Six-Minute X-Ray

1. Mastery Requires Skill, Not Just Knowledge

Skills beat information. That’s what the 6MX is all about.

Levels of Expertise. The book outlines four levels of mastery, from the novice "Grey's Anatomy Guy" to the expert "Surgeon," emphasizing that true mastery comes from practical application and honed skills, not just theoretical knowledge. The author positions himself as the college that educates you and gives you the degree, but the practice is up to you.

Information vs. Skill. The author stresses the importance of developing real-world skills over simply accumulating information. He argues that while knowledge is valuable, the ability to apply that knowledge and perform techniques is what truly sets experts apart.

Behavioral Surgeon. The ultimate goal is to become a "behavioral surgeon," someone who can skillfully analyze and understand human behavior in real-time. This requires dedicated practice and the ability to adapt techniques to various situations.

2. Nonverbal Communication Dominates Human Interaction

For simplicity’s sake, we will simply use the 2/3 rule for this. So somewhere around 66% of communication with people is nonverbal.

The 2/3 Rule. The author posits that approximately two-thirds of communication is nonverbal, highlighting the critical role of body language, facial expressions, and other nonverbal cues in understanding human behavior. This is based on the idea that language is a relatively recent development in human history, and our brains are wired to communicate nonverbally.

Brain Evolution. The human brain evolved in three fundamental parts: the reptilian brain, the mammalian brain, and the neocortex. The mammalian brain, which predates language, is responsible for reading the behaviors of others and communicating nonverbally.

Intuition and Gut Feelings. The mammalian brain constantly scans other people's behavior, and when it detects something that doesn't add up, it triggers a "gut feeling" or intuition. This is because the mammalian brain deals in behavior and emotion, not language.

3. Everyone Wears a Mask, Hiding Suffering and Insecurity

One thing you will begin to see on a daily basis after learning how to read behavior is that people tend to look sadder and more scared.

The Four Laws of Behavior. The author introduces four laws of behavior that serve as a filter for understanding human interactions:

• Everyone is suffering and insecure.
• Everyone is wearing a mask.
• Everyone pretends not to wear a mask.
• Everyone is a product of childhood suffering and reward.

Social Acceptance. These laws highlight the inherent fragility of humans and their desire for social acceptance. People present an image to the world, often concealing their true feelings and insecurities.

Childhood Influence. Our beliefs and behavioral patterns are largely formed unconsciously during childhood. Understanding this can help us see people through a lens of compassion and empathy.

4. Behavioral Elements Reveal Hidden Truths

When we read behavior, context is key.

The Attribution Error. The author cautions against the attribution error, which occurs when we assign a singular meaning to a single gesture without considering the context. Instead, he emphasizes the importance of understanding the context, topic, or subject that caused a particular behavior.

Behavioral Table of Elements (BTE). The BTE is a tool designed to analyze behavior by combining various elements to form a cohesive opinion. It resembles the Periodic Table of Elements, with each cell representing a specific behavior and its associated characteristics.

Clusters of Behaviors. The BTE emphasizes the importance of combining multiple behavioral elements to form a comprehensive understanding of a person's state of mind. Without context and clusters, observations are meaningless.

5. The Eyes Offer a Window into the Mind

If you only studied the behavior of the human eye, you’d still be privy to more information than anyone else in the room.

Blink Rate. The frequency of blinking can indicate stress, discomfort, interest, and focus. A normal blink rate is around nine times per minute, while stressful situations can increase it to upwards of seventy times per minute.

Gestural Hemispheric Tendency (GHT). Our eyes move to access memories, and the direction they move can indicate whether we are recalling positive or negative information. By identifying a person's GHT, you can influence their mental state by moving in the direction associated with positive memories.

Eye Home. Each person has an "Eye Home," a specific direction they typically look to access memories. Deviations from this baseline can indicate deception, doubt, or fabrication.

6. The Face Betrays Emotions and Intentions

All emotions leave clues, and it’s our job to figure out not whodunnit, but whatdunnit.

Lip Compression. Squeezing the lips together indicates withheld opinions. This behavior can reveal hidden objections or disagreements.

Object Insertion. Placing objects in the mouth, such as a pen or hair, suggests a need for reassurance. This behavior should be a red flag, prompting you to provide comfort or address underlying concerns.

True vs. False Expressions. Genuine facial expressions fade off the face, while false expressions stop suddenly. False expressions are also more likely to be asymmetrical, with more muscular tension on one side of the face than the other.

7. Body Language Speaks Volumes, Revealing Stress and Intent

The feet are furthest from the head. They are far more likely to betray our intent nonverbally than our other body parts, which live closer to the brain and are easier for us to manage.

Crossed Arms. Ignore simple arm-crossing behavior, but pay attention to the fingers. Relaxed fingers indicate relaxation, while curled fingers suggest discomfort, stress, or disagreement.

Genital Protection. Men exhibit the "Fig Leaf" gesture, while women perform the "Single-Arm Wrap" when feeling vulnerable, threatened, or insecure. These behaviors involve retracting the hands toward the genitals or crossing an arm across the lower abdomen.

Feet Honesty. The direction feet are pointed can indicate interest, focus, or a desire to leave the conversation. Feet pointing toward an exit may suggest a desire to disengage.

8. Elicitation Unlocks Information Without Direct Questioning

The more sensitive the information you need, the fewer questions you should ask.

Elicitation Techniques. Elicitation is the art of obtaining information without asking many questions. It involves using subtle statements and conversational techniques to encourage people to voluntarily share information.

The Hourglass Method. This method involves starting with general topics, narrowing down to sensitive information, and then widening the conversation back to general topics. This helps to minimize the memory of giving up sensitive information.

Human Factors. Elicitation works because of our need to be recognized, our tendency to correct the record, our desire to be heard, and our willingness to offer advice. By tapping into these human traits, you can create an environment where people feel comfortable sharing information.

9. Human Needs Drive Behavior and Expose Hidden Fears

Those are the laws of behavior for 6MX. There are five laws, but I am saving the fifth law until we unearth a few more techniques of people reading. The fifth law sounds a bit unusual until you’ve been exposed to something called The Human Needs Map, which explains it.

The Human Needs Map. This tool identifies the social needs that drive human behavior, revealing hidden fears and insecurities. The primary needs are significance, approval, and acceptance, while the secondary needs are intelligence, pity, and strength.

Identifying Needs. By listening to people's language and observing their behavior, you can identify their dominant needs. This knowledge allows you to tailor your communication to resonate with their desires and alleviate their fears.

Hidden Fears. Each need is associated with a specific set of fears. For example, people with a need for significance fear abandonment and social ridicule, while those with a need for approval fear dismissal and contempt.

10. Decision-Making Styles Shape Choices and Actions

When we encourage people to make decisions, we are making them ‘cut off’ the option to do anything else. The more you see in behavior, the better positioned you will be to make this happen. To help others ‘cut off’ from all other choices.

The Decision Map. This tool reveals how people make decisions, from buying a car to choosing a partner. The six decision styles are deviance, novelty, social, conformity, investment, and necessity.

Identifying Decision Styles. By observing people's behavior and listening to their language, you can identify their dominant decision style. This knowledge allows you to tailor your communication to align with their decision-making process.

Tailoring Communication. Understanding someone's decision style allows you to frame your message in a way that resonates with their values and priorities. For example, if you're selling to someone with a deviance decision style, you would emphasize the unique and unconventional aspects of your product.

11. Sensory Preferences Influence Communication

When we speak, we communicate using words that describe sensory experiences. All of us do this. We may speak mostly in visual, audio, or kinesthetic terms. When we speak with someone, they will quickly reveal their sensory preference through their language.

Sensory Communication. People tend to communicate using words that describe sensory experiences, revealing their preferred learning style. The three main sensory preferences are visual, auditory, and kinesthetic.

Identifying Preferences. By listening to people's language, you can identify their sensory preference. Visual people use words like "see" and "look," auditory people use words like "hear" and "listen," and kinesthetic people use words like "feel" and "touch."

Adapting Communication. Once you've identified someone's sensory preference, you can adapt your language to better resonate with them. This involves using words and phrases that appeal to their preferred sensory modality.

12. Linguistic Patterns Expose Thought Processes

The more sensitive the information you need, the fewer questions you should ask.

Pronoun Identification. People tend to use pronouns that reflect their focus and priorities. Self-pronoun users focus on themselves, team-pronoun users focus on groups, and others-pronoun users focus on people outside their groups.

Adjective Usage. The adjectives people use to describe things can reveal their values and priorities. By identifying positive and negative adjectives, you can gain insight into what they like and dislike.

Linguistic Harvesting. By combining pronoun identification, sensory preference identification, and adjective analysis, you can gain a deeper understanding of someone's thought processes and tailor your communication to be more persuasive.

Last updated: February 17, 2025