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The Millionth Circle

The Millionth Circle

How to Change Ourselves and The World: The Essential Guide to Women's Circles
by Jean Shinoda Bolen 1999 108 pages
4.1
100+ ratings
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Key Takeaways

1. Women's circles can transform society and usher in a post-patriarchal era

When a critical number of people change how they think and behave, the culture does also, and a new era begins.

A revolutionary movement. Women's circles, though seemingly simple gatherings, have the potential to catalyze profound societal change. By providing spaces for women to connect, share, and support one another, these circles foster personal growth and collective empowerment.

Changing the cultural paradigm. As more women participate in circles, they develop new ways of thinking and behaving that challenge patriarchal norms. This shift in perspective ripples outward, influencing relationships, workplaces, and communities. The cumulative effect of these changes can lead to a broader cultural transformation, moving society towards a more balanced and inclusive paradigm.

Hidden in plain sight. The power of women's circles lies in their unassuming nature. While they may appear to be merely social gatherings, they are quietly nurturing a revolution in consciousness and relationships. This grassroots approach allows for organic, sustainable change that can ultimately reshape societal structures and values.

2. The "millionth circle" concept draws from the hundredth monkey phenomenon

If you have ever walked a labyrinth, the journey is like this. You walk and walk, following a path that turns and changes directions over and over. You have no way of knowing how far it is to the center, until suddenly you are there.

A critical mass for change. The "millionth circle" concept is inspired by the hundredth monkey phenomenon, which suggests that when a critical number of individuals adopt a new behavior or idea, it can spread rapidly throughout a population. In this context, the formation of women's circles is seen as the catalyst for widespread societal transformation.

Incremental progress, sudden shift. Like walking a labyrinth, the journey towards cultural change may seem circuitous and unpredictable. Each new circle formed contributes to the collective momentum, even if the impact isn't immediately apparent. The process continues until a tipping point is reached, at which time the changes become more visible and widespread.

Every circle counts. This concept emphasizes the importance of each individual circle, as every group contributes to the larger movement. It encourages women to form and participate in circles, knowing that their efforts are part of a greater whole that is slowly but surely reshaping society.

3. Forming a circle requires intention, planning, and inviting the right people

To cast something has several meanings: as in casting a net or a fishing line, or as in casting a magic circle, or as in casting a movie or a play and selecting who will be in it.

Intentional creation. Forming a women's circle is an act of intention and creativity. It requires careful consideration of the circle's purpose, structure, and membership. This process is likened to casting a net or a magic circle, emphasizing the deliberate nature of bringing women together for a shared purpose.

Key considerations:

  • Who to invite: Consider compatibility, shared interests, and diversity
  • Purpose: Define the circle's focus (e.g., support, spirituality, creativity)
  • Logistics: Determine meeting frequency, duration, and location
  • Format: Decide on structure, rituals, and activities

Flexibility in approach. There are multiple ways to form a circle, from inviting close friends to open calls for participants. The key is to find an approach that aligns with the circle's intended purpose and the organizer's vision.

4. Centering the circle creates a sacred space and fosters connection

The connection to the center is intuitively felt, purely subjective. In silence or singing or hum, each woman connects with her own center, connects with the center of the circle, and feels like both a spoke and a part of the rim.

Creating sacred space. Centering the circle is a crucial practice that transforms a gathering of women into a sacred, intentional space. This process helps participants shift their focus from everyday concerns to the present moment and the group's shared purpose.

Methods for centering:

  • Silence or meditation
  • Singing or chanting
  • Lighting a candle
  • Holding hands
  • Visualizing a shared center

Deepening connection. The act of centering allows each woman to connect with herself, the group, and a sense of something greater. This fosters a feeling of unity and shared purpose, enhancing the circle's potential for meaningful interaction and personal growth.

5. Equality and mutual support are fundamental to a circle's success

The circle is a principle as well as a shape. It goes counter to the social order, pecking order, superior/inferior, ranking order that compares each individual woman to others.

Egalitarian structure. The circular format inherently promotes equality among participants, challenging hierarchical social norms. This structure encourages each woman to see herself and others as equally valuable contributors to the group.

Practices for fostering equality:

  • Taking turns speaking
  • Active listening
  • Consensus decision-making
  • Rotating leadership or facilitation roles

Mutual aid and learning. In a circle of equals, women become witnesses, role models, and sources of support for one another. This environment facilitates personal growth, empowerment, and the development of new skills and perspectives.

6. Trust and confidentiality are essential for a safe circle environment

What is said in confidence is held in confidence. Plain and simple.

Building trust. A safe circle environment is built on a foundation of trust and confidentiality. This allows women to share openly and authentically, knowing that their vulnerabilities will be respected and protected.

Key elements of a safe circle:

  • Confidentiality agreements
  • Respectful communication
  • Non-judgmental attitudes
  • Honoring personal boundaries

Fostering authenticity. When women feel safe in the circle, they are more likely to reveal their true selves, share their challenges, and explore new possibilities. This authenticity deepens the connections within the group and enhances the potential for personal and collective growth.

7. Addressing conflicts and challenges is crucial for a circle's health

Sometimes facing what needs to be said and needs to be done becomes an unexpected turning point, not an end.

Inevitable challenges. Like any group, women's circles can face conflicts, personality clashes, or other difficulties. Addressing these issues directly and compassionately is essential for maintaining the circle's integrity and effectiveness.

Strategies for conflict resolution:

  • Open communication
  • Active listening
  • Seeking consensus
  • Honoring individual needs while maintaining group cohesion

Growth through adversity. When handled well, conflicts and challenges can become opportunities for growth, both for individuals and the circle as a whole. They can deepen understanding, strengthen bonds, and lead to new insights and ways of relating.

8. Rituals and ceremonies enhance the circle's spiritual and emotional impact

Rituals are just elaborations of this.

Sacred touchstones. Incorporating rituals and ceremonies into circle gatherings can deepen the spiritual and emotional experience for participants. These practices help create a sense of continuity, mark important transitions, and connect the circle to broader spiritual or cultural traditions.

Examples of circle rituals:

  • Opening and closing ceremonies
  • Candle lighting
  • Altar creation
  • Seasonal celebrations
  • Rites of passage

Balancing structure and spontaneity. While rituals provide a helpful framework, it's important to maintain flexibility and authenticity in their use. The most effective rituals are those that resonate deeply with the circle's members and purpose.

9. Women's circles can be powerful agents of personal and societal change

Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.

Catalysts for transformation. Women's circles provide a supportive environment for personal growth, empowerment, and healing. As individual women transform, they carry these changes into their families, workplaces, and communities, creating a ripple effect of positive change.

Spheres of influence:

  • Personal relationships
  • Professional environments
  • Community involvement
  • Political engagement

Collective wisdom and action. By bringing women together in a supportive, egalitarian setting, circles tap into collective wisdom and inspire collaborative action. This can lead to innovative solutions to personal and societal challenges, as well as grassroots movements for social change.

Last updated:

Review Summary

4.1 out of 5
Average of 100+ ratings from Goodreads and Amazon.

The Millionth Circle is highly praised for its insights on women's circles and their potential to create social change. Readers appreciate its wisdom on group dynamics, communication, and personal growth. Many find it inspiring and transformative, recommending it for anyone interested in egalitarian relationships. Some critics feel the book is too thin on content and repetitive. Overall, reviewers value the book's emphasis on the power of women coming together to support each other and spark positive change in society.

Your rating:

About the Author

Jean Shinoda Bolen, M.D. is a distinguished psychiatrist, Jungian analyst, and clinical professor at the University of California San Francisco. Her contributions to the field have earned her numerous accolades, including recognition from the American Psychiatric Association and the Institute for Health and Healing. Bolen's work extends beyond academia, as she has been involved with the Ms. Foundation for Women. Her expertise in psychiatry, combined with her involvement in women's issues, informs her writing on topics such as women's circles and their potential for personal and societal transformation.

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