Uh-oh

1. "Uh-oh" is a Philosophy for Navigating Life's Bumps

“Uh-oh” is more than a momentary reaction to small problems. “Uh-oh” is an attitude—a perspective on the universe.

Expect the unexpected. The sound "uh-oh" is one of the first we learn, signifying a minor setback that we have the resources to handle. It's a shorthand for recognizing difficulty without escalating it to a full-blown crisis, distinguishing between a temporary stumble and a true emergency. This perspective acknowledges that life is inherently unpredictable and that surprises are a dimension of vitality.

An attitude of resilience. Embracing "uh-oh" means accepting that things won't always go according to plan. It encompasses phrases like "Here we go again," "Now what?," and "So much for plan A." It's a philosophy that suggests most difficulties are manageable, encouraging us to hang on, know that tomorrow is another day, and accept that some things just can't be undone.

Part of the human equation. The author proposes a formula for existence: "uh-huh" + "oh-wow" + "uh-oh" + "oh, God" = "ah-hah!". This suggests that acknowledging the inevitable bumps ("uh-oh") is a necessary component of understanding and appreciating the full spectrum of life's experiences, leading to moments of profound realization ("ah-hah!").

2. Find Wonder and Meaning in the Mundane

On a very local scale, a refrigerator is the center of the universe.

The ordinary is extraordinary. We often overlook the wonder hidden in plain sight, like the hum of a refrigerator or the collection of items on its door. The refrigerator door serves as a chronicle of household life, an art gallery, and a summary of current events not found elsewhere. It reminds us that holiness can be found in the seemingly mundane.

Harmony in the everyday. The author discovers his head resonates in B-flat, the same key as his refrigerator and many common appliances. This playful observation suggests a hidden harmony in the everyday world, making even the most ordinary sounds feel like a personal connection to the environment. It highlights how our personal experiences can imbue the commonplace with significance.

Celebration of the simple. From meatloaf to jelly beans, the book celebrates the cosmic significance of small things. It encourages readers to seek epiphanies in domestic events and find joy in simple pleasures. This perspective transforms the commonplace into the transcendent, urging us to appreciate the small miracles that make up our lives.

3. Leftovers and Memories Nourish the Soul

These precious things—these leftovers from living on—remain to serve as survival rations for the heart and soul.

More than just food. Leftovers, especially Thanksgiving leftovers or cold meatloaf, are elevated beyond mere sustenance to become profound experiences. Eating them late at night, alone in the kitchen, becomes a private ritual, a communion with the spirits of past feasts and a reminder of life's goodness. It's a matter of mental health, providing comfort and grounding.

Memories as sustenance. In a less visible form, leftovers are our memories, stored in the refrigerator of the mind and the cupboard of the heart. These memories serve as essential survival rations for the heart and soul. They remind us of past happiness, love, and moments of grace, providing strength and perspective.

A fellowship of the fridge. The solitary act of seeking comfort in the refrigerator late at night connects the author to others doing the same. This shared, unspoken experience creates a sense of belonging to a secret society, the Fellowship of the Fridge. It suggests that even in our most private moments of hunger or contemplation, we are not truly alone.

4. Learn the Difference Between Problems and Inconveniences

Fulchum, you think you know everything, but you don’t know the difference between an inconvenience and a problem.

The Wollman Test. A survivor of Auschwitz, Sigmund Wollman, taught the author a crucial lesson: distinguish between a true problem and a mere inconvenience. A broken neck, starvation, or a house fire are problems. Everything else is likely an inconvenience. Life is inherently lumpy, and learning this distinction is vital for living longer and annoying others less.

Life is lumpy. This simple phrase encapsulates the reality that life is full of minor difficulties and frustrations. Not every lump is the same; a lump in the oatmeal is not the same as a lump in a breast. Recognizing the scale of difficulty helps manage anger and stress, preventing overreactions to minor setbacks.

Perspective is key. The ability to separate major issues from minor annoyances is a test of reality. It requires perspective and self-awareness. By applying the Wollman Test, one can navigate life's challenges with greater calm and effectiveness, avoiding unnecessary drama and focusing energy on what truly matters.

5. Active Participation and Giving Make Fairy Tales Real

The world as it is needs those who will love it enough to change it, with what they have, where they are.

Be the change. The author prefers versions of the Cinderella story where the heroine is active and takes initiative, rather than passively waiting to be rescued. This reflects a belief that even God helps those who help themselves. True transformation comes from within and through action, not just wishing for luck.

Compagination in action. The story of the waitress helping winos become creative panhandlers illustrates "compagination"—compassion mixed with imagination. She didn't solve all their problems but empowered them by touching their self-respect and offering options. This act of imaginative giving is presented as the work of a true fairy godmother, making real-world change possible.

Show up and give. Whether it's volunteering for the Salvation Army kettle duty or planting daffodil bulbs, active participation is essential. It's not enough to send a check or think hopeful thoughts from a distance. Being present, engaging with human need, and contributing what you have, where you are, is the way to make a difference and keep idealism alive.

6. Love is About Connection, Not Possession

To love something and to possess it are not the same thing.

The space between. The author's observation of his grandchild trying to catch pigeons highlights the idea that connection and pursuit are often more important than possession. The child's joy is in the reaching, not the catching, illustrating that a respectful distance can be essential in relationships, acknowledging the other's independent self.

Unexpected connections. Love and connection can appear in surprising places and forms, like a brief, imagined love affair with a lady truck driver or a bond formed with a dock neighbor's dog. These moments, however fleeting or unconventional, are memorable and valuable. They remind us that the heart can be ambushed by connection in unexpected ways.

Commitment and acceptance. Long-term love, like marriage, is depicted as a process of continuous self-healing and acceptance of imperfections. The ritual of wrapping a house in string, tangles and all, symbolizes the commitment to navigate difficulties together. The author's formula for marriage emphasizes deep friendship, comfort, and being truly at home with one another.

7. Embrace Life's Messiness and Unexpected Humor

Thank God for these real-life accidents that keep us from the boredom of perfection.

Life's unplanned moments. From hiccups at a wedding or funeral to a briefcase sliding off a car roof, life is full of unpredictable, often hilarious, accidents. These moments, while potentially embarrassing or frustrating, break the monotony of routine and reveal the shared human experience of navigating chaos. They are a source of vitality and connection.

Finding humor in chaos. The Great Egg Attack story, while detailing childhood mischief and neighborhood drama, is recounted with an eye for the absurd and humorous. It shows how even frustrating events can become funny in retrospect, especially when viewed through the lens of shared human foibles and the predictable reactions of parents and children.

The value of imperfection. The author suggests that these messy, imperfect moments are gifts that save us from the boredom of perfection. They provide stories, laughter, and a reminder that life rarely follows a script. Embracing the ludicrous turns life can take allows for greater resilience and appreciation for the human comedy.

8. Simple Rituals Create Holy Ground

Wherever they happen, that place becomes holy ground.

Sacred spaces are everywhere. Holy ground isn't limited to traditional pilgrimage sites; it can be found in unexpected places like a grocery store aisle in Pocatello, Idaho. Moments of profound insight or connection with the universe can happen anywhere, transforming an ordinary location into a personal sacred space.

Rituals of meaning. Simple, personal rituals, like turning the great wheel at a Buddhist temple or planting daffodil bulbs on Rosh Hashanah, help us connect with elemental needs and concerns. They are finite gestures towards infinite questions, providing moments of reflection, hope, and active participation in shaping the future.

Finding the way in. The sign "PLEASE NOTE—THE ONLY WAY OUT IS IN" at a broken automatic door becomes a metaphor for navigating life's challenges. It suggests that external exits often require turning inward to find internal resources. These moments of insight, whether in a library, a grocery store, or a dark corridor, are common and vital for personal growth and understanding.

9. Shed Burdens and Live Fully, Scars and All

I think he’s sane and onto something big.

Lighten the load. The author's realization that he was lost in the "underbrush of busyness" and carrying too much "stuff" leads to a desire to lighten his load, both literally and figuratively. This is symbolized by wearing a propeller beanie to work and considering leaving belongings in a storage unit. Shedding unnecessary burdens allows for greater freedom and presence.

Embrace imperfections and keep growing. Like the old juniper tree twisted by wind and scarred by fire, life leaves its marks. The goal is not to avoid damage but to have the capacity for self-healing and to keep growing despite the scars. This applies to relationships, personal failures, and the accumulation of life's experiences.

Finding space and solitude. The idea of turning a storage unit into a personal "ashram and one-man tavern" represents a desire for a space free from the demands and clutter of modern life. It's about finding solitude and simplicity amidst abundance, suggesting that true wealth might lie in needing less and creating personal sanctuaries.

10. Time is Relative; Focus on What Truly Matters

“Sure does,” replies the farmer. “But what’s time to a pig?”

Beyond the clock. The story of Mean Gene the Time Machine highlights the human obsession with keeping time, contrasting it with a more intuitive, less rigid relationship with temporality. The author's watch without hands serves as a memento mori, a reminder that time is passing, but doesn't dictate the present moment.

Time is a human construct. The farmer's response about feeding a pig suggests that our frantic relationship with time is often self-imposed. What seems like a waste of time from a human perspective is irrelevant to a creature living fully in the present moment. It challenges the notion that every minute must be optimized for productivity.

Focus on presence. Whether wearing a watch without hands or a compass, the author seeks ways to shift focus from rigid schedules to presence and direction. Being "not lost" is more important than knowing the exact time. This perspective encourages living more intentionally in the "Now," appreciating the journey rather than just rushing towards a destination.

11. Belief is Personal, But Thirst for Life is Universal

What we have in common is thirst. Thirst!

Metaphors for the divine. The author's childhood belief in "Howard" as God, based on a misheard prayer, illustrates how personal metaphors shape our understanding of the ultimate. All human images of the divine are metaphors, and while they vary greatly across cultures and religions, the underlying human need for connection to something larger remains constant.

Beyond names and containers. The hydrology professor's analogy of water and thirst suggests that arguing over the names of God or the proper rituals is like arguing over the name of water or the cup it's drunk from. The essential reality is the water itself, and the universal human experience is the thirst for the water of Life.

Shared human need. Despite diverse beliefs and practices, humanity shares a fundamental thirst for meaning, connection, and understanding. This shared need transcends religious dogma and cultural differences. Recognizing this common thirst can foster empathy and peace, reminding us that we are all momentary waves in the same great ocean.

Last updated: May 12, 2025