Nice is Just a Place in France

1. Reject Niceness, Embrace Betchiness

a betch gets what she wants.

Niceness is boring. The core philosophy is that being traditionally "nice" leads to mediocrity, boredom, and being taken advantage of. Nicegirls follow rules, lack depth, and are easily overlooked. The goal is not to be a cruel "bitch," but a self-interested, confident "betch" who prioritizes her own needs and desires.

Winning is the goal. Betchiness is an attitude and lifestyle focused on succeeding in life – relationships, career, social standing – by getting what you want. It's about being decisive, knowing your value, and achieving optimal results with minimal effort. This contrasts with the "nicegirl" who accommodates others and rarely achieves her full potential.

Be unapproachable and hot. A betch is the girl who effortlessly gets what she wants, is always put-together, and commands attention. While she may seem unapproachable, those close to her know she can be a "huge bitch," embodying strength, confidence, and not taking shit from anyone. This persona is key to getting ahead.

2. Prioritize Self-Interest and Minimal Effort

The key to getting people to do shit for you is to care less (or appear to care less) than others.

Don't do work. A central tenet is that as women, you have the privilege of not needing to work as hard as men, unless you choose to. Society ran without significant female involvement for ages, and men's egos need boosting to do things for you (pay for dates, overachieve at work, propose). Let others, especially men, handle tasks you're too lazy for.

The Threshold Theory. This theory suggests the person who cares most about something will put in the effort to achieve it. To get others to do things for you, appear to care less than they do. This applies to everything from cleaning to getting a guy to contact you.

Maximum result, least effort. Your ultimate goal should always be to achieve the best possible outcome with the least amount of personal effort. This can involve manipulation or seizing opportunities. Caring too much is for nicegirls; chill out and let things fall into your lap.

3. Cultivate an Impeccable and Unapproachable Image

Image is everything.

Perception over reality. How you are perceived by others is paramount, often more important than who you actually are. People judge based on appearance, so looking put-together and attractive is half the battle in making them think you're the shit. This is the "halo effect" – being hot makes people assume you're successful and happy.

Be a masterpiece. Crafting your appearance requires focus, like an artist creating a masterpiece. This means being skinny, tan, having well-maintained hair and nails, and applying makeup skillfully. The goal is to look effortlessly beautiful, not overly done or like you're trying too hard.

Dress slutty, but classy. Your clothing should attract attention and hint at sexiness without being trashy. There's a crucial line between looking like a "slut" and a "whore." Accessories like large sunglasses and high heels enhance your intimidating, wealthy, and unapproachable aura.

4. Master the Art of Strategic Manipulation and Talking Shit

If you're not hot, fucking hilarious, and/or rich, you're not a real person.

Talking shit is essential. Gossiping and being critical are natural female instincts and crucial for entertainment and bonding. It's a way to be honest in a world of fake flattery. Talking shit about others, especially those less attractive or successful, reinforces your own superiority.

Manipulation is key. Talking shit isn't just for fun; it's a tool for manipulation. Expressing mutual dislike for someone can bond you with allies and help you achieve goals, like sabotaging a coworker. However, avoid doing this in front of men, as they don't understand this feminine ritual.

Use language efficiently. Employ abbreviations ("Abbrevs") and nicknames to communicate efficiently and humorously within your circle. This secret language bonds betches and allows for discreet shit-talking. Mastering this dialect shows you're in tune with social norms.

5. Leverage Social Media to Control Your Online Perception

your online persona is now equally as—if not more—important than your real-life identity.

Online image matters. In the digital age, your social media presence is critical to your overall image. It's a platform for mass manipulation, allowing you to project a curated, unrealistically hot version of yourself while appearing nonchalant.

Facebook strategy. Use Facebook sparingly and strategically. Avoid excessive statuses or "likes" that make you seem desperate or boring. Curate your tagged photos and profile picture meticulously to highlight your best features and show you have your shit together, while maintaining an air of mystery.

Twitter and Instagram. Twitter is for concise, witty thoughts and showing you're "in the know." Instagram is for showcasing your fabulous lifestyle through filtered photos, especially travel and social events. Both platforms are tools to remind everyone you're "hot shit" and subtly judge others, but avoid trying too hard or oversharing.

6. Navigate Social Circles with Calculated Selfishness

Fake is better than nothing.

Friends serve a purpose. Your friends are crucial for support, entertainment, and validation, but each serves a distinct purpose (bestie, group photog, anal betch, dud, BSCB, token Asian, gay BFF). Choose friends who "get you" and validate your lifestyle, but also those who are useful or make you look better by comparison.

The Betch Code. While you talk shit about friends, there are unwritten rules about what's acceptable, especially regarding hooking up with guys they've been with. Disregarding this code can lead to being blacklisted. Knowing who you can and can't cross is key to managing relationships.

Manage the outer circle. People you dislike or are mere acquaintances require fake respect and flattery. Complimenting others, even backhandedly, can be a tool for manipulation or simply filling awkward conversation. Stop-and-chats are annoying but useful for gathering gossip. A fake smile is your main weapon for appearing civil while maintaining control.

7. College is a Social Game, Not an Academic Pursuit

the true 'education' in college lies in your social life.

College is a symbol. Attending and graduating college is necessary for status and future job prospects, but the actual academic work is secondary. The real value lies in the social opportunities, networking, and building your personal brand. Choose a school with a good name and a strong social scene.

Avoid academic work. Manipulate your schedule to maximize free time for socializing, drinking, and partying. Choose easy classes, avoid attendance requirements, and rely on "class friends" or cheating to pass. The goal is to get by with minimal effort while maintaining financial support from parents.

Greek life is essential. On most campuses, joining a sorority is necessary for a social life. Rush is a superficial process based on appearance and connections, but it provides automatic friends ("sisters") and access to frat parties. Choose a house that fits your demographic and enhances your social standing.

8. Approach Career with Maximum Gain, Minimum Work

The best way to achieve this is to be aware of the work culture around you, pick the job that best suits your desire to not work, and manipulate others into doing your work for you.

Laziness is a strategy. Hard work is for ugly people and housekeepers. If you're young, hot, and moderately intelligent, you don't need to work hard. The goal is to get others to do your work for you, whether through manipulation, delegation, or leveraging your attractiveness.

Choose the right path. Select a career field that requires minimal actual work but offers perceived glamour or high income potential.

• PR/Fashion/Marketing: Paid to glorify the lifestyle, low salary, high perks.
• Finance/Consulting: High salary, but soul-crushing hours.
• Working for Dad: Job security, but potential inheritance risk.
• Law School: Torturous, pointless unless you're ugly and need a career.
• Med School: Leave it to overachievers, unless it's plastics.

Manipulate the system. Get hired by being attractive and pretending to care. Once employed, avoid work by using the "holdout" strategy, getting male coworkers to help, or manipulating your boss. Become the office favorite by focusing on social activities, not actual tasks. Ask for undeserved raises by highlighting achievements, hinting at leaving, or leveraging potential HR issues.

9. Sex is a Tool for Power and Control

Having sex with you is a prize for which bros should work.

Control the narrative. Sex is a major power play. Unlike men who seek sex mindlessly, women can use their selectivity to their advantage. Withholding sex makes you a prize and forces men to work for your attention and affection.

Know your number and standards. Keep track of sexual partners, but focus more on the standards of the men you choose. Having sex with low-value men (poor, unattractive, low status) devalues you. Your standards, not your number, reflect your self-esteem.

Avoid being TGF. Outwardly "Trying to Get Fucked" is pathetic and signals desperation. Being DTF (Down to Fuck) is acceptable if you maintain control, but TGF projects a vibe that repels desirable men.

Master bedroom manipulation. How you behave in bed matters. Avoid being a sexual bore, but don't act like a whore. Giving head can be a strategic tool ("classic conditioner") to reward good behavior or gain leverage, but avoid it if the guy is unworthy or disrespectful. Faking orgasms is pointless and only benefits the guy.

10. Win the Dating Game Through Strategic Indifference

Winning in this context is the successful execution of giving off that vibe.

The Game. Dating is a game of power and control, not love and affection. The goal is to be on top by being the one who cares the least. This involves a push and pull, challenging the guy while appearing alluringly unattainable.

Avoid nice guys. Nice guys are boring, lack confidence, and don't provide the necessary challenge to keep you interested. They are too easy to win over. Seek out guys with "game" who can match your wit and strategic indifference.

Embrace shadiness. Shady asshole bros, while potentially frustrating, offer the mind games and challenge that nice guys lack. Their unattainability makes them desirable, but be wary of those who are overtly manipulative or cheat constantly.

Date strategically. Screen guys based on appearance, style, and pickup lines. Identify deal breakers early (poor, cheap, social media faux pas, bad etiquette). As relationships progress, watch for hidden deal breakers like cheating, bad sex, rage issues, or mommy complexes. Judge "pros" by their jobs, prioritizing finance and consulting for wealth and status.

11. Embrace the Party Lifestyle as a Core Activity

Knowing how to have an amazing time while simultaneously not being able to remember it is one of the hallmarks of a truly betchy evening (or day).

Partying is work. Conserve energy from productive tasks and channel it into showing everyone how gifted you are at celebrating. Being lame and not partying is a sign of being a nicegirl.

Getting fucked up. Drinking is the preferred method of ingestion, leading to blacking out, which is a hallmark of a betchy evening. Shots are the fastest way to get drunk. Drink strategically (wine before, vodka/tequila at pregame, vodka soda at bar).

Responsible irresponsibility. Party hard, but avoid getting arrested or sent to rehab. Have self-control even when blacking out – be with people slightly more drunk than you, keep your phone charged, bring money.

Handle the aftermath. Master damage control for hangovers, blackout texts, walk of shame, and losing belongings. Hangovers are a valid excuse to do nothing and a chance to talk about yourself. Losing expensive items is just a casualty of the "war on sobriety."

Last updated: May 11, 2025