What Matters Most

1. Embrace Fear and Ambiguity to Live a Fuller Life

"Fear is the enemy—most of all, fear of largeness."

Fear limits us. It prevents us from living fully and authentically. By recognizing fear as our primary obstacle, we can begin to overcome it. This involves acknowledging our fears, understanding their origins, and consciously choosing to act despite them.

Ambiguity is inevitable. Life is inherently uncertain and complex. Embracing ambiguity allows us to:

• Be more open to new experiences and perspectives
• Develop greater resilience and adaptability
• Cultivate deeper wisdom and understanding

By learning to tolerate and even appreciate ambiguity, we can live more richly and engage more fully with the mysteries of existence.

2. Nourish Your Soul and Respect the Power of Eros

"Eros is the life force—desire that wishes most to connect, to build, to combine, to fuse, to generate with the other."

Soul nourishment is essential. In our materially abundant yet spiritually impoverished world, we must actively seek ways to feed our souls. This involves:

• Cultivating meaningful relationships
• Engaging in creative pursuits
• Connecting with nature
• Exploring spiritual practices
• Reflecting on life's deeper questions

Eros is a powerful force. It goes beyond mere sexuality to encompass the vital energy that drives us to create, connect, and grow. Respecting and channeling this force involves:

• Acknowledging its presence in various aspects of life
• Recognizing its potential for both creation and destruction
• Integrating it consciously into our personal and creative endeavors

3. Step into Largeness and Risk Growth Over Security

"Jung's homey proverb that most of the time, 'we walk in shoes too small for us,' reminds us that the necessity of adaptation to the voices around us, the demands of our environment, require that we mostly live through adaptive psychologies rather than being guided by an instinctually driven center that wishes embodiment through us into the world."

Embrace your potential. Many of us live constrained lives, limited by fear, societal expectations, or past traumas. Stepping into largeness means:

• Recognizing our true capabilities and desires
• Challenging self-imposed limitations
• Pursuing ambitious goals and dreams

Growth requires risk. Choosing growth over security involves:

• Leaving comfort zones
• Embracing uncertainty
• Facing fears head-on
• Learning from failures and setbacks

By prioritizing personal growth and development over the illusion of security, we can lead more fulfilling and authentic lives.

4. Live Verbs, Not Nouns: Embrace Life's Dynamism

"All of life is a grand, blooming ambiguity. The more we know about it, the more we realize we do not know."

Life is process, not stasis. Viewing life as a series of verbs rather than nouns helps us:

• Embrace change and impermanence
• Focus on actions and experiences rather than fixed identities
• Remain open to new possibilities and perspectives

Dynamism is inherent in existence. By recognizing and aligning with life's dynamic nature, we can:

• Adapt more easily to changing circumstances
• Find flow and momentum in our pursuits
• Cultivate a sense of aliveness and engagement

Embracing life's dynamism allows us to move through the world with greater flexibility, creativity, and resilience.

5. Find and Follow Your Path of Creativity and Passion

"For Agee, wonder presents itself through the question 'Who am I?' He is his mother's son, his father's orphan, but the question abides, for we all know we are more than our relationships, our roles, our functions—but what are we, then?"

Discover your unique path. Each person has a distinct creative potential and set of passions. Finding and following this path involves:

• Self-reflection and introspection
• Experimenting with various interests and pursuits
• Paying attention to what energizes and inspires you
• Trusting your intuition and inner guidance

Embrace "foolish" passions. Often, our truest passions may seem foolish or impractical to others. Embracing these can lead to:

• Greater personal fulfillment
• Unexpected opportunities and discoveries
• A deeper sense of authenticity and purpose

By honoring our creative impulses and following our genuine passions, we can live more meaningful and satisfying lives.

6. Write Your Own Story and Engage Life's Spiritual Crises

"Either way we are called to die. Only through this death can our natural creativity enact its developmental plan."

Authorship of life. Taking responsibility for writing our own story involves:

• Recognizing and challenging inherited narratives
• Making conscious choices aligned with our values
• Reframing past experiences in empowering ways
• Actively shaping our future direction

Spiritual crises as opportunities. Engaging with life's spiritual crises can lead to:

• Deeper self-understanding
• Renewed sense of purpose
• Personal transformation and growth
• Enhanced resilience and wisdom

By viewing spiritual crises as invitations to growth rather than obstacles to avoid, we can use these challenging experiences as catalysts for positive change and self-discovery.

7. Fight Fate While Loving It: Amor Fati

"Loving one's Fate means that we live as fully as we can the life to which the gods have summoned us."

Embrace the paradox. Amor fati involves both accepting our circumstances and actively shaping our lives. This dual approach helps us:

• Find meaning in difficult situations
• Take responsibility for our choices and actions
• Cultivate resilience and adaptability

Balance acceptance and striving. Practical ways to embody amor fati include:

• Acknowledging limitations while exploring possibilities
• Finding opportunities for growth within constraints
• Cultivating gratitude for life's challenges and gifts
• Focusing on what we can control while accepting what we cannot

By loving our fate while still actively engaging with life, we can find a balance between acceptance and personal agency.

8. Live Fully in the Shadow of Mortality

"An aroused awareness of mortality is not the same as fear of mortality. Daily we are summoned to be mindful of mortality in order not to tumble into triviality, or be unconsciously governed by fear of that which is our most natural fact."

Embrace mortality as motivation. Awareness of our finite existence can:

• Sharpen our focus on what truly matters
• Inspire us to live more fully and authentically
• Encourage us to pursue meaningful goals and relationships

Transcend fear of death. By facing our mortality, we can:

• Cultivate a deeper appreciation for life
• Live more presently and intentionally
• Find meaning beyond our individual existence

Mindfulness of mortality, when approached with courage and wisdom, can lead to a richer, more purposeful life rather than paralysis or despair.

9. Accept That Your Journey Is Your Home

"One never reaches home. But where paths that have an affinity for each other intersect, the whole world looks like home for a time."

Home is not a destination. Recognizing that our journey is our true home allows us to:

• Find belonging in the process of growth and exploration
• Embrace change and impermanence
• Cultivate a sense of home within ourselves

Create meaning through the journey. Practical ways to embrace this perspective include:

• Focusing on personal growth and self-discovery
• Cultivating meaningful relationships and experiences along the way
• Finding purpose in the ongoing process of life rather than fixed outcomes
• Embracing both the joys and challenges of the journey as integral to our "home"

By accepting that our journey is our home, we can find deeper fulfillment and meaning in the ongoing process of life, rather than constantly seeking an elusive destination.

Last updated: October 21, 2024