Discovery in the Library

Suzie, a young woman, grows up feeling isolated and confused about her sexuality, especially after the death of her father and her mother's emotional withdrawal. Her first sexual experience as a teenager leads to a bizarre discovery: when she orgasms, time literally stops for her. She calls this strange, glowing, frozen world "The Quiet." Alone with her secret, Suzie finds solace in books and the library, which becomes both her sanctuary and the symbol of her longing for understanding and connection. This chapter sets the stage for her journey of self-discovery and the search for someone who can understand her unique experience.

The Time-Stopping Secret

As Suzie grows older, she experiments with her ability, trying to understand its limits and meaning. She realizes that the world resumes only when she is ready, but she remains isolated, unable to share her secret with anyone. The power is both a gift and a curse, offering her escape from pain but also deepening her loneliness. The library, threatened by foreclosure, becomes a metaphor for her own endangered sense of belonging. Suzie's secret shapes her relationships and her worldview, making her both curious and cautious about intimacy.

Jon's Parallel Power

Jon, a young man with a troubled past and a similar time-stopping power, narrates his own journey. Like Suzie, he discovers his ability during adolescence, but his response is more rebellious and self-destructive. Jon's life is marked by frustration, anger, and a sense of alienation, especially as he works a dead-end job at the very bank threatening Suzie's library. His power, which he calls "Cumworld," becomes a coping mechanism for his dissatisfaction and a symbol of his desire to break free from societal constraints.

Awkward First Encounters

Suzie and Jon meet at a party, instantly connecting over their shared sense of not fitting in. Their chemistry is immediate, but it's only after an intimate encounter that they realize they both possess the same time-stopping ability. This revelation is both exhilarating and terrifying, as they finally find someone who understands their secret. Their relationship quickly deepens, fueled by the thrill of shared power and the relief of not being alone. Together, they begin to explore the possibilities—and dangers—of their unique connection.

Shared Confessions

Suzie and Jon open up about their pasts, sharing the pain and confusion that shaped them. Their mutual vulnerability strengthens their bond, but also exposes old wounds. They discuss the implications of their powers, debating whether they are a blessing or a curse. The library's financial crisis looms over them, and Jon's resentment toward his job and the banking system intensifies. Their relationship becomes a partnership, united by love, trauma, and a desire to make a difference.

The Bank Robbery Plan

Faced with the imminent closure of Suzie's beloved library, the couple hatches a plan: use their time-stopping ability to rob the bank where Jon works and save the library. The plan is both a romantic gesture and an act of rebellion against a system that has failed them. Their heist preparations are filled with humor, anxiety, and a sense of purpose. The act of planning the robbery becomes a metaphor for taking control of their lives and rewriting the rules that have constrained them.

Enter the Sex Police

During their first attempt at the heist, Suzie and Jon encounter a bizarre trio known as the Sex Police—mysterious figures who also operate in the frozen world of post-orgasmic time. The Sex Police warn them that their actions have consequences and that there are rules to this secret world. The couple is shocked to learn they are not as unique as they thought, and that their rebellion has attracted powerful, enigmatic adversaries. The Sex Police's presence raises the stakes and introduces a new layer of danger and intrigue.

Escalating Consequences

Suzie and Jon's encounter with the Sex Police leaves them shaken and paranoid. They realize that their actions are being watched and that the consequences of their rebellion extend beyond themselves. The couple grapples with guilt, fear, and the realization that their powers come with responsibilities. Their relationship is tested as they debate whether to continue their plan or retreat into safety. The threat of exposure and punishment looms, forcing them to confront the limits of their defiance.

The Past Haunts

As the pressure mounts, both Suzie and Jon are haunted by memories of their troubled childhoods and the traumas that shaped them. Suzie's grief over her father and Jon's anger at his own upbringing resurface, influencing their decisions and interactions. Their vulnerabilities threaten to drive them apart, even as they cling to each other for support. The past becomes a battleground, with old wounds complicating their present challenges and deepening their emotional stakes.

Cracks in the Plan

The couple's unity begins to fracture under the strain of their situation. Suzie questions the morality of their actions, while Jon becomes increasingly reckless and desperate. Their differing approaches to risk and responsibility create tension, and the threat of the Sex Police intensifies their anxiety. The cracks in their plan mirror the cracks in their relationship, as love and trust are tested by fear and uncertainty. The dream of saving the library seems increasingly out of reach.

Love and Guilt Collide

Suzie and Jon struggle with guilt over their actions and the impact on those around them. Their love is both a source of strength and a cause of pain, as they wrestle with the consequences of their choices. The couple is forced to confront uncomfortable truths about themselves and each other, questioning whether their relationship can survive the weight of their secrets. The collision of love and guilt becomes the emotional core of their journey.

The Pursuit Intensifies

The Sex Police escalate their efforts to capture Suzie and Jon, using increasingly aggressive tactics. The couple is forced into a game of cat and mouse, relying on their wits and their powers to evade capture. The pursuit becomes a metaphor for the struggle to maintain autonomy and identity in the face of external control. The tension mounts as the couple realizes that their freedom—and their relationship—hangs in the balance.

Facing the Sex Police

Suzie and Jon are finally cornered by the Sex Police, leading to a tense confrontation. The enforcers reveal more about the rules of the time-stopping world and the reasons for their intervention. Suzie and Jon must negotiate for their freedom, using their intelligence and emotional connection to outmaneuver their adversaries. The encounter forces them to reckon with the consequences of their actions and the responsibilities that come with power.

Truths and Vulnerabilities

In the aftermath of the confrontation, Suzie and Jon are forced to be brutally honest with each other and themselves. They confront their deepest fears, insecurities, and desires, laying bare the truths that have driven their actions. This emotional reckoning brings them closer together, even as it exposes the fragility of their bond. The couple emerges with a deeper understanding of themselves and each other.

Escape and Uncertainty

Suzie and Jon manage to escape the immediate threat of the Sex Police, but their future remains uncertain. They are fugitives, cut off from the lives they once knew. The uncertainty of their situation is both terrifying and liberating, as they are forced to rely on each other more than ever. The escape marks a turning point, as the couple embraces the unknown and the possibility of a new beginning.

A New Understanding

As they adjust to their new reality, Suzie and Jon reflect on what they have learned about themselves, their powers, and their relationship. They come to accept the complexity of their situation and the ambiguity of their morality. The couple finds strength in their shared vulnerability and the knowledge that they are not alone. Their journey becomes one of growth, acceptance, and the search for meaning in a world that defies easy answers.

The World Against Them

Suzie and Jon realize that they are outsiders, misunderstood and hunted by those who fear their difference. The world seems arrayed against them, but they refuse to be defined by others' expectations. Their defiance becomes an act of love and self-assertion, as they choose to live on their own terms. The couple's isolation is both a burden and a source of freedom, as they carve out a space for themselves in a hostile world.

Choosing Each Other

In the end, Suzie and Jon reaffirm their commitment to each other, choosing love and partnership over fear and isolation. Their journey has tested them in ways they never imagined, but it has also brought them closer together. The couple faces an uncertain future, but they do so together, united by their shared experiences and the knowledge that they are stronger together than apart.

Characters

Suzie

Suzie is the emotional heart of the story, shaped by early loss and a sense of isolation. Her discovery of her time-stopping power is both a metaphor for her emotional detachment and a literal escape from pain. Suzie's journey is one of self-discovery, as she seeks understanding, connection, and agency in a world that often feels indifferent or hostile. Her relationship with Jon is transformative, offering her both companionship and a mirror for her own struggles. Suzie's resilience and empathy drive the narrative, as she navigates love, guilt, and the search for meaning.

Jon

Jon is Suzie's counterpart, marked by anger, frustration, and a desire to break free from societal constraints. His time-stopping power is a symbol of his need for control and escape. Jon's relationship with Suzie is both healing and challenging, as it forces him to confront his own vulnerabilities and responsibilities. His rebellious streak leads him to embrace risk and defiance, but also exposes him to danger and self-doubt. Jon's development is shaped by his willingness to love and be loved, even as he struggles with his own demons.

The Sex Police

The Sex Police are a trio of figures who enforce the rules of the time-stopping world. Their motives are ambiguous, blending elements of authority, surveillance, and moral judgment. They represent the external forces that seek to control and punish those who deviate from societal norms. The Sex Police's presence introduces a sense of danger and uncertainty, challenging Suzie and Jon to question the boundaries of their power and the meaning of rebellion.

Suzie's Mother

Suzie's mother is a background figure whose emotional absence shapes Suzie's sense of isolation. Her inability to cope with her husband's death leaves Suzie to navigate adolescence and sexuality alone. The mother-daughter relationship is marked by silence and misunderstanding, highlighting the generational and emotional gaps that define Suzie's early life.

Dr. Ana Kincaid

Dr. Kincaid is a therapist who helps Suzie process her experiences and emotions. She provides a safe space for Suzie to explore her feelings and make sense of her powers. Dr. Kincaid's guidance is crucial in helping Suzie move from confusion to acceptance, offering wisdom and empathy without judgment.

Rachel

Rachel is Suzie's best friend and confidante, offering support and perspective throughout the story. She serves as a sounding board for Suzie's fears and ambitions, grounding her in reality and providing a counterpoint to her more impulsive tendencies. Rachel's loyalty and pragmatism are essential to Suzie's journey.

Robert

Robert is Jon's boss at the bank and the face of the institution threatening Suzie's library. He embodies the impersonal forces of capitalism and bureaucracy, serving as both an obstacle and a symbol of the system the protagonists rebel against.

Suzie's Father

Suzie's father's early death is a defining event in her life, shaping her sense of loss and longing. His memory serves as both a source of comfort and a reminder of what she has lost, influencing her relationships and her search for meaning.

Matt

Matt is a friend who provides humor and levity in the midst of the story's darker moments. His presence highlights the importance of friendship and community, even as the protagonists grapple with extraordinary challenges.

Myrtle Spurge

Myrtle is the most prominent member of the Sex Police, embodying the group's authoritarian tendencies. Her strict adherence to the rules and her willingness to use force make her a formidable adversary, challenging Suzie and Jon to outwit and outmaneuver her.

Plot Devices

Time-Stopping Orgasm

The central plot device is the ability of Suzie and Jon to stop time when they orgasm, creating a surreal, glowing world where they can act without consequence—at least initially. This device serves as both a metaphor for emotional detachment and a literal tool for rebellion. It allows the narrative to explore themes of intimacy, power, and alienation, while also providing opportunities for humor, suspense, and social commentary.

Dual Narrative Structure

The story is told from both Suzie's and Jon's points of view, allowing readers to see events through their distinct lenses. This structure enhances the emotional depth of the narrative, highlighting the similarities and differences in their experiences. It also allows for a nuanced exploration of gender, trauma, and desire.

The Sex Police

The introduction of the Sex Police adds a layer of danger and complexity to the story. Their presence forces the protagonists to confront the consequences of their actions and raises questions about authority, morality, and the limits of rebellion. The Sex Police serve as both literal antagonists and symbols of societal control.

Heist Motif

The plan to rob the bank using their powers is a classic heist motif, reimagined through the lens of sexual empowerment and social critique. The heist becomes a metaphor for taking control of one's destiny and challenging unjust systems, while also highlighting the risks and moral ambiguities of such actions.

Analysis

Sex Criminals, Vol. 1: One Weird Trick is a bold, irreverent exploration of sexuality, trauma, and rebellion, using the fantastical premise of time-stopping orgasms to probe deeper questions about intimacy, power, and societal norms. At its core, the story is about two damaged people finding connection and agency in a world that often feels alienating and oppressive. The narrative's blend of humor, vulnerability, and social critique challenges readers to reconsider their assumptions about sex, love, and authority. By framing sexual experience as both a source of power and a site of conflict, the book invites reflection on the ways in which personal liberation can collide with external control. Ultimately, Sex Criminals is a celebration of difference, resilience, and the messy, complicated beauty of human connection.

Last updated: May 24, 2025