Beyond Revenge

1. Revenge and Forgiveness are Innate Human Instincts.

Brandon Biggs and Bud Welch are regular human beings just like the rest of us.

Challenging assumptions. Many believe revenge is abnormal, a "disease" that infects individuals, while forgiveness is a "cure" or a "thin veneer of civility." This "disease model" of revenge, perpetuated by Western thought, religion, and the mental health profession, suggests that vengeful people are defective or morally misshapen. However, this book argues against this view, asserting that both the desire for revenge and the capacity for forgiveness are normal, built-in features of human nature, present in every neurologically intact individual.

Evolutionary perspective. The author posits that both revenge and forgiveness are authentic, standard-issue traits, deeply embedded in our biological heritage. They are not merely cultural products but rather outcomes of billions of years of biological evolution, managed by our genetic makeup. This perspective challenges the "Standard Social Science Model," which often attributes all human psychological characteristics solely to external forces like culture and upbringing.

Beyond good and evil. Just as chimpanzees exhibit both "good-natured" and "demonic" behaviors, humans possess a dual nature. The capacity for forgiveness is as authentic and biologically grounded as our propensity for revenge. Understanding this inherent duality is crucial for moving beyond simplistic moral judgments and for developing effective strategies to foster forgiveness and mitigate destructive vengeance in the world.

2. Revenge, Though Destructive, Served Vital Evolutionary Functions.

Today, we may view revenge as a problem (and, as we’ll see in the next chapter, it is), but through the lens of evolution, it’s also an age-old solution.

Counting the costs. Revenge is a powerful motivator of human destructiveness, contributing to aggression, murder, and even international conflict. Examples like Marvin Heemeyer's "killdozer" rampage or Vitaly Kaloyev's murder of an air traffic controller illustrate how deeply personal grievances can escalate into extreme violence. Studies show that a significant percentage of homicides, particularly in disadvantaged neighborhoods or school shootings, are motivated by revenge, highlighting its pervasive and often tragic impact.

Adaptive functions. From an evolutionary standpoint, the readiness to seek revenge served crucial functions for ancestral humans, helping them solve social problems that threatened their survival and reproductive success. These functions include:

• Deterring repeat aggression: Making it unprofitable for an aggressor to harm an individual a second time.
• Warning would-be harmdoers: Establishing a reputation that discourages others from taking advantage in the first place.
• Coercing cooperation: Punishing "free riders" who benefit from group efforts without contributing, thereby maintaining social cohesion.

Beyond human nature. This propensity for revenge is not unique to humans; it is observed across the animal kingdom, from rhesus macaques to fish, where it serves similar deterrent and cooperative enforcement roles. This widespread presence suggests that revenge is a deeply ingrained, evolutionarily stable strategy, not merely a human flaw.

3. The Desire for Revenge is a Universal Response to Perceived Dishonor.

Humans desire revenge when they perceive that they’ve been harmed significantly and intentionally by another person.

Thin slice of experience. Revenge is not a random outburst but a reliable response to a specific type of environmental input: a significant and intentional harm that violates one's sense of honor. The more severe and intentional the injury, the more intense the desire for vengeance. This "thin slice" principle is akin to how our ears are specifically tuned to certain sound frequencies, suggesting a specialized, evolved mechanism.

Cross-cultural universality. Evidence strongly supports revenge as a human universal. Studies using the Human Relations Area Files (HRAF) Probability Sample found that:

• 95% of cultures showed evidence of "blood revenge" following homicide.
• 100% of cultures demonstrated "costly punishment," where individuals incur personal costs to punish excessively greedy behavior.
  This suggests that the inclination for vengeance is experienced by people in virtually all cultures, not just a select few.

Animal parallels. Revenge is not exclusive to humans. It's observed in various species, including chimpanzees, macaques, cowbirds, and even fish. These animals exhibit retaliatory behaviors to deter aggression or enforce cooperation, such as:

• Chimpanzees aiding opponents of those who previously intervened against them.
• Japanese macaques attacking the kin of their aggressors in plain sight.
• Guppies punishing partners who shirk predator inspection duties.
  These examples underscore that the underlying logic of revenge as a problem-solving strategy is widespread in the natural world.

4. Forgiveness Evolved to Preserve Valuable Relationships and Foster Cooperation.

The capacity to forgive is every bit as authentic, every bit as intrinsic to human nature, and every bit as much a product of natural selection as is our penchant for revenge.

Inclusive fitness. Forgiveness, like revenge, is an evolved feature of human nature, primarily serving two adaptive functions. First, it helps humans get along with genetic relatives. Harsh retaliation against kin reduces the avenger's "inclusive fitness" because relatives share genes. A propensity to forgive blood relatives likely evolved to avoid self-defeating actions that would diminish one's own genetic legacy.

Cooperation with non-relatives. Second, forgiveness is crucial for encouraging cooperation among non-relatives, a cornerstone of human society. Game theory, particularly the "iterated prisoner's dilemma," demonstrates that strategies incorporating forgiveness, like "tit-for-tat" or "generous tit-for-tat," are evolutionarily stable. These strategies:

• Start by cooperating.
• Retaliate against defection.
• Forgive if the partner returns to cooperation.
  This willingness to forgive periodic defections is indispensable for creating "win-win" scenarios and sustaining long-term cooperative alliances, especially in "noisy" environments where mistakes are inevitable.

Beyond simple rules. More complex simulations, incorporating factors like geographical proximity ("neighbors") and social learning, suggest that evolution favors even more forgiving strategies for close friends and associates. The ability to forgive allows individuals to maintain a stable network of cooperation partners, which is more efficient than constantly seeking new ones.

5. The Brain's "Seeking System" Drives Both the Craving and Pleasure of Revenge.

When you’ve been injured by someone, the initial response is that familiar suite of negative emotions — anger, hurt, and the rest — but after those initial negative emotions give way, the seeking system calls for a fundamental change in course.

Revenge as desire. Neuroscience reveals that revenge is not primarily a product of rage but of desire, driven by the brain's "seeking system." This system generates enthusiasm and anticipation for rewards. When someone harms us, the initial anger and hurt can morph into a craving for revenge, akin to hunger, as the seeking system redirects us toward a search for pleasure.

Neural pathways of vengeance:

• Caudate nucleus activity: Highly active during the decision to punish, even when punishment incurs a personal cost. This area is also active when anticipating monetary rewards or pleasant tastes.
• Left prefrontal cortex activation: When planning revenge, the left prefrontal cortex, responsible for planning movement toward desired objects, becomes highly active. This suggests revenge is a goal-oriented pursuit of a desired outcome.
• Frustration and numbing: If revenge goals are thwarted, individuals experience frustration, sometimes leading to increased alcohol consumption to "anaesthetize" the blocked desire.

The pleasure of retribution. Accomplishing revenge is exhilarating. Observing an unfair player receive painful electric shocks activates the "nucleus accumbens," a central part of the brain's reward pathways, particularly in men. This pleasurable "jolt" reinforces the behavior, ensuring that individuals are motivated to seek the social advantages that come from returning harm for harm.

6. Forgiveness is Activated by Perceptions of Careworthiness, Value, and Safety.

The capacity to forgive, like the desire for revenge, is a standard-issue human social instinct.

Psychological foundations. The forgiveness instinct is activated by three key psychological conditions, which serve as cues for the brain to initiate the process of letting go of ill will and fostering positive motivations:

• Careworthiness: People are more likely to forgive transgressors whom they perceive as appropriate targets for kindness and compassion. This is often linked to empathy, genetic relatedness, or perceived helplessness. Empathy, in particular, reduces vengeful attitudes and promotes forgiveness by evoking distress in the observer rather than pleasure from the offender's suffering.
• Expected value: Forgiveness is more likely when individuals perceive their relationship with the transgressor as valuable, or potentially valuable, in the future. This aligns with the "valuable relationship" hypothesis, where maintaining beneficial social ties outweighs the costs of holding a grudge.
• Safety: People are more inclined to forgive transgressors whom they perceive as unwilling or unable to harm them again. This involves assessing the transgressor's intentions (intentional vs. unintentional harm), remorse, and ability to re-offend.

Anxiety as a motivator. Post-conflict anxiety plays a crucial role in motivating forgiveness and reconciliation in both humans and non-human primates. Aggression and conflict lead to stress and anxiety, which are unpleasant states. Forgiving or reconciling alleviates this anxiety, restoring a sense of peace and reducing uncertainty about the relationship's future. This mechanism ensures that individuals follow through on the evolutionary mandate to preserve valuable relationships.

7. Apologies, Self-Abasement, and Compensation are Universal Signals for Forgiveness.

Done correctly, apologies are extremely effective at discouraging revenge and encouraging forgiveness.

Forgiveness signals. To activate the forgiveness instinct, offenders can use specific signals that communicate careworthiness, value, and safety to their victims. These signals are culturally diverse but share core commonalities:

• Apologies: The most potent tool, apologies involve acknowledging the offense, taking responsibility, expressing remorse, offering explanations, and promising forbearance or reparations. Effective apologies restore the victim's honor, affirm shared moral values, reassure safety, and can even satisfy the victim's desire for the transgressor to suffer.
• Self-abasing displays and gestures: These non-verbal signals, such as blushing, bowing, crawling, or exposing vulnerable body parts, communicate humility, weakness, and submission. They restore the victim's social status and can evoke sympathy, making the offender more forgivable. The Montenegrin ritual of a murderer's son crawling in underwear with a rifle exemplifies this powerful signal.
• Compensation: Offering reparations for harm caused is a tried-and-true mechanism. Compensation undoes some damage, forces the transgressor to experience pain, and signals potential future value in the relationship. Even partial compensation, like the "solatia" payments made by the U.S. military in Afghanistan and Iraq, can significantly quell resentment and promote forgiveness.

Overcoming resistance. While these signals are effective, offenders often resist them due to fear of blame, status loss, or belief in their own righteousness. However, when these signals are genuinely offered, they can bridge the gap between words and actions, fostering forgiveness and reconciliation.

8. Strong States and Restorative Justice are Crucial for Controlling Revenge and Promoting Forgiveness.

Remove people’s legitimate ability to take revenge, and assure them that you’ll look out for their rights through less vengeful means, and life consequently becomes much safer for everybody.

Monopoly of force. Strong states play a critical role in controlling revenge by establishing a "monopoly of force." When the state effectively enforces laws, protects citizens, and punishes violators, individuals are more willing to relinquish the burden of self-protection and revenge. This leads to a significant reduction in revenge-motivated violence, as seen in the centuries-long decline of homicide rates in Western Europe.

Disrupted monopolies. Conversely, when a state's monopoly of force is disrupted, as in post-invasion Iraq, people revert to tribal identities and revenge-fueled sectarian violence. Similarly, the rise of organized crime in Europe, operating outside state control, leads to increased vengeance. These situations highlight that the absence of a strong, legitimate authority empowers the innate human desire for revenge.

Restorative justice. Beyond state control, the "restorative justice" movement offers a powerful framework for promoting forgiveness at the community level. Victim-offender conferences bring together affected parties to:

• Allow offenders to explain their actions, apologize, and offer reparations.
• Provide victims a chance to ask questions, understand the crime, and describe its impact.
  These conferences are highly effective, reducing victims' desire for revenge and increasing their likelihood of forgiveness by facilitating the exchange of crucial forgiveness signals.

9. Intergroup Forgiveness Requires Redefining Identities and Fostering Cooperation.

As man advances in civilization, and small tribes are united into larger communities, the simplest reason would tell each individual that he ought to extend his social instincts and sympathies to all the members of the same nation, though personally unknown to him.

Scaling forgiveness. The principles of forgiveness can be scaled from individuals to groups, communities, and nations. Leaders can offer apologies, express remorse, and provide compensation on behalf of their people to foster intergroup forgiveness. However, the challenge lies in overcoming innate "ingroup favoritism" and transforming perceptions of "enemies" into "friends."

Cooperation as a catalyst. Engaging hostile groups in activities where they must rely on each other to achieve mutually valued goals can undo intergroup hostility. The "Robbers Cave Study" demonstrated how superordinate goals can transform animosity between groups into cooperation and friendship. This process works through three social-psychological phenomena:

• Decategorization: Individuals stop thinking of others primarily in terms of their group membership, focusing instead on individual attributes. Cross-group friendships are a powerful tool for this.
• Recategorization: Groups recognize a more inclusive, superordinate identity that encompasses all members, shifting focus from differences to shared membership in a larger group.
• Mutual intergroup differentiation: Groups come to appreciate the unique strengths and assets of the other group, recognizing that mutual success can be achieved by capitalizing on both.

Seeds of Peace. Programs like "Seeds of Peace" exemplify this approach by bringing together teenagers from conflict regions to build lasting relationships and foster mutual respect, aiming to create future leaders who can advocate for forgiveness and reconciliation.

10. Religion is a Flexible Force, Capable of Inspiring Both Forgiveness and Righteous Revenge.

The same religions that can promote messages of nonviolent resistance, forgiveness of enemies, and brotherly love are also able to promote righteous retaliation, a thirst for the blood of one’s enemies, and the exaltation of revenge to a solemn religious duty.

Dual nature of faith. Religion has a complex and often contradictory relationship with forgiveness and revenge. While many religious traditions, like the Amish or Brandon Biggs's Christian faith, emphasize forgiveness and non-retaliation, religion can also be a powerful "vengeance engine." Historical examples, from the Crusades to modern Islamist rhetoric, demonstrate how religious texts and interpretations can justify extreme violence and hatred.

Adaptive flexibility. Evolutionary scientists suggest that successful religions, particularly mega-religions like Christianity and Islam, are "living systems" that adapt to social and ecological conditions. Their doctrines and traditions are flexible enough to be invoked to justify either forgiveness or revenge, depending on what best serves the group's "fitness" or survival at a given time.

• Forgiveness for growth: Early Christianity, for instance, used messages of forgiveness and acceptance to attract marginalized individuals, aiding its growth.
• Vengeance for survival: The "Book of Judges" study shows how religious texts, when perceived as divinely sanctioned, can significantly increase aggressive behavior, even among devout individuals.

The Waorani example. The Waorani people of Ecuador, once plagued by rampant blood feuds, adopted Christianity because its message of forgiveness offered a solution to their self-destructive cycles of revenge. The missionaries' non-retaliatory stance served as an "honest, costly signal" of their commitment to peace, making the new religion attractive and ultimately saving the Waorani culture from collapse.

11. Humanity's Context-Sensitivity, Culture, and Capacity for Cooperation Offer Hope for a More Forgiving Future.

Our status as “Man the knower” puts us in a position to become the most forgiving of species.

Homo ignoscens and Homo ultor. While humans are undeniably "Homo ultor" (man the avenger), driven by innate vengeful impulses, we are also "Homo ignoscens" (man the forgiver). Our capacity for forgiveness is innate, adaptive, and responsive to environmental and social cues. The key to a more forgiving future lies in leveraging our unique human characteristics:

• Context-sensitivity: Humans possess an unprecedented ability to adjust behavior to diverse environmental conditions. In safe, just, and cooperative environments, forgiveness naturally flourishes. By identifying and altering factors that sustain revenge, we can shift the balance towards forgiveness.
• Cultural creatures: Culture allows us to learn and transmit rules for behavior more quickly than genetic evolution. We can learn to forgive by observing others, through religious teachings, or through formal practices like restorative justice. While culture can perpetuate maladaptive behaviors (like honor cultures), it also enables the global spread of forgiveness-promoting ideas and practices.
• Cooperative champions: Cooperation is fundamental to the evolution of life itself, leading to increasing complexity. The history of life suggests that future human evolution will involve even greater cooperation, potentially leading to a lasting bond among nations. This requires resilient social systems that can manage conflict and self-interest, where forgiveness becomes an essential component for sustaining cooperation.

A hopeful vision. The "Olive Branch" on the Great Seal of the United States symbolizes the choice for peace and forgiveness, even after war. By understanding the evolutionary logic of both revenge and forgiveness, and by consciously shaping our social, cultural, and political environments, humanity can actively stack the deck in favor of forgiveness, moving towards a more cooperative and complex future.