Your Future Self Will Thank You

1. Self-Control: The Foundation for Freedom and Flourishing

“Having first laid down self-control as a foundation for the soul, they build the other virtues on it.”

Essential Virtue. Self-control isn't just another good character trait; it's the bedrock upon which other virtues are built. Without it, faithfulness, generosity, kindness, and even basic altruism become difficult, if not impossible, to achieve. It's the ability to suspend immediate desires for a greater good.

Biblical Imperative. The Bible emphasizes self-control as a path to freedom, not restriction. It's presented as a fruit of the Spirit, a product of a life rooted in divine reality. Scripture is filled with commands to resist evil, flee lust, and abstain from sin, all requiring self-control.

Societal Impact. A lack of self-control is at the root of many societal ills. The ability to delay gratification and resist negative impulses is linked to better relationships, higher incomes, and greater happiness. It's a virtue that leads to both personal and communal flourishing.

2. Purpose: The Compass and Engine of Self-Control

“They didn’t keep the purpose of their lives front and center as they decided how to spend their time, talents, and energy.”

Beyond Self-Improvement. Self-control shouldn't be pursued for selfish reasons. It's not about becoming successful or impressive, but about aligning with God's purposes. The ultimate goal is to love God and love others, and self-control is a tool to achieve that.

Disordered Loves. Sin often stems from "disordered loves," where we prioritize things above God and others. Biblical self-control is about keeping our loves in the right order, ensuring that God is our highest devotion. This reordering enables us to love others selflessly.

Sanctified Goals. Imbuing goals with spiritual significance energizes our efforts. Seeing our endeavors as callings from God, whether it's parenting, working, or serving, provides a powerful motivation to persevere and exercise self-control. Purpose acts as both a steering wheel and an engine, guiding and propelling us forward.

3. Recognizing the Enemies Within and Without

“I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing.”

The Fallen Nature. The Bible teaches that we have an inborn tendency to choose sin and selfishness over holiness. This "crooked timber" tradition acknowledges our flaws and the need to struggle against our weaknesses. Recognizing this reality is the first step to leading a self-controlled life.

The Devil's Deceptions. In addition to our internal struggles, we face an external enemy, the devil, who seeks to devour us. He tempts us with shortcuts, offering immediate gratification at the expense of long-term fulfillment. Resisting him requires turning to God and obeying His commandments.

The Importance of Vigilance. Self-control demands clear-eyed vigilance to spot sin and avoid it. We must be sober and restrained, balanced and mastered, guarding against both sins of commission and sins of omission. It's a constant battle against the forces of evil, both within and without.

4. Willpower: A Muscle to Be Grown and Guarded

“The best way to think of willpower is not as some shapeless behavioral trait but as a sort of psychic muscle, one that can atrophy or grow stronger depending on how it’s used.”

Finite Resource. Willpower is the emotional energy needed to withstand temptation, but it's a limited resource that can be depleted. Stress, lack of sleep, and conflict can all drain our willpower reserves, making us more vulnerable to temptation.

State vs. Trait. State self-control varies from moment to moment, while trait self-control varies from person to person. Some people naturally have more willpower than others, but everyone can improve their self-control through consistent effort.

Growth and Conservation. Willpower can be strengthened through resistance, like a muscle. Doing hard things, like reading challenging books or exercising, builds willpower. It's also important to conserve willpower by avoiding unnecessary stressors and distractions.

5. Habits: Automating the Path to Virtue

“Virtue is what happens when wise and courageous choices become second nature.”

Unconscious Patterns. Habits are behaviors that start as choices and become nearly unconscious patterns. They determine a significant portion of our actions each day, making self-control almost automatic.

The Habit Loop. Every habit has three parts: a cue (a trigger), a routine (the behavior), and a reward (the payoff). By understanding this loop, we can identify and modify our habits, replacing destructive routines with virtuous ones.

Beyond Information. Knowledge alone isn't enough to change behavior. We need to build righteous patterns into our lives through habits. These habits, like regular prayer, Bible reading, and acts of service, become vehicles for transformation.

6. Strategies for Building and Breaking Habits

“The orientation of the heart happens from the bottom up, through the formation of our habits of desire. Learning to love (God) takes practice.”

The Power of Replacement. Bad habits are best overcome by replacing them with good ones. This involves keeping the old cue and delivering the old reward, but inserting a new, healthier routine.

Start Small and Be Consistent. New habits should be introduced gradually, starting with small, manageable actions. Consistency is key, performing the new behavior at the same time and in the same place each day.

Choice Architecture. Design your environment to make good choices easier and bad choices harder. This involves limiting options and "nudging" yourself toward virtuous behavior.

7. Grace: Empowering, Not Nullifying, Self-Control

“If we know that the aim of the Holy Spirit is to lead man to the place of self-control, we shall not fall into passivity but shall make good progress in spiritual life. ‘The fruit of the Spirit is self-control.’”

Justification vs. Sanctification. Justification is being made right before God through grace, while sanctification is the lifelong process of becoming more like Jesus. We must avoid conflating these categories, recognizing that sanctification requires effort.

Divine Empowerment. True spiritual growth doesn't come apart from God's empowerment. We can't transform ourselves through sheer willpower alone. We need the Holy Spirit to guide and strengthen us.

Grace and Effort. Grace doesn't nullify the need for effort; it empowers it. We strive for holiness out of gratitude and joy, knowing that God is working within us to will and to act according to His good purpose.

8. Navigating the Digital Minefield: Self-Control in the Modern Age

“We are a people on the verge of amusing ourselves to death.”

Amplified Temptations. The internet hasn't created new temptations, but it has amplified existing ones, making sin more accessible and convenient. Online porn, social media, and endless entertainment options all pose a threat to our self-control.

Distraction and the Soul. Constant distractions from technology can erode our ability to concentrate and engage in spiritual practices. It's crucial to protect our minds from the barrage of digital stimuli.

Strategies for Digital Discipline:

• Draw bright lines: Set clear boundaries for technology use
• Structure your time: Prioritize Scripture reading and prayer
• Make your Sabbath tech-free: Dedicate a day to rest and disconnect

9. Lessons from Addicts: The Hard Road to Recovery

“The devil always gives you the best stuff up front.”

Common Ground. We have more in common with addicts than we might think. All sin has an addictive quality, and we all have the potential to lose control.

Admitting Powerlessness. The first step to recovery is admitting our powerlessness over our addictions. This humility opens the door to divine assistance and the support of others.

The Importance of Structure and Community. Recovery programs provide a structured environment and a supportive community to help addicts break free from their dependencies. These elements are also crucial for our own spiritual growth.

10. The Power of Community and Divine Dependence

“The Holy Spirit gives self-control when we alter our old unproductive and less satisfying routines into new productive and more satisfying routines.”

Community is Key. Addicts need community to stay sober, and we need community to grow in self-control. Surrounding ourselves with supportive and encouraging people helps us resist temptation and pursue righteousness.

Divine Dependence. Ultimately, self-control isn't about self-reliance; it's about divine dependence. We need to surrender to God and rely on His power to overcome our weaknesses and live a holy life.

The More Satisfying Way. The way of Jesus is more satisfying than the old way of sin and self-indulgence. By choosing His path, we can experience true freedom and flourishing, living lives that bless others and glorify God.

Last updated: March 21, 2025