Facebook Pixel
Searching...
English
EnglishEnglish
EspañolSpanish
简体中文Chinese
FrançaisFrench
DeutschGerman
日本語Japanese
PortuguêsPortuguese
ItalianoItalian
한국어Korean
РусскийRussian
NederlandsDutch
العربيةArabic
PolskiPolish
हिन्दीHindi
Tiếng ViệtVietnamese
SvenskaSwedish
ΕλληνικάGreek
TürkçeTurkish
ไทยThai
ČeštinaCzech
RomânăRomanian
MagyarHungarian
УкраїнськаUkrainian
Bahasa IndonesiaIndonesian
DanskDanish
SuomiFinnish
БългарскиBulgarian
עבריתHebrew
NorskNorwegian
HrvatskiCroatian
CatalàCatalan
SlovenčinaSlovak
LietuviųLithuanian
SlovenščinaSlovenian
СрпскиSerbian
EestiEstonian
LatviešuLatvian
فارسیPersian
മലയാളംMalayalam
தமிழ்Tamil
اردوUrdu
Stress Wisely

Stress Wisely

How to Be Well in an Unwell World
by Robyne Hanley-Dafoe 2023 336 pages
3.93
100+ ratings
Listen

Key Takeaways

1. Stress is inevitable, but our perception shapes its impact

If we believe that our stress is going to kill us, we're probably right. If we believe our stress is not affecting our health, we're also probably right.

Stress is neutral. Our bodies produce the same hormones whether we're experiencing "positive" or "negative" stress. What matters is how we interpret and respond to these physiological reactions. Research shows that people who view stress as enhancing rather than debilitating experience better health outcomes and increased productivity.

Reframe stress as energy. Instead of trying to eliminate stress, focus on harnessing it productively. Recognize stress as a natural part of life that everyone experiences. View yourself as capable of handling and even growing from stressful situations. By shifting our mindset, we can transform stress from a burden into a tool for personal growth and achievement.

2. The Eight Realms of Wellness provide a holistic approach to well-being

Wellness is a direction, not an outcome. There are no finish lines to wellness.

Comprehensive wellness. The Eight Realms of Wellness framework encompasses:

  • Physical (The Body)
  • Emotional (The Heart)
  • Intellectual (The Mind)
  • Social (Community)
  • Environmental (Our World)
  • Occupational (Our Roles)
  • Financial (Resources)
  • Spiritual (The Soul)

This holistic approach recognizes that true wellness isn't about perfecting one area of life, but finding balance and integration across all domains. Each realm influences and supports the others, creating a synergistic effect on overall well-being. By addressing all eight realms, we can cultivate a more resilient, fulfilling, and sustainable approach to health and happiness.

3. Our bodies are marvels of science deserving appreciation and care

Your body has carried you through the worst moments of your life, and it still took in air when you couldn't breathe.

Body appreciation. Shift focus from arbitrary beauty standards to the incredible functions of your body. Your body contains 206 bones, over 600 muscles, and enough blood vessels to circle the Earth three times. It's a scientific marvel that deserves respect and care.

Practical wellness. Instead of punishing diets or extreme exercise regimens, focus on:

  • Adequate hydration
  • Regular, enjoyable movement
  • Consistent, restful sleep
  • Nourishing, satisfying meals

Cultivate a relationship with your body based on gratitude and respect rather than criticism and shame. This approach leads to more sustainable health practices and improved overall well-being.

4. Emotions are vital data, not obstacles to overcome

Emotions are the soundtrack to our lives. What songs are on your mixtape?

Emotional intelligence. Develop the ability to recognize, understand, label, express, and regulate emotions using the RULER framework:

  • Recognizing emotions in self and others
  • Understanding causes and consequences
  • Labeling emotions with nuanced vocabulary
  • Expressing emotions appropriately
  • Regulating emotions with helpful strategies

Emotional myth-busting. Challenge common misconceptions about emotions, such as:

  • There's a "right" way to feel in every situation
  • Negative emotions are always destructive
  • Being emotional means being out of control

Embrace all emotions as valuable information. Practice curiosity and compassion towards your feelings, allowing them to guide you rather than control you.

5. Nature and play are essential for adult well-being

Nature is our first home. It is the Vitamin N so many of us are missing in our lives.

Nature's benefits. Spending time outdoors:

  • Reduces stress and anxiety
  • Improves mood and cognitive function
  • Boosts creativity and problem-solving skills
  • Enhances physical health

Rediscovering play. Adults need play as much as children do. Play:

  • Relieves stress
  • Improves brain function
  • Stimulates creativity
  • Improves relationships
  • Keeps us youthful and energized

Incorporate nature and play into daily life through activities like:

  • Taking short walks outside during breaks
  • Engaging in outdoor hobbies
  • Using apps to identify plants and animals
  • Participating in recreational sports or games
  • Finding moments of wonder in everyday surroundings

6. Work-life integration trumps work-life balance

Life is the main course; work is one extremely important side dish.

Rethinking balance. Instead of striving for perfect work-life balance, focus on integrating work into a fulfilling life. This approach recognizes that work is an important part of life, not a separate entity to be balanced against it.

Practical integration strategies:

  • Do one thing at a time (monotask)
  • Take regular breaks
  • Pay yourself first (self-care before work)
  • Simplify expectations
  • Create a joy playbook
  • Use your calendar strategically
  • Match tasks to your energy levels
  • Cope ahead for challenging days

Prioritize what truly matters in both personal and professional spheres. Regularly reassess and adjust your integration strategies as life circumstances change.

7. Financial wellness starts with understanding your money story

Our money stories are woven into our DNA.

Unpack your money story. Reflect on:

  • What you learned about money from your family
  • Common sayings about money in your upbringing
  • How early lessons affect your current beliefs
  • Whether your beliefs support your values

Shift from scarcity to sufficiency. Cultivate a mindset that:

  • Recognizes there is enough to meet your needs
  • Appreciates what you already have
  • Focuses on sharing and generosity
  • Trusts in your ability to create and attract resources

Financial wellness isn't just about having more money, but about developing a healthy relationship with resources. This includes understanding your emotional connections to money, aligning your financial choices with your values, and finding ways to feel secure and fulfilled regardless of your current financial situation.

8. Spirituality is personal and permeates all aspects of life

Spirituality is not the penthouse of our existence. But rightly understood, it is a vital awareness that pervades all realms of our being.

Broad definition. Spirituality encompasses:

  • Belief in something greater than oneself
  • Search for meaning and purpose
  • Connection to others and the universe
  • Exploration of values and ethics

Personal practices. Cultivate spiritual wellness through:

  • Meditation or prayer
  • Time in nature
  • Acts of service
  • Gratitude practices
  • Meaningful conversations
  • Creative expression

Spirituality doesn't require adherence to organized religion. It's about finding what brings you a sense of connection, purpose, and transcendence. Integrate spiritual practices into daily life to enhance overall well-being and resilience.

9. The Five Forces of Recovery offer immediate relief in stressful moments

You are one moment away from being okay in this very moment.

Immediate relief strategies:

  1. Solitude and Connection: Find balance between alone time and meaningful interactions
  2. Nature: Engage with the natural world, even briefly
  3. Music: Use melodies to shift mood and perspective
  4. Acts of Expression: Release emotions through creative or physical outlets
  5. Gratitude: Focus on appreciation to shift perspective

These forces provide accessible tools for managing stress and improving well-being in the moment. They can be used individually or in combination, depending on the situation and personal preferences. Regular practice of these forces can build resilience and improve overall quality of life.

10. Hope is the anchor that steadies us through life's storms

My future seemed to stretch out before me like a straight road… Now there is a bend in it. I don't know what lies around the bend, but I'm going to believe that the best does.

Cultivate hope. Hope isn't blind optimism, but a belief in possibilities and your ability to navigate challenges. It provides:

  • Resilience in difficult times
  • Motivation to pursue goals
  • Strength to face uncertainties

Practical hope-building:

  • Focus on what you can control
  • Set and work towards meaningful goals
  • Celebrate small victories
  • Surround yourself with supportive people
  • Practice self-compassion
  • Look for examples of positive change

By anchoring ourselves in hope, we can weather life's storms with greater grace and resilience. Hope allows us to see beyond current difficulties and envision a better future, giving us the strength to keep moving forward.

Last updated:

Review Summary

3.93 out of 5
Average of 100+ ratings from Goodreads and Amazon.

The reviews for Stress Wisely are mixed, with ratings ranging from 2 to 5 stars. Some readers found the book helpful, praising its actionable ideas and the author's genuine approach. Others criticized it for being too autobiographical, lacking relevance, and jumping between topics. Positive reviews highlighted the book's thought-provoking nature and easy-to-read format. Negative reviews mentioned the author's personal stories as distracting and the content as common knowledge. Several readers struggled to engage with the book, while others found it insightful and worth revisiting.

Your rating:

About the Author

Robyne Hanley-Dafoe is the author of "Stress Wisely," a book that explores stress management and personal well-being. Her writing style incorporates personal anecdotes and experiences to illustrate concepts related to stress and resilience. Hanley-Dafoe's approach is described as genuine and caring, with a focus on practical ideas for wellness. She has written multiple books on similar topics, suggesting expertise in the field of stress management and personal development. Her work often includes motivational quotes and aims to provide readers with new perspectives on framing and dealing with life's stresses. The author also narrates her own audiobooks, though opinions on her narration skills vary among listeners.

Download PDF

To save this Stress Wisely summary for later, download the free PDF. You can print it out, or read offline at your convenience.
Download PDF
File size: 0.54 MB     Pages: 12

Download EPUB

To read this Stress Wisely summary on your e-reader device or app, download the free EPUB. The .epub digital book format is ideal for reading ebooks on phones, tablets, and e-readers.
Download EPUB
File size: 3.25 MB     Pages: 9
0:00
-0:00
1x
Dan
Andrew
Michelle
Lauren
Select Speed
1.0×
+
200 words per minute
Create a free account to unlock:
Bookmarks – save your favorite books
History – revisit books later
Ratings – rate books & see your ratings
Unlock unlimited listening
Your first week's on us!
Today: Get Instant Access
Listen to full summaries of 73,530 books. That's 12,000+ hours of audio!
Day 4: Trial Reminder
We'll send you a notification that your trial is ending soon.
Day 7: Your subscription begins
You'll be charged on Nov 22,
cancel anytime before.
Compare Features Free Pro
Read full text summaries
Summaries are free to read for everyone
Listen to summaries
12,000+ hours of audio
Unlimited Bookmarks
Free users are limited to 10
Unlimited History
Free users are limited to 10
What our users say
30,000+ readers
“...I can 10x the number of books I can read...”
“...exceptionally accurate, engaging, and beautifully presented...”
“...better than any amazon review when I'm making a book-buying decision...”
Save 62%
Yearly
$119.88 $44.99/yr
$3.75/mo
Monthly
$9.99/mo
Try Free & Unlock
7 days free, then $44.99/year. Cancel anytime.
Settings
Appearance