I Don't Want To Grow Up

1. Embrace Childlike Awe and Never Grow Up

Our natural state was one of awe.

Born knowing everything. As babies, we experience the world with pure, unfiltered awe. Colors are vivid, sounds are overwhelming, and everything moves with sparkling energy. This state of wonder is our natural inheritance, a connection to the beauty and magic of existence. The challenge is to retain this childlike perspective as we navigate the complexities of adulthood.

Choosing love as life's purpose. This book is about choosing love as your life’s purpose. It’s about living—beyond all else—and spending your entire life in that childlike state of awe. It’s about never growing up. It's about prioritizing experience and living out the rest of your days in a continuous state of wonder, curiosity, and never-ending adventure.

Heaven on Earth. Heaven exists here and now, in the wild blue oceans, grandiose mountains, sparkling deserts, and dripping rainforests that surround us. By prioritizing experience and adventure, we can spend our lives in a continuous state of wonder, curiosity, and never-ending adventure.

2. Privilege of Freedom: Gratitude and Responsibility

We are all privileged.

Inherited wealth of freedom. Living in America today means inheriting a wealth of freedom and opportunity. We have access to cheap transportation, vast public lands, and countless possibilities for exploration and adventure. This privilege comes with a responsibility to use our freedom wisely and not take it for granted.

Gratitude through action. The question is, what are you going to do about it? How to show our gratitude? By wasting away our precious freedoms working a job we hate, all for the sake of raising children to do the same? Does this sound normal? Well, it should. It’s what millions of people do every day.

Freedom to choose. We have the freedom to roam about freely with little restriction or limitation aside from our own. Transportation is cheap. We have buses, trains, Uber and Lyft. You can walk, bike, hitchhike, or fly. We were born into the world of Airbnb, couch surfing, hostels, and 640 million acres of public land where you can camp—usually for free.

3. Question Everything and Redefine Success

Freaks change the world.

The world needs freaks. The world needs “crazy” people—now more than ever before. The ones on the fringes of society who don’t quite fit in. Who don’t necessarily subscribe to the Hollywood version of the American Dream. They are the dreamers—artists, musicians, adrenaline junkies, nomads, life seekers. Without them, the world would be one cold, stale, miserable place.

Rejecting conventional wisdom. The world needs freaks. Those who doubt conventional wisdom, question authority, and continually search for newer, better ways to live. These are the individuals who challenge the status quo, push boundaries, and create new possibilities for themselves and others.

Redefining success. If you want a safe, predictable life; if you’re pursuing an exciting career in a serious field; if you want to raise a family in a house with a big yard and two cars and work every day for 8 hours, 10 hours, 12 hours, or whatever the new standard is for a full-time job; if your idea of the American Dream is working in an office and coming home each night to eat, sleep, and repeat—then by all means, read no further. This book is not for you.

4. The Big Question: What Do You Want Your Life to Look Like?

What do you want your life to look like?

The stress of deciding. Most of us have absolutely no idea what we want to do with our lives. We never have and we never will. This bothers us terribly and on a profound level. We feel useless, disconnected, scattered, unfocused. If we could just make up our minds. About something, about anything! Then we could be happy. The fact is—you will never make up your mind. You will never know what you want to be when you grow up, for one obvious reason—there is simply too much in this big ole world to ever settle on one thing!

Focus on the life you want. When you start focusing on the life you want, rather than what you think will get you there, you’re on the right track. It all starts with waking up in the morning. Visualize your perfect day from morning to night. Where do you live? What are you wearing? What activities are you engaging in? How about a year from now? Five years from now? Ten? Use your imagination and write your story—as only you can write it. Adaptations can be made along the way. There are no rules. Everything is subject to change. It’s your journey.

Planning for your perfect life. Once you have your perfect life on paper, with as many details as possible, then—and only then—can you start making a plan. Most people go about this in the exact opposite way, making plans without ever asking themselves what they actually want.

5. Money is a Tool, Not the Goal

It’s not about the money.

Money's true value. We began to believe we could do anything. But it seemed Napoleon Hill got something wrong. Something big—MONEY. Why had we been making money the goal? Why would the goal ever be money? Money is worthless on its own. There are plenty of people with lots of money who are miserable. The goal cannot—must not!—be money. It must be a question. The most important question of all: What do you want your life to look like?

Lifestyle over income. We never wanted money. We wanted to backpack, ski, mountain bike, and kayak. To do that we needed time—okay, and a little bit of money. I’ve never understood the mentality of work hard now, then retire when you’re sixty-five. Sixty-five? What the hell am I going to do when I’m sixty-five? My body will never be in better shape than it is now.

Simplifying for freedom. We began simplifying our lives by eliminating debt and spending our money on travel and outdoor gear, rather than cars, home furnishings, and electronic gadgetry. With as much money as we can make, can it ever buy back youth?

6. Breaking the Rules: Redefining the Prescribed Life

Freedom is living life on your terms.

Rejecting societal norms. We are taught to believe there’s only one way to live. One set of rules to follow. Many define this as the “prescribed life.” It goes something like this: School, Job, House (debt), Family, Consumerism (more debt), Retirement, Death. Not growing up means breaking those rules and rejecting society’s unwritten laws about how we should live our lives. It’s about writing your own story. Sure, this can be scary, but for others, nothing is more terrifying than the alternative.

Prioritizing lifestyle. Not growing up means prioritizing lifestyle. Arranging work to fit your schedule, not the other way around. We are all busy. We all have obligations. When we prioritize our dreams and follow our hearts, we begin to move past the problems that keep us stuck and toward the life we want.

Resourcefulness and self-reliance. Not growing up is about resourcefulness and self-reliance. If books aren’t selling, I can drive, or work in sales, or repair bikes, or do something altogether different. Why should we ever stop trying new things? Life is an adventure. When you simplify, you can do just about anything. This is freedom in the truest sense of the word.

7. Focus Your Intention and Energize Your Dreams

We are what we focus on.

The power of focus. Many of us have minds that are constantly clouded with a thousand concerns, most of which we can do nothing about. If you pay attention to social media or watch the news, on any given day you’ll find an endless sea of things to worry about. I’m not saying you should turn your back on all the problems in the world, but if you’re not actively doing something to help these problems, what good is it to worry about them? Everybody has the power to change the world. Nobody has the power change everything. Try this and you’ll go insane!

Desire and unstoppable dreams. When dreams are charged with desire, they become unstoppable. Last spring, I injured my foot and my knee. With both hiking and mountain biking off the table, this could easily have turned into “the summer of no wilderness.” But rather than sulking in my misfortune, I merely transitioned to kayaking and paddleboarding—and spent the entire summer floating rivers and paddling the ocean. Not to mention writing this book. Nothing can keep me from wilderness because it’s that important. If this doesn’t send a crystal-clear message to the universe—I don’t know what does.

The universe gives what we think about. You see—we think the universe is so complex, but it’s actually quite simple. It gives us precisely what we think about. Humans are blessed with a wonderful thing called free will. Our destiny is up to us. We just need to decide. The way to let the universe know what we want is by focusing our intention. Animals do this naturally. A squirrel focuses on the nut, so it gets the nut. A bird focuses on the worm, so it gets the worm. You get the gist.

8. Infinite Intelligence: Tapping into the Universe's Organizing Force

You must have definite purpose.

The universe's intelligence. We may have differing opinions about religion, but I think we can all agree there exists a certain kind of intelligence that organizes the universe. The intelligence that allows blood to flow through our veins, bees to pollinate flowers, birds to fly south, salmon to spawn, whales to migrate, caterpillars to become butterflies, Earth to rotate, the moon to orbit, and the rest of nature to function perfectly of its own accord. For the sake of this discussion, let’s call it Infinite Intelligence. We might also call it God or the universe.

Accessing the organizing force. The key to living the life you want is tapping into this Infinite Intelligence. Each of us has access to this mysterious organizing force, but unless we know what we want, it cannot help us. Most people have absolutely no idea what they want, so the universe cannot help them.

Breadcrumbs from the universe. When you know what you want, the whole world changes. Life turns into a magical game of coincidence with clues around every corner. You go on just as before, but you’re aware of opportunities as they arise. Infinite Intelligence is on your side. Life throws you breadcrumbs. If you’re serious, you follow them. They lead you where you want to go. Always be on the lookout for breadcrumbs. This is Infinite Intelligence conspiring to get you what you want.

9. Love Comes First: Follow Your Heart and Instinct

Love must come first.

The heart's guidance. You exist so the universe can experience itself only as it can through you. Your uniqueness is proof of that. To fight this uniqueness is to deny the will of the cosmos. Infinite Intelligence works through the heart, the place where dreams come from. Do not mistake these messages as selfish whims or childish musings. They are from the divine.

Instinct and coincidence. It starts with a feeling in the gut. A hunch or a twitch. This is instinct kicking in. We still have our instincts, just like the rest of nature. We’ve just forgotten how to use them. Follow your instincts, and it’s almost scary how well they still work. We never lost them, just neglected them. When instinct begins to steer your ship, it may seem insignificant at first. Just pay attention to coincidence—this is instinct communicating directly with Infinite Intelligence. When you follow coincidence, exciting things begin to happen. Your vibration increases, leading to more and more coincidence—the pathway to your dreams.

Resist conformity. The whole point is: There’s more than one way to live. More than two ways. There are infinite possibilities here on God’s green Earth. Why then, would anyone willingly conform to the beliefs of a particular group? Live your own life, form your own opinions, and when all else fails—THINK FOR YOURSELF!

10. Learning to Die: Embrace the Unknown and Live Fully

I’d rather die while I’m living than live while I’m dead.

Dying before you die. In Zen teachings, the whole premise is to die before you die. Meaning that when we let go of attachment to the physical world, we relinquish our primordial fears of death. For many, this happens at the end of our days. When everything has been stripped away—we finally find peace. But if we learn to embrace the unknown, rather than fear it, we get to die before we die—and live our lives fully.

The risk of not taking risks. The way I see it, the only risk we can take is not taking risks. So sign up for that river trip, get lost in Paraguay, miss that flight in Barbados, board that train to who knows where. Adventures are adventures—no matter how big or small. It could simply be a cooking class, or taking salsa lessons, or learning Taekwondo. Anything outside your comfort zone. Small adventures lead to bigger ones. They guide you along the pathway of your dreams.

Surrender to the journey. Now that you’ve thrown yourself into a life of adventure, it’s time to surrender and hand the job over to Infinite Intelligence. When we surrender, we let go of any preconceived notions of how we think things should play out. We let nature take the reins. This is how miracles happen. It’s when we look back ten years from now and say, “What a wild ride! I could not have invented such a story!”

Last updated: April 3, 2025