. 自我觉察与自我慈悲是意志力的关键

如果有提升自控的秘诀,科学指向一个方向:专注的力量。

自我觉察的重要性。 识别何时需要意志力做出选择,是发挥自控的关键。许多决策是在无意识状态下做出的。

自我慈悲胜过自我批评。 研究显示,自我慈悲比自我批评更能激励行为改变:

  • 自我批评常导致放弃或自我破坏
  • 自我慈悲促进责任感和从错误中学习

培养方法:

  • 定期练习正念冥想
  • 记录意志力日记,追踪决策和模式
  • 面对挑战时使用自我慈悲的内心对话
  • 经常反思价值观和长远目标

8. 社会影响显著左右我们的自我控制

我们的脑海中,其他人的目标、信念和行为在很大程度上融入了我们的决策。

社会传染。 行为(包括自控相关)如同传染病般在社交网络中传播,既有正面也有负面影响:

  • 肥胖
  • 吸烟习惯
  • 运动习惯
  • 财务决策

镜像神经元。 大脑中有专门细胞在观察他人行为时激活,使我们易于模仿和共情。这导致:

  • 无意识地模仿他人行为
  • 感染周围人的情绪
  • 采纳观察对象的目标

利用社会影响:

  • 与展现理想自控的人为伍
  • 公开承诺目标
  • 利用社交支持系统增强责任感
  • 注意自身行为对他人的影响

9. 睡眠、运动和饮食对意志力至关重要

若想增强自控,需考虑如何支持最疲惫的自己,而非指望理想状态的自己出现拯救。

睡眠不足。 缺觉损害前额叶皮层功能,导致:

  • 情绪调节能力下降
  • 决策能力受损
  • 容易屈服诱惑

运动益处。 规律锻炼提升意志力,表现为:

  • 心率变异性增加
  • 压力减轻
  • 情绪和能量改善
  • 大脑功能增强,尤其是自控相关区域

饮食因素。 饮食影响自控能力:

  • 稳定血糖对维持意志力至关重要
  • 富含复合碳水化合物和蛋白质的饮食支持持续能量
  • 高度加工食品和糖分会导致能量崩溃和自控下降

实用建议:

  • 保证每晚7-9小时睡眠
  • 规律进行体育活动,即使是短时段
  • 均衡饮食,注重全食物摄入
  • 全天保持水分充足

10. 正念冥想提升自我控制能力

冥想增加前额叶皮层的血流,就像举重增加肌肉血流一样。

神经科学证据。 规律冥想带来:

  • 前额叶皮层灰质增加
  • 自控相关脑区连接增强
  • 注意力集中和抗干扰能力提升

实际益处。 正念冥想助力意志力:

  • 减轻压力及其对自控的负面影响
  • 增强对思想和冲动的觉察
  • 改善情绪调节
  • 提升延迟满足的能力

入门建议:

  • 从每天5分钟短时练习开始
  • 专注呼吸感受
  • 思绪游离时,温和地将注意力拉回呼吸
  • 随着习惯养成,逐渐延长练习时间

坚持是关键——即使是每天短暂的练习,长期也能显著提升自控力。

最后更新日期:

FAQ

What's The Willpower Instinct about?

  • Understanding Willpower: The book delves into the science of self-control, explaining how willpower functions as a biological instinct that can be trained and improved.
  • Three Powers of Willpower: It introduces "I will," "I won't," and "I want" as the three essential components of self-control, each crucial for achieving goals and resisting temptations.
  • Practical Strategies: Kelly McGonigal combines scientific research with practical exercises to help readers develop their willpower and overcome common challenges.

Why should I read The Willpower Instinct?

  • Improve Self-Control: If you struggle with procrastination or maintaining healthy habits, the book offers strategies to enhance self-control and understand willpower mechanisms.
  • Scientific Basis: Authored by a health psychologist, it integrates findings from psychology, neuroscience, and economics, providing a solid foundation for its strategies.
  • Life-Changing Results: Many readers report significant improvements in their lives, describing the book as transformative in understanding and harnessing willpower.

What are the key takeaways of The Willpower Instinct?

  • Willpower is Trainable: Willpower can be developed like a muscle through practice, leading to lasting improvements in various life aspects.
  • Stress Impacts Willpower: Stress and negative emotions deplete willpower, making it harder to resist temptations, highlighting the need for effective stress management.
  • Moral Licensing: Feeling good about past behaviors can lead to indulgence in unhealthy choices, a pattern that can be recognized and managed for better self-control.

What are the three powers of willpower defined in The Willpower Instinct?

  • "I Will" Power: This involves committing to actions that align with your goals, even when they are difficult, emphasizing proactive steps toward achievement.
  • "I Won't" Power: It involves resisting temptations and saying no to immediate desires that conflict with long-term goals, crucial for maintaining self-control.
  • "I Want" Power: This focuses on remembering true desires and motivations, helping you stay connected to long-term goals and providing motivation for self-control.

How does stress affect willpower according to The Willpower Instinct?

  • Increased Cravings: Stress triggers cravings for comfort foods and indulgences as the brain seeks relief from negative emotions, leading to poor choices.
  • Physiological Response: Stress activates the brain's reward system, making temptations more appealing and overwhelming the ability to resist.
  • Managing Stress: Effective stress-relief strategies, such as exercise and mindfulness, are emphasized to preserve willpower and maintain self-control.

What is the "pause-and-plan" response mentioned in The Willpower Instinct?

  • Internal Conflict Recognition: This response is triggered when recognizing an internal conflict, helping you slow down and think before acting.
  • Physiological Changes: It leads to changes that promote calmness and focus, contrasting with the fight-or-flight response, allowing for better self-control.
  • Self-Monitoring: Involves self-monitoring to identify warning signs of impulsive behavior, enabling proactive steps to maintain self-control.

What is the "what-the-hell effect" in The Willpower Instinct?

  • Cycle of Indulgence: Describes how a small lapse in self-control can lead to further indulgence, thinking, "What the hell, I've already messed up."
  • Guilt and Regret: Often accompanied by guilt and shame, leading to more indulgence and reinforcing negative behaviors.
  • Breaking the Cycle: Recognizing this effect can help avoid the trap by reframing your mindset and focusing on long-term goals.

How does The Willpower Instinct explain the role of stress in self-control?

  • Stress Depletes Willpower: Stress drains self-control resources, making it harder to resist temptations and leading to willpower failures.
  • Physiological Response: Activates the fight-or-flight response, impairing the prefrontal cortex responsible for self-control, making rational decisions difficult.
  • Managing Stress: Emphasizes stress management techniques like exercise and mindfulness to maintain willpower and resist temptations.

What is the "ironic rebound" effect discussed in The Willpower Instinct?

  • Definition: Occurs when trying to suppress a thought makes it more persistent, like trying not to think about a white bear.
  • Cognitive Processes: Involves two brain systems: one controlling thoughts and another monitoring for unwanted thoughts, leading to increased focus on suppressed thoughts.
  • Acceptance Strategy: Suggests accepting thoughts and feelings rather than suppressing them, reducing their power and helping regain control.

How can I apply the concepts from The Willpower Instinct to my daily life?

  • Set Specific Goals: Identify a specific willpower challenge to tackle, such as eating healthier or managing stress, to apply strategies effectively.
  • Practice Self-Monitoring: Track choices and behaviors related to your willpower challenge to identify patterns and triggers leading to failures.
  • Use Willpower Experiments: Engage in practical exercises like meditation or tracking willpower choices to build self-control over time.

How does The Willpower Instinct address the concept of moral licensing?

  • Definition: Moral licensing is when individuals feel justified in indulging after doing something good, leading to self-sabotaging behavior.
  • Impact on Self-Control: Good deeds are viewed as credit for later indulgence, undermining long-term goals and leading to a cycle of indulgence.
  • Awareness and Balance: Being aware of this tendency and finding balance in choices can help make consistent decisions aligned with goals.

What are the best quotes from The Willpower Instinct and what do they mean?

  • "Feeling bad leads to giving in": Highlights how negative emotions can trigger indulgence, emphasizing the importance of managing emotions for self-control.
  • "Self-compassion is a far better strategy than beating ourselves up": Stresses the value of treating oneself kindly in setbacks, fostering resilience and motivation.
  • "Trying to suppress thoughts, emotions, and cravings backfires": Encourages accepting thoughts and feelings as a healthier approach to self-control, avoiding the pitfalls of suppression.

评论

4.13 满分 5
平均评分来自 32k+ 来自Goodreads和亚马逊的评分.

《意志力本能》因其科学视角解析和提升意志力的方法而广受好评。读者们认可书中实用的建议、练习以及对人类心理的深刻洞察。许多人认为它有助于应对个人挑战,养成更好的习惯。该书以通俗易懂的语言和强调自我关怀的态度赢得赞誉。虽然部分读者觉得内容有时略显重复或显而易见,但总体而言,它被视为提升自控力、实现长期目标的重要参考资料。

Your rating:
4.56
94 评分

关于作者

凯利·麦格尼格尔博士是斯坦福大学的健康心理学家和讲师。她被公认为身心关系领域的权威专家,著有多部心理学与个人成长方面的著作。麦格尼格尔致力于将心理学科学应用于提升个人健康、幸福感及社会变革。她的作品如《意志力的本能》和《压力的积极面》因其将复杂心理学概念转化为实用方法而广受欢迎。麦格尼格尔同时也是获奖的科学记者,具备冥想与瑜伽教学经验。她的专业领域涵盖神经科学、压力管理及行为改变等多个方面。

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