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The Dark Night of the Soul

The Dark Night of the Soul

A Psychiatrist Explores the Connection Between Darkness and Spiritual Growth
by Gerald G. May 2005 224 pages
4.00
2k+ ratings
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Key Takeaways

1. The Dark Night of the Soul is a transformative spiritual process

The dark night of the soul is a profoundly good thing. It is an ongoing spiritual process in which we are liberated from attachments and compulsions and empowered to live and love more freely.

Misconceptions debunked. The dark night is not restricted to saints or holy people, nor is it simply misfortune. It is a universal experience that can happen to anyone, often multiple times throughout life.

Purpose and nature. The dark night is a process of spiritual transformation, aimed at liberating individuals from attachments and empowering them to love more freely. It operates in hidden ways, beyond conscious control, which can be disturbing but ultimately beneficial.

Key characteristics:

  • Obscurity: The process is mysterious and not fully understood
  • Liberation: Frees individuals from attachments and compulsions
  • Empowerment: Enables more authentic living and loving
  • Universality: Can occur in anyone's life, not just religious figures

2. Love is the core of everything in Teresa and John's theology

Human beings are, in a way, embodiments of the scriptural affirmation that we love because God first loved us.

Divine origin of love. According to Teresa and John, love is the fundamental force behind all creation and human existence. God creates out of love, for the purpose of love, instilling in each person a natural longing for love's fulfillment.

Manifestations of love. This core love expresses itself in various ways:

  • Love for God
  • Love for other people
  • Love for creation
  • Love for life itself

The ultimate goal is to realize and embody this love fully, fulfilling the two great commandments: to love God with one's whole being and to love one's neighbors as oneself.

3. Attachment and idolatry hinder spiritual growth

We grasp and embrace what we can. We achieve what is possible. In the process we taste of beauty, truth, goodness, and meaning, and the tastes keep us going.

Nature of attachment. Attachments are inevitable and often necessary for daily functioning. However, they can become choiceless compulsions that rob us of freedom and hinder our ability to love freely.

Idolatry in spiritual life. We often mistakenly attach ourselves to the "things of God" rather than God's essence:

  • Clinging to religious beliefs
  • Becoming attached to spiritual experiences
  • Idolizing our images of God

These attachments can prevent us from experiencing the true depth of spiritual life and love. The dark night works to free us from these idolatries, allowing for a more authentic relationship with the divine.

4. The dark night liberates desire and expands human freedom

Freedom from attachment enables love to be noncompelled.

Liberation process. The dark night gradually frees the energy of desire from restrictive attachments. This liberation allows for a more authentic expression of love, unhindered by compulsions or ego-driven motivations.

Expanded freedom. As attachments loosen, individuals experience:

  • Greater openness to God and life situations
  • Increased capacity for selfless love
  • More authentic self-expression
  • Enhanced ability to respond to divine inspiration

This newfound freedom is not directionless but is oriented towards the fulfillment of love, guided by divine wisdom rather than personal agendas.

5. Meditation transitions to contemplation in spiritual growth

Contemplation is loving. And this love can neither be practiced nor achieved.

Meditation characteristics:

  • Involves intentional effort and focus
  • Uses faculties like intellect, memory, and imagination
  • Can be practiced and improved through discipline

Contemplation qualities:

  • Arises as a gift, cannot be achieved through effort
  • Characterized by openness and present-centeredness
  • Fundamentally rooted in love, beyond human control

Transition process. The shift from meditation to contemplation is often marked by:

  • Dryness in traditional prayer methods
  • Loss of satisfaction in familiar spiritual practices
  • Growing desire for simple presence with God
  • Increasing moments of effortless awareness

This transition is a key aspect of spiritual growth, reflecting a deeper surrender to divine grace and a more intimate connection with God.

6. The dark night is an ongoing process with intermittent experiences

We have periodic conscious experiences of it, but it continues at all times, hidden within us.

Continuous nature. The dark night is not a single event but an ongoing spiritual process that characterizes our entire life with God. It operates constantly, often beneath our awareness.

Intermittent awareness. We become conscious of the dark night through periodic experiences:

  • Times of spiritual dryness or confusion
  • Moments of letting go of old attachments
  • Glimpses of deeper truth or love
  • Experiences of loss that lead to growth

Cyclic pattern. Teresa emphasizes that even advanced individuals often return to earlier stages, highlighting the non-linear nature of spiritual growth. This understanding encourages patience and trust in the process, even when progress seems slow or unclear.

7. Depression and the dark night can coexist but are distinct

If someone is experiencing symptoms of significant depression, it is important that those symptoms be recognized and acknowledged, and that the person receive at least a psychiatric consultation concerning treatment.

Distinguishing features:

  • Depression: Often impairs overall functioning and sense of self-worth
  • Dark night: May involve struggle but doesn't typically diminish core sense of meaning or value

Coexistence. It's possible to experience both depression and the dark night simultaneously. The dark night can be depressing, and depression can be part of a dark night experience.

Treatment approach.

  • Acknowledge and treat depression when present, regardless of spiritual context
  • Recognize that treating depression doesn't interfere with genuine spiritual processes
  • Understand that medications and therapy can support overall well-being, including spiritual growth

8. Addiction recovery can lead to spiritual awakening

No one understands the dark night of the soul better than people recovering from life-threatening addictions.

Addiction as catalyst. The process of overcoming addiction often brings individuals to a profound spiritual crisis, forcing them to confront their deepest needs and desires.

Stages of spiritual growth in recovery:

  1. Initial dependence on a Higher Power for survival
  2. Transition from desperate need to loving desire for God
  3. Potential "dark night of recovery" as attachment to recovery itself is challenged
  4. Deeper freedom and love emerging from the process

This journey illustrates how even painful experiences like addiction can become pathways to spiritual transformation and a more authentic relationship with the divine.

9. Spiritual companionship requires careful discernment

Be careful not to choose someone who will teach you to become a toad, satisfied only with catching little lizards.

Importance of discernment. Teresa and John emphasize the need for careful selection of spiritual directors or companions, as misdirection can be harmful to spiritual growth.

Qualities to seek:

  • Academic and scriptural knowledge
  • Personal experience in prayer and spiritual life
  • Ability to respect the unique journey of each individual
  • Willingness to allow God's work without excessive interference

Common pitfalls:

  • Trying to control or manipulate the spiritual process
  • Imposing personal beliefs or experiences on others
  • Failing to recognize the subtle workings of divine grace

Good spiritual companionship supports and illuminates the individual's journey without attempting to direct or force outcomes.

10. The dark night may apply to social systems and communities

Maybe, sometimes, in the midst of things going terribly wrong, something is going just right.

Collective experiences. The concept of the dark night can potentially be applied to social systems, communities, and even cultures experiencing periods of upheaval or transformation.

Signs in social contexts:

  • Breakdown of old ways of functioning
  • Confusion and loss of direction
  • Emergence of new, often challenging, dynamics
  • Potential for deeper collective growth and transformation

Hopeful perspective. While it's difficult to definitively identify a collective dark night, this concept offers a hopeful framework for understanding societal challenges. It suggests that periods of difficulty may be part of a larger process of growth and renewal.

11. God's vulnerability and human suffering are interconnected

When bad things happen to us, they also happen to God.

Divine participation in suffering. Many contemplatives perceive God as being wounded alongside humanity, sharing in our sufferings as well as our joys.

Implications:

  • Challenges the notion of an distant, unaffected deity
  • Suggests a deeply intimate relationship between God and creation
  • Offers comfort in the idea that our pain is understood and shared
  • Invites a new understanding of intercessory prayer as "keeping God company"

This perspective transforms our understanding of suffering, suggesting that even in our darkest moments, we are intimately connected to and understood by the divine.

Last updated:

Review Summary

4.00 out of 5
Average of 2k+ ratings from Goodreads and Amazon.

The Dark Night of the Soul by Gerald May explores the spiritual journey through darkness, drawing on the works of St. John of the Cross and Teresa of Avila. Readers praise May's accessible approach to complex mystical concepts, blending psychology and spirituality. The book offers insights into personal growth, attachment, and the transformative power of spiritual darkness. Many found it helpful in understanding their own struggles and spiritual experiences. While some readers found parts challenging, most appreciated May's compassionate and enlightening perspective on the dark night as a path to deeper spiritual connection.

Your rating:

About the Author

Gerald G. May, M.D. was a psychiatrist and spiritual counselor who explored the intersection of psychology and spirituality. He authored several books on contemplative spirituality and served as a senior fellow in contemplative theology and psychology at the Shalem Institute for Spiritual Formation. May's work focused on integrating psychological insights with spiritual practices, particularly drawing from Christian mystical traditions. He was known for his ability to make complex spiritual concepts accessible to modern readers, blending his clinical experience with a deep understanding of contemplative spirituality. May's writings continue to influence those seeking to understand the relationship between mental health and spiritual growth.

Other books by Gerald G. May

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