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Dare to Lead

Dare to Lead

作者 Brené Brown 2018 332 页数
4.18
100k+ 评分
Listen to Summary

重点摘要

1. 拥抱脆弱以培养勇气和连接

脆弱并不是胜利或失败,而是在无法控制结果时,依然勇敢地展现自己。

脆弱是力量。 与普遍看法相反,脆弱并不是弱点,而是创新、创造力和变革的源泉。它要求我们暴露于潜在的情感风险、不确定性和失败之中。通过拥抱脆弱,我们能够打开自己,建立更真实的连接和体验。

勇气源于脆弱。 当我们选择脆弱时,我们是在选择勇气而非舒适。这一选择使我们能够:

  • 建立更深层次的关系
  • 促进创新和创造力
  • 提高自我意识
  • 增强面对失败的韧性

实践脆弱的方法:

  • 与值得信赖的同事分享你的挣扎和恐惧
  • 承认自己并不总是有答案
  • 在工作和个人生活中承担经过深思熟虑的风险
  • 在需要时寻求帮助

2. 练习同理心和自我同情以建立羞耻韧性

羞耻的力量源于无法言说。这就是它为何喜欢完美主义者——因为这让我们保持沉默。

羞耻在沉默中滋生。 羞耻是一种普遍的人类体验,能够深刻影响我们的个人和职业生活。它是一种强烈的痛苦感,令我们觉得自己有缺陷,因此不配得到爱和归属。通过识别和谈论羞耻,我们开始拆解它对我们的控制力。

同理心和自我同情是羞耻的解药。 要建立羞耻韧性:

  1. 识别羞耻及其触发因素
  2. 练习批判性意识
  3. 向他人求助
  4. 讨论羞耻

同理心包括:

  • 站在他人的角度看问题
  • 避免评判
  • 识别他人的情感
  • 传达你的理解

自我同情要求:

  • 对自己友善,而不是自我评判
  • 认识到我们共同的人性
  • 保持正念,而不是过度认同我们的想法

3. 通过将价值观转化为具体行为来践行价值观

如果我们希望人们能够完全展现自己,包括他们未加防备的、完整的内心——以便我们能够创新、解决问题并服务他人——我们必须时刻关注创造一种文化,让人们感到安全、被看见、被倾听和受到尊重。

价值观引导决策。 确定并践行我们的价值观为应对困难情境和做出艰难选择提供了北极星。然而,单单陈述价值观是不够的;我们必须将其转化为具体、可观察的行为。

践行你的价值观:

  1. 确定你的两个核心价值观
  2. 定义支持每个价值观的3-4个行为
  3. 识别与价值观不符的“滑动”行为
  4. 在未能达成时练习自我同情

价值观转化为行为的示例:

  • 价值观:勇气
    • 行为:在会议中发言,即使我的观点不同
    • 行为:在创新项目中承担经过深思熟虑的风险
  • 价值观:诚信
    • 行为:即使不方便也要履行承诺
    • 行为:承认错误并对结果负责

4. 通过持续的小行动建立信任

信任是小瞬间和相互脆弱的叠加与积累。信任与脆弱共同成长,背叛其中之一就是摧毁两者。

信任在小瞬间中建立。 信任并不是通过宏大的举动或单一事件建立的。相反,它是通过持续的小行动来培养的,这些行动展示了可靠性、责任感和诚信。这些“信任存款”随着时间的推移而积累,形成相互尊重和理解的基础。

建立信任的BRAVING清单:

  • 界限:尊重并询问界限
  • 可靠性:做到你所说的
  • 责任感:承担错误并进行补救
  • 保密:保持机密
  • 诚信:选择勇气而非舒适
  • 非评判:在不评判的情况下请求所需
  • 慷慨:对他人的意图给予最慷慨的解读

建立信任的方法:

  • 在言语和行动上保持一致
  • 开诚布公地沟通
  • 履行承诺
  • 尊重他人的界限并维护自己的界限
  • 通过承认错误和寻求帮助来展示脆弱

5. 学会给予和接受建设性反馈

如果你不愿意给予和接受反馈,你就还没有准备好领导。

反馈对成长至关重要。 有效的领导者必须具备给予和接受反馈的能力。这需要创造一种心理安全的文化,使诚实的对话能够在没有报复或评判的恐惧下进行。

给予反馈的指导原则:

  • 具体并关注行为,而非性格
  • 及时提供反馈
  • 平衡积极反馈与建设性反馈
  • 使用“我”语句表达你的观察
  • 提供可行的改进建议

有效接受反馈的方法:

  • 积极倾听而不防御
  • 提出澄清性问题以充分理解
  • 感谢反馈者
  • 在回应前反思反馈
  • 根据反馈决定采取何种行动(如果有的话)

创造一个反馈丰富的文化:

  • 通过自己请求反馈来树立脆弱的榜样
  • 认可并奖励那些给予和接受反馈良好的人
  • 使反馈成为团队互动的常规部分,而不仅仅是年度评审
  • 提供有效反馈技巧的培训

6. 通过主动教授“复苏技能”来培养韧性

如果我们不为人们准备好应对困难的能力,就不能指望他们勇敢并冒险失败。

韧性是一种学习技能。 从挫折和失败中反弹的能力并不是与生俱来的;它可以并且应该被教授。通过主动发展“复苏技能”,个人和组织可以创造一种拥抱冒险和创新的文化。

韧性的关键组成部分:

  1. 觉醒:识别情感并对其产生好奇
  2. 斗争:拥有我们的故事并挑战我们的假设
  3. 革命:书写新的结局并改变我们与世界的互动方式

发展复苏技能的方法:

  • 练习情感意识和调节
  • 培养将失败视为学习机会的成长心态
  • 发展解决问题和批判性思维的能力
  • 建立强大的支持网络
  • 鼓励在挫折后进行反思和意义构建

组织可以通过以下方式支持韧性:

  • 在入职和职业发展中纳入复苏技能培训
  • 创建安全空间,让员工讨论失败并从中学习
  • 认可和奖励努力和学习,而不仅仅是结果
  • 在领导层面树立韧性的榜样

7. 识别并挑战我们讲述给自己的故事

我在告诉自己的故事...

我们的故事塑造我们的现实。 在缺乏完整信息的情况下,我们的大脑自然会创造故事来理解情境。这些故事往往基于过去的经历和恐惧,能够显著影响我们的行为和决策。通过识别和挑战这些叙述,我们可以做出更明智的选择,更有效地应对挑战。

挑战你故事的步骤:

  1. 识别何时被情绪所困
  2. 对你的情感反应产生好奇
  3. 确定你在告诉自己的故事
  4. 挑战你故事中的假设
  5. 如有必要,收集更多信息
  6. 根据更平衡的视角重写故事

需要注意的常见故事主题:

  • 灾难化:假设最坏的结果
  • 心灵阅读:相信你知道他人在想什么
  • 个人化:将可能与自己无关的事情视为针对自己
  • 过度概括:基于单一事件做出广泛结论

通过实践这一过程,我们可以:

  • 减少误解和冲突
  • 做出更理性的决策
  • 改善我们的关系和沟通
  • 提高我们的情商和自我意识

最后更新日期:

FAQ

What's Dare to Lead about?

  • Focus on Leadership: Dare to Lead by Brené Brown explores the role of vulnerability, courage, and empathy in effective leadership. It emphasizes the need for leaders to embrace their own vulnerabilities to build trust and connection within their teams.
  • Courageous Cultures: The book advocates for creating environments where employees feel safe to take risks and express their ideas, leading to better performance and innovation.
  • Research-Based Insights: Brown draws on two decades of research, including interviews with leaders, to provide actionable strategies for developing daring leadership skills.

Why should I read Dare to Lead?

  • Transformative Leadership Skills: The book offers practical tools and insights that can transform your approach to leadership, teaching how to lead with empathy and authenticity.
  • Addressing Vulnerability: Brown argues that embracing vulnerability is essential for effective leadership, a perspective often overlooked in traditional leadership training.
  • Real-World Applications: The concepts are applicable across various fields and industries, making it relevant for anyone in a leadership position or aspiring to be one.

What are the key takeaways of Dare to Lead?

  • Rumbling with Vulnerability: Engaging in honest conversations about fears and uncertainties is crucial for building trust and connection.
  • Living into Our Values: Aligning actions with personal and organizational values fosters integrity and authenticity in leadership.
  • Braving Trust: Building trust through transparency and accountability is essential for creating a supportive work environment.

What is the BRAVING Inventory in Dare to Lead?

  • Definition of BRAVING: The BRAVING Inventory is a tool to assess and build trust, standing for Boundaries, Reliability, Accountability, Vault, Integrity, Nonjudgment, and Generosity.
  • Purpose of the Inventory: It serves as a guide for leaders to evaluate their own trustworthiness and that of their colleagues, encouraging open conversations about trust.
  • Practical Application: Leaders can use it to facilitate discussions about trust within their teams, fostering a more supportive and collaborative environment.

What is the concept of "rumbling with vulnerability" in Dare to Lead?

  • Engaging in Tough Conversations: It refers to having open and honest discussions about difficult topics, encouraging leaders and teams to confront fears and uncertainties together.
  • Building Trust: By engaging in these conversations, leaders create a safe space for team members to express their thoughts and feelings, building trust and strengthening relationships.
  • Skill Development: Brown provides tools and strategies for effectively navigating these conversations, enhancing team dynamics and performance.

How does Dare to Lead define vulnerability?

  • Vulnerability as Strength: Brown defines vulnerability as "the emotion experienced during times of uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure," positioning it as a source of strength.
  • Connection to Courage: Vulnerability is essential for courage, allowing individuals to show up authentically and take risks, leading to greater innovation and creativity.
  • Cultural Implications: By redefining vulnerability, leaders can foster a more inclusive and supportive environment, countering societal norms that discourage vulnerability.

How does Dare to Lead address the issue of shame in leadership?

  • Shame as a Barrier: Shame is identified as a significant barrier to effective leadership, leading to disconnection and fear.
  • Empathy as an Antidote: Empathy is emphasized as the antidote to shame, helping team members feel valued and connected.
  • Shame Resilience: Brown introduces shame resilience, which involves practicing authenticity and moving through shame without sacrificing values, crucial for effective leadership.

What role does empathy play in Dare to Lead?

  • Foundation of Connection: Empathy is a linchpin of cultures built on connection and trust, allowing leaders to understand and support their team members effectively.
  • Five Elements of Empathy: Brown outlines five elements of empathy that can be learned and practiced, helping leaders engage with their teams on a deeper level.
  • Distinction from Sympathy: Empathy is different from sympathy, which often involves judgment or advice. Empathy requires active listening and understanding without trying to fix the situation.

What are the best quotes from Dare to Lead and what do they mean?

  • “Courage starts with showing up and letting ourselves be seen.”: Highlights the foundational role of vulnerability in courageous leadership, suggesting leaders must be open and authentic to inspire others.
  • “We can’t give what we don’t have.”: Emphasizes the importance of self-care and self-awareness in leadership, as leaders must cultivate their own emotional health to support their teams effectively.
  • “Clear is kind. Unclear is unkind.”: Underscores the necessity of clarity in communication, suggesting that being direct and honest is a form of kindness that fosters trust and understanding.

How can I implement the lessons from Dare to Lead in my organization?

  • Start with Vulnerability: Encourage open discussions about vulnerability within your team, creating a safe space for sharing fears and uncertainties.
  • Align Values and Actions: Work on aligning your team's actions with shared values, fostering integrity and strengthening commitment to goals.
  • Practice Empathy: Incorporate empathy into your leadership style by actively listening and validating team members' feelings, building trust and connection.

How does Dare to Lead define empathy?

  • Empathy as Connection: Defined as "connecting to the feeling under the experience," meaning understanding and sharing the emotions of others rather than just their experiences.
  • Empathy is a Skill: Emphasized as a skill that can be developed and practiced, crucial for effective leadership.
  • Empathy vs. Sympathy: Empathy fuels connection, while sympathy drives disconnection. Empathy involves feeling with someone, whereas sympathy often involves feeling for someone from a distance.

How can I practice the skills outlined in Dare to Lead?

  • Engage in Difficult Conversations: Lean into tough conversations rather than avoiding them, practicing open and honest communication to build trust and understanding.
  • Use the BRAVING Inventory: Regularly assess your own trustworthiness and that of your colleagues, identifying areas for growth and fostering a culture of accountability.
  • Cultivate Empathy: Make a conscious effort to connect with others on an emotional level, practicing active listening and encouraging others to share their feelings and experiences.

评论

4.18 满分 5
平均评分来自 100k+ 来自Goodreads和亚马逊的评分.

《勇敢领导》获得了褒贬不一的评价。许多人赞扬布朗在脆弱性、同理心和领导力方面的见解,认为这本书既鼓舞人心,又适用于工作和个人生活。然而,也有人批评其内容重复,缺乏实用建议,过于关注作者的个人经历。读者们欣赏布朗通俗易懂的写作风格和基于研究的方法,但也有一些人觉得内容可以更为精简。这本书的影响因人而异,有些人认为它改变了他们的生活,而另一些人则将其视为对她之前作品的重述。

Your rating:

关于作者

布伦妮·布朗是一位著名的研究者、作家和演讲者,专注于勇气、脆弱、羞耻和同理心等主题。她在休斯顿大学和德克萨斯大学奥斯汀分校担任重要学术职务。布朗著有五本《纽约时报》畅销书,并主持两档受欢迎的播客。她关于脆弱性的TED演讲已获得超过5000万次观看,成为全球观看次数最多的TED演讲之一。布朗的工作还扩展到Netflix特别节目《勇气的召唤》。她与家人居住在休斯顿,并通过她在个人成长和领导力方面的研究与著作,继续影响着数百万人的生活。

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