Heart of Tantric Sex

1. Tantra: The Union of Sex and Meditation

"Tantra most simply defined is the union of sex and meditation."

Tantra transforms sex into a spiritual practice by introducing consciousness and awareness into the sexual act. It aims to elevate sex beyond mere physical pleasure or reproduction to a tool for personal growth, healing, and spiritual enlightenment.

Key aspects of Tantric sex include:

• Focusing on the present moment
• Emphasizing relaxation over excitement
• Cultivating a deep connection with oneself and one's partner
• Viewing the body as a vehicle for energy and consciousness

By integrating meditative practices into lovemaking, Tantra offers a path to profound intimacy, expanded states of consciousness, and a deeper sense of unity with oneself, one's partner, and the universe.

2. Polarity: The Key to Sexual Magnetism

"The greatest insight of Tantra, indeed its cornerstone, is that masculine and feminine energies are equal and opposite forces."

Understanding sexual polarity is crucial for unlocking the full potential of sexual energy. In Tantra, the masculine is seen as positive/active energy, while the feminine is negative/receptive energy. This polarity creates a magnetic attraction and energetic flow between partners.

Key points about polarity:

• Men's positive pole is the penis, negative pole is the heart
• Women's positive pole is the breasts/heart, negative pole is the vagina
• Emphasizing these polarities during lovemaking enhances attraction and pleasure
• Balancing and harmonizing these energies within oneself leads to greater wholeness

By consciously working with these polarities, couples can create a more dynamic and fulfilling sexual experience, tapping into the natural flow of energy between masculine and feminine principles.

3. Relaxation: The Gateway to Ecstatic Sex

"Relaxation is the whole ambience of Tantra."

Deep relaxation is essential for accessing higher states of sexual pleasure and consciousness. Unlike conventional sex, which often involves tension and effort, Tantric sex emphasizes letting go and surrendering to the present moment.

Benefits of relaxation in sex:

• Increases sensitivity and awareness
• Allows for deeper emotional connection
• Facilitates the free flow of sexual energy
• Enables longer-lasting lovemaking sessions

Techniques for cultivating relaxation include conscious breathing, body awareness exercises, and letting go of goal-oriented thinking. By learning to relax deeply during sex, couples can access profound states of ecstasy and union that go far beyond ordinary orgasmic experiences.

4. Presence: Shifting from Doing to Being in Sex

"We must bring relaxation into the sexual act so that it becomes a magical unfolding rather than a fixed routine."

Being fully present during lovemaking is a cornerstone of Tantric practice. This involves shifting from a goal-oriented, performance-based approach to sex to one of moment-to-moment awareness and receptivity.

Strategies for cultivating presence:

• Focusing on sensations in the body
• Maintaining eye contact with your partner
• Communicating openly about your experience
• Letting go of expectations and desired outcomes

By embracing presence, couples can transform sex from a mechanical act into a profound exploration of consciousness and connection. This shift allows for spontaneity, creativity, and a deeper sense of intimacy to emerge naturally in the lovemaking process.

5. Conscious Genitals: Awakening Sexual Intelligence

"Conscious genitals are tremendously sensitive and alive to each other."

Developing genital consciousness involves bringing heightened awareness and sensitivity to the sexual organs. This practice helps to awaken the innate intelligence and responsiveness of the genitals, leading to more fulfilling and ecstatic sexual experiences.

Key aspects of genital consciousness:

• Focusing awareness on subtle sensations in the genitals
• Relaxing the pelvic floor and surrounding muscles
• Cultivating a sense of energetic connection between partners' genitals
• Allowing the genitals to guide the lovemaking process

By developing conscious genitals, couples can tap into a deeper level of sexual communication and pleasure, moving beyond friction-based stimulation to a more refined and satisfying energetic exchange.

6. Love Keys: Practical Tools for Tantric Lovemaking

"The Love Keys will strengthen your rapport with your lover and a new intimacy will grow."

Love Keys are practical techniques for enhancing presence, connection, and pleasure during lovemaking. These tools help couples shift from conventional, goal-oriented sex to a more conscious and fulfilling Tantric approach.

Some important Love Keys include:

• Maintaining eye contact
• Conscious breathing
• Communicating feelings and sensations
• Relaxing the genitals and pelvic floor
• Soft penetration and prolonged stillness
• Rotating positions to maintain presence

By experimenting with these Love Keys, couples can gradually transform their sexual experiences, deepening intimacy and accessing new levels of pleasure and connection.

7. Emotional Healing: Transforming Pain into Passion

"When we bring new intelligence to lovemaking, we come to understand the fluctuations from good to bad times."

Conscious lovemaking can be a powerful tool for emotional healing and transformation. As couples bring greater awareness to their sexual experiences, they often uncover and release deep-seated emotional pain and trauma.

Aspects of emotional healing through Tantra:

• Distinguishing between present feelings and past emotions
• Allowing suppressed emotions to surface during lovemaking
• Using sexual energy to transform pain into pleasure
• Developing greater emotional intimacy and trust with one's partner

By approaching sex as a healing practice, couples can work through emotional blockages, deepen their connection, and cultivate greater overall well-being and vitality in their lives.

8. Non-Ejaculation: Conserving Sexual Energy

"Tantra is interested in non-ejaculation which is not to be confused with ejaculation control."

Practicing non-ejaculation is a key aspect of Tantric sexuality for men. This involves learning to separate orgasm from ejaculation and circulating sexual energy throughout the body rather than releasing it.

Benefits of non-ejaculation:

• Increased vitality and overall energy
• Prolonged lovemaking sessions
• Access to multiple and full-body orgasms
• Deeper emotional connection with one's partner

Techniques for non-ejaculation include conscious breathing, pelvic floor exercises, and energy circulation practices. By mastering this skill, men can experience profound states of pleasure and ecstasy while conserving their vital energy.

9. Female Sexuality: Awakening the Divine Feminine

"When a woman is authentic, she becomes orgasmic and glowing, the source of love."

Tantric approaches to female sexuality focus on awakening a woman's innate capacity for profound pleasure, love, and spiritual connection. This involves moving beyond goal-oriented, clitoral-focused orgasms to embrace a more holistic and expansive sexual experience.

Key aspects of Tantric female sexuality:

• Emphasizing breast and heart stimulation as gateways to arousal
• Cultivating vaginal sensitivity and awareness
• Exploring full-body, wave-like orgasms
• Connecting sexual energy with spiritual energy

By embracing these practices, women can tap into their natural capacity for multi-orgasmic, ecstatic experiences and embody the divine feminine energy within themselves.

10. Cycles and Health: Harmonizing with Natural Rhythms

"Relaxation is the ever-healing force."

Recognizing and working with natural cycles is an important aspect of Tantric sexuality. This includes honoring menstrual cycles, hormonal fluctuations, and the ebb and flow of sexual desire.

Key points about cycles and health:

• Using conscious lovemaking to alleviate menstrual discomfort
• Adapting sexual practices to different phases of the menstrual cycle
• Acknowledging and working with male hormonal cycles
• Addressing genital health issues through relaxation and awareness

By aligning their sexual practices with natural rhythms and cycles, couples can enhance their overall health, vitality, and sexual satisfaction. This approach emphasizes the interconnectedness of sexual well-being with physical, emotional, and spiritual health.

Last updated: April 17, 2025